Activism and Politics > Discrimination

I need Courtroom Advice

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At the very least, it will damage his credibility if he committed perjury in court.



This is a tough situation and I am having a similar problem with my exwife.  She claims she pays all these expenses as a "room-mate", when in reality her live in boyfriend is paying all the expenses.  He will gladly write her receipts showing she paid.  So even though we each have one minor child, I have to pay her child suppport. 

Of course she is living a much higher standard of living than me and my kids that live with me.  I could supoena her bank records and his and prove that the money is not actually changing hands as they claim, but it is a huge hassle and expense. Not only that but my kids know what is going on. It is something she will have to account for to them for the rest of thier lives.

Also, it is not just what the law in your state says, it's what case law says.  What judges have ruled, precedent.  My exwife is from Tennessee.  In Tennessee, crossdressing is grounds for terminating partental rights under existing case law there.  That means it has survived the appeals process every time anyone has appealed being denied parental rights for crossdressing or being a transsexual.  I made sure that I maintained legal custody of all my children so she can not change their residency without my permission.  I took the kids initially because my son told me she was secretly pricing plane tickets for her and the kids before our split up.

I made sure that a California court had jurisdiction where I could not be discriminated against.  My official advice is that this man is full of anger, now he has you angry. Now you are feeling his anger.  This is what he wants.  Anger is a horribly negative emotion and many times when people are angry they want to make others feel angry too, as punishment for making them angry.  I would say try to resist that.

I know that no one needs to tell you that this is not a fair world, who would know better than you, but sometimes it's just a bad situation and the best one can do is mitigate damage to ones self.   I had a judge that was clearly prejudice against me. But he acted within his discretion under the law.  And they tell you that you have a right to appeal.  But I don't have no money, he knows that from my financial declarations.  So he knows I can't appeal his decisions.  Really, there is nothing I can do.  So instead of spending every day of the rest of my life angry about it, I finally decided to just let it all slide. It won't be like this forever, my kids will grow up an realize what really happened. I  will get by.

Do what you can, and then, let yourself off the hook. I know how frustrating it is and how upsetting it is. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. Good luck.

Love always,

Thanks Elizabeth for that. I do get really mad at him. There are days when I think, we can't change who he is and what he does, and pray that one day it will come back on him. So your kids love you for you? That is all we can ask for. My kids love me still knowing that I will be a man after surgery. My oldest daughter is having a harder time with it. Pam is the one being slandered about to her kids. Taht is hard. I know it is worse because she is with me and not a bio guy. It is good you can turn yourself away from it all and move on with your life.



--- Quote from: Marco on June 23, 2006, 11:15:10 am ---I know it is worse because she is with me and not a bio guy. It is good you can turn yourself away from it all and move on with your life.


--- End quote ---

I think he's just jealous that Pam found a better man than him (as if that were hard ::)).



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