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Offline christinej78

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Hi I'm christine J
« on: March 18, 2018, 03:55:58 pm »
Hello everyone; I'm Christine, new here and new to realizing that I am transgender. When I finally realized and accepted that I am MTF I had an enormous feeling of relief and happiness at being so and gratitude for the help my counselor provided me. Since that day five days ago I have been floating on cloud 9.

The desire to be a girl only left me when I was a young adult wanting to be a women. All this happened years ago; I'm a product of the 1940's, which sometimes feels like the 1840's. At any rate, I tried to suppress my desire as best that I could. I eventually married and began wearing my wife's clothes with her blessing.

Eventually divorced, remarried and divorced again. Gee, someone has a problem, which I KNOW (sarc) couldn't be me.

A little over six years ago I was wearing women's clothing full time and living as a woman, though I don't think anyone noticed it for what it was. I didn't try to pass as female due to physical limitations. Sometimes it pays to be a bit flamboyant and eccentric.

I enjoyed what I was doing but didn't feel fulfilled. I was living in denial and deceit. I realized I needed to come to terms with who and what I was. At that time the only thing I knew about transgender was how to spell it; I was essentially clueless.

Onto the Internet and all that it promised; lots of info. I did lots of searching and found Sherry Joannes' Transition Web Site; a fine documentary of her passage through transition plus a wealth of other transgender information.

After reading about everything she wrote I found Devlyn Marie's thread on Susan's Place:: "Orchiectomy cost and concerns," another well written and informative article.

After reading her thread I realized she had blazed a trail for me, thank you Devlyn; I want to transition as you did. Probably no coincidence that we are both Veterans; no coincidence either that she has a sharp and tangy wit to go along. Since then I have been scouring your site for everything I can think of that will help me with my adventure and it is working. I also know I am in the company of a great family; I thank you for allowing me the privilege of being a member of this wonderful family.

Prior to my final counselor visit, some email went back and forth between us. In one of the emails I received from her she made a statement that had a profound impact on me. It went like this:

"As you wear gals' clothes most of the time, think of an identity name that goes with that, such as gender-nonconforming, that feels honest." When I read this sentence I felt liberated and positive that I am a real woman, though I don't look like one... Yet!!!.
 
My response to her was: "I believe my gender ID should be female, which is where I am mentally and where I want to be physically; even prior to my orchiectomy and HRT, female is the most honest and correct gender ID I can think of. I did spend time trying to come up with something cute and witty. In the end, anything other than female would have been untrue and a continuation of the denial I have been living with most of my life."

Monday should be an exciting day; I have an appointment with my primary doctor; I will be outing myself to him and hope he will be there to help me transition or will find someone that can and will if he is unable. I'll let you know how it goes.

Speaking of outing oneself, I hadn't the foggiest as to how I should go about it, I just knew I wanted to and should do it and hope for the best. My first outing turned out to be with my gastro and was a very fulfilling event. Next I outed to a family of dear friends. I received their love and complete support for my transition. What a fantastic experience. Each time I do it I feel another surge of happiness. Why did I wait so long to decide to transition??? Nothing is going to stop me, I am going to travel this sometimes bumpy road to my destiny, which is to be what I have wanted to be since I was a young boy, being a girl, a woman and a real female. I have now begun the adventure of a lifetime. I've had many great adventures in life, this will be the greatest and most fulfilling of all.

I want to thank you all for this Web site and my counselor for her help and support; your experiences and advice have been a real asset in my personal journey, albeit a short one at the moment. I wish there was a place I could go where I could walk into a booth, drop a few quarters into a slot and all of a sudden my VJ would be in place, I'd have a nice set of perky boobs adorning my chest and a caboose that would be nice, round and firm to the pinch. I can dream can't I?

Thanks bunches for being here; love to all of you,

Christine
« Last Edit: April 18, 2018, 04:56:24 pm by christinej78 »
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Online Alaskan Danielle

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #1 on: March 18, 2018, 04:08:31 pm »
Hello Christine...WELCOME to Susan's Place.  You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others about your transition and to read about others transitions and their trials, tribulations, and successes in their transition journey. 
It is nice that you have signed up so you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other members.
When frustrated or if you have a successful moment in your journey you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. You might even find that you will make some new friends here.  Please come in and get involved at your own pace.
Again, Welcome.
Danielle

Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that all new members should be familiar with:


Things that you should read
« Last Edit: March 20, 2018, 01:34:46 pm by Alaskan Danielle »
Started HRT March 2015     3+ years ago, it's been an exciting journey
>>> I've been Full Time since December 2016
  .
:icon_chick:
I am 38 years old, Single, and Self Employed in a small town up in the COLD North.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
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Online Jessica

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #2 on: March 18, 2018, 04:27:26 pm »
Hi Christine 🙋‍♀️ Welcome to Susan’s Place!  I’m Jessica. 
Yes, @Devlyn Marie does have a sharp and tangy wit.  Have you seen her glossary of types of transgender people... here’s a link to it. https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,235440.msg2108953.html#msg2108953

I’m sure your doctors appointment will go just swimmingly, and you will be taking your next steps on a newer path, one you know you need to be on.

Please take a moment or two to read the links that Danielle has provided.  They can be a big help.
Afterwards, consider giving Devlyn a hello.  I’m sure she will be delighted.

... it's like running a car on ethanol when it's supposed to take gasoline... it'll work, but it's eventually gonna break down until you put it on the proper fuel.

Online Devlyn

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #3 on: March 18, 2018, 04:48:04 pm »
Welcome, Christine! I can't tell you how pleased I am that my posts were helpful to you.  :)

Thank you for your service, if you get a chance stop by Roll Call! and say hi to our veterans.  See you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn

Offline Megan.

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #4 on: March 18, 2018, 04:53:43 pm »
Hi Christine, any friend of Devlyn's is... To be approached with caution!

Only kidding . I'm glad you've found your way here, good luck with your journey.

X

Sent from my MI 5s using Tapatalk


Online Devlyn

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #5 on: March 18, 2018, 04:55:38 pm »
My reputation precedes me!  ;D

Offline Cassi

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #6 on: March 18, 2018, 04:59:23 pm »
My reputation precedes me!  ;D

She doesn't know the Devyl yet :)

Oh, and Hi Christine!

Don't worry about me, I'm mis-menstraul :)
« Last Edit: March 19, 2018, 12:48:00 am by Cassi »

Offline PollyQMcLovely

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #7 on: March 18, 2018, 05:01:16 pm »
Welcome Christine!

Offline christinej78

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #8 on: March 18, 2018, 10:06:49 pm »
Thank you all so much for the warm welcome, I am overwhelmed; I have been reading the articles in the links you have provided. There is such a wealth of information on this site that I sometimes think I am in "Cerebral Overload," kind of like what happens when you make your first parachute jump. I bet Devlyn knows what I'm talking about.

Devlyn,  thank you for your service as well. I'm ex-Navy, have a parachute and have never used it; having been a pilot I can't see jumping out of a perfectly good airplane.

I can't wait for tomorrow to out myself to my Doctor of over 20 years. He is also a personal friend so I'm not worried about him not accepting my decision to transition. He already knows that I want an orchiectomy and that I dress in women's clothes so I seriously doubt that he will be surprised.

I now know what and who I am and what I want to be for the remainder of my life. That being said I am sure I do not need a lengthy trial period. Also, I'm not a spring chicken so I don't want to waste any more time than I already have. Old too soon; smart too late; though I won't let it be too late for me this time.

Starting on female hormones without the AA's should, in my opinion, help initiate my feminization. Then an orchiectomy, should, (IMO) speed up the feminization process. My goal is to have my physical self align with my true female gender in less time than it would using AAs.. When the alignment becomes obviously noticeable, it will be the blessing I am hoping for. I'm already looking at bras though I won't be buying one until I have something real to put in it.

My appointment with a surgeon that provides services for our community is less than a month away. I hope he will accept where I'm coming from and will schedule my orchiectomy for shortly thereafter.

In my introduction I mentioned going into a box and dropping quarters in a slot. From my life's experiences I have learned that anything easily obtained, usually isn't worth having nor is it very satisfying.

A heartfelt thanks to everyone on this site for being here. I am at the happiest I have been in many years. I look forward to keeping you updated on my progress and hopefully helping others in their journey to being their true selves.

Thanks,

Christine
« Last Edit: April 18, 2018, 09:54:03 pm by christinej78 »
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Offline Donna

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #9 on: March 18, 2018, 10:20:09 pm »
Welcome Christine. You are going to enjoy it here. Enjoy your journey and make lots of new friends here. My doctor was the first person I came out to. It was the start of moving forward. Im sure it will help you.
December 2015 noticed strange feelings moving in
December 2016 started to understand what my body has been telling me all my life, started wearing a bra for comfort full time
Spiro and dutastricide 2017
Mid year 2017 Started dressing and going out shopping etc by myself
October T 14.8 / 456
Came out to my wife in December 2017
January 2018 dressing androgenes and still have face hair
Feb 2018 Dressing full time in female clothing out at work and to friends and family, clean shaven and make up
Living full time March 1 2018
March T 7.4 / 236
April 19th eligard injection, no more Testosterone
[/
[url=https://www.susans.org/forums]

July 23 appointment with urologist to set orchi date.

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #10 on: March 18, 2018, 10:52:48 pm »
Hi Christine,

Welcome! I look forward to hearing more about your new adventures on the forums here  - If you're willing to share some of them with us.

Take care,

Sonja.

Online V M

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #11 on: March 18, 2018, 11:03:00 pm »
Hi Christine  :icon_wave:

Welcome to Susan's Place  :)  Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #12 on: March 19, 2018, 08:50:02 am »
Welcome to Susan's Place Christine !
There is a lot of good info in the links section here, and many useful resources as well.
The people here are friendly and helpful, and you will have a great time at this site while gaining new insights.
Carry on, and dilly dilly ------------------------------>
Joannie
Those who deny freedom to others....Do not deserve it for themselves.  Abraham Lincoln

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #13 on: March 19, 2018, 02:09:12 pm »
Welcome to Susan's Place Christine !
There is a lot of good info in the links section here, and many useful resources as well.
The people here are friendly and helpful, and you will have a great time at this site while gaining new insights.
Carry on, and dilly dilly ------------------------------>
Joannie
Dilly Dilly?????

Offline christinej78

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #14 on: March 19, 2018, 11:58:02 pm »
Hi  Family members and visitors,              19 May 2018

Got up later than usual this am; went to bed later than usual so I guess it all evened out.

Fed the kids (arf,  arf, & arf) fed this old gal, typed up the items I wanted to discuss with the Doc. Got that done, took the kids out for their morning "duty" stroll; ate b-fast, showered and dressed in sexy panties, cami and top, nice slacks, flashy sneakers then headed for my appointment with the Doctor.

Took care of the medical stuff, which was a shot for my seasonal allergies; That done I handed him my transition letter from the counselor, His first comment was "I'm proud of you." He was fully supportive and said he would write a letter for the surgeon recommending the orchi without going through the trial period with AAs.

We discussed the hormones; he said he had ok'd prescription refills for trans patients but had never started anyone on them. He said he would find a good endocrinologist to handle my hormone treatment. We talked a lot about my transition and how I came to this point. I gave him the bio I wrote just for this situation and he agreed this is what I need to do.

I think my 10 minute appointment ran for over an hour. I tell people I'd hate to be the person with the appointment that follows mine.

I felt like a million bucks on my way home. Things, so far, are going very well. After taking the kids out I saw the mail truck coming down our route so I waited for my favorite "Female-man" to get to my house. She pulled up to where I was standing. We said our pleasantries and then I asked her if she could keep a secret. Of course she said sure she could. I then told her I am transgender MTF. She started laughing and said: "No you're not, you  are too manly." We went back and forth having a good time yuking it up and her not believing me. I eventually said; "Look at the clothes I'm wearing, what do you think?" she said "You look kind of gay." So I pulled the lace strap of my camisole out through the neck of my top, at which she then realized I wasn't BSing her. So this went well and was a lot of fun. She brought up a point when she asked me if I was going to date men. I said no, I like women and want to be one.

She left, which left me thinking: Who am I supposed to date if I decide to date? To be clear, I love women and like to be with them doing whatever they do and being one. When I am in a mixed gender social setting I always gravitate towards the women. I like talking with them; they are much more interesting than most men who love to talk about macho stuff like football, baseball, basketball, golf, etc. I could care less about that stuff, I like to listen to and be with the ladies and to be one.

My next stop was to another lady friend and she was completely supportive. I didn't have a lot of time with her as her husband, my buddy, is ill. Next I visited my deceased buddies widow and let her read the letter and bio. Her first comment was: "At least you could have given me a bit of a warning." I told her that's what I have been doing with the clothing I wear. When I ride my bike I wear women's shorts, tank top, socks and shoes. They are always bright colors and most of the time there is something in hot pink, my favorite color. Hint: if you see a 78 year old transgender woman wearing hot pink, there's a chance it's me. If she has a hot pink ball cap on that says "NAVY" on it, it probably is me. Now all you have to do is figure out where I am; HINT: The largest piece of real-estate in CONUS. Before I left she asked if she was going to loose her pasture Mower. I told her no, I'll still mow the pasture and to top things off she gains a "Lady friend."

I think I'm having too much fun outing myself; it could become habit forming.  This has to be it for today; I need sleep. It does leave me with an unanswered question: Who should I date? Since you folks have been out longer than I have you should be able to provide us with good advice. The balls (pun intended) are in your court. I eagerly await your answer. Speaking of balls, I can't wait to enshrine mine in the trophy case and hoping it will be sooner than later.

In closing, I want you all to know I really appreciate your being here for everyone; you are family. I hope I can add something positive to Susan's place.

A bit of advice to anyone wavering; don't wait too long like I did.

Thanks and Good Night all,

Christine
Veteran - US Navy                                       Arborist, rigger, climber, sawyer
Trans Woman 13 Apr 18                               LEO (Cop)
Living as female - 6 years                             Pilot
Start HRT san's AA's 27 March 2018              Mechanic
Borchiday completed Friday 13 Apr 2018        Engineer Multi Discipline
IT Management Consultant                            Programmer
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Offline Cassi

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #15 on: March 20, 2018, 12:07:15 am »
Good for you Christine!

As you have four-legged children I might share something that I think may or may not happen but seemed to happen to me.  About a month after beginning the HRT, my dogs started getting, for lack of a better word, sketchy, While I have no real sense of smell I have heard that our smell does change.  It's been close to 3 months now and they seem to be settled in with the change.

Thank you for your service.  I'm surprised the Devyl hadn't mentioned the Roll Call thread here or maybe I missed it.

Great to see you're in good health.  I am a few years younger than you and bought a bike for exercise but have had issues with seating and peddling.  For some reason they seem to work better downhill and during a strong wind :)

WELCOME

Offline christinej78

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #16 on: March 20, 2018, 01:44:48 am »
Good for you Christine!

As you have four-legged children I might share something that I think may or may not happen but seemed to happen to me.  About a month after beginning the HRT, my dogs started getting, for lack of a better word, sketchy, While I have no real sense of smell I have heard that our smell does change.  It's been close to 3 months now and they seem to be settled in with the change.

Thank you for your service.  I'm surprised the Devyl hadn't mentioned the Roll Call thread here or maybe I missed it.

Great to see you're in good health.  I am a few years younger than you and bought a bike for exercise but have had issues with seating and peddling.  For some reason they seem to work better downhill and during a strong wind :)

WELCOME

Hi Cassi,

Thank you for your reply; my understanding is that once we are transitioning to female we loose that funky male odor.  Before I started to transition I always wondered why I smelled so bad after sweating a little. I hate the smell and will be glad that will go when the nads are snatched from their lowly berth in that ugly wrinkly sack. I'm really thinking of having it removed as well. Once the nuts have been placed in the squirrel feeder there won't be any use for it as I am going the same route Devlyn has gone.

By the way, she did mention Roll Call. You are quite welcome; it was a privilege and honor to serve. This coming 15 December it will be 52 years since I was discharged. Doesn't seem possible that that much time could have slipped by unnoticed.

The seats they put on bikes are meant to torture our anatomy. Getting rid of that airline packet with two peanuts in it will be a help. I have purchased numerous saddles (bike seats). Eventually, you will find one that is compatible with your anatomy. One of the things I found that helps cushion the crotch is using panty liners in my panties. I buy Poise Ultra thin pads, long length #3 on the absorbency scale. I get them at Walmart; you can find some that are thicker and wider but they end up chaffing the inside of my thighs. I think it's a trial and error situation. Buy the smallest package you can the first time.

There are times here that the wind is so strong that it is almost impossible to ride down hill; its actually easier to ride up. It is windy here with 50 mph winds being common.

Here is a little something that I discovered during my transgender research: Getting rid of them can add years to ones life span. Several studies indicate that anywhere from 5 to 19 years. I'd give those ugly things up for an extra two minutes. I hope I can be awake when they remove them. It will be a dream come true watching their eviction from my space.

I see you changed your photo; you are a beautiful lady. Hope that some day we can meet in person. Today I was thinking since Susan knows where we all are, it would be neat if there was a way those of us that live fairly close to each other could meet for lunch or something. A friend of mine in Ohio belongs to a Facebook group that meets for lunch once a month. I'm sure we are scattered all over the world so there may not be enough of us folks close to each other for it to be feasible.

I have never been happier than I am now that I have embraced my femininity and started my adventure of transition. I know that being a women is what I had been searching for al my life. I just wasn't looking in the right places.

Thank you Cassi,

Christine
Veteran - US Navy                                       Arborist, rigger, climber, sawyer
Trans Woman 13 Apr 18                               LEO (Cop)
Living as female - 6 years                             Pilot
Start HRT san's AA's 27 March 2018              Mechanic
Borchiday completed Friday 13 Apr 2018        Engineer Multi Discipline
IT Management Consultant                            Programmer
Friend                                                          Bum, Bumett
Semi Retired                                                Still Enjoy Being a Kid, Refuse to Grow UP
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Ex-Biker, Ex-Harley Driver                             Friend of a Coyote

Offline christinej78

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #17 on: March 20, 2018, 02:28:03 am »
Welcome, Christine! I can't tell you how pleased I am that my posts were helpful to you.  :)

Thank you for your service, if you get a chance stop by Roll Call! and say hi to our veterans.  See you around the site!

Hugs, Devlyn

Hi Devlyn,

Thank you for documenting your orchiectomy; you have blazed a trail for me and I do appreciate your doing so. My hope is that with my doctor helping me I can have them in my trophy case by the end of April. If I were younger, it wouldn't be as big of an issue for me. The fact that I waited so long is no one's fault but mine.

I think I was cowardly in not facing up to my femininity, always having to be macho. I know one thing for certain, if I died and came back as a female knowing what I know now, I would be a lesbian. I do not like most men and I include myself in that group. I know the things I have done in the past and there is no way i can rectify or justify them.

I can't do anything about the past except not repeat it and keep moving forward. I can't wait until I begin HRT and have the little pearls strung up.

If these questions are too personal, don't answer them, I'll understand:

   How long did it take after the orchi for you to feel the affects of no testosterone??

   What did it feel like not having them?

Thanks bunches,

Christine
Veteran - US Navy                                       Arborist, rigger, climber, sawyer
Trans Woman 13 Apr 18                               LEO (Cop)
Living as female - 6 years                             Pilot
Start HRT san's AA's 27 March 2018              Mechanic
Borchiday completed Friday 13 Apr 2018        Engineer Multi Discipline
IT Management Consultant                            Programmer
Friend                                                          Bum, Bumett
Semi Retired                                                Still Enjoy Being a Kid, Refuse to Grow UP
Former Writer / Editor                                   Carpenter / Plumber / Electrician
Ex-Biker, Ex-Harley Driver                             Friend of a Coyote

Online Devlyn

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #18 on: March 20, 2018, 12:31:49 pm »
It wasn't long before I felt the proverbial calm.

Immediately after the surgery I had more balls than I've ever had, damn swelling!  ;D. Now the skin has finished retracting and it's just a tiny empty pouch with the penis hanging down in front of it. Panties fit better now and nothing finds its way out. I'm extremely happy with this body configuration.

Hugs, Devlyn

Offline Cassi

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Re: Hi I'm christine J
« Reply #19 on: March 20, 2018, 12:37:19 pm »
Hi Cassi,

Thank you for your reply; my understanding is that once we are transitioning to female we loose that funky male odor.  Before I started to transition I always wondered why I smelled so bad after sweating a little. I hate the smell and will be glad that will go when the nads are snatched from their lowly berth in that ugly wrinkly sack. I'm really thinking of having it removed as well. Once the nuts have been placed in the squirrel feeder there won't be any use for it as I am going the same route Devlyn has gone.

By the way, she did mention Roll Call. You are quite welcome; it was a privilege and honor to serve. This coming 15 December it will be 52 years since I was discharged. Doesn't seem possible that that much time could have slipped by unnoticed.

The seats they put on bikes are meant to torture our anatomy. Getting rid of that airline packet with two peanuts in it will be a help. I have purchased numerous saddles (bike seats). Eventually, you will find one that is compatible with your anatomy. One of the things I found that helps cushion the crotch is using panty liners in my panties. I buy Poise Ultra thin pads, long length #3 on the absorbency scale. I get them at Walmart; you can find some that are thicker and wider but they end up chaffing the inside of my thighs. I think it's a trial and error situation. Buy the smallest package you can the first time.

There are times here that the wind is so strong that it is almost impossible to ride down hill; its actually easier to ride up. It is windy here with 50 mph winds being common.

Here is a little something that I discovered during my transgender research: Getting rid of them can add years to ones life span. Several studies indicate that anywhere from 5 to 19 years. I'd give those ugly things up for an extra two minutes. I hope I can be awake when they remove them. It will be a dream come true watching their eviction from my space.

I see you changed your photo; you are a beautiful lady. Hope that some day we can meet in person. Today I was thinking since Susan knows where we all are, it would be neat if there was a way those of us that live fairly close to each other could meet for lunch or something. A friend of mine in Ohio belongs to a Facebook group that meets for lunch once a month. I'm sure we are scattered all over the world so there may not be enough of us folks close to each other for it to be feasible.

I have never been happier than I am now that I have embraced my femininity and started my adventure of transition. I know that being a women is what I had been searching for al my life. I just wasn't looking in the right places.

Thank you Cassi,

Christine

Hi Christine,

Thank you for the lovely compliment.  That picture, unlike the previous is my true self with a wee bit of make-up; liner, lipstick and shadow and of course the wig my daughter hates.

Out of 100 pictures I took of myself, 1 of 100 is better than none :)

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