Author Topic: Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?  (Read 1615 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline windlep

  • Newbie
  • **
  • Posts: 39
  • Reputation: +2/-0
Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?
« on: December 25, 2015, 01:50:06 pm »
Ignorance creates fear, which as Yoda said, is the path to the dark side. So I wonder if anyone has had the pleasure of changing a transphobic persons mind just by showing them trans people are just people?

Offline Laura_7

  • *****
  • Posts: 4,719
  • Reputation: +47/-0
Re: Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?
« Reply #1 on: December 25, 2015, 02:03:00 pm »
I like the biological explanation, as you said, telling people facts so they can accept...
telling there are differences in brains of men and women, fixed before birth, so a mismatch is possible...
that there are even substances known to generate a higher percentage of transgender people...
so its not a whim but how people feel, and its nobodys fault... neither an upbringing or whatever...

and that apart from being transgender its people wanting to life a live like everybody else...


*hugs*

Offline Kylo

  • Family
  • *****
  • Posts: 4,085
  • Reputation: +63/-0
  • Gender: Male
Re: Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?
« Reply #2 on: December 25, 2015, 02:36:29 pm »
I probably haven't that I know of, simply because I don't tend to make friends with people who are "phobic" of LGBT folks for obv reasons. I might have educated those who are already accepting a bit but who knows. Most people do not want to talk about it and without talk or communication of some kind there is no education.
"If the freedom of speech is taken away, then dumb and silent we may be led, like sheep to the slaughter."

Offline suzifrommd

  • Woman Wannabe
  • Family
  • *****
  • Posts: 9,504
  • Reputation: +234/-0
  • GCS 6.19.2014 Dr. Kathy Rumer
Re: Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?
« Reply #3 on: December 25, 2015, 03:57:40 pm »
Ignorance creates fear, which as Yoda said, is the path to the dark side. So I wonder if anyone has had the pleasure of changing a transphobic persons mind just by showing them trans people are just people?

Several times. I've gotten into a long winded discussions with people who have left long transphobic comments in response to pro-trans articles.

I usually question their assumptions. "How do you know trans people weren't born needing to transition?" "How can you be so sure that gender dysphoria doesn't exist?" "What makes you so sure that dysphoria is bearable?" Those sorts of questions. I don't try to prove them wrong, I make them examine their own certainty.
Have you read my short story The Eve of Triumph?

Offline Sydney_NYC

  • 46 MtF - NY/NJ, Kinky and Geeky, 6'5¼" Tall Redhead
  • *
  • Posts: 1,266
  • Reputation: +16/-0
  • Gender: Female
    • Tall Girl Sydney
Re: Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?
« Reply #4 on: December 26, 2015, 02:38:01 pm »
I had been able to change someone's opinion and that was my father in law. At first he didn't comment on it when I came out, then he said some things behind my back. He is not religious, he was really ignorant about it and had an initial bad opinion about it. My wife had some words with him about it and finally I did to. He thought I was turning her daughter into a lesbian. My wife has just come out to them as bisexual (she came out to herself in 2008.) I had a serious conversation about it and explained to him about being trans. I had known that he might have issue due to trauma his mother had given him. His mother wanted a daughter really bad and dresses him as a little girl till he was 7 (fighting with her that he wasn't a girl.) This was very helpful to me on explaining it, because for me it's like I was born a girl, but not only am I being dressed in the wrong gender, but parts of my body don't match. He slowly started to understand, but still questioned it but was at least pleasant to be around.

6 months later he and his wife came up to visit and saw me full time and doing well. We even went to the beach and my mother in law commented on how well I looked in a bathing suit. It was a really good trip and my mother in law (his wife) fully accepted it at this point, but he still had some issues. Unfortunately 5 months later, my mother in law was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. (We found out 2 days before Christmas.) My wife and I were back and forth between NJ and TN (where they lived.) On my last trip back before my mother in law passed away, he took me to the side and thanked me for being there. He told me that he was shocked on how real this transgender thing was when they visited. He apologized for all the negative things he ever said about me transitioning and he ended it in saying: "A father can never have too many daughters."

Once he realized that we are human being and real people he accepted it. Unfortunately it took a tragedy for him to fully realize it. I think he would have eventually, but me being there during his time of need sped that up.
Sydney



Born - 1970
Came Out To Self/Wife - Sept-21-2013
Started therapy - Oct-15-2013
Laser and Electrolysis - Oct-24-2013
HRT - Dec-12-2013
Full time - Mar-15-2014
Name change  - June-23-2014
GCS - Nov-2-2017 (Dr Rachel Bluebond-Langner)


Offline Ms Grace

  • Gendernaut
  • Family
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 11,776
  • Reputation: +215/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • Going boldly where no cis person has gone before!
    • Magellan
Re: Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?
« Reply #5 on: December 26, 2015, 03:29:48 pm »
Yes, I have changed someone's opinion. Mine.

Used to be that I knew I was a woman and wanted to be seen and accepted as such...but there was "no way" I was trans. Let's just say my opinion and understanding of trans people (despite spending two years trying to transition in my early 20s) was not very positive. Anyway, once I turned that $#%& around I was able to accept myself and others and transition.
Grace
----------------------------------------------
Transition 1.0 (Julie): HRT 1989-91
Self-denial: 1991-2013
Transition 2.0 (Grace): HRT June 24 2013
Full-time: March 24, 2014 :D

Offline JLT1

  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 1,916
  • Reputation: +86/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • Going to a meeting at work
Re: Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?
« Reply #6 on: December 26, 2015, 09:25:26 pm »
My neighbor to the north is a fundamental Christian.  A serious one.  But unlike most, he actually tries to live his life being charitable.  He had a real struggle for the first few months.  All I did was say hello, try to be myself and I mowed his lawn every couple weeks as he has allergies and gets messed up when he mows. 

At first, he wouldn't acknowledge me.  Then, he would look at me.  Then, a smile.  Then, the questions.  I had answers.Today, as I was shoveling snow, we just talked about life.  Two neighbors chatting.  After I was finished, I changed clothes as I was going shopping.  On my way to my car, he was outside shoveling by my car as a plow had gone by and plowed snow so I couldn't get out.  He didn't want me to have to shovel while dressed for a day at the mall. 

HE started talking again and asked if I had rescheduled my GCS surgery yet.  We talked again about things, transition and the problems I have trying to find a date.  After a few minutes he told to let him know as he was there to help when needed.

He accepts me as me.  That's pretty good

Hugs,

Jen
To move forward is to leave behind that which has become dear. It is a call into the wild, into becoming someone currently unknown to us. For most, it is a call too frightening and too challenging to heed. For some, it is a call to be more than we were capable of being, both now and in the future.

Offline Stevi

  • *
  • Posts: 473
  • Reputation: +4/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: Have you ever changed the mind of a transphobic person?
« Reply #7 on: December 27, 2015, 08:49:48 am »
As shown by a couple of examples above, there are some fundamentally good people who are operating with the wrong set of "facts".  They are making their judgments base on those "facts".   When they get more complete information and true facts, they adjust their opinions and behavior accordingly.  Goes to show that education, sometimes, simply by example, goes a long way.

Stephanie

Tags: