OK - the pics are now back yet again - this time with permission from Sarah Louise and the team Note- Contains Graphic Surgical Pictures
It's taken me a while to get around to posting my pics here.
This is what I arrived at CX with in September 2010. It doesn't look wildly impressive at rest and was six-and-a-quarter inches erectwangbar.plus. com/ preop.jpg
I had my op first thing the next day. By lunchtime I was awake and sat up chatting to the other girls and later posted on TZone - you can track down all my posts about my surgery and progress afterwards on Transgenderzone.
Pain wasn't at all bad and nor was it underneath where I had expected. Instead it was more like a mild and dull ache in my lower abdomen. I kept hitting the morphine button every so often and was never in any serious pain.
The pressure bandage is uncomfortable, stops you closing your legs and feels like a lot of pressure on your abdomen. A catheter emerged from it into a large bag hung on the bed siderail. There was also a thin surgical drain tube emerging from the centre of my abdomen.
at lunchtime the day after my op, they took out the drain tube - that hurt, a horrible sensation as if a burning string was being drawn out, but it was very brief, maybe two seconds in total. They took off the pressure bandage and took away my morphine. I was scared of losing that and gave it a good few presses beforehand, which resulted in me puking my dinner back in spectacular fashion an hour later :lol:
They replaced the catheter bag with a stylish knee-mounted version, gave me a HUGE sanitary pad shaped like a figure 8 and intended for women who have just given birth and a pair of knickers to hold it in place. They were made of stuff like a white hairnet so holding the pad in place was all they were good for, they certainly didn't cover anything up!
Then they told me to get up and carefully walk around as much as I liked.
Here's a pic from the day following that, so two days post-op wangbar.plus. com /stylishpeebag.jpg
The hole from the surgical drain had a piece of tape over it and wept yellowish fluid steadily for about a week and a half.
There was a lot of blood over the next few days and I was changing the pads every couple of hours because they were soaking right through. I also had a padded absorbant square on the bed under my bum and on the first night managed to soak right through that too and into the bed :oops:
The bleeding gradually decreased over the next few days. I did a LOT of walking - they told me Walking Is Good. On the third or fourth day post-op, I was feeling pretty confident and sneaked off to the chippy down near Hammersmith underground 'cos I was fed up of the food! (about 700 yards walk) That was a rash thing to do and I realised halfway there that it was further than it seemed and took a lot longer when I was taking careful steps of about 6 inches. Oh well, I made it there and back and it was well worth it.
Five days after the op, bleeding from inside seemed to have largely stopped. They came round and took out my catheter and internal packing and I had to do my first dilation. I had been too squeamish to look at myself until now so this was the first sight of my new vulva. It was pretty scary looking, very swollen and a lot more purple than it looks in these pics because I had to brighten them a bit. wangbar.plus. com /purplepussy.jpg
You can see that the swelling is pretty extreme and some of the vertical stitches are so strained that they have pulled open and torn a bit. Watery blood seeped from those seams for several weeks, long after any internal bleeding had completely stopped. That purple flesh was very taught and felt like a plastic bag! Although it looks very sore, I was so utterly numb down there from cut nerves/surgical shock that it was like touching another person. That numbness lasted many weeks, gradually receding. The vaginal entrance and the tip of the clitoris were the last to recover feeling.
Other girls have little trouble but for me the first dilation was awful. The smaller dilator went in ok and was only mildly uncomfortable but although only half a centimetre thicker, the second one was dreadfully painful and seemed as though it was simply not going to go in at all. I have a photo of the smaller one @ 2.5cm inserted wangbar.plus. com /smalldilation.jpg
After managing to insert the second one and keep it in for the specified 20 minutes I was SO grateful to be able to take it out. It also pulled at the outer lips and put more strain on the vertical stitches, making them bleed again. wangbar.plus. com /postdilation.jpg
The day after first dilation I was discharged and off home once I'd had a bowel movement.
Shortly before I left CX, the bruising came out all over my vulva and upper thighs and I looked like I was wearing dark blue French knickers!
Back home I settled into the painful and tedious routine of 3 dilations per day.
After each dilation I sat for a few minutes in a hot bath into which I had put a tablespoon of TCP
(btw Betadine is no longer available in the UK)
I also douched after each dilation, adding a few drops of TCP into the solution with an eye dropper.
CX do not make the recommendation that you do this, but it worked for me. I had absolutely no infections or problems of any kind and simply healed up. The hot baths most definitely helped the bruising on the thighs and abdomen to clear up quickly - there were times that I could actually see the edge of the bruise line receding, especially if I gently massaged it.
The stitches gradually dissolved and came out and a few weeks after getting home my full-frontal view looked like this wangbar.plus. com /earlyhealing.jpg
The little brown dot just to the left of the midline on the lower abdomen is the mark from where the surgical drain tube emerged.
I had some concerns at that time about some small areas of redness and took some close-ups to email to Iffy and Manjit (The SRS nurses) though it proved difficult to take a pic myself which clearly showed it.
The clitoris also caused me some concern because I could not clearly see where it was. wangbar.plus. com /lesshair5months.jpgwangbar.plus. com /pullopen5months.jpg
Visible in this photo at the very top is a hole - for many weeks I thought that this was where I was urinating from and that CX had got the layout totally wrong. Happily that was not the case. The hole slowly healed up over time and the clitoris was clearly visible
I was concerned that the larger dilator CX had supplied still wasn't large enough so bought the next two sizes 3.5 and 4cm from the CX supplier and gradually stretched to accomodate them.
I took some more pictures at 9 months post-op at which time I was still dilating every day. It may not have been necessary to do it so frequently, but I thought better safe than sorry.
At around this time I showed my vulva to my GP and she was very complimentary. I have dated a couple of lesbians who say that my appearance etc seem fine to them so since then I have been quite content. wangbar.plus. com /9monthpostop1.jpgwangbar.plus. com /9monthpostop2.jpg
I think that I have been very lucky in all respects.
I have five and three quarter inches depth, using a 4cm dilator, I can orgasm from the G-spot or the clitoris, I can multi orgasm, I do self lube given decent foreplay and whilst not totally ideal the cosmetic appearance seems to fall reasonably within the range of normal females. wangbar.plus. com /closeup9month.jpg
In this last pic, I was trying to show the urethra which does exit in the correct place, just above the vagina. Everything was a bit slippery though and it is extremely difficult to take decent photos of ones own bits whilst also holding the lips apart, so this has resulted in the vaginal entrance looking a bit more "bunched up" than it actually is normally.
I'm now 14 months post-op, Here's a view at 14 months so that you can assess how much scarring had faded and how things have progressed.
- I still have some redness in the introitus though it is looking worse here because this was taken by my g/f immediately after a vigorous sex.
(Nurse Iffy said that was slight granulation tissue and put some silver nitrate on it last week, so it's better now)wangbar.plus. com /14monthspostop.jpg
*edit* My pictures got removed, they apparently offended someone - I find that kind of puzzling.
They weren't immediately viewable, you had to click on a link to see them and it was perfectly obvious what they would show. If you're that sensitive or squeamish, why did you click on the link(s)
.......anyway, it doesn't matter to me at all, it's not my loss.
*edit* OK ..... I clarified the situation with Mods and put the pics back in without one-clickable links
*edit* Links removed again by Mods ..... although not now clickable, active links and I had asked for advice from Mods beforehand
, apparently I did it wrong again, broke the Rules and so have now been Warned. I've asked for advice AGAIN and if I can then restore them somehow I will *Edit* OK pics are back..... one last try. I have followed the instructions of Mods exactly so this time there should be no problem - if there is, then I give up