General Discussions > Pets and creatures

My dog got ran over at 11 pm on 11/23/17

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I saw it all...
I feel terrible...I treated him poorly before it happened. I was angry at him for rolling into dog poop and mud everyday. I didn't even get to pet him..
I hate myself so much. The pain of never getting to pet him when he was alive..I was too afraid to on his last moments too..I cant sleep..Its already 4 am. The image keeps flashing through my head, the cries and screams, and the smell.. It wont go away. I tried to keep my mind off of it.. I just can't. My eyes are playing tricks on me and doors are opening by themselves. I just feel the vibe of negativity lingering. I saw my mom cry and my sick grandfather eyes widen and him asking if its true and rocking himself back and forth. I feel like its my fault..
I said something terrible and it jinx me. I'm so scared..after what I saw tonight..I just..fear death so much even though its a part a life and some life's are ended too quickly.. I just hate myself for not being nicer.. not being there for him..not petting him..I should've pet him when he was barely breathing. I should've comforted him. I was too afraid.. I was in shock...he deserved to be comforted before his agonizing death.. Now I can't look at people anymore without the fear of them going too.. I can't look at highways the same.. R.I.P Cookie October 30, 2004- November 23rd 2017.
I had him since I was 2 years old..
I wish I could take back everything cruel or rude I've ever done..
I feel like he hates me..
I'm scared of being alone like his last minutes
I'm scared of dying
I'm scared of an painful long death
I'm scared of everything

Big hug! I'm sorry about Cookie. Dogs give us their whole lives, and then they leave us, and we're left to go on with a piece missing. Farewell, Cookie.

Hugs, Devlyn

I am so sorry.  When the family pets died it affected me more than the deaths of my parents, although I loved my parents.  Pets are like children, especially if we can't have biological children.  I know how you must feel, having spoken harshly to your dog before it died, but you have nothing to blame yourself for, as you did everything you could for your dog and its death was an accident. 

I really do know how you feel.  When I was nearly 16, when the family went on holiday, I was given the task of putting one of our dogs in a cage at the local kennels.  It resisted and I spoke harshly to it.  While on our journey, in the car, my parents said that the dog had been put down because of its behaviour.  I was shocked and said nothing but later cried myself to sleep.  The last words I spoke to it were harsh ones, then it was murdered by strangers into whose "care" I had dragged it.  I am nearly 62 and thinking about it still makes me cry.  It was worse, though.  Many years later, my father confessed that the dog had actually not been put down until we returned from holiday.  The fact that they hadn't seen me cry made them decide that it would be okay to go through with it.  I failed the dog in three ways, by dragging it to its death, by speaking harshly to it and by not crying in front of my parents.  I can never forgive myself and it is the only thing for which I can't forgive my parents.  If they wanted it dead, they shouldn't have given me the task of dragging it away.

I still talk to my mother's last dog, though it died on the afternoon of August 18th, 2010 (yes, we do remember these things).  I find it comforting to do so.  All I can suggest is that in private, you talk to your dog and tell it how you feel.  It may give you comfort, and for all we know its spirit will hear you.

What a horrible thing to experience. I feel so bad for you right now. It will ease, I remember because we had a family pet that would escape every chance that he got. One day he escaped dragging the leash. He ran in front of my car and I'm the one that ran over him :(. I felt horrible every day for months before it eased up. It still bothers me when I think about it but it's tolerable now.

Hang in there, you'll make it. Remember, memories keeps things with you, pain & loss just happens to be part of it.

Peter. You are still young and will have many opportunities ahead of you to make up for past deeds. I'm on my 7th dog. My dog Pokey was poisoned by a neighbor. As devastating as that was I have had three more doggies. Reilly my Brittany Spaniel died last year. He was only 12 years old. I have since gotten a Husky and a long hair Dachshund. To watch Reilly be put down was really traumatic but he was out of pain. It hurts at any age. But now you know how not to treat your friends and you have a chance to make amends with your next one. One suggestion is to make sure your next dog is a rescue from the pound.

I get knocked down, but I get up again
You are never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
You are never gonna keep me down


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