Community Conversation > Passing

Janet Mock on Passing

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Kay Kozee:
It seems like transitioning is on my mind often lately. The subject of "passing" often is part of that. Passing is very complex subject. Thoughts of not passing can evoke fears of stares, rejection and even personal attacks. Successful passing means we can be accepted and blend in with society. For me, passing would not stop my transition, but I have other issues that I need not work out before a complete transition. One day, I'll talk about those in my blog.

I found this youtube video by Janet Mock. It is short, but she talks about the subject of passing. I like what she says.


Ryuichi13:
WOW!  What a video! 

By living my life as a man,  I am being myself. Nothing more, nothing less. 

Simply being.

Thank you for posting this.

Ryuichi

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Pammie:

--- Quote from: Kay Kozee on February 27, 2021, 06:55:40 am ---It seems like transitioning is on my mind often lately. The subject of "passing" often is part of that. Passing is very complex subject. Thoughts of not passing can evoke fears of stares, rejection and even personal attacks. Successful passing means we can be accepted and blend in with society. For me, passing would not stop my transition, but I have other issues that I need not work out before a complete transition. One day, I'll talk about those in my blog.

I found this youtube video by Janet Mock. It is short, but she talks about the subject of passing. I like what she says.



--- End quote ---
Im not sure she said very much tbh. She speaks from a very privileged position of looking 100% like her gender. Not all of us have that privilege so we are happy when we are perceived to be who we are.
Im 100% clear that my identity is not trans, it’s female. Ergo, being perceived as female is important to me.


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Karen_A:
i firmly believe that those who from pretty early on could pass well, can't really relate what it is like for those of who can't, because the experiences are so very different...

Over time it also affects who we are... That is because parts  (though far from the whole)  of who we are and how we see and feel about ourselves, forms as a reaction to how other interact and see us. Human are social animals , so how could it be otherwise?

A MTF TS who is only seen as woman for 10-15 years  has a very different life/social experience from someone who has spent that time getting read ...

And the funny thing is that in general is that when people "know", those that physically pass very well tend to be "accepted" better... Many people tend to react to what they see more than what they know I think.

BTW I have no trouble with the word passing when used among "ourselves"... because we know (or should) what we mean by that... We don't mean putting on an act (though I remember hearing the "faking until you make it" philosophy of transition back when I had 3D contact with the community. It's short hand for not being seen as what we know we are... and as humans are social beings, that matters to most of us... and I think for some more than they want to admit.

BTW while I have not been part of teh 3D community for many years, I am someone who can not pass all the time, and never was good looking either... But when I did have 3D contact with teh community, I saw what a huge difference in experience passing vs not was.

-Karen

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