Author Topic: Struggling with transition  (Read 439 times)

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Offline LeeWhite85

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Struggling with transition
« on: August 18, 2021, 04:16:48 pm »
Hi, I am middle aged M2F with some issues. 
I am currently in stealth mode working as male during the day and transitioning to female at night.
Now single because of the trans thing and I spent too much time doing work and study.  Divorce laws means she can have the benefit of my income and a different guy who is more fun.   >:(   Divorce laws suck!!!

What do I do for work? AI engineer, drones, dominate the battlefield, biggest impact since the invention of gunpowder.  War will be won by he with the most, cheapest and smartest drones.  Nuclear weapons will be obsolete. (Hint, get out of the USA if you want to live through WW3.  It will be hell on earth. >:-)  more hints: Financial, bio-weapons, EMP, swarms of anti-material and killer drones, cyperwar, Internet destroyed.)

The job pays huge money.  The work place is aggressively male with all the competition that implies.  I love the job because I am as smart as anyone and am really good at finding non-obvious solutions to problems. 

I own a 2 bedroom unit close to work to minimize commute time.  Life is now 8 hours a day at work, 8 hours a day at home doing research and study, 8 hours for sleep and personal admin.  Trans for the night and weekend.

I have grown my hair.  I have waxed and lasered lots of body hair.  Because I LOVE long nails I have qualified as a nail technician so I can do my own nails any time.  (I love the CND Gel products.)  The book "Making Faces" and YouTube was great at teaching me makeup.  (Does everyone else have as much trouble with false eyelashes as I do?) 

I have discovered hormones give me migraines and I am terrified of their long term effects.  They are linked to accelerating dementia (I have a history of dementia in the family). They also impact the hippocampus and memory.
On the plus side I sleep much better when on them, they cure my sleep apnea, and they reduce insulin sensitivity.
Hormones made me gain weight like a pig.  A problem I am still dealing with.  (When people noticed my growing B cup  :) breasts at work they just assumed it was due to weight gain.)

After talking to my endocrinologist I am considering castration and much lower doses of hormones.  I am on to my third endocrinologist.  I haven't found a solution to my problem.  I really want some first hand advice on this.

I am female attracted so would like to continue to use my penis.  SRS is not an option.
My ideal situation would be to pass as attractive older female and be in a "lesbian" relationship with a hot young female or M2F trans AI engineer.  I don't ask for much.  (I pay my current "girlfriend's" bills while she is at University.  Mutually beneficial arrangement for now.)

I just need to solve the problem with ageing too...  ;D

Online Devlyn

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Re: Struggling with transition
« Reply #1 on: August 18, 2021, 04:51:32 pm »
I guess it depends what company you work for, we worked on Raytheon drones, and I transitioned on the job. There were no problems with male aggression from my colleagues.
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Offline Maid Marion

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Re: Struggling with transition
« Reply #2 on: August 18, 2021, 04:57:37 pm »
I am sufficiently valuable at work that I've not had any difficulties growing my hair out and presenting female.  Women's clothes, heels,  and nail polish. 

If you want to pass I'd suggest voice training.  Women modulate their sentences.  If you get really good at it folks can tell when you mean one thing and say another.

I've also learned female mannerisms as well.  I'm used to  folks holding the door for me.  I'm older but apparently  young enough that I have guys checking me out.  I've had a lot of my older friends comment on how young I look.

I have an hourglass figure. I do a lot of squatting while gardening to build up my lower body.  I've been learning to golf.  I've dropped a few pounds and it seems to have come from my waist.   ;D

Offline LeeWhite85

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Re: Struggling with transition
« Reply #3 on: August 18, 2021, 10:08:56 pm »
Please.  Does anyone have experience with effects of castration on:

Libido for a female attracted person.

Sexual function.

Sexual orientation.

If I get castrated I can take way less hormones and the migraines should go away.  The Doctor agrees but I want to hear first hand experience.

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Offline Carla68

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Re: Struggling with transition
« Reply #4 on: August 19, 2021, 05:39:08 am »
Hi Ya,

I had an orchiectomy last July as I hated my testicles and after year of hormones they weren't doing much, obviously without them no testosterone made so no need for my blocker injection, I stayed on the same amount of estrogen

I was still able to get aroused but as my wife has never really been interested in sex not fully tested, I believe there is no guarantee of this result

This year I had the full surgery and still have libido and my orientation is still towards females I will be investigating toys for 2 in the chance wife is interested

good luck



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