Topic: How would you describe your gender?

[pamelatransuk]

I describe my gender as female and my expression as female.

Hugs

Pamela xx

[JoJoWolfe]

Good question.

A feminine woman.
I am gradually starting to become comfortable with that, before it was an aspiration, a hope a ‘dare I think of myself like that?’ Then I would think of myself as transgender. 

I only came out to very close friends, Cath and Jade in June, they weren’t surprised at all, almost ‘well you took your time’    i then started HRT 1st September and came out to my oldest friend of 30 years about a month ago and cried buckets when he took a moment to process it then carried on as if nothing had changed.

I’m still in the closet with work but when not working I dress normally - I regard the ‘drab’ as a necessary inconvenience until I hopefully retire early in June next year.  When I look at myself in the mirror I see normal and the person going to work as starting to look like someone vaguely familiar.

I’m sorry I do talk a lot ... what I’m trying to get across is the gradual process of accepting, embracing and celebrating who I am. Six years ago I was shocked, four years ago I was in the depths of despair, six months ago acceptance without regrets, now it’s ‘what a life I have ahead of me’ 

Just as most people don’t think about their gender, it’s just who they are, that is what I am working to achieve. I don’t wear padding, forms or wigs. My makeup takes 15 minutes, moisturiser with a dab of foundation, eyebrows, lashes and lip tint. I don’t want to ‘look like’ I want ‘to be’, I am me, and it just so happens that me is a feminine woman. The HRT is to help achieve a more feminine physique, along with a sensible diet and exercise, an orchidectomy is definitely on the cards, very possibly a vulvoplasty.

I do acknowledge that my biological sex is male but that is biology only and only of importance to medical professionals, after  all, I can’t see the genitalia of people in the street or who I meet.

Sorry, rattled on again...

[ChrissyRyan]

Female.


Chrissy

[KathyLauren]

My gender identity is female.

My experience and anatomy are transgender female, which is of relevance only to biographers, doctors, and my wife.

[Pammie]

My gender identity is female.

My experience and anatomy are transgender female, which is of relevance only to biographers, doctors, and my wife.

I love the biographers bit


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[RandyL]

Still working on it. I don't feel like a woman, I guess trans feminine is as far as I get at this point. But just started HRT so we shall see.

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[Pammie]

Still working on it. I don't feel like a woman, I guess trans feminine is as far as I get at this point. But just started HRT so we shall see.

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I hope over time you get clarity as I guess you see yourself on the journey rather than having reached a destination. Hugs. X


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[Froodah]

I am non-binary.

[Barri]

Here in the US, the feds put the option "Non Binary" on the form 4473 a couple years ago.
In PA the state recently removed all obstacles and you can fill out a form when renewing your DL to change to "Female" or "Non Binary" with no questions...I still need to interact with People and I do buy guns so...I figured I could put it off as an Edmund Hillary-esque reason if asked, so when I renewed my license on my birthday, I changed the gender to Non Binary.  I would love to have changed it to Female but that's just not realistic to presume others would perceive me as I wish in that regard.

[Froodah]

I'm non-binary.

As a child they always chose female characters in video games.

They like female activities like make-up, getting nails done, things like that. Shallow but fun!

I'm 28 and I still don't know if I feel like a girl or a boy.

[Battle Goddess]

Here's an interesting quandary:

I'm going through the seemingly endless process of updating instances of my deadname in each and every database where I've left tracks during the last, um, 39 years.

I just updated my record in my MBA alumni database. They offered a gender field where one could define oneself as male, female, non-binary, or transgender.

It's been decades since I earned my degree. I can't possibly contact all my alumni friends and acquaintances to let them know about my new life, nor do we have an appropriate forum, but we're a tight community for networking and hiring. I do need people to connect who I am with who they knew me as so they don't necessarily wonder who the Battle Goddess is.

So which to choose for my entry in the gender field among these restrictive options? I identify as female, but there are advantages to choosing the "transgender" entry. It is a cue to my fellow alumni as to what's gone on in my life. Also, despite discrimination from hiring managers, there are actually benefits from recruiters - I've gone from being your standard cookie-cutter MBA dude to being a diversity hire. It opens doors in the corporate world.

What would you choose?

I normally choose "female," but in this particular instance I chose "transgender," not for the recruiting but to jog classmates' memories. If it helps with the recruiting, great, but that's not really the point.

I think an ulterior motive is to let my trans flag fly. My classmates aren't necessarily politically conservative, but they move in socially normative circles. That my school allows alumni to identify as trans suggests there are others like us, but it might only be University policy, or identifying trans might be common among younger cohorts. Sure wasn't among us. I want to signal that even among my classmates, folks eventually figured ourselves out.

Opinions?

[Pammie]

Here's an interesting quandary:

I'm going through the seemingly endless process of updating instances of my deadname in each and every database where I've left tracks during the last, um, 39 years.

I just updated my record in my MBA alumni database. They offered a gender field where one could define oneself as male, female, non-binary, or transgender.

It's been decades since I earned my degree. I can't possibly contact all my alumni friends and acquaintances to let them know about my new life, nor do we have an appropriate forum, but we're a tight community for networking and hiring. I do need people to connect who I am with who they knew me as so they don't necessarily wonder who the Battle Goddess is.

So which to choose for my entry in the gender field among these restrictive options? I identify as female, but there are advantages to choosing the "transgender" entry. It is a cue to my fellow alumni as to what's gone on in my life. Also, despite discrimination from hiring managers, there are actually benefits from recruiters - I've gone from being your standard cookie-cutter MBA dude to being a diversity hire. It opens doors in the corporate world.

What would you choose?

I normally choose "female," but in this particular instance I chose "transgender," not for the recruiting but to jog classmates' memories. If it helps with the recruiting, great, but that's not really the point.

I think an ulterior motive is to let my trans flag fly. My classmates aren't necessarily politically conservative, but they move in socially normative circles. That my school allows alumni to identify as trans suggests there are others like us, but it might only be University policy, or identifying trans might be common among younger cohorts. Sure wasn't among us. I want to signal that even among my classmates, folks eventually figured ourselves out.

Opinions?

I can see how you got to that choice, would people not notice that you had changed gender even were you to flag the gender you identify with? That said, it’s certainly true that the transgender choice will stand out much more.
Personally I think there is no wrong choice (well, for both you and I Male would be a wrong choice)


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[Devlyn]

Here's an interesting quandary:

I'm going through the seemingly endless process of updating instances of my deadname in each and every database where I've left tracks during the last, um, 39 years.

I just updated my record in my MBA alumni database. They offered a gender field where one could define oneself as male, female, non-binary, or transgender.

It's been decades since I earned my degree. I can't possibly contact all my alumni friends and acquaintances to let them know about my new life, nor do we have an appropriate forum, but we're a tight community for networking and hiring. I do need people to connect who I am with who they knew me as so they don't necessarily wonder who the Battle Goddess is.

So which to choose for my entry in the gender field among these restrictive options? I identify as female, but there are advantages to choosing the "transgender" entry. It is a cue to my fellow alumni as to what's gone on in my life. Also, despite discrimination from hiring managers, there are actually benefits from recruiters - I've gone from being your standard cookie-cutter MBA dude to being a diversity hire. It opens doors in the corporate world.

What would you choose?

I normally choose "female," but in this particular instance I chose "transgender," not for the recruiting but to jog classmates' memories. If it helps with the recruiting, great, but that's not really the point.

I think an ulterior motive is to let my trans flag fly. My classmates aren't necessarily politically conservative, but they move in socially normative circles. That my school allows alumni to identify as trans suggests there are others like us, but it might only be University policy, or identifying trans might be common among younger cohorts. Sure wasn't among us. I want to signal that even among my classmates, folks eventually figured ourselves out.

Opinions?

Having never felt any shame about being transgender, I leap at the opportunity to use the Transgender tick box, or when the choices are Male, Female, Other, I choose Other.

[SoCal_Holly]

Battle Goddess:

I can definitely relate though not as far along as you are.

Especially if I should change my photo on LinkedIn, then no marking necessary as word would get around fast, lol

Guess I’ll cross that bridge when it happens sometime in the future....

Hugs,

Holly

[Pammie]

Having never felt any shame about being transgender, I leap at the opportunity to use the Transgender tick box, or when the choices are Male, Female, Other, I choose Other.

For me it’s not about shame, I just don’t identify as trans. For me Trans is just a fact not an identity. But, absolutely, that’s just me. We are all different as we know so well. Xx


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[Devlyn]

Having never felt any shame about being transgender, I leap at the opportunity to use the Transgender tick box, or when the choices are Male, Female, Other, I choose Other.

For me it’s not about shame, I just don’t identify as trans. For me Trans is just a fact not an identity. But, absolutely, that’s just me. We are all different as we know so well. Xx


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For many, there is a huge degree of shame, often stoked by external influences.

For me, neither male nor female really fits, and I'm glad that society is coming around to accepting that some people are just different. 

[Pammie]

For me it’s not about shame, I just don’t identify as trans. For me Trans is just a fact not an identity. But, absolutely, that’s just me. We are all different as we know so well. Xx


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For many, there is a huge degree of shame, often stoked by external influences.

For me, neither male nor female really fits, and I'm glad that society is coming around to accepting that some people are just different. 

Im sorry you feel shame. I’ve never felt that which is surprising given im a little over-sensitive at times. I also totally agree that its great it’s no longer a binary choice xx


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[Rachel]

Hi,

I live in Pennsylvania, USA.

I am female and binary. My 10 year passport, drivers license and birth certificate say female and I identify as female and consider myself female. I am transgender and I am a female.  I use to think of myself as a trans woman but now I identify as female and transgender. As transition has ended and I live my life, I experience life as a female so I guess my view of myself changed.

My view of my body has changed too. I really love my body and I am thankful I transitioned. I do not have suicidal ideation now. I very very rarely think of suicide and when I do it is a passing thought when something reminds me of my past or a contrast of how I see myself.

I really like guys. I have had several females interested in me and I have no interest in a sexual relationship. Guys on the other hand are awesome, in my opinion. I use to feel shamed when I would think about being with a guy. I never in my life fantasized being with a female and only a males. I use to be fixated in wanting to be a female but not now. Now when I am with guys I feel very engaged ( LOL ). 

Rachel

[Devlyn]

For me it’s not about shame, I just don’t identify as trans. For me Trans is just a fact not an identity. But, absolutely, that’s just me. We are all different as we know so well. Xx


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For many, there is a huge degree of shame, often stoked by external influences.

For me, neither male nor female really fits, and I'm glad that society is coming around to accepting that some people are just different. 

Im sorry you feel shame. I’ve never felt that which is surprising given im a little over-sensitive at times. I also totally agree that its great it’s no longer a binary choice xx


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I said "for many". I had stated earlier that I feel no shame. I'm a wyld unicorn and I know it. 

[Pammie]

Im sorry you feel shame. I’ve never felt that which is surprising given im a little over-sensitive at times. I also totally agree that its great it’s no longer a binary choice xx


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I said "for many". I had stated earlier that I feel no shame. I'm a wyld unicorn and I know it. 

Ah sorry!


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