Author Topic: Introduction  (Read 220 times)

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Online Iztaccihuatl

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Introduction
« on: February 14, 2019, 11:47:02 pm »
Hi everybody!

I just joined and would like to introduce myself. I am male assigned at birth, in my mid-fifties and trying to figure out where I stand. I definitively am a crossdresser, but I am wondering where on the scale between the occasional crossdresser and a transsexual I would fit in and whether full time / transitioning is in my future.

A few months ago I couldn't stand having secrets anymore and came out to my wife, who took the news better than expected, and while she is supportive, she is also struggling with it a lot. She is the only one among our families and friends who knows. I also started to see a gender therapist to get some help figuring things out. And going to therapy is also a chance to get out of the house dressed as a female.

I recently attended a meeting of a transgender support group about an hour away, which was another opportunity to get out as female. I enjoyed meeting other trans folks and after the meeting a few folks went to a local bar and although I would have really loved going with them, I chickened out at the last second for fear of running into somebody there whom I might know. Maybe the next time...

Again, glad to be here.

HM

Online Maid Marion

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #1 on: February 15, 2019, 12:07:10 am »
Hi HM,

Welcome!  Everyone is different so it can take a while to sort out.

Marion

Online Steph2.0

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #2 on: February 15, 2019, 12:39:07 am »
Hi HM, and welcome! I found Susan’s Place about two years ago, and it has been invaluable to me. Hopefully you’ll find it to be the same for you as you figure out where you’re going.

As an official greeter, it’s my pleasure to introduce you to our guidelines and rules. They keep our special place on the internet friendly and helpful for all of us. Give them a read and I think they’ll help you understand how everything works here.

Again, welcome! We’re all glad you’re here.

Stephanie

Things that you should read















Stephanie


Assigned male at birth 1958 * Began envying sister 1963 * Knew unquestioningly that I was female 1968 * Acted the male part for 50 years * Meltdown and first therapist session May 2017 * Began HRT 6/21/17 * Out to the world 10/13/17 * Name Change 12/7/2017 (Girl Harbor Day) * FFS With FacialTeam 12/4/2018 * GCS with Marci Bowers 9/25/2019

Offline LizK

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #3 on: February 15, 2019, 01:33:31 am »
Hi everybody!

I just joined and would like to introduce myself. I am male assigned at birth, in my mid-fifties and trying to figure out where I stand. I definitively am a crossdresser, but I am wondering where on the scale between the occasional crossdresser and a transsexual I would fit in and whether full time / transitioning is in my future.

A few months ago I couldn't stand having secrets anymore and came out to my wife, who took the news better than expected, and while she is supportive, she is also struggling with it a lot. She is the only one among our families and friends who knows. I also started to see a gender therapist to get some help figuring things out. And going to therapy is also a chance to get out of the house dressed as a female.

I recently attended a meeting of a transgender support group about an hour away, which was another opportunity to get out as female. I enjoyed meeting other trans folks and after the meeting a few folks went to a local bar and although I would have really loved going with them, I chickened out at the last second for fear of running into somebody there whom I might know. Maybe the next time...

Again, glad to be here.

HM


Hi Iztaccihuatl

Great to see you made it here. We have a vibrant community of all sorts of people going in both directions in various stages of transition from not at all and never will to others like myself who have completed their physical transition.  Lets not also forget the secion who are Significant others and come for support for a frioend or spouse who may be questioning or transitioning.There is a lot of help available from the basics of makeup through to surgery and hormone therapy. Many of our members are also non binary so as you can see we cater for everyone.

Hope you enjoy your time her

Liz
Transition Begun 25 September 2015
HRT since 17 May 2016,
Fulltime from 8 March 2017,
GCS 4 December 2018
Voice Surgery 01 February 2019

Online Alaskan Danielle

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #4 on: February 15, 2019, 09:00:30 am »
Hi everybody!

I just joined and would like to introduce myself. I am male assigned at birth, in my mid-fifties and trying to figure out where I stand. I definitively am a crossdresser, but I am wondering where on the scale between the occasional crossdresser and a transsexual I would fit in and whether full time / transitioning is in my future.

A few months ago I couldn't stand having secrets anymore and came out to my wife, who took the news better than expected, and while she is supportive, she is also struggling with it a lot. She is the only one among our families and friends who knows. I also started to see a gender therapist to get some help figuring things out. And going to therapy is also a chance to get out of the house dressed as a female.

I recently attended a meeting of a transgender support group about an hour away, which was another opportunity to get out as female. I enjoyed meeting other trans folks and after the meeting a few folks went to a local bar and although I would have really loved going with them, I chickened out at the last second for fear of running into somebody there whom I might know. Maybe the next time...

Again, glad to be here.

HM

@Iztaccihuatl 
Dear HM:
     I am so very glad that you have become a member here and this is your very first posting.   I am happy to see that you found the Susan's Place Forums.

    As you post on the forums you will be able to exchange thoughts and comments with others that are experiencing many of the same things that you are.   I expect that you will be getting many members offering their thoughts and suggestions as you continue to post here. 

    This is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say that may have been in your circumstances and with your questions and concerns.
    There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation and as you continue to feel free to share with all of us.

    Our lovely member @Steph2.0 had already welcomed you earlier
but please allow me to also warmly WELCOME you to Susan's Place
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.

    As you are certainly aware you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members.  When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. ....
     ***There is a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new like-minded friends here. 

    Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace.
   
    In Stephanie's welcome message she attached important and informative LINKS that will help you to navigate around the Forums and will allow you to enjoy the features here.     
Please look closely at the LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.

Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle

Offline Jessica

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #5 on: February 15, 2019, 09:48:48 am »
Hi HM, welcome to Susan’s Place!
It can be unnerving exposing yourself, such as the first time out with friends.  It gets easier each time going out au femme with others that are there to support one another, at least it did for me.
Good luck next time!

Hugs and smiles, Jessica

"If you go out looking for friends, you are going to find they are very scarce.  If you go out to be a friend, you'll find them everywhere."

Offline Stevi

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #6 on: February 15, 2019, 10:52:51 am »
HM,

Quote
A few months ago I couldn't stand having secrets anymore and came out to my wife, who took the news better than expected, and while she is supportive, she is also struggling with it a lot. She is the only one among our families and friends who knows. I also started to see a gender therapist to get some help figuring things out. And going to therapy is also a chance to get out of the house dressed as a female.

I wish you all the best in the journey that lies before you.  One of the best moves I made in my transition was to get my wife to a therapist, too.  As much as I wanted to discuss things with her, we both had problems with being open.  My wife needed to be able rant about how what I needed or was doing impacted her.  She had no one to talk to other than me.  She couldn't really be totally honest with me about the depth of her feelings and hurts.  While I was sympathetic, I inevitably was hurt when she did it and I became defensive.  When we made arrangements for her to see a therapist, one in association with my own therapist, not a gender therapist but knowledgeable of gender issues, she had someone to scream at who could reflect back and knowledgeably help her understand the whole picture without taking offense and reacting defensively.  Being a different therapist gave her the confidentiality so she could be open with him.

Welcome aboard,
Stevi


Offline Saha

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #7 on: February 15, 2019, 11:42:53 am »
I would echo what Stevi said, a therapist for your wife is important HM

Offline V M

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #8 on: February 15, 2019, 05:41:23 pm »
Hi HM  :icon_wave:

Welcome to Susan's Place  :)  Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

Superficial fanny kissing friends are a dime a dozen, a TRUE FRIEND however is PRICELESS

 
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Online Iztaccihuatl

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #9 on: February 16, 2019, 01:19:47 am »
Wow, what a nice welcome! Thanks to everybody who responded.

HM

Online Iztaccihuatl

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #10 on: February 16, 2019, 01:28:54 am »
I wish you all the best in the journey that lies before you.  One of the best moves I made in my transition was to get my wife to a therapist, too.  As much as I wanted to discuss things with her, we both had problems with being open.  My wife needed to be able rant about how what I needed or was doing impacted her.  She had no one to talk to other than me.  She couldn't really be totally honest with me about the depth of her feelings and hurts.  While I was sympathetic, I inevitably was hurt when she did it and I became defensive.  When we made arrangements for her to see a therapist, one in association with my own therapist, not a gender therapist but knowledgeable of gender issues, she had someone to scream at who could reflect back and knowledgeably help her understand the whole picture without taking offense and reacting defensively.  Being a different therapist gave her the confidentiality so she could be open with him.

Thanks, Stevi, for your input. My wife did come along to my first session with my therapist which turned out more like a couples counseling session. I think she wanted to check out the therapist to make sure they don't put me on a fast track towards transition. Other than that she has not voiced any need yet to see her own therapist. Well, in any case, I'll try to take things slowly and hopefully this gives her some time to adapt as well.

HM

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #11 on: February 16, 2019, 08:11:23 am »
Hey y'all :)

I just posted my first thread here, after I often read here over the last few years and was asked to introduce myself. susans.org helped me a lot through my transition, though I never registered here, but on german sites, which is my mothers language.

I am a 23 years old mtf transwoman, though I rarely use this term to describe myself anymore. I think the only one who should know about my past, is my boyfriend and even there I'm not sure how I want to handle it, when I'm post op.
After 3 years in HRT and a little longer living fulltime as a woman, I have to admit, that I made some mistakes, regarding my authencity. I made my happiness depending on a understanding of passing, which I best could describe as old fashioned womanhood. in my head was no room for my geeky site, or my bisexuality and a whole lot of other things. yes, I could embrace my femininity, but I lost other essential parts of me, I now want to get back.
as far as I could tell after this part, about living in "stealth mode“, this may be a rather long way ahead of me :x but I definetly want to take it, be my full true self and at least mostly let my anxiety behind.

I'm happy to be here 😊

Offline ChrissyRyan

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Re: Introduction
« Reply #12 on: February 16, 2019, 09:20:58 am »
Hi HM!


    Welcome!   :)


Chrissy
Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding. Accepting yourself as the woman you are is very liberating.
Never underestimate the appreciation and respect of authenticity. 

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