Topic: Stevi's Saga

[Northern Star Girl]

@Stevi
Dear Stevi:
Where have you been on your personal thread?

Of course I have seen your recent postings and comments on other member's
threads... BUT you have left me and the rest of your loyal followers wondering
what has been happening in your life.

It is unbelievable but your VERY LAST update to your personal thread was
back in April 24 ,2019... that was SIX MONTHS AGO.... A HALF YEAR !!!! 

If you feel so inclined and ONLY if you feel comfortable doing so, come back
to your thread and tell us what has been going on in your life.

HUGS and best wishes from your loyal follower.
Danielle

[Donica]

Yes your followers would like to know? How did your court battle go? Who is everything on the East Coast?

[Northern Star Girl]

@Stevi
Dear Stevi:
I am missing reading your updates on your thread... 
..did I miss your announcement that you have another thread perhaps?

I trust that all is OK with you and your family....
I would love to read an update from you, but only
if you wish to do that and to share with me and
the rest of your avid followers.

Many HUGS,
Danielle

[Stevi]

Sorry girls,

It has been a long time since I posted about myself.  I have been lurking and on occasion mumbling something in other threads.

Anyway.  I have been well, mostly.  I had another eye surgery.   Right retina this time.  Came up rather quickly, this time.  The left eye I had done a couple years ago after a long time of waiting for it to get past "more harm than good, possibly" stage.  This time I had to stay face down for three weeks after the operation.

During that recovery time I prepared a presentation for my UU fellowship about the many facets of the transgender struggles in the current political and social environment.  That went well.  I spoke to about forty people and had very positive feedback.

In some of my last posts on this thread I mentioned my consideration of getting gender affirming surgery.  I did decide to pursue that with the blessings of my wife.  I selected a surgeon and had a consultation.  That went well.  It looked like everything was on track for a surgery date sometime after the new year starts.  Well covered by my insurance.  That all seemed to go sideways when the surgeon, two weeks after my consult, announced she was leaving the university system she was affiliated with at the end of the year to open her own practice this coming spring.  That put everything into chaos.  Lots of questions and few answers.  So the past couple months have been a bit of a roller coaster.  Ain't nuttin' easy.

Well, I got a call from the surgeon on Monday.  She is still leaving to set up her own practice but she has decided to stick around until the end of March.  That will allow her to fit me in right after the first of the year and still be in place to give me proper followup for about three months afterward.  I have a tentative date for January 7th.  That is what they put on the prior authorization request to my insurance provider.  I am told my provider typically takes about two weeks to make their determination.  I have made a lot of inquiries in the past myself with my insurance provider and I am 99% sure that I will be approved for the procedure.  I have got my fingers crossed and trying not to too psychologically invested in this, just yet.  When, and if, the approval comes through the actual date for the surgery will be locked in.  I expect it to be the second week of January.  The 7th is a conflict date with Penny and a visit with my retina surgeon.  She is having a problem with her left eye that my, now our, retina specialist is watching closely for deterioration.  It is still in the "more harm than good" phase.  We may both be in surgery recovery together.  I don't know how that is going to work out.  Ain't nuttin' easy.

You might recall, I am in litigation with my former fitness center.  That is going very slowly.  The defendants attorney deposed me several months ago.  My attorney thought they might come to the table to negotiate a settlement but that has not happened.  I have to figure out now whether I should make an offer, myself, or just ask the court to set a date for trial.  A jury trial in this conservative county is risky.  If I do not prevail, the precedent might do more harm than good.  The defendant really has no incentive to push this along since he has nothing to loose if I just allow it to die.  The ball is in my court, it seems.  This is going to be a marathon.  I guess.  Ain't nuttin' easy.

Penny and I have decided to move into the town where we attend the UU fellowship.  The epicenter of our lives has moved there.   We are spending a great deal of time there and it is about 40 minutes travel to and from.  There is little here where we are now other than the home we live in.  We have done some house hunting but with the on and off and on again surgery, upcoming travel plans with our daughter in December, Penny's health issues that might involve surgery and some rehab and financial considerations we decided to put that off for a while.  I had thought that we would try to find something in the housing market after the first of the year.  With Monday's news, that is all in disarray again.  Ain't nuttin' easy.

So, that is the short and sweet and sour of the past few months.  I hope everyone is doing at least as well. 

Hugs to all,
Stevi

[Northern Star Girl]

@Stevi
Dear Stevi:
Thank you so very much for your long awaited comprehensive update.

I am glad that your eye surgery was just in time to save your eyesight....  any of us have to keep on top of our health and what we sense may be undesirable changes.

I would like to read how your presentation goes for your UU fellowship.... when are you planning to give your talk?

It was good to read that your wife was supportive with your planned Gender Affirming Surgery...  but it appeared to be on hold due to circumstances beyond your control.... and then with the call from your surgeon, it is back on track.   I am certain that you are disappointed with the delay and change of plans but January 7th is just 6 weeks away.

Oh no, and now your wife Penny is having eye problems.... I trust that everything goes well for her.

So sorry to read of the continued delays and slow-motion action with your lawyers....  those kinds of legal things are always full of delays and change of plans.... patience my friend!!!

I wish you well with your proposed relocation, if it happens you will save a lot of personal time and also gas money.

Your reoccurring theme of "Ain't nuttin' easy." seems to be quite appropriate to your update.

Even though your update was a combination of "sweet and sour" at least you are making progress on some fronts.... be glad it was not all bad news.

Thank you for coming back to your thread and updating me and the rest of your followers.

I am wishing you well as you continue on!
HUGS and best wishes as always,
Danielle

[Donica]

Good to hear from you again Stevi. I have caught you here and there on the threads. Congratulations on your surgery date. I hope it all works out for you both.

My now passed father in law went through a retina surgery and was laid up face down for three weeks too. I don't imagine it was very fun.

It sounds like you have a tough decision to make regarding your court battle. It would be a shame if this gym owner gets away with his unethical behavior. I wish you all the best of luck.

Hugs!

[Northern Star Girl]

@Stevi
Dear Stevi:
I am so glad that you are here on your thread keeping us all up to date. 
....your followers desire to read your updates and see your pictures that you post.

I hope that your different situations that you described in your last update get resolved soon.  It is not fun to have ongoing medical issues and of course that unsolved legal issue.

My sweetie ToothFairy and I will be heading to be with her family for Thanksgiving in Montana soon.
We are planning to be out of town for several weeks, no specific date when I will be getting back home.

I might not be able to get good cell phone service and get online so I want to wish you and your wife and family a Happy Thanksgiving and a wonderful and Merry Christmas.
HUGS,
Danielle


Started HRT:   March 2015
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[Stevi]

Danielle,

May your travels be safe and your visits joyful.

Stevi

[Stevi]

I just found a post that HappyMoni left over a week ago.  It appears it is a bit of a farewell.  I hope not but I fear so. There have been others with whom I have walked along my path who have moved on, it seems, as well.  Laurie, Michelle_P have said their goodbyes.  Others, like myself, stop by less often or have much less to say.  So many names.  So many good companions.

It is sad in some ways.  Sad enough to induce ocular leakage.  Still. it is encouraging.  When I first came to these pages, first as a lurker, then more involved, I was in a bad place.  All of you know the symptoms.  Since I am, now, approaching the completion of my transition, the constant presence of the angst I once endured has dissipated immensely.  At least it has for me and I suspect it has for so many others who I came to know, just a little, here.

The encouragement is for those of you who are in the throws of despair over how this situation you find yourself in can be resolved without great loss.  How this can possibly turn out well.  Rest assured, it can.   Persevere, with one another's support   One day you will look around and see that you and those you have traveled with are on to better places in your life.  I wish all well.

I am not, not yet, saying goodbye.  I am simply reflecting on a part of the journey.  One, like so many other parts that is, for me, at least, accompanied by tears.

Love and hope to you all,
Stevi

[Donica]

Yes I presume we will all past the torch at some time or another. I have to admit, I haven't been following as much as I have in the past. But so far it is due to much more activity in my life now and finding to time can be challenging. To those that are leaving, it is with a heavy heart I say good by and a heart felt thank you for your friendship and support. I will always hope we all can meet again.

Hugs!

[Nicole70]

Hi Stevi,

I have always followed your thread, not always commented, I hope you are feeling a little better than last week when nuttin’ was easy, and I hope you have some success with your local swimming centre but at the same time don’t over stress it, some battles are worth fighting, some not so much but that’s for you to judge. I always think back to the words my Grandad always used to say to me and I think it always holds true, “don’t let the bug$$rs get you down”, he was a Yorkshireman so I’m not sure those words translate well to your part of the world but some people aren’t worth upsetting your happiness.

I too have noticed a lot of old friends leave recently, it’s sad but sometimes when the environment changes then people feel uncomfortable to hang around, I’m also feeling this way and this is probably a farewell from me too, I’ll pm you.

Hugs and best wishes,

Nicole

[Stevi]

Hi all,

I have been in a melancholic mood today. On the verge of tears throughout. I, along with my wife, attended a UU service this morning.  The closing hymn, "We Laugh, We Cry" (Shelley Jackson Denham) was one I thought apropos to my mood. I dared not breathe the words as the fellowship sang them.  The last verse is as follows: 

We seek elusive answers to
the questions of this life.
We seek to put an end to all
the waste of human strife.

We search for truth, equality,
and blessed peace of mind.
And then, we come together here
to make sense of what we find.

And we believe in life,
and in the strength of love;
and we have found a joy
being together.

And in our search of peace,
maybe we'll finally see:
even to question truly
is an answer.

[Stevi]

I just got an automated phone call.  My insurance provider has approved my physician's request for approval for the procedure.  The caller was not a person so I could not ask for the details.  But, the only request for authorization I know of is for my bottom surgery.  So, I guess, I have finally made the next milestone of my journey.  The tentative date that was entered into the request is January 7th, 2020.  There are a couple of details to iron out with other appointments so that may not be the actual date.  I will contact the surgeon's support staff on Monday to deal with that.


Down to about six weeks!   Big smile!

Stevi

[Nicole70]

Wonderful news Stevi, so happy for you!

[Stevi]

Nicole,

Thank you.   I hope all is going well with you.

Stevi

[JudiBlueEyes]

Very good!  I hope that was what it was for.  That date is approaching fast!

[Stevi]

Hello to one and all,  Or, no one,

I have not been in these parts for quite some time.  Getting on with a busy life, mostly.  I do have a couple of things to report.  Just to tie up loose ends, I suppose.  Maybe, there is someone there from those days gone by that might be wondering what happened to me.

If you recall, I was involved in a lawsuit over being kicked out of the gym my wife and I were members with when I inquired about a transgender policy.  Well, it has been settled.  I cashed a check.  I have the right to tell my story in my own words except I can't identify the gym.

Bottom surgery?  After a string of hurdles that included the surgeon leaving her post to start her own practice, subsequently offering to return to do the operation, the legal department stepping in and saying "no way", followed by another surgeon beginning to set things up even to the point of having insurance approval only to be halted by Covid's effect on non-emergency surgeries my wife and I are packed for a flight in the morning to make the last preparations on Friday for peritoneal vaginoplasty surgery this coming Monday the 20th.

My journey to this point has been a lot like that run-on sentence that you just read.  I made the decision April of 2019 to do this.  I had to get my medical team letters re-issued because they were more than a year old. I have only gotten the date set in the past month.


Stevi

[Northern Star Girl]

@Stevi
Hello Stevi:
You certainly were missed by many of your followers, certainly me included.
Thank you for coming back to your blog/thread to get us all updated on what has been going on in your life.

Your last post here on your thread was in early December,  7 months ago!!!!!

I am so glad to read that your lawsuit with your local gym has been settled and you have a check deposited in your bank account as a result!  That is very good news indeed.

Wow, surgery is approved for you finally!!!   Congratulations.

Please continue to keep me and the rest of your followers updated, we want to root for your success as you report what is going on.... we are your biggest fans.

I am hoping that I won't have to wait months and months to see another update from you!

HUGS and best wishes....  wishing you well with your surgery plans.
Danielle

[Stevi]

Danielle,

Can always count on you.  Thanks for taking notice of me scurrying by in the shadows.

Yes it has been a while since I posted.  I have dropped by to peek in on my friends among these pages.  I did not have much connection with most of them outside the one here.  Without them it just did not seem like there was much for me to say anymore.

Besides, my time has been full with some advocating for others and a busy life where I live as myself with few difficulties and more friends around me (even with Covid) and lots and lots to get done.  I no longer have the great need for the support of others that initiated this particular thread.  So, life is good for me.

I will come back after this coming Monday's grand event and report back on how I am doing and how things are going.

Hugs back to my northern friend,
Stevi

[steph2.0]

Danielle,

Can always count on you.  Thanks for taking notice of me scurrying by in the shadows.

Yes it has been a while since I posted.  I have dropped by to peek in on my friends among these pages.  I did not have much connection with most of them outside the one here.  Without them it just did not seem like there was much for me to say anymore.

Besides, my time has been full with some advocating for others and a busy life where I live as myself with few difficulties and more friends around me (even with Covid) and lots and lots to get done.  I no longer have the great need for the support of others that initiated this particular thread.  So, life is good for me.

I will come back after this coming Monday's grand event and report back on how I am doing and how things are going.

Hugs back to my northern friend,
Stevi

All the best, Stevi! I’m still dealing with after-affects of my surgery back in September. My case seems to be unusual, though. I’m sure you’ll have a much easier time than I have. I’ll be thinking of you on Monday!!


- Stephanie