Author Topic: Heyho everyone~  (Read 818 times)

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Offline -May-

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Heyho everyone~
« on: September 06, 2015, 05:14:10 am »
About me
I am May and 17 years old. I am from germany so please don't mind my horrible english x.x
I am a Transgirl, in therapy for a few months now and trying my best to get the approval for HRT.

I have always been shy and introverted, I never really had any friends outside of the internet but it's fine~

I like to draw, play the piano and watch romance movies or animes... or books or anything I love romance o3o

I came out to my sister and my parents in march after hiding my feelings from them for basically all of my life.
I always knew I want to be a girl and I really hope I can make that wish come true.

The little story of an unimportant girl
I was born in august 1998 as the third child, and unfortunately the second son, of my homo- and transphobic parents.

My parents tried their best to beat the feminine behaviour out of me from start on. They wanted me to become as manly as possible basically.
They yelled at me for crying. They forced me to play with boy things. They hit me when I wore my sisters clothes.
I was scared of being who I really am since I was scared of being bullied or beat up again. So I ignored my feelings and lived my life as a boy for the past 17 years.

Everybody saw something is bothering me. Everybody was asking me if I am okay all the time because I look so down.
But I couldn't tell anybody. I never had a friend or anybody I trusted to talk to. So I kept on hiding.

When puberty started I was on the edge to killing myself. I didn't want to see myself change more and more into someone I am not. I would rather be dead than a boy. I hated the sight of me in the mirror. I would cut my body to punish it for changing me into something I didn't want.
These things went on for years until I tried to poison myself to set and end to everything.
Well I am still alive. For the better.

I started to read a lot about transsexuality and I realised I am not alone and I saw people transitioning from masculine bodybuilders into beautiful women. I finally had something like hope in my life.

First step was to come out to my family, I just needed someone to talk to about my problems. I couldn't hide it anymore.
I told my sister first, I am so glad I did. She is supporting me in any way possible. She even helped me gather the courage to come out to my parents.
My parents, of course, hated the idea of having a transsexual child, and told me it is just a phase and I should ignore it. I told them a lot of times that I felt like that all my life but they didn't believe me, they still don't.

They don't care how I feel, they keep on calling me their son and calling me by my birth name.
They don't care if I tried to kill myself, they would rather have a dead son than a transdaughter.

But nothing can bring me down anymore. I have a direction in my life. I have a goal and a dream I am living for.
With the help of my sister I got an appointment at a therapist and I am sooo happy it won't be more than 1 year until I can finally get hormones.

So, that was the story of my life put short. -w-

I hope I can meet a lot of great people in these forums and cheer people up who are going through the worst of their life.

Life is our one, first, only and last chance to be who we really are.
Nothing is over until we die. And until we die, there is plenty of ways to change everything for the better and for the best.
There is no point in giving up.

~Thank you for reading all that~

Offline V M

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Re: Heyho everyone~
« Reply #1 on: September 06, 2015, 06:01:33 am »
Hi May  :icon_wave:

Welcome to Susan's  :)  Glad to have you here, you are among friends now so join on in the fun

Here's a few quick links to help you along

Please be sure to review

Things that you should read


The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS

- V M

Offline katrinaw

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Re: Heyho everyone~
« Reply #2 on: September 06, 2015, 08:16:28 am »
Big warm welcome to Susan's May

Lovely to have you with us...

I could wind my thoughts way back to when I was a kid and at 4 knew I was not a boy! but that's a whole big long story and today this is yours  8)

Your are certainly amongst many folks that have come from a very similar stories.... but what is good for you is that you are still young and have a bright future ahead of you. As afar as families go, some are considerate of gender issues, others are not... The fact you have come out is great, despite the fact that they say you'll grow out of it... My parents way back in the fifties were told by a family Dr that I would grow out of it... wrong, but I hid it for ever because it was unheard of, and I wanted to survive!

I love your last paragraph, so true!

Look forward to seeing you around the forum's

L Katy  :-*

Long term MTF in transition... HRT since ~ 2003...
Journey recommenced Sept 2015  :eusa_clap:... planning FT 2016  :eusa_pray:

Randomly changing 'Katy PIC's'

Live life, embrace life and love life xxx

Offline -May-

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Re: Heyho everyone~
« Reply #3 on: September 06, 2015, 09:03:29 am »
And thank you for the warm welcome Katy ^^

Everybody seems to be so nice in here, I am glad.
I hope I will manage to integrate myself. I really want to get to know you all a bit more >3<

Offline gennee

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Re: Heyho everyone~
« Reply #4 on: September 06, 2015, 05:36:27 pm »
A hearty welcome to Susan's, May. Congratulations on starting HRT.

Be who you are.
Make a difference by being a difference.   :)


Offline -May-

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Re: Heyho everyone~
« Reply #5 on: September 07, 2015, 04:28:16 pm »
I didn't start HRT yet, I wish I did >3<
Still have to wait for like 1 year, oh well, nothing to do but wait and dream -w-