Author Topic: What do you do when Sad?  (Read 317 times)

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Offline Alice

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What do you do when Sad?
« on: September 18, 2020, 01:56:36 am »
I am very sad today and instead of doing my job searching and preparing for I have been reading my story. I know this is not good as my story is as sad as they coming. Reading back when I was at my worst and thinking I do not want to go back there, sad I had to go through all that and glad that I somehow made it.

Life if becoming a struggle again, I hate be sad and depressed but at least I know how to cope with it.

Alice

Offline Pammie

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #1 on: September 18, 2020, 04:42:00 am »
I am very sad today and instead of doing my job searching and preparing for I have been reading my story. I know this is not good as my story is as sad as they coming. Reading back when I was at my worst and thinking I do not want to go back there, sad I had to go through all that and glad that I somehow made it.

Life if becoming a struggle again, I hate be sad and depressed but at least I know how to cope with it.

Alice
It’s often said life is a rollercoaster and I think being trans magnifies that a lot! There are so many hurdles and it sometimes feels like life will never get to be smooth but we get through everything in the end.


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Online Gertrude

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #2 on: September 18, 2020, 08:29:43 am »
Sometime I am just sad...And the other two responses have been to eat or the newer option has been CBT, which is to say, I recognize it when it happens and use rationalization to deconstruct and choose a different response and different thoughts and therefore feelings. It gets tough at times choosing the latter approach.

Offline SonadoraXVX

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #3 on: September 18, 2020, 12:33:25 pm »
I ruminate for awhile and write down the pros and cons, emotions do not follow logic, they have a mind of their own, even when it makes sense to do what makes you sad, for example, cutting off some long time friends(decades long friends) because, they were toxic and hypermacho, and prejudicial, and do not fit in my worldview anymore to tolerate them.

I ruminate, even cry, especially when hearing music(its a gateway to my artistic side), even while doing other things that the logical side says I more need focusing.

To know thyself is to be blessed, but to know others is to prevent supreme headaches
Sun Tzu said it best, "To know thyself is half the battle won, but to know yourself and the enemy, is to win 100% of the battles".




Online Northern Star Girl

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #4 on: September 18, 2020, 01:19:38 pm »
I know that this may sound trite but if you think about it, it rings true, at least it does for me.

No one can "make" you happy, no one can "make" you sad, and no one can "make" you doubt yourself.
It is all up to you how you feel about yourself.... and your self-assurance and self-confidence.   
Obviously bad things can happen to any of us, that is called "life" ...
It is then our opportunity to ponder and find ways to deal with it... planning positive thought and actions to make things better.

My favorite quote and personal positive mind-set regarding this comes from Winston Churchill as he penned the following quote during England's dark days during World War 2.
       "A Pessimist see Difficulty in every Opportunity,
           an Optimist sees Opportunity in every Difficulty"
.
That is the very first post on my following thread.   Since I posted that thread back over 2 years ago in June of 2018, and as of now there are a total of over 400 very helpful reply comments on that thread from many of our members.
   Positive Mindset... put away negativity

Please take some time to read some of the post replies there starting at the beginning.

Wishing all of you well, and try to have a positive mindset.... negativity will only burden your thoughts and your actions.

HUGS and best wishes,
Danielle


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Offline barbie

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #5 on: September 18, 2020, 01:23:17 pm »
I seldom feel sad as I have 3 children and my job is very secure. But I sometimes do feel hollowness, becoming nihilistic. I drink wine to sleep. I occasionally feel sad because I can not become a GG.

barbie~~

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Offline Sarah-Red

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #6 on: September 18, 2020, 02:38:32 pm »
Be there for yourself. Hear yourself out for how you feel, and also look further to what you find makes sense to answer those feelings and your heart.

Offline CaelaNotKayla

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #7 on: September 18, 2020, 03:07:19 pm »
Alice-

Since the passing of my wife I have had  times where I sit back in loneliness and just want to cry, and thinking of better times only makes it worse.   I have to take myself out of the situation and do something for myself. Sometimes I'll put on my "happy" playlist and take a nice warm bath with the candles lit and "relaxing" bath salts.   Sometimes it's jumping in the car and driving with no destination.  Both are things that I can have time to think and come to terms with my feelings.  For me I realize my feelings are often on a pendulum- and sooner or later it will start swinging the other way- and then I'll see that things aren't so bad- that I'm not alone- that I've made it through a mountain range of challenges in this life and I'm still standing.

Caela
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Offline Alice

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #8 on: September 19, 2020, 02:55:30 am »
Wow,

Today has been a very emotional day. I was in a competition for fly my model planes and after the first flight I was sad and needed a cry. After a long cry and emotion drained and I could start to think again. I had time to think about the first flight and corrected the bog thing that bother me. It was easy to correct, my first flight was way to high and I told my caller that we needed to fly lower where I was more comfortable. After that my flights (a lotal of 4) improved. I was still shaky on the second flight but after that I was Okay.

I talked to my counselor yesterday and we both agreed that reading my story was not helpful. There were some other significant factors which contributed to my mood. It is rather ironic that my friend today said you can only control what you can control. Gee that set me off. I started to list all of the thing I could not control in my life ie Depression, anxiety and being Trans. All of them I wanted to control but as we all  know none of these things we can truly control. All we can go is roll with those punches and work out how to react once we gain knowledge of our predicament.   None of this of course helped me this morning, all I wanted to do is cry and get rid of my emotions.

Thank you everyone for your replies.  Danielle, I shall try and read your positive mindset thread.

Alice

Offline Sophiaprincess2019

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Re: What do you do when Sad?
« Reply #9 on: September 19, 2020, 08:32:28 pm »
Alice,

Hopefully you have found a constructive outlet for your sadness. When I'm sad I sometimes isolate myself from the rest of the world and let it all come out in big satisfying tears. The more I let go the better I feel. I let myself know it's temporary and everything's going to be okay. Along my journey I've learned not to hold anything back, something I did in my previous life. Today I require a venting system for my sadness and stress. Hopefully you've found yours.

Cheers and huge hugs.

Sophia
1968 Assigned male at birth with feminine mannerisms
1978 Dolls and dresses
1988 Experimental stage, limited makeup and clothes
1998 Denial continues, unsuccessfully tried living as a man
12-8-2018 Knew I was a woman, time for a change....
2-22-2019 Started HRT
8-9-2019 Legal Name Change
8-14-2019 New Drivers License issued with correct gender
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2-22-2020 One year HRT

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