Author Topic: Does it really get better just wondering  (Read 1835 times)

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Offline MunaFan86

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Does it really get better just wondering
« on: June 26, 2019, 11:15:39 pm »
as in emotional and being lonely does someone eventually find someone?

Offline Make97

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #1 on: October 17, 2020, 07:50:28 am »
The way I see it, you don't just meet people, you have to search for them a little. I was lonely, most of my adult life, but now married to most loving man. All because I made an effort to get to know him. I still don't have that much friends but quality is more important than number of friends me thinks. Hugs for you, I really hope it gets easier for you!
"Mä oon sitä mitä haluan olla mut vaikee välillä haluta olla"

Julma Henri

Offline SarahEL

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #2 on: October 17, 2020, 08:03:43 am »
There is an old adage,   Don't ask for friendships, be friendly and they will appear....

 I believe it works in ALL relationships.. It did for me!
Oh, life is bigger,  It's bigger Than you and you are not me
The lengths that I will go to.  The distance in your eyes

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Offline Sophiaprincess2019

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #3 on: October 17, 2020, 08:43:14 am »
as in emotional and being lonely does someone eventually find someone?

I think this question really depends on whether or not you are ready to meet someone. Generally people tend to shy away from those who appear broken or in distress. When I'm actively "looking" or open to the idea of dating, I seek  men who are over their ex, have their stuff (life) together and willing to out forth the effort to develop a relationship. I'm pretty in tune with detecting if someone has issues with their confidence and I don't feel it's my place to rescue or help those who need to be consoled since I'm not a professional therapist, nor do I seek to be one in my romantic relationships. I want a man who is my equal, my partner in life, my friend, lover, but mine overall.

You'll find someone when you're ready; like anything, it's going to take time!


Sophia
1968 Assigned male at birth with feminine mannerisms
1978 Dolls and dresses
1988 Experimental stage, limited makeup and clothes
1998 Denial continues, unsuccessfully tried living as a man
12-8-2018 time for a change....
2-21-2019 Started HRT
2-21-2020 One year HRT
2-21-2021 Two years HRT

Offline Northern Star Girl

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #4 on: October 17, 2020, 11:10:20 am »
There is an old adage,   Don't ask for friendships, be friendly and they will appear....

 I believe it works in ALL relationships.. It did for me!
@SarahEL
Dear Sarah:
Yes indeed:   
"If you want friends, be friendly,  Be the first to say hello and to greet, and even start a casual conversation."

"If you go out looking for friends, you are going to find they are very scarce.  If you go out to be a friend, you'll find them everywhere."
(This is found on my good forum's friend profile, @Jessica)
HUGS,
Danielle


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Offline ChrissyRyan

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #5 on: October 17, 2020, 11:19:29 am »
@SarahEL
Dear Sarah:
Yes indeed:   
"If you want friends, be friendly,  Be the first to say hello and to greet, and even start a casual conversation."

"If you go out looking for friends, you are going to find they are very scarce.  If you go out to be a friend, you'll find them everywhere."
(This is found on my good forum's friend profile, @Jessica)
HUGS,
Danielle


Sometimes friends seem to come out of nowhere.  You just never know.  Often they come about from being introduced or when you mingle at a gathering.  They may not become a real friend right away.  Close friends are rare for most people.

It not important to have lots of friends but it is very nice to have at least one very close friend. 

Chrissy
« Last Edit: October 17, 2020, 11:35:40 am by Northern Star Girl »
Be a good example of good behavior.  Always be kinder than needed.  Be tender to others.  You are as beautiful as the thoughts you think and the words that you speak.   Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding.  Knowledge and action shown without love is not impressive.  If you look for the good in people you will find it. Healthy relationships are so important to good living.  Serve others.

Good living, joy, unity, love, and happiness can come from following these practices: Never let selfishness or conceit motivate you.  Regard others as more important than yourself.  Do not limit attention to only your interests, but include the interests of others

It is not usually about how fast you transition, it is about how well you transition.  
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I am a brown eyed brunette.

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #6 on: October 17, 2020, 12:28:38 pm »
Sometimes friends seem to come out of nowhere.  You just never know.  Often they come about from being introduced or when you mingle at a gathering.  They may not become a real friend right away.  Close friends are rare for most people.

It not important to have lots of friends but it is very nice to have at least one very close friend. 

Chrissy
For me one key is to be out there, create opportunities to make friends and be friendly to people. Of course good friends only come from a compatibility that is sensed rather than expressed.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Offline ChrissyRyan

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #7 on: March 29, 2021, 07:42:00 am »
For me one key is to be out there, create opportunities to make friends and be friendly to people. Of course good friends only come from a compatibility that is sensed rather than expressed.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


We should all be friendly.  When I think of friends and friendship, I do think of serendipity.  It can just happen and it may become a very mutually beneficial relationship.

Never give up.

Chrissy

Be a good example of good behavior.  Always be kinder than needed.  Be tender to others.  You are as beautiful as the thoughts you think and the words that you speak.   Always stay cheerful, be polite, kind, and understanding.  Knowledge and action shown without love is not impressive.  If you look for the good in people you will find it. Healthy relationships are so important to good living.  Serve others.

Good living, joy, unity, love, and happiness can come from following these practices: Never let selfishness or conceit motivate you.  Regard others as more important than yourself.  Do not limit attention to only your interests, but include the interests of others

It is not usually about how fast you transition, it is about how well you transition.  
.

I am a brown eyed brunette.

Offline Nikita

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #8 on: March 31, 2021, 06:12:11 pm »
"It" doesn't get better. 

You get better.

Or you don't change and so nothing changes, for better or worse.

Offline big kim

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #9 on: April 01, 2021, 02:57:15 am »
It hasn't got better for me. Been single since 2005

Offline OzChick

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #10 on: April 20, 2021, 09:24:19 pm »
Hi

I think Nikita makes a good point. After I transitioned publicly and hormonally I went through a period of adjustment presenting as a woman. I had to learn a lot of new ways of doing things or, saying it another way, I had to unlearn many of the things that I did when I presented as a man. In a way, I reinvented myself as the woman I always was. I also had to let the disphoria fade so that it wasn't so important in my life. Once I had done that I was a more balanced and confident person and because of that it has been easier to interact with others. I've certainly noticed that other people interact better with me. I'm slowly meeting people now and getting friendly. So, like Nikita said in her post above, 'it' doesn't get better until 'you' get better. It got better for me when I got better. I think self improvement might be the key. It was for me anyway.

regards

OzChick

Offline Emileeeee

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #11 on: April 21, 2021, 08:07:06 am »
I don't know about the relationship front. I've had guys approach me and I have hooked up with a couple, but there are so many that just want to fulfill a fetish that it's put me on edge about all of them. I've probably passed up on some good ones because of that.

As far as friends go, they just kind of found me. I joined groups for things I enjoy doing and extroverts adopted me. Over time, we became close friends.

Offline Maid Marion

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Re: Does it really get better just wondering
« Reply #12 on: April 22, 2021, 05:10:06 am »
I meet a lot more people randomly with my female presentation.

I just got a complaint from a GG that my Facebook profile was ancient.
I recall that ages ago she was only  interested in really tall guys.
Height still plays an unreasonably big factor in starting relationships.
As in they won't actually look at you  if your height is outside some totally arbitrary standard.
Before  I was on the outside.

If height is an issue you may need to explore venues in which being brushed off at first isn't the end of the story.

Marion

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