Author Topic: Longest you've held off transitioning  (Read 596 times)

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Offline ashley7

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Longest you've held off transitioning
« on: June 16, 2020, 10:50:01 pm »
It's been 6 years since I've known I'm transgender and I've done nothing about it. I can't do anything about it. I don't have the money, willpower or confidence to do it. I have anxiety about going out. I don't have a job for the same reasons, so I can't afford makeup or facial hair removal. Worse yet, my parents are against it, and so they refuse to help me. My dad said I can do it, if I do it on my own. But I can't do it on my own, I need support. I need motivation to go out there and get it done! It's been 6 miserable years of holding out.

Offline Daylight

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Re: Longest you've held off transitioning
« Reply #1 on: June 16, 2020, 11:43:02 pm »
Ashley, I'm sorry you seem to be struggling so much. Six years is a long time, and not having a supportive family makes everything harder.

Can you find anyone near you that could be a resource to help you find things you can do? I'm not sure where you live, but for example, I live in California and have been on Medicaid that allows me free access to therapy and would cover hormones plus many surgeries. If I couldn't get the care I need that way, there are organizations that provide assistance from easy access to hormone prescriptions, to free and next to free therapy, to advice on finding government programs. I also have taken advantage of workforce centers that help with finding jobs.

I hope you are able to find someone that can give you some guidance. I don't think being transgender is ever easy but some places do have great resources these days. Of course, I have no idea where you actually are and if those types of things are available to you. I hope you learn about some you didn't know of and can make a plan to get to a life you want.
39 years old and learning to be Megan :)

Offline Julielynn

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Re: Longest you've held off transitioning
« Reply #2 on: June 17, 2020, 05:29:02 am »
24 years.   I knew what I needed to do back when I was 22.   I decided to wait until I had enough money to not go through the problems that some people run into due to transitioning at work.   I probably should have just bucked up and done it anyway, but fear is a thing.

Offline Gertrude

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Re: Longest you've held off transitioning
« Reply #3 on: June 17, 2020, 08:19:42 am »
Knew who I was at 4 and at 58 I still haven't transitioned. It get harder as one ages.

Offline Allie Jayne

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Re: Longest you've held off transitioning
« Reply #4 on: June 17, 2020, 04:37:02 pm »
65 years, I have always known I was female, but never been able to realise my true self. Survival and not hurting loved ones were my reasons, and there were many points along the way I nearly decided to transition, but didn't. In the end it was decided for me as my dysphoria made me seriously sick, and my doctor actually told me I had to transition or die.

Hugs,

Allie

Offline Sophiaprincess2019

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Re: Longest you've held off transitioning
« Reply #5 on: June 17, 2020, 07:30:08 pm »
Took me 49 years to finally pull it together. Once I got started I never looked back. Best decision I ever made, hands down.
1968 Assigned male at birth with feminine mannerisms
1978 Dolls and dresses
1988 Experimental stage, limited makeup and clothes
1998 Denial continues, unsuccessfully tried living as a man
12-8-2018 time for a change....
2-21-2019 Started HRT
2-21-2020 One year HRT
2-21-2021 Two years HRT

Offline TSL_NB

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Re: Longest you've held off transitioning
« Reply #6 on: June 19, 2020, 04:19:16 pm »
For me, I'd say 35 years....I had come to an absolute realisation when I was 11, but I was 'caught' and an attempt was made to beat it out of me (quite literally).

Years later, with a family who I love very, very much, I finally accepted, after all of those years, I'm not a mistake...I'm NOT the one with a problem. :)

Ashley, hang in there.  :)
It took over 40 years to realise, and believe, that what I am NOT, is a mistake.

(Yes, I'm a Canadian who served in the US Navy....)


Offline pamelatransuk

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Re: Longest you've held off transitioning
« Reply #7 on: June 20, 2020, 12:32:30 pm »
Just like the last four posters, I have known since childhood but took no positive action all my working life.

I told my grandmother aged 4 I wanted to be a girl but only started transition aged 62  - hence 58 years - but at last I am happy.

Hugs

Pamela xx

Offline CarlyMcx

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Re: Longest you've held off transitioning
« Reply #8 on: June 21, 2020, 08:52:02 pm »
34 years, not counting the 15 years in childhood when I knew I was a girl but did not know transition was possible.

1st attempt at transitioning, 1982, age 19.

2nd attempt, 1989, age 26.

3rd attempt, 1998-99 age 36.

4th attempt, 2016, age 53, got it right this time.

Hugs, Carly