Author Topic: Mom of 16 year old  (Read 266 times)

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Offline wildwood

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Mom of 16 year old
« on: March 18, 2019, 09:21:26 pm »
Hello everyone,

Just wanted to take a moment to introduce myself.  My 16 year old, AMAB, revealed that she feels closer to a "she" than a "he" a few weeks ago.  She then promptly changed her school pronoun, from "they" to "she, they". It's a small school with several trans students, so that was remarkable easy.  In many circles we travel in, there are many LGBTQ people so that is really nice.  We are hoping to clue the grandparents in tomorrow before they hear over the grapevine.

We meet with a doctor next week to get more information about transitioning and at the least to start with some testosterone blockers. The good news, is that she is mid-puberty, still has a fairly feminine face and little facial hair.  She does have the deep voice, so that might be something that she chooses to address in the future.  Is seems a bit backward from the way many of the people on the board go about it.

This is a great resource thanks to everyone who participates.  Wild
« Last Edit: March 19, 2019, 10:29:45 am by wildwood »

Online Alaskan Danielle

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #1 on: March 18, 2019, 09:24:57 pm »
Hello everyone,

Just wanted to take a moment to introduce myself.  My 16 year old, AMAB, revealed that she feels closer to a "he" than a "she" a few weeks ago.  She then promptly changed her school pronoun, from "they" to "she, they". It's a small school with several trans students, so that was remarkable easy.  In many circles we travel in, there are many LGBTQ people so that is really nice.  We are hoping to clue the grandparents in tomorrow before they hear over the grapevine.

We meet with a doctor next week to get more information about transitioning and at the least to start with some testosterone blockers. The good news, is that she is mid-puberty, still has a fairly feminine face and little facial hair.  She does have the deep voice, so that might be something that she chooses to address in the future.  Is seems a bit backward from the way many of the people on the board go about it.

This is a great resource thanks to everyone who participates.  Wild

@wildwood
Dear Wild:
     I am so very glad that you have become a member here and that you found the Susan's Place Forums.

    As you continue to post on the forums you will be able to exchange thoughts and comments with others that are experiencing many of the same things that you are.   I expect that you will be getting many members offering their thoughts and suggestions as you continue to post here. 

     I am wishing your well with your 16 year old child... 
Do know that This is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say that may have been in your circumstances and with your questions and concerns.
    There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation and as you continue to feel free to share with all of us.
 
    I also want to warmly WELCOME you to Susan's Place
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.

    As you are certainly aware you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members.  When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. ....
     ***There is a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new like-minded friends here. 

    Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace.
   
    I have attached important and informative LINKS that will help you to navigate around the Forums and will allow you to enjoy the features here.     
Please look closely at the LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.

Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle


Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that all new members should be familiar with:
 
Things that you should read

Online Alaskan Danielle

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #2 on: March 18, 2019, 09:46:20 pm »
@wildwood
Dear Wild:
Here on the Susan's Place Forums we have a "YOUTH" section that is a safe and heavily moderated area for our younger members and for those that want to explore transition subjects for their children aimed at and written by other young members.
***I trust that you will find this helpful to you and your child.

          YOUTH TALK FORUMS
    https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,496.0.html


               YOUTH INTRODUCTIONS FORUM

         https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,544.0.html

Please feel free to gather as much information as you can...

Hugs and best wishes,
Danielle

Offline Dena

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #3 on: March 18, 2019, 09:55:54 pm »
Welcome to Susan's Place. There is no one way to transition because people feel dysphoria differently. Site members tend to address the issues they are most uncomfortable with first or as soon as they are permitted to. Issues they are less uncomfortable with tend to wait for latter.

I am one of the exceptions on the site because when I transitioned, we didn't have all the options available today. Things like FFS and voice surgery were well into the future so for the most part we just wanted bottom surgery. Both you and your child may ask for the information you need and we will do our best to supply it.

For somebody so young, blockers are a good place to start. It would sure reduce facial hair removal as well as halt other changes that are difficult to reverse. While some things may have to wait a couple of more years, there is still much to explore.
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Offline Rachel_Christina

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #4 on: March 19, 2019, 01:56:09 am »
What I would have done for acceptance like that :/

Fair play to you!!



Offline Tribble

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #5 on: March 19, 2019, 08:14:42 am »
Hello everyone,

Just wanted to take a moment to introduce myself.  My 16 year old, AMAB, revealed that she feels closer to a "he" than a "she" a few weeks ago.  She then promptly changed her school pronoun, from "they" to "she, they". It's a small school with several trans students, so that was remarkable easy.  In many circles we travel in, there are many LGBTQ people so that is really nice.  We are hoping to clue the grandparents in tomorrow before they hear over the grapevine.

We meet with a doctor next week to get more information about transitioning and at the least to start with some testosterone blockers. The good news, is that she is mid-puberty, still has a fairly feminine face and little facial hair.  She does have the deep voice, so that might be something that she chooses to address in the future.  Is seems a bit backward from the way many of the people on the board go about it.

This is a great resource thanks to everyone who participates.  Wild

Forgive me for being slightly confused by your first mentions of pronouns, but thank you for being an accepting parent.  That's one of the primary reasons so many of us wait for so long before stand up to reality.  I was lucky, though I transitioned a little later than some now, but many are not.

What I would have done for acceptance like that :/

Fair play to you!!

No doubt!

Offline AnneK

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #6 on: March 19, 2019, 08:51:38 am »
What I would have done for acceptance like that :/

Fair play to you!!

Me too, though when I was young I had no idea about trans etc.  I certainly had never heard of transitioning.  I just wanted to wear some of my sister's things, but was too terrified to say so.
I'm a 65 year old male who has been thinking about SRS for many years.  I also was a  full cross dresser for a few years.  I wear a bra, pantyhose and nail polish daily because it just feels right.

Started HRT April 17, 2019.

Offline randim

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #7 on: March 19, 2019, 09:22:55 am »
Hi wildwood.  It is heart-warming to see this level of parental support. It is really quite awesome. I know it must be difficult for you and your child, making such consequential decisions at such a relatively young age.  The world has changed so much for the better since I was a teen.  I think testosterone blockers are an excellent start.  That puts the brakes on male development and allows her to explore social transition.  In terms of physical development, the power of blocking testosterone cannot be overstated. It is powerful stuff that leaves lasting marks that no female needs. I'm guessing you're already hooked up with a gender therapist, but if not, I'd strongly encourage that as well.  Best of luck to both of you.

Offline wildwood

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #8 on: March 19, 2019, 10:33:44 am »
Forgive me for being slightly confused by your first mentions of pronouns, but thank you for being an accepting parent.  That's one of the primary reasons so many of us wait for so long before stand up to reality.  I was lucky, though I transitioned a little later than some now, but many are not.

No doubt!

Tribble, I see I mixed up my pronouns!  I have corrected it.  Thanks for pointing that out. (Hope this quote thing/ modify thing works) 

Offline Charlie Nicki

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #9 on: March 19, 2019, 11:11:23 am »
Welcome and congratulations for being a supportive and awesome parent.
Latina :) I speak Spanish, English and a bit of Portuguese.

Offline DawnOday

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #10 on: March 19, 2019, 01:17:44 pm »
Wildwood..Thanks for being supportive of your child. We need more people like you. Going to therapy is a great start. If you could make it and you live in the area there is a convention called "Keystone" in Harrisburg PA starting tomorrow through the 24th. If you live in the area, i guarantee it will be a great experience. It is basically a "How To" demonstration with a couple hundred other transgender folks, doctors, psychologists, and service providers. I was blessed to have been invited by a friend I made at one of my first support group meetings to "Gender Odyssey" shortly after I came out to my family. I didn't know what to expect exactly but when I showed up and there were 1700 other people just like me. I spent four days in public as my genuine self for the first time.It was the most affirming program and I will be thankful to Evie forever for making it possible. Good luck Mom. Thanks for showing the love.
Dawn Oday

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Offline Tribble

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #11 on: March 19, 2019, 01:52:03 pm »
Tribble, I see I mixed up my pronouns!  I have corrected it.  Thanks for pointing that out. (Hope this quote thing/ modify thing works)

I've seen cis people do it with other cis people, trans people with other trans people and every other combination...it happens. :)  The more one concentrates on pronouns, the easier it is for mix-ups to occur! :D

Again, thank you for being a supportive parent like mine were.  Fear of their reaction, as I'd eluded to, was one of the reasons I held back from saying anything when I was younger. 

And their/her school pronouns?!?  Wow.  That was not a thing I was aware of that was happening!  Youth today are fortunate, yet still, so much more can improve with society.  We're a long, long way from the finish line, but you and your child's school seem to be helping to move us forward.  Thank you.

Offline V M

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Re: Mom of 16 year old
« Reply #12 on: March 19, 2019, 02:32:51 pm »
Hi Wildwood  :icon_wave:

Welcome to Susan's Place  :)  Glad to have you here, join on in the fun

Hugs

V M
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