Author Topic: How would you describe your gender?  (Read 1954 times)

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Offline creamsodaplease

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How would you describe your gender?
« on: November 12, 2020, 01:28:27 am »
I identify myself as both trans and non-binary. I would say my gender is like a boy to the left, or in between man and woman but in a confusing way, if that makes sense. How would you describe your gender? I also want to hear from binary trans folks!

Offline Rakel

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #1 on: November 12, 2020, 06:16:40 am »
Understanding what you are feeling makes perfect sense to me, but keep in mind that I  have been struggling with my own issues for over 50 years.

Since you have mentioned that you are quite young (compared to me at least  ;)) Keep in mind that as we grow older sometimes our issues change. If they change frequently, we call this gender fluid. Not everyone is gender fluid. I am not. I knew I had issues matching my physical body with my mental self  image. My issues are permanent, even though I have tried to work out these issues for decades. This is just me, but I can appreciate someone who  has gender issues that keep changing.

However you see yourself, you must ask yourself a few questions, "Is this how I want to live the rest of my life? Am I Okay with my feelings as I am now? Do I need to make any changes?" These are questions only you can answer. Sometimes professional counselling is necessary. Other times, we are just fine living as we are, even if our feelings are somewhat fluid.


Take care and see you around  :-*






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Offline Gertrude

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #2 on: November 12, 2020, 07:11:54 am »
there's identity and then there is expression. For some of us those are very different things.

Offline sarahc

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #3 on: November 12, 2020, 08:46:38 am »
I am female.

I don't consider "transgender" a gender identity. Your gender identity could be male, female, non-binary, genderqueer, or whatever other label you want to describe yourself. I consider transgender as part of my identity, but not part of my gender identity.

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Offline Devlyn

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #4 on: November 12, 2020, 09:49:41 am »
I identify myself as both trans and non-binary. I would say my gender is like a boy to the left, or in between man and woman but in a confusing way, if that makes sense. How would you describe your gender? I also want to hear from binary trans folks!

I'm non-binary, genderfluid...

there's identity and then there is expression. For some of us those are very different things.

...with a female presentation (expression).  :)
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Offline Battle Goddess

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #5 on: November 12, 2020, 10:53:59 am »
I identify myself as both trans and non-binary. I would say my gender is like a boy to the left, or in between man and woman but in a confusing way, if that makes sense. How would you describe your gender? I also want to hear from binary trans folks!

That's such a fine question, CSP. Provocative, and it deserves a thoughtful response. In my own case I needed years of therapy to admit of the possibility of being non-cis at all, and then to determine what flavor of gender felt right, and then to settle down upon binary female. Stormy times.

That's not to say I present super-femme all the time. I'm confident and comfortable enough in my own skin that androgynous, baggy grey sweats don't make me unhappy, and I don't mind if I go a day without shaving (as long as I don't leave the house! :o)

I like your imaginative descriptions of your own gender because my conceptualization of "gender" is not as if it were a single-dimensional spectrum stretching from "Male" to "Female" but rather that it is a multi-multidimensional thing with all sorts of spectra stretching every which way. Won't even begin to speculate on what-all or how many dimensions there are because I believe everyone has their own set, and some peoples' sets overlap, and some don't.

Another way of conceptualizing it is that the components of gender are like stars in the sky. There are so, so many stars, and for some people some stars burn brightest, and for other folks an entirely different bunch of stars may shine brightly, even though we all see the same sky. We also each see our own constellations, and that's how the world works. Not just for trans people, but also for the people who think they're cis.

A final proof? Try to explain your definition of gender to somebody else not in your own words but in theirs, and get it just right. Give it a shot. I dast ya. Maybe you'll get pretty close, but more likely than not their constellations aren't yours, and they believe gender is measured on different dimensions than you do. That's what happens when I try, and it's okay by me. We're all humans. We all feel the world differently. Key for me was figuring out what I felt.

Anyway, that's what I think.
"It's not really a choice. Because we're not choosing to transition...we're choosing to be happy." -- SarahC

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Online Pammie

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #6 on: November 12, 2020, 01:15:00 pm »
I don’t know if im missing the point or fooling myself but I describe my gender as female . Simple.


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Offline Battle Goddess

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #7 on: November 12, 2020, 01:47:54 pm »
I don’t know if im missing the point or fooling myself but I describe my gender as female . Simple.


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Like she said.


"It's not really a choice. Because we're not choosing to transition...we're choosing to be happy." -- SarahC

Spironolactone January 10 2019
Divigel January 20 2019
Estradiol Valerate March 14 2019

Offline AllieSF

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #8 on: November 12, 2020, 01:56:25 pm »
Technicalities be damned!  I am transgender.  I am a transgender woman. I am a woman!!!
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Online Pammie

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #9 on: November 12, 2020, 02:02:49 pm »
Technicalities be damned!  I am transgender.  I am a transgender woman. I am a woman!!!
Hun, your gender is female, ur a woman xx


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Offline LaRae

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #10 on: November 12, 2020, 03:05:47 pm »
Female, with really heavy tomboy leanings.  ;D
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Offline AllieSF

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #11 on: November 12, 2020, 03:09:54 pm »
Pammie,

Please read what I wrote.  That is how I define myself.  You define yourself as you please.

Thanks you,

Allie
HRT - February 2017
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Offline Devlyn

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #12 on: November 12, 2020, 03:41:21 pm »
Let's remember to respect each other. One thing is sacred on this site, and that is how someone chooses to identify themselves. All identities are valid.
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Online Pammie

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #13 on: November 12, 2020, 03:48:34 pm »
Pammie,

Please read what I wrote.  That is how I define myself.  You define yourself as you please.

Thanks you,

Allie
Sorry. I was trying to be supportive - clearly I misunderstood


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Offline LaRae

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #14 on: November 12, 2020, 03:50:02 pm »
Yep. I also identify as a Transgender woman. I see it as no slight. I'm proud of what I am.

I think that's been a shift over time that takes adjustment for some people, as it was seen as having a negative connotation for a long time, but it's a different world now, & I, as well as many others, have no qualms about identifying as, or being identified as, Trans.
"Never forget what you are, the rest of the world will not. Wear it like armour and it can never be used to hurt you."



Offline sarahc

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #15 on: November 12, 2020, 05:16:53 pm »
Yep. I also identify as a Transgender woman. I see it as no slight. I'm proud of what I am.

I think that's been a shift over time that takes adjustment for some people, as it was seen as having a negative connotation for a long time, but it's a different world now, & I, as well as many others, have no qualms about identifying as, or being identified as, Trans.

^^^ this. It is an “also identify” for me as well.

Interestingly, at the beginning of transition, I really wanted to get to a point where I could hide being transgender. But now, I’m completely comfortable just saying it plainly and undramatically. The change of attitudes, at least where I live, has been unexpectedly good and I feel much more comfortable about identifying as trans than I thought I would be.

Sarah
----
48 years young.
Known that I am trans since...forever.
First therapy session / decided to transition / hair removal: October 2018
HRT: January 2019 (journal https://www.susans.org/forums/index.phpVF/topic,244009.0.html)
VFS: September 2019; three-month report here
Full-time: April 2020
FFS: August 2020
SRS: January 2021

Offline Julie H

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #16 on: November 12, 2020, 05:25:42 pm »
Confused and yet to be determined. I am neither totally male nor totally female, just somewhere in between.
Julie

Offline Lady Sarah

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #17 on: November 12, 2020, 10:25:26 pm »
Personally, I describe my gender as female, despite my redneck tomboy traits / stuff I do. In the rural south, that is actually more normal than many of y'all might think.
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Offline Margrit

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #18 on: November 13, 2020, 02:20:44 am »
I describe my gender as female.
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Offline Nadine Spirit

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Re: How would you describe your gender?
« Reply #19 on: November 13, 2020, 06:28:49 am »
I am female.  Only if I am doing a presentation, or at the doctors, will I describe myself as a transgender female. 

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