Author Topic: Pammie’s all new blog  (Read 14206 times)

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Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #600 on: September 15, 2020, 04:16:11 am »
Sorry to hear this Pammie - Hugs to you.. With some people you just can not do right for doing wrong.....So your best doing what you think is best and damn the torpedo's...
Thank you! I think u r absolutely right! Xxx


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Offline Emma1017

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #601 on: September 15, 2020, 06:50:48 am »
Just another hug from me :).

Have a wonderful day,

Emma
  The heart has reasons that reason can not understand.

             My Transgender Manifesto

Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #602 on: September 15, 2020, 12:57:17 pm »
Just another hug from me :).

Have a wonderful day,

Emma
Thanks Emma  - hugs keep me going xxx


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Offline Sephirah

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #603 on: September 15, 2020, 02:01:54 pm »
Some days are just horrible - just yet another trial when I keep hoping I’ve gone through enough.
As if realising i’m trans wasn’t enough, then my beautiful first born Siobhan died aged just 34. Learning to cope with that and changing my whole life style to spend every weekend with my son in law and the 2 boys who lost their mummy. - 260 miles every weekend. But no, still not enough. My daughter in law doesn’t like the fact i’m coming up to Teesside to help with the boys and prioritising that over spending time with them. Now i’m a <not allowed> parent too it seems.
Sometimes there are just too many hurdles to manage.


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Pammie, I'm going to tell you why you shouldn't give two hoots to what your daughter in law thinks, okay?

My dad left when I was 6 years old, leaving my mum to raise 3 kids by herself. I know it isn't close to the same thing, but the effect was similar. The biggest stabilising influence in my life throughout my childhood, until I went away to sea, was my granddad. He stepped in to fill a surrogate parent role. And in doing so, he did a lot for both his daughter and her kids. I owe a lot of who I am to him. I could have turned out to be an angry, hateful person.

What you're doing... is the right thing. The best thing. And somewhere down the road, your grandkids will be thankful and appreciative of it. Your son, too. Forget all this BS about not being a good parent... what you're doing... sweetie, you are the best kind of parent and I wish there were more in the world like you.

Don't let petty jealousy get you down, okay? Keep doing what you're doing. Because as a kid raised in that kind of environment... let me tell you... it helps more than you will ever know. You are a very beautiful, kind, gentle person. Very maternal. Keep being you, okay?

*massive hugs*

Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #604 on: September 15, 2020, 02:59:13 pm »
Pammie, I'm going to tell you why you shouldn't give two hoots to what your daughter in law thinks, okay?

My dad left when I was 6 years old, leaving my mum to raise 3 kids by herself. I know it isn't close to the same thing, but the effect was similar. The biggest stabilising influence in my life throughout my childhood, until I went away to sea, was my granddad. He stepped in to fill a surrogate parent role. And in doing so, he did a lot for both his daughter and her kids. I owe a lot of who I am to him. I could have turned out to be an angry, hateful person.

What you're doing... is the right thing. The best thing. And somewhere down the road, your grandkids will be thankful and appreciative of it. Your son, too. Forget all this BS about not being a good parent... what you're doing... sweetie, you are the best kind of parent and I wish there were more in the world like you.

Don't let petty jealousy get you down, okay? Keep doing what you're doing. Because as a kid raised in that kind of environment... let me tell you... it helps more than you will ever know. You are a very beautiful, kind, gentle person. Very maternal. Keep being you, okay?

*massive hugs*
Thank you so much! That does help and I think I know I just need to keep doing my best - loving my hugs xxxx


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Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #605 on: September 20, 2020, 01:26:44 pm »
Yesterday evening was spent with my niece who was my Siobhan’s cousin and best friend. We reminisced and discussed just how hard it is for both of us that Siobhan’s wonderful hubby now has a girlfriend.
I’m working so hard to embrace that and be supportive but it’s not easy. We both agreed our life’s have changed forever.

The fact is that upto the day before my little girl died I thought discovering I was trans and then transitioning would be the biggest challenges of my life but I was so wrong.
Losing Siobhan stripped everything else away and just left the pure, simple Pammie.
I stopped worrying about what people thought because it didn’t matter.
I’ve noticed the last few months I’ve started worrying about passing again so I’ve given myself a  mental slap because it really is not important.
So i’m just me, this is the real me and my Granpam role is the single biggest thing in my life. Love being a grandma.
Going to try to not forget that passing is a triviality.


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Offline davina61

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #606 on: September 20, 2020, 02:06:44 pm »
Never bothered me as didn't expect to pass ever , then found I do sometimes!!!
a long time coming (out) HRT 12 2017


Jill of all trades mistress of non
Know a bit about everything but not enough to be clever

Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #607 on: September 20, 2020, 04:33:00 pm »
Never bothered me as didn't expect to pass ever , then found I do sometimes!!!
Which must be nice even if it’s not something you worry about.
I’m going to try to not focus on passing and just remember what is really important is to make the most of life while we can x


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Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #608 on: September 21, 2020, 05:01:19 pm »
Definitely in a difficult period right now - so many challenges but still trying to smile



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Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #609 on: September 22, 2020, 03:44:21 pm »
One last warm day so making the most of it with a walk into town to organise my top-up laser hair removal



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Offline CaelaNotKayla

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #610 on: September 22, 2020, 03:55:03 pm »
One last warm day so making the most of it with a walk into town to organise my top-up laser hair removal



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I love your outfit today! I wish I had the legs to pull off a short dress!

Caela
My Blog Thread - The Chronicles of Caela

In a sky full of people, only some want to fly. Isn't that crazy? - Seal

Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #611 on: September 22, 2020, 04:17:49 pm »
I love your outfit today! I wish I had the legs to pull off a short dress!

Caela
Awwww thanks! Legs are my best asset so I do try to emphasise- distracts from my less good features (of which there are too many!) xx


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Offline davina61

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #612 on: September 22, 2020, 04:20:32 pm »
Looking great Pam, thermals on tomorrow!!
a long time coming (out) HRT 12 2017


Jill of all trades mistress of non
Know a bit about everything but not enough to be clever

Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #613 on: September 22, 2020, 04:37:02 pm »
Looking great Pam, thermals on tomorrow!!
I know! I was making the most of one last warm day!

Thanks Hun! Xx


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Offline Pammie

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Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #614 on: September 23, 2020, 12:13:36 pm »
So I was feeling mischievous today and in the mood to tempt my boyfriend to come over to make the most of lunchtime! So I sent him this pic

I know, i’m such a wanton hussy!


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Offline davina61

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #615 on: September 23, 2020, 12:52:09 pm »
oh matron!!!
a long time coming (out) HRT 12 2017


Jill of all trades mistress of non
Know a bit about everything but not enough to be clever

Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #616 on: September 23, 2020, 01:32:12 pm »
oh matron!!!




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Offline Ellie_Arroway

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #617 on: September 24, 2020, 03:36:06 pm »
Hehehe, Pammie, and you shared that pic here for the rest of the world to see  ;D ;D ;D

Just one thing I would like to say... NEVER berate yourself for doing your best. Your best is the best you can do. And that happens to be whatever you do.

I enjoyed a beer in the garden around tea time. It wasn't the warmest day ever, but it wasn't bad. I think temperatures are about to take a nose dive though...

Ellie
Started seriously questioning: 24 Aug 2019
Referred to GIC: 23 Sep 2019
Full-time female presentation since: 21 Oct 2019, unbroken since 12 Dec 2019
Official name change by deed poll: 11 Nov 2019
HRT: "kind of" started 15 Jul 2020
Most of my story is in the Just another mtf tale thread!
Twitch streamer MusicEllie

Offline Pammie

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #618 on: September 24, 2020, 05:18:38 pm »
Hehehe, Pammie, and you shared that pic here for the rest of the world to see  ;D ;D ;D

Just one thing I would like to say... NEVER berate yourself for doing your best. Your best is the best you can do. And that happens to be whatever you do.

I enjoyed a beer in the garden around tea time. It wasn't the warmest day ever, but it wasn't bad. I think temperatures are about to take a nose dive though...

Ellie
Sadly right re temperature and yep, i’m a naughty girl at heart. Today was a good day - my favourite thing of all - Hairdressers visit! Michelle is my hairdresser and my confidant



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Offline Ellie_Arroway

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Re: Pammie’s all new blog
« Reply #619 on: September 25, 2020, 12:25:37 pm »
Sadly right re temperature and yep, i’m a naughty girl at heart. Today was a good day - my favourite thing of all - Hairdressers visit! Michelle is my hairdresser and my confidant

Nice!

That's actually an experience I have never had, and I probably will never have ... although one never knows!

My mum cut my hair up until my 20s and then I took over by buzzing it.

Male pattern baldness does seem to be starting to reverse (finasteride), but I suspect it will be years or never before I have anywhere near adequate growth on the sunroof...
Started seriously questioning: 24 Aug 2019
Referred to GIC: 23 Sep 2019
Full-time female presentation since: 21 Oct 2019, unbroken since 12 Dec 2019
Official name change by deed poll: 11 Nov 2019
HRT: "kind of" started 15 Jul 2020
Most of my story is in the Just another mtf tale thread!
Twitch streamer MusicEllie

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