Community Conversation > Post operative life

"First Time" Fears - Advice?

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thelittlemermaid:
Hey all,

I will be 2 years post-op vaginoplasty in late September and have been in a serious relationship a bit longer than that. While my boyfriend and I regularly have other forms of sex, we only had slight vaginal intercourse once (six months post-op) due to the fact that I am afraid of being too tight for him (he's on the large side, basically the orange dilator in girth but around 7-8 inches) and even stopped dilating for quite a long time due to the pressure I put on myself (trust me, I feel guilty and take full responsibility for both of these things). I am back to dilating and thankfully have not lost depth - however I am still always having to start off with either the purple or blue one. I'm so thankful he's been so patient with me and we very much want to conquer this soon.

Since the first time was so long ago, it feels like this will be our actual first time. Besides dilating beforehand, if anyone has any advice on relaxing the canal/muscles, pain prevention/calming my nerves that I'm too tight for him, I would heavily appreciate it!

warlockmaker:
I remember the first time I had vaginal sex. I was worried I was too tight and before sex I went to the bathroom with my dilator and a big vibrating dildo. I was in the bathroom for 15 minutes and he kept knocking on the door. I came up with some lame excuse. We had sex, he came but I didnt. Guess too much preparation spoiled my mood.

Now 6 years later I have my solution. Guys love watching us masturbate so use your big vibrating dildo and have him play with it. It worked for me, maybe try this approach. BTW I also use 3 fingers in my vagina to widen the entrance if its a big penis. Good luck.

big kim:
I waited 5&1/2 years!

Rachel:
Hi, I have been with some large and wide guys. I really like them because it really puts pressure on my G spot. I would recommend a good amount of lube. I have used a 2 inch toy. I take it slow and after warm up. Orange is 1.5 inches in diameter so if you have depth and 1.5 inches then you should be fine. The penis will alter in shape a bit.

Have him lube (you too). I use Surge Lube. All woman at play arties use lube. Have him go slow. Have him enter very slowly. 

Rachel

big kim:
I can recommend reverse cowgirl for the well endowed!

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