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[Zythyra]

I happen to be an activist. Not just for trans or lgb issues, but various things that are important to me. These sort of discussions crop up in other situations. Not everyone wants to be an activist. That's OK, you aren't required to be one. On the other hand, every small thing that each of us does in our own lives can make a difference in how trans people will be accepted in the future.

Some people are going to protest visibly, others might recycle and buy compact florescent light bulbs. It all makes a difference. Do your part in whatever way feels right for you.

y2g

[Claire de Lune]

I agree with Ell.

I am who I am, I am a 62 year old trans woman, and damned well proud of it.  No one appears to know or care nor does anyone give me a hard time and I don't give anyone else a hard time. Actually I get along with pretty well anyone. I am just a likable person. OK that's enough, my arm is getting sore trying to pat myself on the back. 

Cindy

Except being 62, that pretty much says it for me too.  Being stealth has a smell of mothballs associated with it and I just came out of the closet a few years ago.  It's not like I advertise that I'm TS.  I live a pretty ordinary life.  I'm a middle aged professional woman and that's how I present myself.  But I'm not ashamed of being a trans woman either.  No one has ever asked me but I wouldn't be embarrassed by it either.  I'm a quiet activist.  My job involves vocational rehab so I do some volunteer work helping other TG's find jobs.  I'm not real big on protest marches but I did join the protest outside of Nancy Pelosi's office (she's my Congresswoman) when the ENDA revisions were announced.  I do the pride parade too but that's for fun!  I go with friends in the Magic Johnson Aids Foundation.  I think the straight community considers us queer anyway so I proudly embrace that identity.

[ell]

The people in my life know who I am. That's as far as it needs to go for me. I'm just not looking for acceptance "as a transsexual" as the TransGENDERED Community seems to insist and want I do. There IS no TransSEXUAL Community - there are only individuals, mostly mainstream, who just happen to have changed their sex.

I used to view the Transgendered Community as an annoying, though harmless entity. More and more though I'm realizing it's my enemy, as ruthless, impersonal and agenda-driven as any right-wing religious group, determined to alienate me from the very Mainstream Society that I count as my home.

~Kate~

i don't understand this remark coming from a global moderator at Susan's.

on behalf of some very sweet people i know who are gender variant, i take great exception to this remark.

whether there is a Trans community or not, there is a Susan's community, and i think you've offended alot of the people in it. don't know if an apology is in order or not.

ok, you're a woman, not TS. we get that. still, you have spent lots of time at Susan's during your transition. you've received a lot of support from others here, and you yourself have helped alot of others.

unfortunately, as you have said, you were not born a female. no matter what surgeries you have to help present yourself to the world as a female, you will always know, in your heart, that you were born a boy. please remember that all gender variants have a very similar, heavy burden to bear.

for whatever reason, transsexualism has burst onto the stage around the world. it's probably not just a passing trend. it includes all kinds of gender variants. i see this as a very positive thing. it seems to me that lots of good will come of it.

there may not be much of a community now. maybe there never will be. but i have a feeling there will soon be alot more people who are transitioning or who identify as gender variant. these people have something in common with you: they're trying to find the courage to drag their lives out of the lost and found and finally start living.

-ell   

[Rachael]

i hate this old debate...
'u are trans thus u must embrace it and love it'
'be out and proud'
the belief that because you feel trans is a big part of you, doesnt mean it is for everyone.
a TS man or woman are not the same as a gender variant person, or a crossdresser, or a trasvestite. there is only one link between those, that is gender, not being TRANSgender, or that all share some lovely little club membership.
Transexual people CAN leave this behind, and not be obsessed with it being a part of thier personality, or important to them.
Yes the issues gender variant people face are important, and difficult, but they are different. and only gender variant people can truely understand them. I admit freely that i cant understand it.
Kate is right, the transgender community is its own worst enemy. a vicious cycle that traps and marginalises. there isnt a transexual community, there are men and women and the community community... REAL LIFE. not every transexual is in that, but a lot are. The trans community in its veil of acceptance and frilly friendlyness,  is nothing more than a smiling assasin.
You may feel you want to shout from the rooftops, gain accpetance, and help people understand you. Dont assume that its something that is required of people, or that more people being out would actually help... i dont think it would tbh...
I dont want aceptance, i dont need it, i recive it automatically as female, people have understood what i am for all of human kinds existance, woman. If you feel you need to explain that. well, dont expect me to need to also.
R

[Natasha]

i also believe that as people, we deserve the courtesy to state our opinions/views/feelings whether we are men, women, gender bender, global moderator, staff, non-staff, the president of the u.s., cleopatra queen of the nile or god.

[cindybc]

Hi Claire
Queer? Well I prefer weird, I'm use to that one. Well they are only just labels some people need to tell the tomatoes from the potatoes. Lesbian? Yes, although I would not have thought to labeling my partner and I that. I made the decision 5 years ago to seek a relation ship with another Trans woman. My soul mate and I have lived together now for going on 3 years, but it is intimacy that is the real cement in our relation ship. As far as sex goes, I have no interest in it, for reason's I prefer not to talk about.

The work I am working to start is very much like what you do. I am not afraid to go out in public I worked with people as a social worker for 20 years the last 7 years as Cindy, and the thought of going out to work among people doesn't bother me. Outside of working with Trans folks, I will also be working as part of the team for a local Renfest. So my mug being under public scrutiny is certainly an every day event and I love it. I may not be the prettiest woman to look at but people like me and that's all that maters. Being stuck indoors in a rocker knitting sweaters is not in my plans for growing older.

Cindy   

[Kate]

The people in my life know who I am. That's as far as it needs to go for me. I'm just not looking for acceptance "as a transsexual" as the TransGENDERED Community seems to insist and want I do. There IS no TransSEXUAL Community - there are only individuals, mostly mainstream, who just happen to have changed their sex.

I used to view the Transgendered Community as an annoying, though harmless entity. More and more though I'm realizing it's my enemy, as ruthless, impersonal and agenda-driven as any right-wing religious group, determined to alienate me from the very Mainstream Society that I count as my home.

~Kate~

i don't understand this remark coming from a global moderator at Susan's.

on behalf of some very sweet people i know who are gender variant, i take great exception to this remark.

whether there is a Trans community or not, there is a Susan's community, and i think you've offended alot of the people in it. don't know if an apology is in order or not.

Yes, an apology is warranted. I phrased that poorly and WAY too loosely. I do apologize.

I mentioned this in another thread (now deleted)... that the TG community I was referring to is the agenda-driven, political and organized effort to legally and socially classify people who change their sex as "transsexuals," as a special and separate third gender.

I DIDN'T mean the informal "community" of TGs overall, either here or in general, or the community of people in my life. My frustration and fear is only with the political wing aspect that I see as doing more harm than good... at LEAST for transsexuals who are just trying to blend in again.

I DO understand the need for legislation and whatnot to protect people who exist outside the gender binary or heterosexuality. But for someone who is doing everything she can to fit back INTO that binary, it doesn't make sense to include myself in that group. I'll *support* those efforts, but I don't want to be misrepresented... any more than an androgyne would want to be included in a group representing TSs. It's not bigotry, it's not "better than," it's just *inaccurate* and misleading.

My apologies to you and those whom I offended.

~Kate~

[cindybc]

Hi -ell hun
I consider myself as just me. I had my humble beginnings here on Susan's 7 years ago then I was off and busy living a productive life as a social worker. I was also involved in a couple other message boards for intuatives, but these boards for what ever reason appeared to just die off, like overnight practically. So here I am one day cleaning out my email box and "lo and behold" Susan's Transgender staring up at me like a big neon sign with all these colors and sparklies and all with a big red arrow pointing to it.  So here I am, back to my humble beginnings, but I am truly happy to be back here, my old home with many wonderful young adults young enough to be my kids. At least this is giving me purpose until I get set up her for my next job.
I'm really glad I came back because it's not what's in it for me, it is what can I contribute.

Cindy   

Posted on: January 01, 2008, 01:58:34 PMHi Kate, your apologies are accepted, I didn't really think you were like that. For me I haven't been on any teams after I left here 7 years ago, I was just me. In this board I am a trans woman looking to see where she can give some support where ever needed.

Cindy

[Nichole]

Okay, Kate.

I totally misjudged you as Nero said. I am sorry for that. I know that you meant your comments about no one here. I hope you'll forgive me.

N~

[Chris]

sigh. damn

we gotta remember we're family & we dont agree w/each other sometimes.  that's cool. everythin is cool. 

happy new year 2008!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vw6F3Sf-PGw
	LQ | HQ

[Pica Pica]

sometimes I worry.

[cindybc]

Awwwwwwwwwwwww, shucks, Cindy blushes, and here I didn't think I had any family.
Tanks Chris. Sending a telepathic kiss. "hee, hee, hee." 

Cindy

[Zythyra]

My apologies to you and those whom I offended.

~Kate~

Kate,

Thanks for your apology. I wasn't offended, we all have our opinions. I'd written a response to the now deleted other thread, however it got locked just at the time I tried to submit it. Oh well. Although we might live in different worlds, and don't always agree on everything, I often find your comments about life as Kate to be enlightening and inspirational in my own journey of discovery.

To me, one of the things that keeps me active in this community at Susan's is the real feeling of community here. I often learn more about myself by participating in discussions, and share about my own experiences in the hopes that it will help someone else not feel the isolation that I felt for so long.

Happy new years everyone!

zythyra

[cindybc]

Hi y2gender I do so agree with you and I did what I could to keep emotions from reaching escape velocity. And that other topic and it's creator have appeared to have taken a hike, thank goodness.

Cindy

[Pica Pica]

i must be blind, i never saw the seething emotions going on...
kate, your completely right, as a woman your revolution is to be as whole complete and happy as possible.