Community Conversation > Transgender talk

Great Day

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Jillieann Rose:
I had the most wonderful day, yesterday.
Was looking in the mirror after shaving and got the craziest idea.
So first I put on a little foundation on my face and neck.
Some blush on my cheeks and than I took a pencil and darken my eyebrows.
My eyelashes are already dark and long so I left them alone.
I put on some lipstick and a set of fake nails; my nails are still too short.
After putting a little padding, a white pullover, a pink sweater, my white ladies jeans,  teen shoes, a pair of small gold earrings, my wife’s light weight winter coat and a light blue stocking hat I got into the car and headed for the mall. When I got to the mall I grabbed my purse, which I had put my wallet and other things, and walked into. At that moment I almost had a panic attack, but I was so determined to wall around the mall a couple of time no matter what anyone might think. I know how to talk, walk and act like a woman, I grew up with two sisters.
After ten minutes of walking without looking at anyone and my head down, I began to peek at people I was passing. No one seemed to notice me. I got a little braver and began looking at people as I pass them, they would glance at me and than look away just like they always do when I’m dressed as a man. Then my nose started to run. I had forgot to put an tissue in my purse so head for the bathrooms. I knew I couldn’t go into the men’s so hurried into the woman’s and pass a couple of ladies and got into a stall.  Took care of my problem and than I when the bathroom sounded empty went to a mirror to check my makeup. Two women came in looked at me as the passed by and went into a couple of stalls without giving me a second glance.
I was in heaven.  :icon_joy:
I realized that I was being accepted as the woman I am. Finally I could be my true self; a woman, in her environment, shopping in a mall.
After that I held my head up, smile at the children waiting for Santa, look everyone in the face and for the next two hours I walked and shopped in the stores.
I checked out the ladies dresses at Sears, shoes at Payless, and some bras and makeup at the Target store.
Not wanting this to end I went to Myers and shopped for a gift for my SO. She loves cloths and jewelry. But I had one small problem. I realized I couldn’t use my credit card, my name and ID would be wrong.
Anyway it was a great day and I will do it again. Next time I will have more cash in my purse.
I hope this will encourage someone.

Good for you Jillieann,

I'm sure you had a wonderful time. You could use your credit card though. Women use their husbands credit cards all the time. Why would thay assume you to be different. They probably wouldn't have even asked to see your ID as long as the card is signed on the back. Try it next time. If they ask for your ID don't sweat it. Before I got my new name and DL I had occasion  to have to show my ID. No one ever gave me a problem. I'd even make a joke about the picture.. I know it sounds scary to do that but it's scary going out in public the first time too. And now you've done that and are ready to go again.

You ought to make an appointment to have your nails done when you go out again. That is a lot of fun. It's a whole new ballgame once you've been out in public. Be careful though some folks can be cruel if they make you. If someone does just keep your cool and ignore them if possible.

I'm really happy for you that you got up the courage to do it and had such a good time.


Jillieann Rose:
It is a scary but exciting new world out there for me and I'm glad you are here to help.
I do see life as a adventure. And thanks for the warning.
Our own attuides are what make us or break us. When I was at the mall I new who I was and ever one say the real woman inside.

Okay next time I will use the credit card and see what happens.
I also like your idea of getting my nails done. They really could use some professional care after all the years of neglect.

Thanks for your advise.

Hey there.

It is a great feeling going out like that isn't it.  You experienced many of the feelings that we all did we we made out first forays into the wild :)  The mall is definitely one of the best locations for your first time out. and especially at this time of year.  Many people are preoccupied with shopping to even worry about who is walking passed them.  In the crush of people many are more concerned on getting in and getting out.

One thing on malls be careful not to put yourself into a position where you are the only person in certain areas and the only person for people to look at.  For example coming down an escalator by yourself is like making a grand entrance and all eye's will be on you.  It doesn't happen all the time but just a little tip to keep in the back of your mind.  Busy is best until you become more confident.  Hopefully your next time out will be as enjoyable as this one.

Chat later,


Glad to hear that you had a good experience on your trip out.  It is important that you dressed to fit in.  The other day my wife and I were at a large mall.  Of the thousands of people we passed, I noticed exactly seven women wearing skirts or dresses (at least I think they were women--either that or they passed really well).  Most people wear jeans to the mall--particularly this time of the year.  Here in the Kansas City area we have had cool weather and several inches of snow on the ground.

The first time I went out in public dressed en femme I had a similar experience.  It was summer and I visited an art museum and walked around the Country Club Plaza in KC.  It was an experience I will never forget as I am sure yours will be.


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