Oh geez.
Last night I had a dream that I was a biomale (or post transition) and that I was on a quest to get the perfect high heels for crossdressing. The dream was inspired by a crossdresser I know, who was wearing really cool high heels last Thursday. But seriously, he's not a transgirl, which was terribly disappointing for me because he also is attracted to biomales... which means he'd have nothing to do with me. It's so hard not to call him a she, he passes completely. But he has those transgirl/crossdresser qualities that for some reason I find really sexy. I know a lot of crossdressers and transgirls don't like their larger hands and feet, or the way their muscles tone, but I just find it beautiful. They don't look like men to me, not in the slightest, they look like a type of woman, and a type that I apparently really like.
I am still put off by them sexually, the same way I am put off by biomen; I envy the hell out of anyone that has a penis. Hopefully one day I can get over that, and respect transgirls who don't like their penises. I imagine that if their penis was not part of our sexual interaction, that I wouldn't feel so insecure. That's where my sexuality is at a sort of impasse. I am attracted to people who in their lifetime were "on T." Transgirls were on it for quite some time, then off it. They get this really fantastic look, of a foundation of T and then a polished finish of estrogen. I just don't know how to explain it... But I really love the result. On top of that, every transgirl I've known has had a heart of gold.
I don't even know what I'm trying to express, here. I don't think I'd want to be a crossdresser myself, but sometimes I find myself pining over bother male crossdressers and transgirls even though they're very different. But as I said before, there's also conflict in my mind. It's the one thing I can say I've very confused about.
Quote from: Elwood on September 20, 2008, 12:31:32 PM
Oh geez.
Last night I had a dream that I was a biomale (or post transition) and that I was on a quest to get the perfect high heels for crossdressing. The dream was inspired by a crossdresser I know, who was wearing really cool high heels last Thursday. But seriously, he's not a transgirl, which was terribly disappointing for me because he also is attracted to biomales... which means he'd have nothing to do with me. It's so hard not to call him a she, he passes completely. But he has those transgirl/crossdresser qualities that for some reason I find really sexy. I know a lot of crossdressers and transgirls don't like their larger hands and feet, or the way their muscles tone, but I just find it beautiful. They don't look like men to me, not in the slightest, they look like a type of woman, and a type that I apparently really like.
I am still put off by them sexually, the same way I am put off by biomen; I envy the hell out of anyone that has a penis. Hopefully one day I can get over that, and respect transgirls who don't like their penises. I imagine that if their penis was not part of our sexual interaction, that I wouldn't feel so insecure. That's where my sexuality is at a sort of impasse. I am attracted to people who in their lifetime were "on T." Transgirls were on it for quite some time, then off it. They get this really fantastic look, of a foundation of T and then a polished finish of estrogen. I just don't know how to explain it... But I really love the result. On top of that, every transgirl I've known has had a heart of gold.
I don't even know what I'm trying to express, here. I don't think I'd want to be a crossdresser myself, but sometimes I find myself pining over bother male crossdressers and transgirls even though they're very different. But as I said before, there's also conflict in my mind. It's the one thing I can say I've very confused about.
Just an observation here. It sounds like you idealize peeps with XY chromosomes. Nothing wrong with that. You may want to examine why though. And remember that many transgirls don't want to be desired for an accident suffered at birth.
Quote from: Nero on September 20, 2008, 02:01:50 PMJust an observation here. It sounds like you idealize peeps with XY chromosomes. Nothing wrong with that. You may want to examine why though. And remember that many transgirls don't want to be desired for an accident suffered at birth.
The observation doesn't make sense. I can't see their chromosomes.
Plus, I like biogirls too.
And I don't desire transgirls for their "accident." Me liking their features is the same as someone who likes a girl with big boobs or long legs. They look a certain way, transgirls. Even the ones that pass very well have special features that biogirls generally don't have.
Okay, it sounds as though you're in awe of people born male - bio men, transgirls, crossdressers...
Like I said, just an interesting observation. If it sounds like I was picking on you for it, I'm not meaning to, but you seem to put men on a pedestal like they're way out of your league or something and this post is interesting in light of that.
Not because they were born male. Once in a rare while I'll see bio women with similar features.
It's not that they're out of my league, it's that they have a penis and I don't.
Quote from: Elwood on September 20, 2008, 03:33:54 PM
Not because they were born male. Once in a rare while I'll see bio women with similar features.
It's not that they're out of my league, it's that they have a penis and I don't.
I know what you mean about the cross-dressers and the trans-girls and the particular features they have that most bio-women don't. I don't really find it attractive myself but on the other hand, FtMs who go through with T are more likely to be attractive to me for the same reason about looking a little different than bio-men.
However, them having the penis that you want; I can empathize 100% with you there.
Quote from: Phate on September 20, 2008, 04:06:14 PMHowever, them having the penis that you want; I can empathize 100% with you there.
Yeah. That's the feeling that really puts me in conflict. If I fall in love with a transgirl or a bio man, I'm somehow going to have to get over that. Heck, I know I want and will like anal. But my envy is so strong I might feel dysphoric when someone sticks a dick in me (fortunately, most transgirls wouldn't do that).
I'm with a bio-man right now and the first few years of our relationship this wasn't a problem, but the past few I've come to envy him for what he has, but also at the same time I pretty much feel awe-inspired by it and overcome with a feeling of want.
Sometimes I feel dysphoric during penetration, like you mentioned...it's strange, and I don't want that feeling but I cannot control it. It comes and goes, but it might be worse for you.
P.S.- Why does fire-fox underline dysphoric like it's misspelled ??? It IS a real word right?
I lived most of my life being only attracted to female-bodied people... until I realized that I was trans and not just a really butch lesbian. I took a chance and dated an intersexed girl, and while she wasn't quite the right one for me, I had no problem with the fact that she had been born and raised essentially male, and had a penis (though we never had sex). In the 2 months we dated, I noticed she was more feminine than most of the bio females I'd known and dated, and the attraction, physically, was the same. I did wonder if some of that was due to her being intersexed, though; she had latent ovaries and obviously part of her was biologically female.
At the end of that relationship, though, I met my wife, who is a bonafide mtf, and the most beautiful woman I've ever met. I had had very little sexual experience prior to meeting her, and doubted I could ever have sex with someone with a penis, but things do change, and sometimes we're wrong about what we do and don't like. We've been married almost 2 years now, and our sexual relationship is great, despite our parts being incongruent with our genders. I find myself now far more attracted to transwomen than ever before, and I attribute that to my affection toward my wife. People change, and you must remember, it's only a penis. It's just anatomy. A penis makes a woman no less a woman than a vagina makes a man less of a man.
SD
I do get that... but dysphoria is a very painful feeling. This morning I got nauseous because of what my female parts were doing (in short; moistness).
Quote from: Elwood on September 21, 2008, 06:36:19 PM
I do get that... but dysphoria is a very painful feeling. This morning I got nauseous because of what my female parts were doing (in short; moistness).
Dude, for the longest time I didn't even know that some people aren't always moist. I always have something going on down there. :icon_omfg: :( :( :(
Edit: Sorry for the TMI and off topicness.
But yeah, on topic: I'm attracted to alot of different people. cigirls, bioguys, trans, crossdressers, intersexed alike. There's too much beauty in the world to be limited by gender. ;D
I know I have some very definite skeletal leftovers (face structure, etc) of my male bodied past, and I wish I didn't have those. Still, it's refreshing to know that some people think them attractive, even if I don't. (Incidentally, I'm dating a woman who says she doesn't even
see them!)
Quote from: Phate on September 20, 2008, 04:33:30 PMWhy does fire-fox underline dysphoric like it's misspelled ??? It IS a real word right?
Firefox underlines a *lot* of real words. :P I just right-click -> add to dictionary.
*sigh* I think Nero landed on something important. If I told you, Elwood, that I found you attractive because your girl-ish features were a sight better than most "male" features I have seen would you enjoy the comparison?
I am who I am and my features are not the way I would wish them to have been had I had a choice about chromosomal make-up. Although, I suppose since we derive genes from two parents and endless grandparents there is some possibility that I look right now the way I might have looked with overies providing E over my lifetime instead of a needle providing it for the past few years.
We all want to be thought of in some fashion as attractive whether it's for looks, mind, ability, whatever. But some aspects of what others might find attractive about us, perhaps we are not so inclined to feel are attractive ourselves. Just diff'rent strokes, I suppose. But to tell me you find me attractive for a certain "maleness" in my looks will probably win you no favors from me IRL.
That's not a diss toward you, nor is it a complaint about what you find attractive. It was simply an observation based on what Nero had written.
Nichole
One of the things that people tell me when they are trying to talk me into watching TV is that 'there a lot of funny stuff on." And I tell them that all they have to do is stand where they are and watch real people and its nothing but funny stuff.
Young people can wait to get old so they can spend all sort of time and money proving they are young.
Sigh. But it is very funny.
Quote from: Nichole on September 22, 2008, 01:29:02 PM*sigh* I think Nero landed on something important. If I told you, Elwood, that I found you attractive because your girl-ish features were a sight better than most "male" features I have seen would you enjoy the comparison?
I am who I am and my features are not the way I would wish them to have been had I had a choice about chromosomal make-up. Although, I suppose since we derive genes from two parents and endless grandparents there is some possibility that I look right now the way I might have looked with overies providing E over my lifetime instead of a needle providing it for the past few years.
We all want to be thought of in some fashion as attractive whether it's for looks, mind, ability, whatever. But some aspects of what others might find attractive about us, perhaps we are not so inclined to feel are attractive ourselves. Just diff'rent strokes, I suppose. But to tell me you find me attractive for a certain "maleness" in my looks will probably win you no favors from me IRL.
That's not a diss toward you, nor is it a complaint about what you find attractive. It was simply an observation based on what Nero had written.
Nichole
The difference is, what I find attractive about transgirls I find attractive in a feminine way. It doesn't come off as "boy-ish" to me at all.
All women are beautiful to me!