Community Conversation > Transitioning

Feeling discouraged about transitioning 😞

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Shipwreckedbard:
I really want to begin transitioning, but I am feeling kind of depressed about it. I know that my family and friends won’t approve, which I’m ok dealing with. The thing that is really bugging me is my body. I’m 6’2 and 260 pounds, I have all the typical high test male features, big hands, big feet, huge shoulders and arms, lots of body hair, and a beer belly. I’m in my early 30’s so I know if I started HRT I probally wouldn’t experience enough physical changes to actually be happy with the way I look. Maybe I should just accept my body the way it is and give up the dream of transitioning. Is there any guys out there like me that transitioned well?

Jessica_Rose:
I didn't start my transition until my mid-50's. I'm 6' 1" and had weighed as much as 220lbs over the years, but I was down to about 195lbs when I started my journey. In 8th grade I wore size 40 pants. I wore men's size 12E shoes and had body hair similar to Tom Selleck. HRT can perform miracles, as can a good surgeon. Lasers and electrolysis can take care of body and facial hair. Exercise, watch what you eat, find a good therapist, do some soul-searching, make sure transitioning is the right path. I was certain that I would be 'one ugly woman', but I decided early on that how I looked didn't matter as much as becoming who I was meant to be. I think I turned out OK.

To paraphrase Friedrich Nietzsche: "He who has a why can bear almost any how."

I was 20 when the photo on the left was taken, 58 in the photo on the right.

Tess100:
Hello Shipwreckedbard,
I have been on a slow path of transition since my 30's, I'm now 54.  My 30's and 40's were spent mainly being a closeted crossdresser.   I have a similar build and body type to what you have described of yourself.  I would encourage you to try some laser sessions to remove body hair.  You might be surprised how your perception of your body changes without the carpet of body hair.  I started hormone therapy at 52 and I'm very happy with the changes that have come from a moderate estrogen only path.  Starting HT and sticking with a moderate dose was also a life changer for me, not only because of the physical changes but because it brought my brain into check.   Lastly I will share that at 54, I'm still traveling along a path of non binary, maybe I fully transition, maybe I navigate the nonbinary path for the rest of my life.

There isn't a wrong body type or age when it comes to figuring out your gender path.  I encourage you to start with some small steps and see what comes of it.  You will be surprise:)

Oldandcreaky:
SWB, I reflect on a couple tall transwomen who don't pass. One is okay with not passing. The other isn't and is contemplating de-transitioning. If you're like the former, you're good to go, whether you'll pass or not.

I am also tall and have wide shoulders. Your height will attract attention. Jessica_Rose runs with her height, donning beautiful dresses crowned with a crimson storm. I shuffle with mine, wearing stained androgynous clothes. Jessica's approach works for her. Mine works for me. There will always be options for you.

Pammie:

--- Quote from: Shipwreckedbard on September 23, 2021, 03:35:18 am ---I really want to begin transitioning, but I am feeling kind of depressed about it. I know that my family and friends won’t approve, which I’m ok dealing with. The thing that is really bugging me is my body. I’m 6’2 and 260 pounds, I have all the typical high test male features, big hands, big feet, huge shoulders and arms, lots of body hair, and a beer belly. I’m in my early 30’s so I know if I started HRT I probally wouldn’t experience enough physical changes to actually be happy with the way I look. Maybe I should just accept my body the way it is and give up the dream of transitioning. Is there any guys out there like me that transitioned well?

--- End quote ---
When I made the first tentative steps along my path I weighed 275 lbs, i was 6’4” (though I’m 6’2” now) and have size 11 (UK) shoes though I never had much body hair.
I changed my lifestyle completely, added in a pretty intensive exercise regime, 20 hrs of laser hair removal and HRT has been wonderful!
It’s all possible!



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