Community Conversation > Coming out of the closet

Considering Socially Transitioning...

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Nadine Spirit:
Thanks for the clarification.  I think I understand a bit more of where you are at.  The line about wanting to "be" transitioned I think tells the most.  Many of us want that.  Transition is messy sometimes.  I know I would rather be at the end of my transition than somewhere in the middle.  However, transition is not an event, it is not a one time thing, it is more like puberty, it takes time, and generally it can be a very uncomfortable time.  But the longer I go through this process the happier I am. 

Oh, and spending about 2 years in voice therapy seriously helped me.  That alone resolved SO many issues for me. 

Good luck.  You can do this, even if it is earlier than you were hoping for. 

Maid Marion:
I had an opportunity to work with a professional speech therapist twenty years ago on modulating my voice.  It helped tremendously. 

Marion

Ellie_Jean:

--- Quote from: Nadine Spirit on November 14, 2021, 08:20:07 am ---Thanks for the clarification.

--- End quote ---

...Sorry if I sounded a little snippy before...I've been kinda moody and under the weather lately; nauseous, hot-flashes, irritability...if it gets any worse I might have to go get myself tested for covid, ugh...hate shots and medical settings. 😖

But yeah...anyhoo; I can be somewhat passive-aggressively bitchy at times and try to keep any sass out of my voice...sometimes with greater or lesser success lol. ...Hope I didn't come off as rude before; sorry if I did. 😣


--- Quote from: Nadine Spirit on November 14, 2021, 08:20:07 am ---I think I understand a bit more of where you are at.  The line about wanting to "be" transitioned I think tells the most.  Many of us want that.

--- End quote ---

Right?! I have to really struggle to not get ticked off when one of my friends or family says, "Well, you wanted to transition!" Ugh...I'm pretty sure nobody WANTS to transition lol; they want to BE transitioned, and they need to begin transitioning in order to make that happen someday lol...or maybe my brain just processes information differently and I'm just bein' CRAZY! 😜


--- Quote from: Nadine Spirit on November 14, 2021, 08:20:07 am ---Transition is messy sometimes.  I know I would rather be at the end of my transition than somewhere in the middle.  However, transition is not an event, it is not a one time thing, it is more like puberty, it takes time, and generally it can be a very uncomfortable time.

--- End quote ---

F'real. I've never cried and screamed into my pillows so much before in my life! 😅


--- Quote from: Nadine Spirit on November 14, 2021, 08:20:07 am ---But the longer I go through this process the happier I am. 

--- End quote ---

Same...I think I'm just going through an unhappy period in my life right now.  😕


--- Quote from: Nadine Spirit on November 14, 2021, 08:20:07 am ---Oh, and spending about 2 years in voice therapy seriously helped me.  That alone resolved SO many issues for me. 

--- End quote ---

--- Quote from: Maid Marion on November 14, 2021, 08:40:19 am ---I had an opportunity to work with a professional speech therapist twenty years ago on modulating my voice.  It helped tremendously. 

--- End quote ---

That's encouraging to hear! 😊

There was supposed to be a clinic just a hundred or so miles south in Missoula that specialized in voice therapy for trans clients specifically, but when I contacted them, they said they didn't offer those services anymore, and redirected me to both a generic hospital, and a children's speech therapist who worked with trans kids, but after contacting the speech therapist's practice, they never got back to me, and I've been too socially anxious to look for options at the generic looking hospital place, fearing that it's just going to be another dead end. I'm unaware of any professional vocal coaches online offering what I need; I've seen plenty of videos and blogs from random people, but I'd really rather have professional quality voice lessons, because I'm scared to death of taking the wrong advice somewhere, and training the wrong way, and end up ruining my voice somehow. ...I really need to be confident that the person instructing me actually KNOWS what they're doing and that it won't end up hurting me in the future lol. ...Sigh...I feel kinda doomed some days. 😣


--- Quote from: Nadine Spirit on November 14, 2021, 08:20:07 am ---Good luck.  You can do this, even if it is earlier than you were hoping for.

--- End quote ---

Thanks for the advice and support! *Hugz* 🥰

Ellie_Jean:
Ugh...I'm going to a party tonight at a local bar with some friends...thinking of trying to present as female...they pretty much all know I'm trans anyway...I'm just super self-conscious and have social anxiety disorder...but I can't just hide FOREVER...ugh...I'm still conflicted on which "me" to go as tonight...I hate parties...mostly just going because it's been too many months since I've seen my friends, and it's starting to get unhealthy lol. 😖

Maid Marion:
Hi Ellie_Jean,

Good luck with the party tonight!

My wife thought I was autistic, but I never got an official diagnosis, as I'm too well off to benefit from one.

Turns out that presenting as a women, I socialize just fine.  It isn't something I have to think about.
I'll interact and realize what I've done after the fact.  I've never heard of another case like this.

Marion

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