Community Conversation > Intersex talk

I need to talk to someone

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F_P_M:
pain so bad you can't get out of bed needs to be checked immediately!

Pain in that region could be a large number of things, you definitely need a doctor to feel your stomach and run a scan.

If your partner doesn't think it's important when you're in pain then he sounds like a douche. Sorry but, what sort of person doesn't get worried about their partner if they've been in bed three days!?? that's insane.

Get to a doctor, please!

F_P_M:
Okay Amore, i've had a think and i'm genuinely concerned about your situation. Your fiance you regularly mention controls the money and denies you medical care, demeans your fears and generally sounds honestly abusive. I'm worried for you.

A long time ago you posted this list:

They regularly demean or disregard your opinions, ideas, suggestions, or needs.

They use sarcasm or “teasing” to put you down or make you feel bad about yourself.

They accuse you of being “too sensitive” in order to deflect their abusive remarks.

They try to control you and treat you like a child.

They correct or chastise you for your behavior.

You feel like you need permission to make decisions or go out somewhere.

They try to control the finances and how you spend money.

 They try to make you feel as though they are always right, and you are wrong.

 They give you disapproving or contemptuous looks or body language.

They regularly point out your flaws, mistakes, or shortcomings.

 They accuse or blame you of things you know aren’t true.

They are intolerant of any seeming lack of respect.

They make excuses for their behavior, try to blame others, and have difficulty apologizing.

The repeatedly cross your boundaries and ignore your requests.

They blame you for their problems, life difficulties, or unhappiness.

They are emotionally distant or emotionally unavailable most of the time.

They resort to pouting or withdrawal to get attention or attain what they want.

They don’t show you empathy or compassion.

They play the victim and try to deflect blame to you rather than taking personal responsibility.

They disengage or use neglect or abandonment to punish or frighten you.

They don’t seem to notice or care about your feelings

They view you as an extension of themselves rather than as an individual.

 They share personal information about you with others.

They invalidate or deny their emotionally abusive behavior when confronted.

They make subtle threats or negative remarks with the intent to frighten or control you.


I would like you to revisit it. The things you say they ping warning signs.

Maybe i'm overreacting, maybe it's presumptuous, but please take care of yourself. You've been through hell and back, please, remember that you are worth the money, you're worth it ALL. It's just money but you, you are irreplaceable.

I'm worried about you Amore. And maybe that's wierd for a stranger but I am. Please stay safe.

Haley Conner:
See a doctor right away!  And don't waste your time and energy on someone who doesn't reciprocate.

Amoré:
Saw the doctor

On a set of antibiotics now feel like <not allowed> but got laughed at for just asking can I be intersex.

This is after I got bronchitis also and coughed my lungs out.

Doc was very unsympathetic like usual.

He tried to force a glove up there without lube and gave me a hemorrhoid also in the process. I told him to pull it out.

Well maybe I don't see it out of his perspective. I am sort of a wreck these days and I do think to much.

Haley Conner:
Have you compared the length of your index finger to your ring finger?  That can be a trait of intersexuality.  If your index finger is longer than your ring finger, that is a female hand, and could mean there was an androgen imbalance while you were in the womb or otherwise.  If a male fetus doesn't produce testosterone, it develops essentially as female, minus the tissues and organs determined by chromosomes.  If you are genetically intersex, it's more obvious and manifests in other ways. 

Some other tell-tale traits: Born with little or no male development, don't develop muscle mass easily, very flexible, able to cross legs twice, certain face shapes, certain speech affectations, and a bunch of other things.

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