Pammie, the last time I lived in a city, I rode the subway home just before midnight. At that time of the night, the subway is filled with people working four jobs to just keep one nostril above the water, as I was. So, each day makes a husk out of you and no VISA commercial can fill you in its thirty seconds. I had to keep my head down because I can read nonverbal cues, so it was brutal to recognize my fellow husks. At such moments, sadness is a kindness, for people do like to be seen and known, as trans-people know perhaps more than any other group.