Author Topic: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes  (Read 15236 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Online davina61

  • *
  • Posts: 4,453
  • Reputation: +12/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • The ramblings of an old dear
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #620 on: May 27, 2020, 10:58:34 am »
You need some fertilizer !! for the soul . XXXXXX look after yourself dear.
a long time coming (out) HRT 12 2017


Jill of all trades mistress of non
Know a bit about everything but not enough to be clever

Offline Rachel

  • Family
  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 7,268
  • Reputation: +62/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #621 on: May 29, 2020, 10:44:55 pm »
Hi Maddie,

I have to wear a mask at work and we are not allowed to wear makeup. I may have to wear eye shields so no eye makeup either. So in public at work I am behind a mask. When this all ends and I can wear makeup at work it will be like relearning all over again. It will be a bit awkward to wear makeup.

I agree being behind a mask is a bit like hiding. 
MTF in need of help link https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,133631.1980.html
MTF in need of help 2 link https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,251825.0.html
HRT  5-28-2013
FT   11-13-2015
FFS   9-16-2016 -Spiegel
GCS 11-15-2016 - McGinn
Hair Grafts 3-20-2017 - Cooley
Voice therapy start 3-2017 - Reene Blaker
Labiaplasty 5-15-2017 - McGinn
BA 7-12-2017 - McGinn
Hair grafts 9-25-2017 Dr.Cooley
Sataloff Cricothyroid subluxation and trachea shave12-11-2017
Dr. McGinn labiaplasty, hood repair, scar removal, graph repair and bottom of  vagina finished. urethra repositioned. 4-4-2018
Dr. Sataloff Glottoplasty 5-14-2018
Dr. McGinn vaginal in office procedure 10-22-2018
Dr. McGinn vaginal revision 2 4-3-2019 Bottom of vagina closed off, fat injected into the labia and urethra repositioned.

Online Maddie

  • Family
  • *
  • Posts: 1,789
  • Reputation: +12/-0
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #622 on: May 30, 2020, 08:52:13 am »
Trying not to give up.

I was told at an electro consult on Wed that I have been ripped off and possibly permanently damaged by the electrolgist I've been seeing since 2015.  It was also pointed out that going intermittently, (as I have done due to lack of steady $), is not effective.  This person also told me that I have do much dark hairs  that the 12 laser sessions I had (at a different place 2017-18) should have definitely cleared them.... If I had been to a better tech or laser.

This new electro did not seem to be trying to get me to come to her instead.  In fact, she didn't seem interested in taking on my face.

If I knew of an excellent electro that is absolutely effective  against thick curly beard hairs, and willing to work on mine, I will put together my plan to relocate there.  What I need to do is put together a ton of money first, so that there will be no more stops and starts in my treatment.

My problem there is that my lifetime experience was as a male entertainer who booked myself.  So still trying to reinvent myself in my late 40s with no experience.  So far no luck even finding min wage unskilled stuff. 

Something will happen..  The universe just keeps telling me it's not where I live now.
If you know what life is worth you will look for yours on Earth

Online CynthiaAnn

  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 10,867
  • Reputation: +12/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • like totally dig that pacific pulse....
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #623 on: May 30, 2020, 09:01:00 am »
Trying not to give up.


Good for you Maddie  :)

I'd recommend the electrolysis lady (ex nurse) I used here, except she's retired now  :) it's a most long and difficult road to facial smoothness, and good luck finding someone you can work with.

Hope your day is going well

C

kindness is love nurturing your soul....

Online Maddie

  • Family
  • *
  • Posts: 1,789
  • Reputation: +12/-0
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #624 on: May 30, 2020, 09:13:50 am »
I think I'm going to try a third opinion at Precision hair removal in Wilmette IL.  It's like 4 hrs from here. 
If that is another dead end, I may pack my car and figure it out wherever I land.
If you know what life is worth you will look for yours on Earth

Offline Ellie_Arroway

  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 976
  • Reputation: +18/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • ellie_arroway@susans.org
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #625 on: May 30, 2020, 10:58:07 am »
I think I'm going to try a third opinion at Precision hair removal in Wilmette IL.  It's like 4 hrs from here.

Wow... would that be sustainable?

I don't think it would be for me! - E
Started seriously questioning: 24 Aug 2019
Referred to GIC: 23 Sep 2019
Full-time female presentation since: 21 Oct 2019, unbroken since 12 Dec 2019
Official name change by deed poll: 11 Nov 2019
HRT: probably sometime in the 22nd century...
Most of my story is in the Just another mtf tale thread!
Twitch streamer MusicEllie

Online Maddie

  • Family
  • *
  • Posts: 1,789
  • Reputation: +12/-0
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #626 on: May 30, 2020, 11:56:58 am »
No, but I heard good things about them Ellie :)
If that's the way I go, there's no doubt a vacant apartment closer.
Many towns that way.

Plan to move, not run. 

Stop turn around 
Rewire the things stalling me.
Clean house
Keep on changing

Sometimes these days I want to throw my phone into the trees.  Even if it is my connection.

Watching what's coming up on it's own in the "garden"
None too promising, maybe a cilantro?  It's cute
If you know what life is worth you will look for yours on Earth

Offline Ellie_Arroway

  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 976
  • Reputation: +18/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • ellie_arroway@susans.org
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #627 on: May 30, 2020, 01:15:16 pm »
No, but I heard good things about them Ellie :)
If that's the way I go, there's no doubt a vacant apartment closer.
Many towns that way.

Plan to move, not run. 

Ah, that makes sense! - E
Started seriously questioning: 24 Aug 2019
Referred to GIC: 23 Sep 2019
Full-time female presentation since: 21 Oct 2019, unbroken since 12 Dec 2019
Official name change by deed poll: 11 Nov 2019
HRT: probably sometime in the 22nd century...
Most of my story is in the Just another mtf tale thread!
Twitch streamer MusicEllie

Online Wendi

  • *
  • Posts: 1,728
  • Reputation: +3/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #628 on: May 30, 2020, 02:15:36 pm »
My electrologist was charging $60 for an hour. I like her but when the virus hit she stopped. It's about 50 minutes away. I believe she's open back up but I haven't scheduled any more time with her.

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Started HRT 1/3/2019




Online Maddie

  • Family
  • *
  • Posts: 1,789
  • Reputation: +12/-0
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #629 on: May 30, 2020, 02:33:20 pm »
My electrologist was charging $60 for an hour. I like her but when the virus hit she stopped. It's about 50 minutes away. I believe she's open back up but I haven't scheduled any more time with her
$60/hr is same price I was paying for electro.
Wendi, do you know what method they were using on your face (Thermo, blend, galvanic?)

I will now require that a tech be good with curly hair follicle roots that sometimes aren't even close to straight down.
If you know what life is worth you will look for yours on Earth

Online Wendi

  • *
  • Posts: 1,728
  • Reputation: +3/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #630 on: May 30, 2020, 02:48:55 pm »
$60/hr is same price I was paying for electro.
Wendi, do you know what method they were using on your face (Thermo, blend, galvanic?)

I will now require that a tech be good with curly hair follicle roots that sometimes aren't even close to straight down.
I believe it was a blend method.

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Started HRT 1/3/2019




Online Maddie

  • Family
  • *
  • Posts: 1,789
  • Reputation: +12/-0
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #631 on: May 30, 2020, 10:04:34 pm »
Sorry still sorting my middle age reboot on this public thread.  It's taking a while. 

My life is so compartmentalized I forget I have other experience
Concrete, landscaper, painter, roofing, siding, insulator, sawyer, scrapyard, demolition, warehouse, more.
Hard work has not been the problem.  Heights can be.
I suffer from a lack of common sense, and a need to be directed.
Stress management.  The inevitable social prying out of what a sissy I am, and my place in the group.
Or acting like a psycho, but not entirely an act. And defense.

It might be less stressful to work with crews now, especially if I totally own who I am. 
Might help the more i resemble who I am.  Or not!

Entertainment strangely was easy to get work. Lots of it. Any time I put myself to it.   I don't even think I'm that good. 
Non essential now!!  Grateful I didn't spend months booking myself for this year! 
Sucks to let it go away now, but I'm not sure the market clamors for my current presentation.

And I'm kind of a techphobe.  It is a problem.
I might do ok dealing with people on the phone as a call center or similiar, but I don't know anything about that industry.

Stay healthy everybody
If you know what life is worth you will look for yours on Earth

Online davina61

  • *
  • Posts: 4,453
  • Reputation: +12/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • The ramblings of an old dear
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #632 on: May 31, 2020, 02:28:00 am »
So with all those talents/experience what about starting you own handy person business ?
a long time coming (out) HRT 12 2017


Jill of all trades mistress of non
Know a bit about everything but not enough to be clever

Online Maddie

  • Family
  • *
  • Posts: 1,789
  • Reputation: +12/-0
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #633 on: May 31, 2020, 04:15:05 am »
Thank you that is a logical suggestion!
Unfortunately I'm not handy  ;)   
I really have no common sense and need to be told every step of the way what to do. Even jobs I've done repeatedly.  No eye for what's going on and how to get it done..  At best a desire to comply and please the man I'm working for.
Was a fish out of water in all those jobs and rarely lasted long with any employer.
The only thing that stuck was performing music, something that is kept a hobby by most sane people.

It is  true I did stuff and learned a little.
Might do ok if I figured a way to specialize  in something with a demand, and just know those tasks really well.

« Last Edit: May 31, 2020, 08:53:44 am by Maddie »
If you know what life is worth you will look for yours on Earth

Online Maddie

  • Family
  • *
  • Posts: 1,789
  • Reputation: +12/-0
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #634 on: May 31, 2020, 04:38:36 am »
Oh God.  Seeing news.
Glad I'm not in the inner city anymore.

Hope you're not caught up in the riots
If you know what life is worth you will look for yours on Earth

Online CynthiaAnn

  • *****
  • *
  • Posts: 10,867
  • Reputation: +12/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • like totally dig that pacific pulse....
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #635 on: May 31, 2020, 07:01:11 am »
Oh God.  Seeing news.
Glad I'm not in the inner city anymore.

Hope you're not caught up in the riots

My take away from watching our local coverage of downtown Seattle last night, there are essentially two groups, first the peaceful and organized protestors, and then you had the anarchists that are exploiting the situation for no good. They move in amongst the peaceful protestors, looting and causing destruction that solves nothing, and simply causing more pain for businesses that are already closed because of the virus. The message is lost in the violence, feels and smells like '68 again...

what a mess,

Anyway good morning Maddie, hope you are staying well and safe.



kindness is love nurturing your soul....

Online Wendi

  • *
  • Posts: 1,728
  • Reputation: +3/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #636 on: May 31, 2020, 07:14:11 am »
It's sickening how African American people are still treated in our world.

I was going to go to a demonstration today to support George Floyd but I've reconsidered because of the violence that is popping up at many demonstrations.

It's so sad. I can't imagine living in this world as a human with color.

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Started HRT 1/3/2019




Online Maddie

  • Family
  • *
  • Posts: 1,789
  • Reputation: +12/-0
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #637 on: June 01, 2020, 10:05:38 am »
On the block for this week

Will ask three  specific people I personally know (and get me as I am now) who may be able to help my employment situation.

Meet with HRT doctor and get blood draw and figure my levels out

Follow-up and contact two clinics for hair removal that I've been referred to.  Will arrange consults and get expert opinions on the work that has been done on my face to this point, and assess the damage to my skin.

Phone or vid appts with not one but 2 counselors.  One is writing one of my letters of readiness for SRS.  The other gave me a psych type workbook a couple years ago that I've been painfully working through during the shutdown.

Sing with a band that is rehearsing for their first time in months.  They are in the same city as the Drs blood lab.  One runs a property maintenance business that I have worked for  (didn't really work out, he usually just employs struggling addicts).  Two of the band guys knew me as another person, but seem ok with me now.  The others don't know me.  Probably just a oneshot for me, as I'm generally trying to avoid that city these days. 
I might wear a wig to rehearsal :)

If you know what life is worth you will look for yours on Earth

Offline randim

  • *
  • Posts: 634
  • Reputation: +6/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #638 on: June 01, 2020, 10:08:40 am »
Wow, That's quite a full plate.  Those are all big steps, and good luck with all of them.  You are going to be a tired girl by the end of the week.

Online Wendi

  • *
  • Posts: 1,728
  • Reputation: +3/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: Ms Maddie's Garden of Changes
« Reply #639 on: June 01, 2020, 10:44:57 am »
That sounds like good steps especially because they already accept you as you are.

Good luck!

Hugs

Sent from my SM-G986U using Tapatalk

Started HRT 1/3/2019




Tags: