Author Topic: School reunion  (Read 725 times)

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Offline Chelsealouise

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School reunion
« on: May 09, 2021, 12:25:13 pm »
I got a letter through the post the other day inviting me to a school reunion. I don't whether to go or not because obviously I am now a woman and when I was at the school I was a boy

I need some advice firstly what to wear and secondly do I go or not

Offline Pammie

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2021, 12:30:47 pm »
I got a letter through the post the other day inviting me to a school reunion. I don't whether to go or not because obviously I am now a woman and when I was at the school I was a boy

I need some advice firstly what to wear and secondly do I go or not
Oh my! Funnily enough I was considering this very point earlier today (though I don’t have a school reunion scheduled) - so many factors but ultimately what would you get out of it?
How many ex school friends know the real you and do you live in the same place still?


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Offline Chelsealouise

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #2 on: May 09, 2021, 12:37:04 pm »
I don't live in the area where the school is anymore due to moving to Cornwall 5 years ago.to be honest I'm thinking of going just to surprise everyone

Offline Pammie

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #3 on: May 09, 2021, 12:38:58 pm »
I don't live in the area where the school is anymore due to moving to Cornwall 5 years ago.to be honest I'm thinking of going just to surprise everyone
I don’t blame you! Maybe not much to lose I guess. Are you in contact with anyone else who will be there? X


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Offline sarahc

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #4 on: May 09, 2021, 12:40:12 pm »
FWIW, I went to an all-boys high school and I will NOT be attending my reunions going forward. I mean, that would so weird.

...But I definitely will be going to my college reunions. And if I went to a co-ed school, yes, I'd probably go.

Honestly, it really depends on the school, the town you grew up in and the people there, and your personal feelings. There is no right answer here.

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Offline Pammie

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #5 on: May 09, 2021, 12:41:28 pm »
FWIW, I went to an all-boys high school and I will NOT be attending my reunions going forward. I mean, that would so weird.

...But I definitely will be going to my college reunions. And if I went to a co-ed school, yes, I'd probably go.

Honestly, it really depends on the school, the town you grew up in and the people there, and your personal feelings. There is no right answer here.

Sarah
Agree on all counts


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Offline Chelsealouise

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #6 on: May 09, 2021, 12:44:26 pm »
I don’t blame you! Maybe not much to lose I guess. Are you in contact with anyone else who will be there? X


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I haven't had any contact with the people I went to school with since the last day when we all went our seperate ways in life

Offline Pammie

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #7 on: May 09, 2021, 12:57:46 pm »
I haven't had any contact with the people I went to school with since the last day when we all went our seperate ways in life
I suppose the question is - is the thought of shocking people worth perhaps feeling very out of it and it being a really weird experience?


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Offline RandiL

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #8 on: May 09, 2021, 02:45:47 pm »
I suppose the question is - is the thought of shocking people worth perhaps feeling very out of it and it being a really weird experience?


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Lol, all school reunions are weird experiences where you feel very out of it

The best one I ever attended was my wife's 10th high school reunion where I had a delightful time meeting and interacting with people I never knew before. Maybe they were just avoiding their own weird interactions with classmates.

I want to attend my next high school reunion, but I live 10 hours drive away and it's too soon in my transition to feel the way I want to look.

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Offline Oldandcreaky

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #9 on: May 09, 2021, 03:54:53 pm »
I would only go if you want them clucking about you because that's what they'd do.

Offline Sephirah

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #10 on: May 09, 2021, 04:35:17 pm »
I got a letter through the post the other day inviting me to a school reunion. I don't whether to go or not because obviously I am now a woman and when I was at the school I was a boy

I need some advice firstly what to wear and secondly do I go or not

It's hard to know how to answer that without knowing what that time in your life meant to you.

For me, it was a miserable time. A thoroughly hateful period of my life. And were I in your place I would go simply to get closure on it, and prove to myself that I am better than that. Better than what happened to me. And to see the looks on people's faces. But I can be that way sometimes.

But I am not you, sweetie. And that's a call only you can make. What did that time in your life mean to you? If it didn't mean anything then you don't need to waste your energy thinking about it.

If, however, it was your first experience of people trying to undermine you for being different... then maybe it's worth thinking about just to put that behind you and show people that they didn't succeed.

Offline Jane.Shannon

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #11 on: May 10, 2021, 04:49:34 pm »
I think Sephirah really summed this up well.  Since you don't have connections with your classmates, what is your goal in attending?  If there are people you want to reconnect with then you should go.  If those people are better left in your past, leave them there.
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Offline Rachel

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #12 on: June 05, 2021, 08:53:58 pm »
I have not gone to my school reunions. I went to a male high school and a coed grade school. I was going to go to the grade school reunion but on the day I thought to myself I would have a lot of questions asked and I just did not need the stress. I then thought what if some had an issue or made comments, how would I handle it. I have a lot more resilience now so I think I would go to my grade school reunion if they have another.

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Offline Rakel

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #13 on: June 06, 2021, 07:22:13 am »
I got a letter through the post the other day inviting me to a school reunion. I don't whether to go or not because obviously I am now a woman and when I was at the school I was a boy

I need some advice firstly what to wear and secondly do I go or not

Always a question.





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Offline noleen111

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #14 on: June 09, 2021, 04:21:29 am »
I got a letter through the post the other day inviting me to a school reunion. I don't whether to go or not because obviously I am now a woman and when I was at the school I was a boy

I need some advice firstly what to wear and secondly do I go or not

personally I would not go to any of my high school reunions. I too have had no contact with anyone since I left school. Then again I was bit of loner at school, so I doubt anyone would miss me.. but the shy loner boy that  went to school is long dead.. replaced by a confident woman. I dont want to look back.

For you, well you must decide what is right for you. If you do decide to go, what to wear. I would not recommend anything too over the top or in your face, you dont want to seen as a drag queen. I do have some experience, OK not the same, but similar experience

When I transitioned, I was disowned by my parents, after my father death, my mother reached out too me, we reconciled. That first time we met in person, I was not sure what to wear, as she had never seen me as Noleen and I was like 2 years into HRT, so there were noticeable physical changes.  So I  decided not to go in her face. i never wore a dress, I wore pants with my nice conservative top, not too much cleavage shown off. I did wear heels (a pair of ankle boots), with some makeup. I did not want to shock her too much, yes she had seen pictures during our early chats after she reached out, so seeing her "son" as woman was not a total shock.
 
I know a school union and people you have had no contact is different, but my experience may help in selecting that outfit.
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Offline AllieSF

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Re: School reunion
« Reply #15 on: June 10, 2021, 02:25:13 pm »
Haha!! I too went to an boys school for 3 of my high years, an "all boys Catholic high school"!  Our class of 1965 (yes, some of us are that old!) is one of the more organized and closer alumni classes and we have regular email blasts of upcoming group meetups, fund raisers, etc.  I have occasionally participated in some alumni group chatter through these emails, so many know me.  I have never attended a reunion event, but have also been thinking about it just to see how accepting in God's name are my fellow Catholic alumni!

I probably won't do that.  However, the temptation is truly great!!

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