Community Conversation > Significant Others talk

Telling my wife

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MikaelaA:
Good luck, I hope it goes well for you.  Try to be as positive as you can, she may very well be supportive.  Also understand that after she reads your letter she will more than likely have just as much anxiety as you.  At the very least you have our support.

Jaymilynn:

--- Quote from: MichelleA on January 14, 2020, 09:00:14 am ---Good luck, I hope it goes well for you.  Try to be as positive as you can, she may very well be supportive.  Also understand that after she reads your letter she will more than likely have just as much anxiety as you.  At the very least you have our support.

--- End quote ---

I am extremely thankful for that support as well. Something my cousin brought up (I came out to her yesterday) is the possibility of if going wrong and her not wanting me there. Trying to plan for the worst now and come up with a place to crash. I don’t really have any female friends that would be able to and I know that my male friends would ask questions and I’m not ready to come out completely socially yet.

Wendi:

--- Quote from: Jaymilynn on January 14, 2020, 07:39:43 am ---Well, I have decided that I’m going to give her a letter to explain what’s going on. I wrote a 4 page letter this morning and more than likely I’m going to give it to her this weekend. I’ve got to get this out in the open. I feel like I’m lying and deceiving her. I’ll be sitting next to her when she reads it so I can answer any questions she might have. Wish me luck. Thanks again for the advise and the support.

--- End quote ---
How was your wife's response to the letter,?

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Jaymilynn:

--- Quote from: Wendi on January 30, 2020, 09:40:04 pm ---How was your wife's response to the letter,?

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--- End quote ---

Well, I made it about 1/4 the way through and she turned into Reagan from the exorcist. After she calmed down I read her the letter. She went back and forth a few days and she still has her days of doubt but overall it’s been extremely positive. Our relationship since I came out has improved 10 fold and it also brought up some feelings she had buried fell the past. Some feelings about her own sexuality. I think we are going to be ok. She’s still worried about how to deal with the physical changes. Mostly socially but some in the bed room. She is open minded and willing to give it a shot for us. Even if she doesn’t stay with me as my wife she still plans to stay with me as basically a roommate and support me. She did say that after my legal name change and if she is able to cope with me after surgery, she wants us to get a divorce and remarry with my new name. Basically rededicating our lives to one another. She is truly an amazing woman.

RandiL:
That's about the best news I can imagine!

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