Author Topic: Thinking out loud  (Read 12145 times)

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Offline Dena

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #160 on: October 14, 2017, 10:38:45 am »
If you feel you are gender fluid then something like 20% male, 80% female with social or body (appearance) dysphoria might best describe you(adjust the numbers as needed). I often see this with the FTMs however as their transition progresses and they  discover how comfortable they are in the new role, the percentages shift to favor the new role.

It's not important to have a label that describes you however sometimes it's needed when you are attempting to get your thoughts across to your therapist in terms that they understand.

In addition, I have seen others on the site much like you who put a high priority on FFS and a low or no priority on bottom surgery. It just shows how variety there is in the transgender family.
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Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #161 on: October 15, 2017, 06:30:33 am »
Yes that makes sense  and is very accurate  I will implement  this to help my therapist
and myself in our conversations thank you 😊 
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Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #162 on: October 16, 2017, 09:38:00 am »
Sometimes  it's the little  things that are so nice... arriving  for ipl hr  and then trying to smooth my  kilt under me before I sat and being awkward and a woman already waiting.. said " not used to skirts?  " no I said what's the correct way.. she just laughed  and said there is  none 😊
or going to pick to pick up my Goth boots after repairs  and I asked if I could get some xtra snap buttons on my kilt /skirt the woman at the counter  tells me how to avoid that I thank her she beams at me and says "  I Iove a wrap around  skirt.
even though Ive.only Just begun females are so generous  and understanding   and inclusive and the Hrt allows
me to really empathise  with them.. truly it is gold
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Offline ElizabethK

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #163 on: October 17, 2017, 02:21:26 am »

even though Ive.only Just begun females are so generous  and understanding   and inclusive and the Hrt allows
me to really empathise  with them.. truly it is gold

They are the sweet moments of Transition that are difficult to describe but very validating and extremely pleasurable...as my journey continues these thing happen far more frequently....keep on enjoying then I know I do.
"You have the right to live an authentic life!"Alex Jolly

Transition Begun 25 September 2015
HRT since 17 May 2016
Fulltime from 8 March 2017
GCS Scheduled November 28 2018

Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #164 on: October 18, 2017, 07:39:21 am »
Yes it  really is 😊
I remember  all those months ago how you urged me not to be  scared  as it was a new way of looking at life.... well you weren't  kidding  ! it's wonderful 
and to think I had the Hrt sitting in the fridge all that time 😂
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Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #165 on: October 19, 2017, 10:04:17 pm »
Mmm almost got sprung again... sitting at the back of the bus, guy behind says how you feeling Markie? I said whys that?  Him.. your looking a little  pale then he laughs and says foundation?  so I played dumb and said what's foundation  ? another guy sitting  across starts laughing  and said foundations  of a house 😂
So now my new game is to get away with makeup well sort of make up
I just blend some beige sunscreen /moisturiser  with some. white zinc cream over some pore filler
then a touch of translucent finishing powder.. some setting spray
it's working pretty darn good and is great practice not to mention sun protection in this blazing landscape
Arriving  back in camp  a female colleague with her bf sees  me and exclaims have I had a facial?
no I say then she says you have the most beautiful  skin.... I was thinking about it the other day
that really caught me off guard as I had no makeup on at all... later looking in the mirror I noticed the skin pores are a lot. smaller and my skin has taken on a different  hue
I'm pleased she noticed as I means I'm making headway
I have noticed in the malls people looking at me... I'm used to that as when I was bodybuilding  I tended to stand out but now they are looking  at some other attribute maybe it's the skull earings but definitely  getting a different  vibe these days I like it 😊
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Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #166 on: October 20, 2017, 07:19:17 am »
I often see this with the FTMs however as their transition progresses and they  discover how comfortable they are in the new role, the percentages shift to favor the new role


Yes I agree with this, I just have to get around the body dysphoria and a whole bunch of other staff but I find myself unconciously adopting certain  seated positions which are feminine but at the same time it feels completely  natural 
The people  I live and work with are using my masculine  Nick name less and less 
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Online Laurie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #167 on: October 20, 2017, 08:21:06 am »
It's called progress Markie. You are making progress towards your new life little by little you are getting there. All it take is one step at a time.

 Hugs,
   Laurie
Hi, I'm Laurie
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Offline ElizabethK

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #168 on: October 21, 2017, 12:51:14 am »
Mmm almost got sprung again... sitting at the back of the bus, guy behind says how you feeling Markie? I said whys that?  Him.. your looking a little  pale then he laughs and says foundation?  so I played dumb and said what's foundation  ? another guy sitting  across starts laughing  and said foundations  of a house 😂
So now my new game is to get away with makeup well sort of make up
I just blend some beige sunscreen /moisturiser  with some. white zinc cream over some pore filler
then a touch of translucent finishing powder.. some setting spray
it's working pretty darn good and is great practice not to mention sun protection in this blazing landscape


I really enjoyed reading that, foundation...house foundations...sure it was. Have you tried BB cream which already has sunblock in it and comes in varying shades, it is also moisturiser...It goes on nicely and if you get the right blend it will be even harder to pick. I have really enjoyed the changes in my skin and how much better it feels and looks...

Damage from our fierce sun can be difficult to repair as we get older and prevention is always better than the cure

So how far are you going to push along with the makeup...what about a lip balm....cherry red maybe!! LOL
"You have the right to live an authentic life!"Alex Jolly

Transition Begun 25 September 2015
HRT since 17 May 2016
Fulltime from 8 March 2017
GCS Scheduled November 28 2018

Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #169 on: October 21, 2017, 09:10:02 am »
Haha  yes I'd   love cherry red  ,  or black 😈
Swisse bb yes I have and I still have some though I need the lighter tint, ive  been using invisible  zinc which is a
similar product... Oh yes I wish I had slip, slopped,slap all those years ago..damm it's hot up here 42c today
and out labouring,  whew time to sleep
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Offline ElizabethK

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #170 on: October 21, 2017, 08:46:42 pm »
I have seen you before with black and you really do rock that goth look
"You have the right to live an authentic life!"Alex Jolly

Transition Begun 25 September 2015
HRT since 17 May 2016
Fulltime from 8 March 2017
GCS Scheduled November 28 2018

Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #171 on: October 23, 2017, 03:14:33 am »
Thank you Liz  :D
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Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #172 on: October 29, 2017, 08:26:15 am »
Tonight at the wetmess one of my work mates brought some food ( the food at the dry mess is crap) and shared it ...so when i went to buy more drinks at the bar i bought him a couple ....so i sit down at the table and pass him a couple of beers and he then points at the ones in front of him and says ...i've  already got enough ...."you crazy b---h"😆
It was a Freudian slip,.....it startled me as a few months ago to utter such a thing to me would have meant ...the equivalant of signing your death certificate....but instead i pretended i had not heard it and im pretty sure he didnt realise what he said , actually i was very pleased ....my doc said they would female name me after 6mths
This is a different situation asnwe work togther for weeks on end im the middle of nowhere
Well this is weird i noticed  my gait is different im walking  and i've put more size on my inner thighs  which may be why i am walking different
Boobs are growing ...one side more than the other ...and sore as well
Incidentally the guy who cussed me was earlier remaking on how my skin was so white ...he didnt seem to be able understand it and was also asking me if i had a girl etc .....
Wow the social dynamics are soooo interesting....now if i can get my ffs done it should get ...really interesting😊
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Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #173 on: November 01, 2017, 07:06:02 am »
Strike 2 ! In melbourne getting some tatts done and the tattooist
Asked my age then his assistant 'gf said ....i have really nice Skin refering to my face ....so things are happening 😊
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Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #174 on: November 18, 2017, 12:49:13 am »




Ive had a couple of girls remark that i look different ...
What i've really noticed is that my eyelashs have grown heaps and now that progestrone has been added
they  are much darker
noticed a  bit more mass around the thighs and hips ...and top wise well its sore
Oh and bottom lip is getting 😉 plumper

Couldn't resist the oil tanl lol
« Last Edit: November 18, 2017, 02:12:20 am by markie »
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Offline ElizabethK

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #175 on: November 18, 2017, 12:52:19 am »
<img src="https://vgy.me/sj7qyd.jpg">

<img src="https://vgy.me/FMBQZU.jpg">

Ive had a couple of girls remark that i look different ....i can see i'm looking a bit pasty 😅

I can see there is a difference in your skin tone and you definitely look lighter in the face...don't know if Pasty is the right word you look leaner?

I got you email  ;)
"You have the right to live an authentic life!"Alex Jolly

Transition Begun 25 September 2015
HRT since 17 May 2016
Fulltime from 8 March 2017
GCS Scheduled November 28 2018

Offline markie

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Re: Thinking out loud
« Reply #176 on: November 18, 2017, 01:24:00 am »
No worries Liz yes i might change that add some more details too 😊
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