Activism and Politics > Discrimination

Wish I hadn't gone out

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ki1977:
Hey,

I was a little reluctant to post this..mainly cause I felt a bit silly.

I went out a few weeks back to celebrate my partners birthday, the night was really good and I felt confident being out and using the male toilets etc . We finished the night in a local lgbt bar, within 10 minutes of being there a woman came up to me saying "your not a real man". I'm living in the same area as I was pre-t so it is possible that she knew me from before. I was with a large group of friends and we all decided it was best to leave. The woman was waiting outside and shouted "show me your chest". She didn't use that term, but am sure you know what I mean. She then hit me across the head and grabbed my private area shouting something that I wouldn't like to repeat on the forum. Her friend grabbed her and luckily knoweone got hurt and we ran off. Since starting T I have found it really hard to cry. However, that night I didn't stop. The following day I made a you tube video. which I felt helped me get it off my chest. However, I keep finding myself cringing at the thought of her touching my private area. Whenever I get a negative comment/message through my you tube channel I usually just brush it off and put it down to lack of understanding. But, I really cant get the thought of her touching me out of my mind. She didn't touch my skin and I almost feel stupid for thinking this way. Sorry for posting this, but thought this be a good place to share.

Shantel:
I'm sorry that you had to endure such a horrible experience. Me being an MtF with a type-A chloric personality makes it easy for me to say that she should have had her ass kicked right then and there. However, that kind of behavior is not only uncalled for in today's society, but in many places is illegal. Anyone touching your body in an unwanted and aggressive manner is assault. Her touching your breasts or crotch makes it a sexual assault. You have my warmest sympathy sweetie, do discuss it a lot among your friends that you hang out with and all of you come up with a plan of how you will respond to this type of encounter as a group should it happen again in the future. Continue to be you and be happy with who you wish to be and practice projecting that image to build up self confidence. ((Hugs))

ki1977:
thank you.....I haven't expressed to any of my friends or my partner how I feel, but I think it's a good idea that I do.

And thanks so much for sharing your experience. I didn't report it either, at the time I think I was in shock. I completely agree with the humiliation part, I think that word really sums up how I feel.

Shantel:

--- Quote from: Renee D on March 04, 2012, 11:51:05 am --- there are no protections for trans people where I live and I'm sure dealing with the local law enforcement on something like that would be even more humiliating for me, so I didn't pursue any charges. Plus, I think a lot of people think its funny to grab a trans person in the crotch area to "make sure."  Its like they disregard us as fellow humans.


--- End quote ---
Unfortunately Renee a lot of genetic females allow the gropers and the rapists to get away with their crap because they fear any further humiliation dealing with the authorities, the baddies bank on it. If you are FtM you will have to become more assertive and refuse to cringe and hide. This is an ugly society we live in, it's getting worse with increased population density. You may not like me for saying this, but you will have to man up mentally so that next time someone pulls that on you that you will see it through and watch them get terminated, it would serve them right! I hate bullies!

Shantel:

--- Quote from: Renee D on March 04, 2012, 12:22:26 pm ---I'm mtf, I haven't put my gender on here since I reached 15 posts.

And it was a customer in the store where I work as a clerk.

--- End quote ---

DUH what do I know???  :icon_bunch:

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