Author Topic: Spiritual growth and transition to an authentic life.  (Read 389 times)

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Offline JB_Girl

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Spiritual growth and transition to an authentic life.
« on: April 18, 2017, 03:32:24 pm »
I am a creature of spirit.  I am also a nonbinary transexual woman.  I have been transitioning for most of the last decade, on HRT for a bit over five years, been clean and sober since 1989, and had GRS with Dr. Ley in Scottsdale a bit more than a month ago.

Transition, for me, has been the ultimate expression of the quest into who I am, why I am, and how that relates to my relationship with what most people describe as objective reality.  I am reminded of a song that Meg Christian wrote many years ago that has the lyric; "When the waves grow angry and mean, I dive into the deep serene."

It is the search for my internal truth, and the serenity that this encompasses that has been the focus of my experience in transition, seeking first who I am beneath the trappings of a middle class, well-educated resident person in the last quarter of her life.  All my life I have been a pilgrim and the pilgrimage has been, as all are, both external and experiential and internal and meditative.  I could not find an authentic way to live without addressing the dysphoria that I had known for most of my life.  I could not find the path to my inner self without addressing the relationship of my body, to my mind, my environment and ultimately to my spirit.

The journey to who I am spanned decades, four continents, loves both lost and found, and has resulted in a woman who does not refuse or refute her history, and who has come to embrace the symbology of meditation and prayer as fundamental to growth.  This is the essence of the spiritual experience for me.  To “find within ourselves an unsuspected resource that we presently came to identify with our own conception of a power that is greater than ourselves” is the way another author beautifully phrased the experience. 

This search for strength, for meaning, for authenticity is the greatest blessing that the experience of transition has given to me.  It transcends the struggle, the fear, the pain and the loss that I have experienced throughout much of my life. If you have any thoughts or experience along this line I would love to continue the conversation.

Namaste,
JB

Offline Gertrude

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Re: Spiritual growth and transition to an authentic life.
« Reply #1 on: April 18, 2017, 10:39:44 pm »
I am a creature of spirit.  I am also a nonbinary transexual woman.  I have been transitioning for most of the last decade, on HRT for a bit over five years, been clean and sober since 1989, and had GRS with Dr. Ley in Scottsdale a bit more than a month ago.

Transition, for me, has been the ultimate expression of the quest into who I am, why I am, and how that relates to my relationship with what most people describe as objective reality.  I am reminded of a song that Meg Christian wrote many years ago that has the lyric; "When the waves grow angry and mean, I dive into the deep serene."

It is the search for my internal truth, and the serenity that this encompasses that has been the focus of my experience in transition, seeking first who I am beneath the trappings of a middle class, well-educated resident person in the last quarter of her life.  All my life I have been a pilgrim and the pilgrimage has been, as all are, both external and experiential and internal and meditative.  I could not find an authentic way to live without addressing the dysphoria that I had known for most of my life.  I could not find the path to my inner self without addressing the relationship of my body, to my mind, my environment and ultimately to my spirit.

The journey to who I am spanned decades, four continents, loves both lost and found, and has resulted in a woman who does not refuse or refute her history, and who has come to embrace the symbology of meditation and prayer as fundamental to growth.  This is the essence of the spiritual experience for me.  To “find within ourselves an unsuspected resource that we presently came to identify with our own conception of a power that is greater than ourselves” is the way another author beautifully phrased the experience. 

This search for strength, for meaning, for authenticity is the greatest blessing that the experience of transition has given to me.  It transcends the struggle, the fear, the pain and the loss that I have experienced throughout much of my life. If you have any thoughts or experience along this line I would love to continue the conversation.

Namaste,
JB

Dr ley works with Meltzer, no? How was that experience?


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Offline Jane Emily

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Re: Spiritual growth and transition to an authentic life.
« Reply #2 on: April 18, 2017, 11:24:34 pm »
Very wonderfully stated. I agree it' not about how big one's boobs are or how well one passes that is of primary importance in MTF transition.  It's about the journey. It's about the reason for our existence. Which is, above all I think, about the great project of the improvement of the soul.  The metamorphosis. The change into what is for each one of us a unique authentic way of being. 

Assigned Male at Birth - 1958
Came out, started living full time - Thanksgiving 2015
Started HRT - 5-27-2016

Estrogen HRT = the surprising arrival of a rainbow within my body.

Tags: myth Yoga Spirituality