Author Topic: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?  (Read 801 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline diy life

  • Visitor
  • *
  • Posts: 5
  • Reputation: +1/-0
how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« on: October 24, 2020, 03:00:31 am »
(please note: therapy isn't actually an option for me, given the part of the world I reside in. there's a great deal of complicated, institutionalized discrimination against LGBTQ that makes it risky for me to seek any kind of in-person therapy)

I'm having a hard time understanding whether I am transgender or not, as I feel like it's a thought/dream that only stays with me for as long as I'm aroused.
Once my arousal has reached a point where I have to "take care of it" to get it "released", my mind snaps back to the reality and plans that I have set out for my cisgender self.

As I've grown older, I've somehow started trying to prolong this "aroused" state for as long as I can - to the point where I can't even exactly call it a "sexual" arousal anymore (sometimes its just me watching a YouTube video of a transgender person discussing their transition journey, or talking about hormones, etc.).

Previously, I used to get into this state from just watching porn (any kind, but I always gravitated towards transgender/"sissy" porn), or randomly from seeing something even mildly sexually "provocative" on social media (heck, sometimes, it was just memes!).

In fact, as I'm typing this, I feel like "aroused" isn't even the appropriate term for this state of mind - but I can't quite come up with a better term for it.
It's this feeling of being liberated, of having a different life than what I have, a new identity for myself, etc.

BUT, this goes away when I've "released" myself.
EDIT: once I'm "back to reality", I have a fleeting thought about the sheer impossibility of the transition process itself (huge social and family barriers, to the point where I have to migrate elsewhere to successfully transition; financial issues; etc.), and go back to my "cis" mindset.

So...what exactly is wrong with me, then? And what am I supposed to do about it?

(there's a lot more I wanted to say, but I'm not sure how to begin, or if I can even put it all into words without making it sound like a jumbled mess of thoughts)

Offline Rakel

  • Formerly known as Dani
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 3,532
  • Reputation: +48/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • Rakel@susans.org
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #1 on: October 24, 2020, 06:09:56 am »
Good morning diy life,

I see that this is your first post here on Susan's Place. Let me take a few moments to officially welcome you to our corner of the internet. We are a "family friendly" website for everyone with gender issues of any kind. This site is moderated to keep the content "family friendly" because we have many members here who are under age.

As you look around this site, you will read about other peoples struggles with gender identity and related issues. Keep in mind, we cannot diagnosis your specific issues. We can only tell you what has worked for ourselves.

We have Terms of Service that all of us must adhere to in order to keep this site "family friendly". I will post the links below in addition to links to other important information.

Things that you should read


_________________________________________________________________________


Now, back to more specific reply to  your post.

From your post, you mentioned that your dysphoria is related to your sexual feelings. It is very important to know that gender identity and sexual preference are two different things.

Gender identity dysphoria is something that is with us all the time. People with gender dysphoria has an inner sense of self that something is  not correct. We just do not feel like we can continue on as we are.  In fact, about 40% of us feel that no life is preferable to living as we are. Sadly, a significant number of  us cannot find any help and end their lives early.

While my comments are typical of many of us who have sought gender transition, not everybody who has some sort of gender issue feels this way. You may or may not be someone who has transgender issues. The only safe way to find out is through professional  counselling.

You mentioned that in your country, counselling is not available due to social or political pressure. I can only think of one answer to that is maybe a visit to another country, specifically so that you can get professional counselling for a few times anyway. This may help you to decide if transition is in your future.






_______________________________________________________________

Retired Pharmacist with over 40 years experience in Hospital and Retail Pharmacies.
I still keep my professional licence active and in good standing.


Offline Nadine Spirit

  • Little Mrs. Snarky
  • Friend
  • ****
  • Posts: 101
  • Reputation: +4/-0
  • Gender: Female
    • Unordinary Style
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #2 on: October 24, 2020, 07:50:05 am »
How can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?

That is very hard for anyone else to know, and sometimes it is also very hard for ourselves to know.  When I was in that phase of my life I didn't know I would ever transition and if anyone had tried to tell me that I would one day, I'd tell them they obviously didn't know me at all.

It's funny what we can see once we've already done it.  Back in my 20s I was sure all I had was a sexual fetish.  How did I come to the place where I am at now?  I spent too many years in self doubt, denial, guilt, and fear.  Eventually, slowly, the massive amounts of sexual attraction I felt towards women began to subside.  Even though I have had a wide variety of sexual escapades, nothing ever seemed to fully satiate me.  I began to understand that even though I was extremely attracted to women, there was also something else going on.  I was wanting to have what I was attracted to.  Which is different than wanting something sexually.  It is an internal feeling that during the height of my sexual fetish thinking phase was so dim I could more easily ignore it.

Sadly I knew who I was when I was super young, prior to puberty.  But puberty injected me with testosterone and an incredible sex drive that slowly eclipsed everything else.  And slowly the part of me who knew who I am faded, ten years later, in my 20s I had no recollection of what I knew when I was a child. 

A larger part of what began to unlock everything was when I got so good at crossdressing that I was able to create very convincing looking cleavage.  When I saw that on myself it began to dawn on me, wait yes I am attracted to breasts on other women, but as well I finally began to see my body as it should be.  That was when I began to be able to tell the difference between sexual attraction and dysphoria. 

So, in the end, I will say again, it is hard to tell, and really only we ourselves are able to know the difference.  Good luck!

Offline diy life

  • Visitor
  • *
  • Posts: 5
  • Reputation: +1/-0
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #3 on: October 24, 2020, 08:32:31 am »
How can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?

That is very hard for anyone else to know, and sometimes it is also very hard for ourselves to know.  When I was in that phase of my life I didn't know I would ever transition and if anyone had tried to tell me that I would one day, I'd tell them they obviously didn't know me at all.

It's funny what we can see once we've already done it.  Back in my 20s I was sure all I had was a sexual fetish.  How did I come to the place where I am at now?  I spent too many years in self doubt, denial, guilt, and fear.  Eventually, slowly, the massive amounts of sexual attraction I felt towards women began to subside.  Even though I have had a wide variety of sexual escapades, nothing ever seemed to fully satiate me.  I began to understand that even though I was extremely attracted to women, there was also something else going on.  I was wanting to have what I was attracted to.  Which is different than wanting something sexually.  It is an internal feeling that during the height of my sexual fetish thinking phase was so dim I could more easily ignore it.

Sadly I knew who I was when I was super young, prior to puberty.  But puberty injected me with testosterone and an incredible sex drive that slowly eclipsed everything else.  And slowly the part of me who knew who I am faded, ten years later, in my 20s I had no recollection of what I knew when I was a child. 

A larger part of what began to unlock everything was when I got so good at crossdressing that I was able to create very convincing looking cleavage.  When I saw that on myself it began to dawn on me, wait yes I am attracted to breasts on other women, but as well I finally began to see my body as it should be.  That was when I began to be able to tell the difference between sexual attraction and dysphoria. 

So, in the end, I will say again, it is hard to tell, and really only we ourselves are able to know the difference.  Good luck!

Good lord, what you wrote felt so relatable its actually spooky!

You put into words exactly what I am going through right now, better than I could!

There are phases where I seriously consider measuring myself and getting some clothes to experiment crossdressing - but I stop short of actually acting on it, because I'm scared that crossdressing would be rabbit hole that I may never be able to climb out of.

Online Northern Star Girl

  • Previously Alaskan Danielle
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 32,176
  • Reputation: +47/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • northernstargirl@susans.org
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #4 on: October 24, 2020, 10:11:03 am »
@diy life
     I am so very glad that you have decided become a member here and that you have started posting in the Forums.
     
    As you continue to post on the forums you will be able to exchange thoughts and comments with others that are experiencing many of the same things that you are.   I expect that you will be getting many members offering their thoughts and suggestions as you continue to post here. 
   
     For sure this is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say that may have been in your circumstances and with your questions and concerns.
    There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation and as you continue to feel free to share with all of us.
 
     I see that our lovely member  @Rakel  has already given you a big WELCOME ... but please allow me to also warmly WELCOME you to Susan's Place
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.

    As you are certainly aware you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members.  When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others and offer support to others. ....
     ***There is a very good chance that you might find that you will make some new like-minded friends here. 

    Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace.
   
    Attached at the end of  Rakel's  Welcome Message are important and informative LINKS that will help you to navigate around the Forums and will allow you to enjoy the features here.     
Please look closely at the LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.

Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle
***SEE MY LINKS BELOW
The Ramblings of a Northern*Star Girl
A New Chapter: ALASKAN DANIELLE's Chronicles
I am the HUNTED PREY: Danielle’s Chronicles
Things change re: ALASKAN DANIELLE
Positive Mindset... put away negativity

Started HRT:   March 2015
Went Full-Time    December 2016
Quit my male-mode job and relocated to a very small town in Alaska in January 2017
I'm a blonde, blue eyed woman, Age 40

Online Northern Star Girl

  • Previously Alaskan Danielle
  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 32,176
  • Reputation: +47/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • northernstargirl@susans.org
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #5 on: October 24, 2020, 10:12:06 am »
@diy life

ONE MORE THING and you can have your thread back....  
If you feel so inclined please feel free to stop by the Introductions Forum to tell more members about yourself!
 
With more exposure to more members here you will be able to get more responses to your questions and concerns.

Wishing your well as you continue to be involved in the forums.

NOTE: Now, after all of this Greeting and Welcoming stuff, I will give you and your readers your thread back so you can get some answers from other members.

Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
Danielle
***SEE MY LINKS BELOW
The Ramblings of a Northern*Star Girl
A New Chapter: ALASKAN DANIELLE's Chronicles
I am the HUNTED PREY: Danielle’s Chronicles
Things change re: ALASKAN DANIELLE
Positive Mindset... put away negativity

Started HRT:   March 2015
Went Full-Time    December 2016
Quit my male-mode job and relocated to a very small town in Alaska in January 2017
I'm a blonde, blue eyed woman, Age 40

Offline Sephirah

  • *
  • Posts: 5,441
  • Reputation: +321/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #6 on: October 24, 2020, 02:05:22 pm »
(please note: therapy isn't actually an option for me, given the part of the world I reside in. there's a great deal of complicated, institutionalized discrimination against LGBTQ that makes it risky for me to seek any kind of in-person therapy)

I'm having a hard time understanding whether I am transgender or not, as I feel like it's a thought/dream that only stays with me for as long as I'm aroused.
Once my arousal has reached a point where I have to "take care of it" to get it "released", my mind snaps back to the reality and plans that I have set out for my cisgender self.

As I've grown older, I've somehow started trying to prolong this "aroused" state for as long as I can - to the point where I can't even exactly call it a "sexual" arousal anymore (sometimes its just me watching a YouTube video of a transgender person discussing their transition journey, or talking about hormones, etc.).

Previously, I used to get into this state from just watching porn (any kind, but I always gravitated towards transgender/"sissy" porn), or randomly from seeing something even mildly sexually "provocative" on social media (heck, sometimes, it was just memes!).

In fact, as I'm typing this, I feel like "aroused" isn't even the appropriate term for this state of mind - but I can't quite come up with a better term for it.
It's this feeling of being liberated, of having a different life than what I have, a new identity for myself, etc.

BUT, this goes away when I've "released" myself.
EDIT: once I'm "back to reality", I have a fleeting thought about the sheer impossibility of the transition process itself (huge social and family barriers, to the point where I have to migrate elsewhere to successfully transition; financial issues; etc.), and go back to my "cis" mindset.

So...what exactly is wrong with me, then? And what am I supposed to do about it?

(there's a lot more I wanted to say, but I'm not sure how to begin, or if I can even put it all into words without making it sound like a jumbled mess of thoughts)

There is nothing "Wrong" with you, sweetie. So get that out of your head right at the start, okay?

You likely know the obvious answer to your questions but that is a difficult thing for you. So I'm going to try something different, if that's okay. I'm not a therapist but I'd like to ask you some questions, if that's okay? Because I believe that people always have more insight coming to their own conclusions than being told something. :)

Question one: what is it about this which you feel makes you aroused? Specifically. It's hard for me to not say what I think, because I think a lot, lol. But I don't want to, I want to hear how you feel. :)

Question two: Why do you think this period has grown over time?

Question three: What is it about this state you are in which makes you feel like you want to keep it going?

Question four: Do you see yourself in these situations? If so, how?

Sorry for the questions but... it's been my experience that people know themselves way better than anyone here knows them. And people often reach their own answers just by thinking about things. :)

I will say again... there is nothing wrong with you, okay? Nothing. *hugs*

Offline diy life

  • Visitor
  • *
  • Posts: 5
  • Reputation: +1/-0
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #7 on: October 25, 2020, 05:03:37 am »
Question one: what is it about this which you feel makes you aroused? Specifically. It's hard for me to not say what I think, because I think a lot, lol. But I don't want to, I want to hear how you feel. :)

I'm not sure, or maybe I just can't put into a coherent sentence, but something about being a submissive feminine entity in a sexual situation feels empowering and liberating in a way.
Even when those "sissy hypno" videos talk about being submissive and stuff, I tend to interpret those as actually promoting individualism in a weird way.
Its like, when you’re this feminine and submissive being, you possess something that others crave, and you have full control over how much of it they are allowed to enjoy.

Again, I don’t think I can explain it any better, and I'm sorry if that sounded contradictory and nonsensical.
   
Question two: Why do you think this period has grown over time?

Again, I'm not sure, but maybe it had something to do with me starting to watch YouTube videos of trans people who aren’t necessarily talking about anything sexual, and just discussing their usual life and struggles 

Question three: What is it about this state you are in which makes you feel like you want to keep it going?

Part of it is probably the sense of sexual freedom I imagine I would get out of it, part of it is probably a chance to start a new life with a new identity, and a large part of it probably a big dose of "I don’t really know why". :(

Question four: Do you see yourself in these situations? If so, how?

not quite sure I understood this question, could you clarify a bit?

Offline MeTony

  • *
  • Posts: 1,451
  • Reputation: +17/-0
  • Gender: Male
Everyone is different. I never had or have sexual feelings or arousal connected to my gender dysphoria. Just wanted to say that, not everyone is the same. We all walk our own unique path in life.

Btw. Welcome. I lost Your introduction somewhere on Tapatalk. So I welcome you here.


Skickat från min iPhone med Tapatalk

Online Pammie

  • *
  • Posts: 2,183
  • Reputation: +15/-0
Everyone is different. I never had or have sexual feelings or arousal connected to my gender dysphoria. Just wanted to say that, not everyone is the same. We all walk our own unique path in life.

Btw. Welcome. I lost Your introduction somewhere on Tapatalk. So I welcome you here.


Skickat från min iPhone med Tapatalk
I’m not sure I’ve come across any trans people before who connected gender dysphoria to sexual arousal. Definitely one for the therapist!
It’s never easy when trying to understand your feelings - I guess the thing is as people often say gender is certainly not binary and there’s a huge spectrum


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Offline Alice

  • *
  • Posts: 104
  • Reputation: +15/-0
  • Gender: Female
    • The Battle Within
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #10 on: October 26, 2020, 07:08:23 pm »
Good lord, what you wrote felt so relatable its actually spooky!

You put into words exactly what I am going through right now, better than I could!

There are phases where I seriously consider measuring myself and getting some clothes to experiment crossdressing - but I stop short of actually acting on it, because I'm scared that crossdressing would be rabbit hole that I may never be able to climb out of.

Diy Life,

You are not alone in these feelings. Long ago I felt exactly the same ways and I know these feelings are difficult to overcome.

Alice

 

Offline ramilove

  • *
  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 107
  • Reputation: +1/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #11 on: October 27, 2020, 05:42:57 pm »
DIY Life
You are not alone in your feelings. Where we fit in on the gender spectrum varies. I have always felt both a girl and a boy. Wore my mothers makeup, clothing, perfume, ear rings long before puberty.  Since puberty I experience sexually arousal just thinking of myself as a woman. I have both the masculine and feminine attributes and feelings. I like being different and think of myself as a special human being.
Love Rami
Electrolysis 3/4/2020
Estradiol 3/10/2020

Offline RobynD

  • Family
  • *****
  • Posts: 1,974
  • Reputation: +15/-0
  • Gender: Female
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #12 on: October 28, 2020, 05:23:39 pm »
I don't believe these feelings of arousal and your gender identity are at odds. Nearly everyone experiences "imposter syndrome" of some sort or another, at some time. Doubts go with the territory. Still, as it has been said here, only you can answer your identity and transition questions.

Was I ever aroused by the whole scene you describe? Probably on some level. I long ago lost interest in porn per se, but erotic stories and the like can still work for me. And unlike some others, I do not see erotic crossdressing, sissy subjects, and all of that as inherently dangerous to our community as long as it is the right perspective. Someone is always going to interpret something wrong and use it to confirm some bias of theirs. That is no reason to shame or disparage entire communities/subcultures of people.

Also, euphoria, empowerment over new freedom and realization of your true self can be mistaken or even include arousal of sorts. This stuff is pretty freeing and a free person is certainly more explorative in general on these things.

Some cis women become aroused over aspects of their gender identity and presentation and the situations therein, so it stands to reason some trans women would be too.





Online Pammie

  • *
  • Posts: 2,183
  • Reputation: +15/-0
I don't believe these feelings of arousal and your gender identity are at odds. Nearly everyone experiences "imposter syndrome" of some sort or another, at some time. Doubts go with the territory. Still, as it has been said here, only you can answer your identity and transitions questions.

Was I ever aroused by the whole scene you describe? Probably on some level. I long ago lost interest in porn per se, but erotic stories and the like can still work for me. And unlike some others, I do not see erotic crossdressing, sissy subjects, and all of that as inherently dangerous to our community as long as it is the right perspective. Someone is always going to interpret something wrong and use it to confirm some bias of theirs. That is no reason to shame or disparage entire communities/subcultures of people.

Also, euphoria, empowerment over new freedom and realization of your true self can be mistaken or even include arousal of sorts. This stuff is pretty freeing and a free person is certainly more explorative in general on these things.

Some cis women become aroused over aspects of their gender identity and presentation and the situations therein, so it stands to reason some trans women would be too.
Well, I have to admit i’m not massively a fan of confusing gender identity with sexual identity. As a community we have had to work really hard to clarify that gender identity is very distinct.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Offline RobynD

  • Family
  • *****
  • Posts: 1,974
  • Reputation: +15/-0
  • Gender: Female
Well, I have to admit i’m not massively a fan of confusing gender identity with sexual identity. As a community we have had to work really hard to clarify that gender identity is very distinct.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Oh, I definitely agree. It's just that I've seen so many people ask a similar question to the OP. I think I feel the need to communicate that the two need not be in conflict, when seemingly one's interests seem on the surface at least, to be in conflict.

I often feel like some in our community, try to hold us to a level of "purity" for lack of a better term, (or maybe homogeny?) that simply can't exist in such a diverse group of people. I can see the motivation of why this occurs as parts of the outside world that shall go unnamed, try to demonize us. The truth is we are diverse, sometimes we're kinky, sometimes we're not, sometimes asexual and every other option out there, and some people feel genuine shame for whatever they are and that is truly sad.

The other thing I recall from my early days of these discussions and outside views, where people would tell me to the effect " Cis women do not get turned on by their femininity". When that is totally false from the standpoint of the many cis women, I've spoken to on the subject.

But yeah distinctly it should be repeated that gender identity and sexual preference/identity are very different things.

« Last Edit: October 29, 2020, 04:53:07 am by Rakel »



Online Pammie

  • *
  • Posts: 2,183
  • Reputation: +15/-0
Oh, I definitely agree. It's just that I've seen so many people ask a similar question to the OP. I think I feel the need to communicate that the two need not be in conflict, when seemingly one's interests seem on the surface at least, to be in conflict.

I often feel like some in our community, try to hold us to a level of "purity" for lack of a better term, (or maybe homogeny?) that simply can't exist in such a diverse group of people. I can see the motivation of why this occurs as parts of the outside world that shall go unnamed, try to demonize us. The truth is we are diverse, sometimes we're kinky, sometimes we're not, sometimes asexual and every other option out there, and some people feel genuine shame for whatever they are and that is truly sad.

The other thing I recall from my early days of these discussions and outside views, where people would tell me to the effect " Cis women do not get turned on by their femininity". When that is totally false from the standpoint of the many cis women, I've spoken to on the subject.

But yeah distinctly it should be repeated that gender identity and sexual preference/identity are very different things.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Offline no-moose

  • Newbie
  • **
  • Posts: 20
  • Reputation: +1/-0
  • Gender: Female
I’ll add some observations From my experience with this, but first I just want to say thank you for all of your input and observations. This has been a super helpful thread for me to read!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Offline Birdie on a Wire

  • Newbie
  • **
  • Posts: 24
  • Reputation: +1/-0
There are phases where I seriously consider measuring myself and getting some clothes to experiment crossdressing - but I stop short of actually acting on it, because I'm scared that crossdressing would be rabbit hole that I may never be able to climb out of.
I’ve heard it said that there are plenty of cis women who can become aroused with their femininity but I’ve never seen any verifiable data or study on the topic. It doesn’t seem far fetched but I’ve never heard of cis men getting aroused at the thought or perception of their masculinity.

Be that as it may... your arousal is conceivable that it could be associated with gender identity issues but honestly it seems more compatible with the idea that you may have a sexual addiction. I am NOT psychotherapist so take that for what it’s a worth... an idea thrown out there from a random stranger on the internet.

I quoted your statement about crossdressing to say you should definitely try it, if for nothing else, to be able to say you have exhausted all possibilities. Being transgender can be a very difficult row to hoe. It is not an easy life.

However if you put in the time effort to appear as much like a woman as you can and after your... ahem, *release* subsides see how you feel still dressed up. Try going out still dressed. Even something small like driving to get gas in your car or quickly walking to the mailbox in the evening.

I wish you the best.

Online Pammie

  • *
  • Posts: 2,183
  • Reputation: +15/-0
I’ve heard it said that there are plenty of cis women who can become aroused with their femininity but I’ve never seen any verifiable data or study on the topic. It doesn’t seem far fetched but I’ve never heard of cis men getting aroused at the thought or perception of their masculinity.

Be that as it may... your arousal is conceivable that it could be associated with gender identity issues but honestly it seems more compatible with the idea that you may have a sexual addiction. I am NOT psychotherapist so take that for what it’s a worth... an idea thrown out there from a random stranger on the internet.

I quoted your statement about crossdressing to say you should definitely try it, if for nothing else, to be able to say you have exhausted all possibilities. Being transgender can be a very difficult row to hoe. It is not an easy life.

However if you put in the time effort to appear as much like a woman as you can and after your... ahem, *release* subsides see how you feel still dressed up. Try going out still dressed. Even something small like driving to get gas in your car or quickly walking to the mailbox in the evening.

I wish you the best.
I too have never seen any data suggesting cis women are turned on by their sexuality and it seems unlikely to me but I also am no psychotherapist!
Some good advice from birdie!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Offline barbie

  • *
  • *
  • Posts: 5,637
  • Reputation: +68/-0
  • Gender: Female
  • I change my avatar every week
Re: how can I tell if my feelings aren't just a "fetish"/"kink"?
« Reply #19 on: November 08, 2020, 01:25:42 pm »
Just do it.

Tags: