How do you guys ask for a haircut?

[Lukas-H]

So I had a bit of a debacle getting a haircut today. I didn't want to be mean to the lady so I left, but I got convinced to go back and got what I wanted the second time around.

I really can't tell the people around here that I want a 'haircut like a guy' cause it's kind of a small town and I'm not out, but if I were to get one somewhere else, what might I say?

Would I say, I want you to cut it like a guy, or just say something like 'short on the back and sides, and in the front' etc?

I don't know how to do these things

[Cameron James]

My hairdresser is really cool so I just brought her a picture of what I wanted - and it was a guy, and she cut it and said she loved it on me. But I go to a rock'n'roll indie sort of salon, so I've got a lot of leeway when it comes to that sort of stuff.

Since, I'm assuming that your place isn't like mine - I'd suggest asking for a pixie cut. While it's feminine, it'll get you closer to the style that you're looking for and would give the stylist a better idea of what you want. Hallie Berry had a very nice pixie for a while that when styled correctly turns into a nice looking men's cut.

[Alex201]

I just walked right in, picked up a mens haircut book, found a picture and told them that's what I want.

[xAndrewx]

When my mom was around a few years ago and I wasn't out to her I usually just said I'm very masculine so I want a masculine cut. When they dug deeper I'd say "I prefer men's styles" no one really pushed much after that. Bringing in a pic of a guy is also a good idea because there are some women who like men's cuts on them who do the same thing around here

[Elijah3291]

I will usually bring in a picture of a males haircut, and the guy looks obviously male, and his haircut is obviously masculine, i also remind my hairdresser that i want it to look 'as masculine as possible'

this usually gets the point across

also, I passed for my last haircut, so I just had to ask for a trim, and its actually the most masculine cut I have ever had.

[Devyn]

Print out the picture.
Take it to a hair salon.
"This is what I want. Don't f*** it up."


It doesn't work that way though when my mom takes me to my aunt's hair salon. I'll pick out a style and she'll go "NO THAT WON'T LOOK GOOD" and she gave me a PIXIE CUT. Not going there anymore. I don't go there a lot, actually.

[tekla]

Start by not going to a hairdresser, but go to a barber.

[Noah G.]

Start by not going to a hairdresser, but go to a barber.

I'm going to second this. Not only have I heard others state that they care less about whether you want a feminine or masculine haircut (upon reflection I have the same experience) but they also don't nitpick or say much of anything about your hair that doesn't have to do with the cut.

If you really want you could probably bring in a picture, personally I just try and explain what I want the best I can and I've yet to be disappointed. Sometimes they even surprise you and give you something extra that you really appreciate but don't actually ask for (last time I was in the barber cleaned up my hairline and made it more masculine when I didn't even mention my hairline -- I never do).

[spacepilot]

Well... I'm pretty direct with whoever is cutting my hair that day haha. I just go to supercuts, it's only $15, and 9 times out of 10 it works out great.

I tell them I "basically just want a boy's haircut", and to "cut it short on the sides, leave the top a little longer, and leave the pieces in front of my ears but trim them a bit." Sometimes I'm more specific with razor numbers depending on what I'm looking for- for instance the sides are usually a 5, and they clean up my neck with a 2. The top they just use a scissor for because I like it really textured and messy.

I find if you refer to the result you want as a "boy's cut" it lightens the mood and they just assume you're mimicking a guy but not trying to pass as one. Saying it to them that way makes me feel less masculine for the 20 minutes I'm in there, but for a nicer looking cut it's a trade I'm willing to make.

[tekla]

that's 'Short back and sides' in barber talk.

[Nygeel]

I'm also on board for the "see a barber not a hair stylist." The only times I've gotten what I wanted was when I went to a barber shop instead of a hair salon or a stylist.

[Dominick_81]

I've gone twice to wall mart to have it cut and I go with my cousins. I just bring a pic in and they cut it like the pic and it's a male pic.

Would I say, I want you to cut it like a guy, or just say something like 'short on the back and sides, and in the front' etc

You can tell them whatever you feel comfortable saying. I would think they wouldn't care if you wanted your hair cut like a boy. The first lady that cut my hair said women come in all time wanting their hair cut like a guy. This lady didn't know I was trans, but she didn't care at all, neither did the 2nd lady who cut my hair.

[Kohitsu]

I live in a small, very conservative town. I went to my town's hair stylist. Confidence is key. Even though I didn't pass as a male to my hairdresser, my first time upon going in with my brother, I asked her, "I want the sides and back short, long on top, and straight sideburns." She says to me, "Oh, you want a boy's cut?" I pointed to my brother and asked to have my hair cut like his. And she cut it exactly the way I wanted. Now I go in and she knows how I like it cut, so all I have to tell her is "the usual" or "boy's/men's traditional cut please". Just be firm about how you want your hair cut, don't let them do it the way they want to, it is your hair afterall and you're paying for it. Maybe bringing a male friend/sibling with you will help too.

[Devlyn]

Watch the barber shop scene in "Gran Torino". Don't try it, just watch. Seriously, use a barber, not a salon. Just ask for a trim and you'll get manned up and have a better idea of what to ask for next time. Don't panic about the neck shave, you'll bleed out before you even know he got you!

[PixieBoy]

I have only dared to ask for a men's cut once (too shy, I also falsely believed that I was percieved as male by the lady who cut my hair the previous times), and I simply said: "Give me a men's cut please, something that's super easy to maintain and still looks good."

[Battle_On]

I just bring in pictures and my stylist does it for me.  She has never said anything about it and the first time I remember being really nervous, but when I handed her the picture got really excited. She has always done a really good job, but I don't go for the more normal cuts.

[emil]

round here the stylist will introduce himself/herself and shake your hand,....so i just introduce myself with a random common unambiguous male name that leaves no doubt i must be a boy. it will usually result in a better cut if they think you're a guy, because there are lots of women who ask for masculine haircuts but they mostly actually walk out with a prettied-up female version of it.

[RachelH]

Well unfortunately been a lad, and been in the armed forces I usually would have said "2" back and sides and trimmed on top! That was uk speech don't know if you guys have the same trimmer lengths... but generally ask for simple styles. I have never in my life asked for overly complicated styles... hmmm except once when I got into high lights... maybe a sign that I wanted to experiment, especially seen I loved spending the time talking and been in a hair dressers?! 
There are not many lads that would take pictures into hairdressers and say that, generally know exactly what you want and say it with conviction like you have always wanted it. With everyone I knew it was making things as quick and simple, basically everything male. Shopping for me would be surgical strikes; I knew what I needed and where it was, all my shopping was done in 1 hour at the most!
There are huge exceptions but generally boys try to avoid the intimacy that comes from girls shopping and hair styles. Keep it simple and quick and know what you want before you go, that is the most convincing. Especially while I was growing up and still today!

[Lukas-H]

Thanks for the replies.

To everyone who said go to a barber, there isn't one in my town and I don't have the means to drive out of my way for a barber :/

I'm like Kohdy, I live in a small conservative town, there are no barbers here. Before I got the touch-up done she was with someone else, a guy who wanted a trim. I assume she did his hair before. It looked perfectly fine.

I don't understand why everyone is saying go to a barber, unless you're saying it just because you figure he won't ask questions or be weird?

[Nygeel]

I don't understand why everyone is saying go to a barber, unless you're saying it just because you figure he won't ask questions or be weird?

The reason why I said go to a barber was based on a few personal experiences. I've been to both hair salons/stylists and barber shops. When I go to a salon or stylist and ask for a cut it's usually cut in a way to look more feminine where as with a barber shop all they do is men's cuts so the cut is always masculine. This has been a problem when I had hair longer than mine is now.