Of all the things I've had the pleasure of testing the waters of, Caffeine happens to be a strong vice grip for me. I didn't get into weed, beer stirred up my acid reflux, and cigarettes I enjoyed for pleasure but had to give up when asthma came into the picture. For these things when it was time to stop. I could...stop. Then Starbucks came into the picture. My first taste was pleasurable, and I craved it a bit more. I found it to be a good compliment with my love for chocolate. As a few more years past I remember vowing to my doctor I was stop with drinking caffeine because it was affecting my nervous system and heart.
I stopped for maybe a month. Then the craving came back. It always started with a small piece of chocolate. One day...two days...etc. Then it became troublesome when I blew quite a bit on it. Then slowly coffee crept back in. The effects are very noticeable. Motor problems, racing mind, and then the depressive crash afterwards. It really didn't hit me till this year when I started to eliminate more subtle addictions with ease and then I hit the brick wall. "Hmm...I seem to can't stop drinking coffee...Now I know something is wrong."
The effects I get: Energy, a strange feeling of...status, the pleasure of the taste
Negative effects: Facial twitching, inability to control my arms and other various muscle contractions, elevated heart rate, then the usual effects of a crash( depression and end thoughts)
What cause the trouble with quitting? It's my reward for doing the best I can. It's a time to get the pleasure of something sweet since I started changing alot of my diet over the years. It's a sense of deserving. I quite drinking soda quite a long time ago, don't eat regular sweets often if at all, I exercise more, meditate and pretty much cut out a lot. So somewhere it says "ATLEAST keep this one thing!!" I've even tried to excuse this by upping my water to flush the coffee so it doesn't linger, but realistically things just don't work like that. And where I'm at now in this is finding some kind of way to just stop. To say no to this thing that craves these stimulants. Because if I keep going on like this my heart can get disturbed, I can run a high risk of diabetes, and my nervous system may try to unlock something latent that can affect me in the long run.
Anyone else here have this problem? I did notice an older post about this, but I did decide to make a newer one.