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Northern Star Girl:
Dear Laura:
Reading your last update here on your Blog thread that you just posted tonight made me
very, very sad....  your heartfelt words tugged at my heart and caused me tearful distress
on your behalf.... 
....along with the rest of your avid followers here, I am one of your biggest fans and I am
always rooting for you happiness and success as the person that you have become.

You need know for sure that you are not an OUTCAST here on the Susan's Place Forums.
This is the place that you have unconditional acceptance and are "surrounded" by many of
your like-minded Forum's friends here.

I am sending you my big and tight HUG.....

I have no words or advice regarding your tennis club activities but I hope and trust that
you can find ways to rectify your difficult and heart wrenching situation. 

Best wishes to you... and I will be continuing to eagerly look for and read your updates
on your Blog thread and your other postings around the Forums.

If you wish you can always communicate with me via Forums PM
or through my email


Laura, you've attempted to be just one of the girls in your tennis league at a terrible time. The issue of transwomen competing against cis-females in sports seems to be in the news everyday.

In the end, I'm sad for you because you're hurting.

Laura, I feel for you. It's really sad that these people feel a need to single you out for abuse like this

In a way, I'm following you down this path. This summer I will enter the Pikes Peak Ascent footrace as a woman. I don't know what blowback, if any, I may face. There aren't many 65-69 year old women stupid enough to enter this race, so there's a reasonable chance I could place in the top 3 in my age group. I kinda hope I don't.

Take care and know that we care about you.

My smartphone thinks it's smarter than me. It's probably right.

January 28, 2022

I usually only drink socially, but tonight my companion is a bottle of Chardonney. I need the comfortable buzz and hopefully it will lull me to sleep early so i can escape the event horizon, which is calling.

After last Wednesday's interleague match, which LouieMay and i easily won, i asked her to be my partner next year. she didn't reply and later Yeng told me that her answer would be "no." She was my only prospect so this is looking like my first and only interleague season.

Yeng and i play my bully and her partner in next week's Interleague match, and while i'd considered getting a sub so i could avoid being around the Mean Girl, i decided to play. Now, Mean Girl and Yeng are both popular with the other women and both are often asked to play in various foursomes. I'm never asked to play. Ever. Yesterday, Yeng and the Mean Girl were invited to play in a large round-robin social play day with the country club team in town. They were paired together and played three sets, winning all three.

Afterwards, Yeng told me that Mean Girl was very nice and that i should "give her a chance." she repeated this same phrase when we played this morning. it destroyed the remainder of the day for me. How could my partner, my best friend, not understand how afraid i am of my primary bully, this Mean Girl who has attacked me? This mean girl who, if she complains about me again, could get me suspended from the league? Sure, i get that Yeng and others think Mean Girl is a nice person, but then they're all cis-gender. It's me, the transgirl, who is being attacked. With all the personal stories i've shared with Yeng with the attacks i've faced the past nine months, how could she now side with my bully and not understand how afraid i am?

It takes every ounce of bravery to go out in the world each day, bravery to pretend to ignore those who stare at me because i don't pass, bravery to not appear shocked when someone deadnames me on purpose. Until now, i thought Yeng understood. She doesn't though and that scares me because she thinks i'm being unreasonable for being scared. I fear for our friendship.

Rachel Montgomery:
If she is your friend (and I feel sure that she is), you should talk to her and tell her how you feel.  Ask her what she was suggesting by “give her a chance”?  Maybe, the mean girl expressed regret for how she has treated you.  I can’t imagine why she would say that given what you have told us here, but if she is your friend, talk to her.  Explain your fear.


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