Community Conversation > Male to female transsexual talk (MTF)

No periods. A blessing or a curse?

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CosmicJoke:
Hi everyone. This is a thought that just entered my mind so I thought I would post about it here. We obviously can't carry a pregnancy and deliver a child of our own. It's true that we can adopt or find a surrogate but that still isn't quite the same thing as experiencing pregnancy.
Probably the only blessing I could see about having periods is the ability to become pregnant but other than that there are alot of problems when it comes to PMS. There are headaches, breaking out, and cramps to name a few. These are alot of the problems most biological women complain about and take for granted until they realize they can actually bear children!
Anyway I don't really want kids. I feel like in my case it is a blessing but for somebody else that may be more of a curse. I don't think we should have to have periods in order to be seen as "real" women, but I do sometimes think about it since it's something I clearly cannot do.
So do you think it is a blessing or a curse?

Sephirah:

--- Quote from: CosmicJoke on July 29, 2021, 05:10:40 pm ---Hi everyone. This is a thought that just entered my mind so I thought I would post about it here. We obviously can't carry a pregnancy and deliver a child of our own. It's true that we can adopt or find a surrogate but that still isn't quite the same thing as experiencing pregnancy.
Probably the only blessing I could see about having periods is the ability to become pregnant but other than that there are alot of problems when it comes to PMS. There are headaches, breaking out, and cramps to name a few. These are alot of the problems most biological women complain about and take for granted until they realize they can actually bear children!
Anyway I don't really want kids. I feel like in my case it is a blessing but for somebody else that may be more of a curse. I don't think we should have to have periods in order to be seen as "real" women, but I do sometimes think about it since it's something I clearly cannot do.
So do you think it is a blessing or a curse?

--- End quote ---

Depends who you are, I guess. I mean women who've had a Hysterectomy don't get periods, either. Doesn't make them any less of a woman. Or women who've been through the menopause. As an indicator of womanhood, it's kind of arbitrary and silly, in my opinion.

I know a lot of women pine for the ability to get pregnant. Trans and cis. Carrying a life is something a lot of people wish they could experience, if they can't. And while I would never deny them that, I don't think that's a sign of womanhood either. Come to think of it... I think I just rally against anything that people come up with to outright say "This makes you X, or Y, or Z". Because for the most part I think that's a load of hokum. We make ourselves who we are. Simple as that.

But to answer your question... I don't really think about it one way or the other. I don't, never have, and never will want kids. Of any kind, ever. They annoy me. To my eye, babies all look like Gollum from Lord of the Rings. And act like him until they're in their mid 30s. So... yeah... no thanks. I would be the worst parent in the world, so there is no way I would ever subject someone else to have to deal with that, lol.

I guess for me, it would be a blessing. To not have to deal with one downside while also not having to deal with what I perceive is the other downside. For me it's win-win. But that's just me.

Allie Jayne:
My strongest need was to conceive, have a baby grow inside me, deliver, and nurture them. This I was denied, and even in my senior years, this hurts.  Because of this, I will never see myself as a whole woman. I do not impose my self image on others, this is just how I see myself, so, please don’t think this is how I judge you! We are all different, and my need was to be a mother. Mensural cycles would have been an accepted part of this.

I was fortunate to have had 2 babies via a surrogate (my ex) and I revelled in their nurturing and upbringing. My ex left us when my children were 3 and 5 years old, saying that I was a far better mother than she could ever be. I raised them to wonderful adults on my own, and along the way was invited to join mothers groups, despite me presenting as male. Mothers would tell me I had some kind of aura around me, and they accepted me as one of them, confident to leave their small children in my care.

I still work with children, and my greatest delight is to spend time with my 4 grandchildren.  Children provide my greatest joy, and my greatest regret, but I know this sets me apart from most people.

Hugs,

Allie

noleen111:
I think it depends on your circumstances

For me, its a curse

My female friends do complain about their monthly period, the cramps and the discomfort etc, but I think, i would gladly experience that to have the ability to fall pregnant, carry a child to term and give birth.

This was never an issue for me, until I was a married woman and i found myself wishing that i could give my man a baby. We have adopted so I am still a mother, but I would love to experience the whole pregnancy thing. I found myself quite jealous when my friends started having babies. My best friend, tells me, I have get the best parts of womanhood without the messy parts, honestly I want the messy parts too.

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