Author Topic: I am back  (Read 161 times)

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Offline PeterSteele

  • "I was fine, until I was born. And it's been downhill ever since."
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I am back
« on: September 17, 2020, 12:10:25 pm »
     
          Trigger Warning:  Sexual Abuse, Self Harm and Suicide References


So, I've been in CPS since March 21st 2019 and been trapped in lock down treatment facilities for depression and sexual abuse since June 12th 2019 to August 31st 2020. Life has been crazy and depression has been horrible. I got beat up by the girls a lot, got sexually abused at a mental hospital, cut myself a lot, and tried killing myself twice. I still wish I was a boy even though now I say that I don't. I still am insecure and hate myself. I have way too much self hatred its kinda scary. I am now 17 years old and in a foster home. I don't know what to say honestly. I am just very lonely and I feel the treatment was worthless. 
« Last Edit: September 17, 2020, 02:52:05 pm by Northern Star Girl »
Peter Steele Θ

Offline Northern Star Girl

  • Previously Alaskan Danielle
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Re: I am back
« Reply #1 on: September 17, 2020, 12:19:40 pm »
@PeterSteele
Dear Peter:
Welcome back and I am so glad that you are OK and are posting again here on the
Forums.

In a short while I will post a new and updated Welcome Message to you with the latest
information an important LINKS to the rules and policies here.

Hang on, it is coming soon.


HUGS,
Danielle
***SEE MY LINKS BELOW
The Ramblings of a Northern*Star Girl
A New Chapter: ALASKAN DANIELLE's Chronicles
I am the HUNTED PREY: Danielle’s Chronicles
Things change re: ALASKAN DANIELLE
Positive Mindset... put away negativity

Started HRT:   March 2015
Went Full-Time    December 2016
Quit my male-mode job and relocated to a very small town in Alaska in January 2017
I'm a blonde, blue eyed woman, Age 40

Offline PeterSteele

  • "I was fine, until I was born. And it's been downhill ever since."
  • ****
  • Posts: 171
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  • Gender: Questioning
Re: I am back
« Reply #2 on: September 17, 2020, 12:35:27 pm »
Thank you so much I greatly appreciate it
Peter Steele Θ

Offline Northern Star Girl

  • Previously Alaskan Danielle
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  • northernstargirl@susans.org
Re: I am back
« Reply #3 on: September 17, 2020, 01:06:59 pm »
So, I've been in CPS since March 21st 2019 and been trapped in lock down treatment facilities for depression and sexual abuse since June 12th 2019 to August 31st 2020. Life has been crazy and depression has been horrible. I got beat up by the girls a lot, got sexually abused at a mental hospital, cut myself a lot, and tried killing myself twice. I still wish I was a boy even though now I say that I don't. I still am insecure and hate myself. I have way too much self hatred its kinda scary. I am now 17 years old and in a foster home. I don't know what to say honestly. I am just very lonely and I feel the treatment was worthless.

@PeterSteele
Dear Peter
     Again, a warm Welcome Back to Susan's Place and the Forums.   I am so glad to read that you are OK and are now posting again here on the Forums...   

     Please know that I am not trying to sidetrack your comments and I will give you and others back this thread right after my comment replies to you.
   
    AS you are aware, as you get more involved in exchanging comments on various posts other members will be offering their thoughts and comments in response to any of your questions and concerns..

    This is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say regarding their own experiences.
    There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation as you continue to feel free to share it.
 
     ***It's a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new friends here. 

    Please come in and continue to be re-involved at your own pace.
   
    Here is the updated and latest information and important LINKS that I have included below.   You will find information about the site that will help you navigate around and best utilize the features here.   
Please look closely at the LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that many new and old members ask.

Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle


Here are some links to the site rules and stuff that all new members should be familiar with:
 
Things that you should read
***SEE MY LINKS BELOW
The Ramblings of a Northern*Star Girl
A New Chapter: ALASKAN DANIELLE's Chronicles
I am the HUNTED PREY: Danielle’s Chronicles
Things change re: ALASKAN DANIELLE
Positive Mindset... put away negativity

Started HRT:   March 2015
Went Full-Time    December 2016
Quit my male-mode job and relocated to a very small town in Alaska in January 2017
I'm a blonde, blue eyed woman, Age 40

Offline Northern Star Girl

  • Previously Alaskan Danielle
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  • northernstargirl@susans.org
Re: I am back
« Reply #4 on: September 17, 2020, 01:07:16 pm »
@PeterSteele
Dear Peter
One more thing......

At 17 years old you are one of our younger members and you are most welcome here.

Please be aware that you are free to share and read on the various sub-forums here but we also have special place that you can also share and read with our other younger members.

          Youth Talk
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,496.0.html

       Youth Introductions
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,544.0.html

     You might want to go to those sub-forums and get acquainted with other members there.
If you have any questions please feel free to message me.

      If you wish you can go to the "regular"  Introductions Forum to briefly tell more members about yourself!

      Also please be certain to look over the informative and important LINKS that I gave to you in my Welcome Message.....   lots of good guidance about how to navigate around the Forums and to be aware of the RULES here.

HUGS and best wishes as you get more involved here on the Forums.
Danielle  (Northern Star Girl)
***SEE MY LINKS BELOW
The Ramblings of a Northern*Star Girl
A New Chapter: ALASKAN DANIELLE's Chronicles
I am the HUNTED PREY: Danielle’s Chronicles
Things change re: ALASKAN DANIELLE
Positive Mindset... put away negativity

Started HRT:   March 2015
Went Full-Time    December 2016
Quit my male-mode job and relocated to a very small town in Alaska in January 2017
I'm a blonde, blue eyed woman, Age 40