Author Topic: Non-Binary Introductions  (Read 157797 times)

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Offline Bon Bon

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #960 on: December 10, 2018, 12:19:38 pm »
Hi I'm Bon Bon, i'm a 24 year old ftm nonbinary dude... i'm severly socially anixous but trying real hard! i like video games, cartoons, animation and a bunch of things. and just trying to get better in touch with the comuunity and answers i suppose +A+"  so hello!

Offline Tessa James

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #961 on: December 12, 2018, 05:45:44 pm »
Hey Bon Bon,

Welcome to the far side!  Way cool that you are reaching out tho you deal with the social anxiety stuff.  Good on ya as our Aussie friends say.  I am gona bet you have a lot in common with others here who seem to share your interests.

thanks for dropping bi and saying Hi!
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013

Offline dima

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #962 on: December 16, 2018, 02:07:36 pm »
I understend that I was not binary when I learned about the existence of a gender scale, I was always attracted by the trans theme, but the cis-gender transition did not seem attractive to me
I would like a hrt without a chest or small chest :) and ffs
socially I don’t really want a transition but maybe my opinion will change

Offline Tessa James

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #963 on: December 17, 2018, 10:45:23 pm »
Welcome Dima!

We have creative visions and dreams that inspire.  We often have clear desires and specific ideas of how we hope a transition might turn out.  We don't have a real map or any guarantees, however.  We are drawn to this journey.

It still starts with taking steps toward self acceptance and an authentic life.  All the best dear Dima in realizing your dreams.
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013

Offline Artistic_Gene

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #964 on: December 25, 2018, 02:21:55 pm »
You and we other enby folks have so many more options outside of the lines and outside of the box.  How is your relationship with the rest of the queer world now?  I find it interesting to be so outside many other realms and part of a growing awareness that gender is an individual experience.  Each of us unique in expression and form.  See ya round

I find it odd because I'll often hear "the binary is the bad thing" but then see "you must adhere to the binary to be valid!" at the same time from folks anywhere on the gender spectrum. It's confusing to be honest.

For me personally, gender is so beyond anything we have limited it to and it's beyond any sets of behaviors or ideas. It's a feeling, like how we know we are meat popsicles or how we know whether we are artists, architects, doctors, etc. It can't be explained except we know it to be true to ourselves. That's where my gender is: those amorphous feelings that lead you to who you are. That's how I experience it, anyway—I hope that made some sense.

And you're right, the binary is for Barbie and Ken. It doesn't reflect reality and it's leftovers of the patriarchy as well as colonialist implications.
Copious lukewarm cucumbers for a brain

Offline Tessa James

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #965 on: January 02, 2019, 06:30:51 pm »
Hey Gene,

What a trip!  Yes, being enby can mess with some folks and their insistence on simple formulas.  We have heard that people who are trans and lean toward female are "all women" and people who are trans and are more male are "all men".
We go through an endless series of games and memories to validate our safe place in a largely binary gendered world.  Some of my friends and acquaintances suggest i muddy the waters by expressing a non binary perspective.  Apparently it is difficult for some folks to envision diversity even within our community.

It seems to me that when we are early in our transition and info gathering we may wish a strong identification with the group when being transgender may be all that we have in common.  We have little to prove and more to gain from just being free to be ourselves.
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013

Offline Holden

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #966 on: January 08, 2019, 11:58:36 am »
Hiya cuties! I'm a trans*masculine (he/they pronouns) and very new here. :)

I was assigned female at birth and started testosterone about 5(?) years ago and have had top surgery. I used to identify as genderqueer but have stayed with trans* and non-binary for awhile. I have a relatively normative masculine presentation (to my dismay sometimes), so most of the people around me just use he/him pronouns, but I feel definitively non-binary. Sometimes I feel sad that I've lost aspects of my femaleness with hormone therapy, but it's all relative and I'm much happier now than I was a few years ago even.

Anyway, nice to meet you all! <3

Offline Tessa James

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #967 on: January 09, 2019, 02:58:26 pm »
Hello Holden,

How very good of you to stop by and introduce yourself.  Many of us consider our transition to have started when we "came out" or started HRT.  Some of us also recognize a much longer social transition that may be life long.  I felt betrayed by my body during puberty and desperately tried to be some kind of boy/man thing.  As that continued to fail I tried to find transition help in the 90s and failed then too.  I have more consistently moved toward androgyny while being queer.  Currently non binary fits me best although the term is insufficient and contains a negative connotation.  We can clearly see that new definitions are being created every day and I look forward to that.

I think many of us are in the zone, range or place of fluidity.  For some there is a spectrum and I often feel an amalgam with a unique gender that contains elements of all of them!  We may readily know what its like to be seen as male or female. 

I have met a number of trans masculine people who miss some sense of identity or engagement with the lesbian and feminist world.  One friend describes feeling like a butch warrior and then after transition going on to being just another guy with less of a group identity.

How about you?  That "much happier" part of your life sure makes sense from here but we pay a price eh?
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013

Offline SamuraiMonkey

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #968 on: February 25, 2019, 11:00:25 pm »
Hi, I'm Alexandria, I identify as non-binary and a transwoman. I'm pre-transition right now technically only on finasteride for hair loss. Hope to start pellet implants soon.

I like art, music, cooking, working on cars/trucks/motorcycles, and having fun with family and friends.

My pronouns are they/them and she/her. I started coming out September 2017, found a gender therapist in November of that year.

I first came out as genderfluid, but over time I've found myself drawn more towards my femme side. I still identify as non-binary because it's just a feeling I've had for many years. I'm in my mid 30s.

Offline Tessa James

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #969 on: February 26, 2019, 10:55:52 am »
Good morning and welcome SamuraiMonkey,

Congratulations on your evolving sense of feeling about gender and identity.  Many of us do advocate for and have benefitted from the assistance of an experienced gender therapist.   

I hope you will share more with us about whats going on and take the opportunity to look around, read a bit and ask questions.  Nice to come in outta the cold?

Good to hear you are still having fun along the way too.  See ya round the Place.
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013

Offline thornbird11

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #970 on: June 15, 2019, 11:29:28 am »
Hello, my name is Mim. I am an enby/androgyne, but was born as a girl. I have a strong masculine side that I released now finally after years of suppression. I got bullied for wanting to be a boy when I was a child. So I decided, that I should stick to being a girl and suppressed my masculine side. This all changed in 2017 when I met a bigender person and learnt about non-binary gender identities. I found out that I feel like a combination of both, male and female. I dress quite androgynous and recently cut my long hair short. I didn't come out as an enby yet, though. My family is very religious and conservative. They already had a hard time with me coming out as a panseuxal. So what will they say when they learn that I am not a cis person? They don't even know what cis or non-binary means. So, I hope that I can find some help here with my coming out and also help others with my experiences. 
"Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me."
(Carol Burnett)

Offline Tessa James

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #971 on: June 15, 2019, 02:06:24 pm »
Hello, my name is Mim. I am an enby/androgyne, but was born as a girl. I have a strong masculine side that I released now finally after years of suppression. I got bullied for wanting to be a boy when I was a child. So I decided, that I should stick to being a girl and suppressed my masculine side. This all changed in 2017 when I met a bigender person and learnt about non-binary gender identities. I found out that I feel like a combination of both, male and female. I dress quite androgynous and recently cut my long hair short. I didn't come out as an enby yet, though. My family is very religious and conservative. They already had a hard time with me coming out as a panseuxal. So what will they say when they learn that I am not a cis person? They don't even know what cis or non-binary means. So, I hope that I can find some help here with my coming out and also help others with my experiences.

Hello and Welcome Mim,  So good to welcome an international person and voice to these pages.  We need perspectives from people around the world.  You are among the fastest growing group of people "coming-out" in the transgender community.  Like you, many of us had never known of a non binary gender identity or person in real life.  We have had the real time experience of a life, like yours, that defies the two simple boxes of pink and blue.  I love being out and free to simply be myself.

Many of us realize gender is a social construct and the easy simple labels can be a hindrance to really understanding ourselves and how people really feel.  Your learning, knowledge and self acceptance may be the critical keys to opening the doors to self liberation.  Our body does not define us but is merely the vessel of our character and personhood.  Who and how we love is up to us to celebrate and I believe anyone who really loves us wants to know us as our true and free selves.

Religious intolerance and even hatred are the products of ignorance and fear.  We need not let that decide our lives.  Live well and free my new friend.  Your life, your future and with you the one to please.
Open, out and evolving queer trans person forever with HRT support since March 13, 2013

Offline thornbird11

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Re: Non-Binary Introductions
« Reply #972 on: June 15, 2019, 03:57:57 pm »
Hello and Welcome Mim,  So good to welcome an international person and voice to these pages.  We need perspectives from people around the world.  You are among the fastest growing group of people "coming-out" in the transgender community.  Like you, many of us had never known of a non binary gender identity or person in real life.  We have had the real time experience of a life, like yours, that defies the two simple boxes of pink and blue.  I love being out and free to simply be myself.

Many of us realize gender is a social construct and the easy simple labels can be a hindrance to really understanding ourselves and how people really feel.  Your learning, knowledge and self acceptance may be the critical keys to opening the doors to self liberation.  Our body does not define us but is merely the vessel of our character and personhood.  Who and how we love is up to us to celebrate and I believe anyone who really loves us wants to know us as our true and free selves.

Religious intolerance and even hatred are the products of ignorance and fear.  We need not let that decide our lives.  Live well and free my new friend.  Your life, your future and with you the one to please.

Thank you for welcoming me, Tessa. It's great that I found this forums and I hope to meet some like-minded people here. You are right. I am not a religious person, mainly because I am against intolerance and hatred. So many terrible things happened and still happen in the name of God and I really don't wanna be a part of that. But my family is - unfortunately.

I hope that with the help of this forums I'll find out more about myself and my gender identity. It's still so new to me and I know so little. I am curious to learn from the experience of the other people here. Of course, if I can help others anyhow I'd be happy to do that as well.
"Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me."
(Carol Burnett)