Author Topic: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.  (Read 9397 times)

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Offline V M

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Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #20 on: April 19, 2009, 01:21:39 am »
I try not to let words bother me and if someone pushes it to the point of trying to bother me, my usual response is "Up yours"  :laugh: Different people will do what works for them. OK, no-ones wrong for that unless it harms another. So don't get yourselves worked up on who is pre-op, post-op or non-op. Unless you want trouble from the special-ops (just kidding) The point is... everyone get along and be respectful of each other
The main things to remember in life are Love, Kindness, Understanding and Respect - Always make forward progress

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Offline Miniar

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Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #21 on: April 19, 2009, 09:42:18 am »
(I know this analogy is a bit of a push, but bear with me.)
Try to see it like movies.
We all have our individual tastes and opinions and just because someone likes the original more than the remake doesn't mean it's "better" or that the remake somehow isn't ever as good as the original, it's a matter of that person's personal taste and opinion.

I myself am a touch of a purist in this aspect. I would never feel as if the constructed penis available to me would ever be as good for/to me as an original would be and that is my opinion, not a reflection on the whole of the trans-community.

Just like I tend to sometimes like the original movie, for it's originality of concept and the like, over a remake, whereas others think that the acting, special effects, and overall look of a remake can be far better, making the remake something better than the original. It's all just a matter of personal taste.



"Everyone who has ever built anywhere a new heaven first found the power thereto in his own hell" - Nietzsche

Offline Alyssa M.

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Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #22 on: April 19, 2009, 02:11:14 pm »
There are, I suspect, people who say what Jasmine reports, that SRS results in a "fake" vagina, but who would be offended by people who call them "fake" women. That's hypocritical. The words "artificial" and "fake" are putdowns. Using them legitimizes discrimination against all <not allowed> people. It may be an honest opinion, but it's about as helpful as the opinion of those who dissociate themselves from other trans people. Look, we often expand our definitions. Sometimes that's a good thing.

If it's your opinion -- and frankly, I share this opinion -- that SRS doesn't give you something you can call a "real" vagina, simply state what you feel is "not real" about it, and why that affects your decisions. Don't use the words "unnatural," "fake," and "artificial." They are value-laden slurs. Instead say, "SRS can't fix the problem that I can never bear children, and that is what is important to me," or "I am uncomfortable with using surgury to correct cosmetic problems," or "I don't want to bother with the trouble of dilation," or all of the above, or whatever your particular issue is. See how that's more precise and less judgmental?

Oh god.. we have another one of those "I'm in a higher place than you because I have a vagina" people in here. Get a clue please.  You will always be just as <not allowed> as any non-op no matter what you call yourself.  None-ops are by far not stuck anywhere and in some regards are far more enlightened and realistic than you will ever be.

For the record.. I will be post op soon enough.  My point was, (and it's often missed by those of lower IQ), that everyone has the right to say what they want about things.  It's only insulting if you are so weak minded that you allow something so trivial as someones opinion hurt your ego that much. 

What is this <not allowed> about "There is a growing trend that a lot of trans-women love what's between their legs and feel no need to have SRS".  I really fail to believe that this is even remotely the case.  Anyone trans person who  "loves" the penis they are born with are probably not <not allowed> and instead are people who have taken a fetish or way of life way to far.

Trans people need to get over themselves.. Drama queens..... I see why the general populace can't accept us now. We b#tch and moan to much about nothing.

Please  feel free to try and burn me at the stake for my post.... I know it's coming, but you know what?  The best part about being me.... I really don't give 2 rats butts what anyone else thinks about me except one person in this world and she loves me 100%.  Everyone else can DIAF for all I care.

???

Excuse me? What's with the attitude? Are you implying that anyone who disagrees with you has a low IQ?

And what do you mean that it's only insulting if you're weak-minded? Gee, I guess I'm weak-minded because I find posts by anti-trans bigots on news articles about Angie Zapata to be insulting. Or are you saying that nothing is insulting? When someone says they're insulted by something you say, try to have a little empathy and understand why.

I gather you didn't like what she said and you were offended. You don't have to respond in kind.
All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.

   - Anatole France

Ashley315

Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #23 on: April 19, 2009, 03:24:06 pm »
Not offended by far...  I don't get offended.  I just found it rather pointless and childish and rather like trying to force other people to believe what she believes.  If I want to call your vagina an imitation.. that is my right.  If I don't think it's as good as a natal woman's.. that is my right.

People who let other peoples opinions of things upset them that much are weak minded.  Get over it already people.  "someone called my vagina imitation..... I spent 40k to get it.... therefore everyone must respect it"   BOO HOO... cry to someone who really cares..  There are far more important things to be upset over other than someones opinion of your vagina.  Vagina's are not the center of the universe you know?  Many people get through life without one and live happy productive lives.

I don't care if people disagree with me Alyssa.   That is their right.. It's also well within my right to think of them as being less intelligent for their opinions as it is theirs to think the same of me.  It won't phase me one bit.  Like I said.. I don't care what some on line persons' opinion of me is.

When I see a stupid pointless post like the one started here, I will however call them out on it.  None of us have any right to say what someone else can and can't do providing they are not physically harming them.  This politically correct <not allowed> needs to go away.

JasmineG

Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #24 on: April 19, 2009, 05:47:12 pm »
Not offended by far...  I don't get offended.  I just found it rather pointless and childish and rather like trying to force other people to believe what she believes.  If I want to call your vagina an imitation.. that is my right.  If I don't think it's as good as a natal woman's.. that is my right.

People who let other peoples opinions of things upset them that much are weak minded.  Get over it already people.  "someone called my vagina imitation..... I spent 40k to get it.... therefore everyone must respect it"   BOO HOO... cry to someone who really cares..  There are far more important things to be upset over other than someones opinion of your vagina.  Vagina's are not the center of the universe you know?  Many people get through life without one and live happy productive lives.

I don't care if people disagree with me Alyssa.   That is their right.. It's also well within my right to think of them as being less intelligent for their opinions as it is theirs to think the same of me.  It won't phase me one bit.  Like I said.. I don't care what some on line persons' opinion of me is.

When I see a stupid pointless post like the one started here, I will however call them out on it.  None of us have any right to say what someone else can and can't do providing they are not physically harming them.  This politically correct <not allowed> needs to go away.

Now you see why I say I'm done with the Transsexual/Transgender community and want nothing to do with people known as such?

For the record, I'm intersexed. I'm not transsexual by definition. My medical records say I'm intersexed. Personally speaking, I don't care what any transsexaul/<not allowed> man or woman says about me. What I do have a problem with is when people try to lump me into a group clearly I don't belong too. My point was clearly to say watch what you say because your lumping me or other transexuals girls who have had vaginoplasty could be offensive when you start to call people body parts imitation and fake.

Now before I say anything to insult you or the <not allowed>/transsexual community, I'm going to do what most my friends who are intersexed do and that is stay away from the LBGT community. I'm not gay and I'm not <not allowed> I really don't have a reason to try to be apart this group. I considered myself at one point to be intersexed transsexual and now I feel as though I've made the wrong decision to even add the term transsexual to my identity.

I apologize to anyone that became offended because I asked people to mind their words. So, if you don't mind, I'll just excuse myself from this group of people.

Peace,

Jasmine

imaz

Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #25 on: April 19, 2009, 06:09:38 pm »
Not this one again! ;D

OK, here's mine for what it's worth... I simply prefer to have something natural, whatever that may be, rather  than something not natural. Same goes with breast implants, simply wouldn't want them or want to go out with anyone who had them... Human bodies are nice for me when they are natural, I include hormonally changed ones in that definition.

Let the flaming begin! ;)

Offline Shana A

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Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #26 on: April 19, 2009, 06:20:17 pm »
Human bodies are nice for me when they are natural, I include hormonally changed ones in that definition.

Hormonally challenged! I like that!  ;D

Z
“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” Oscar Wilde



imaz

Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #27 on: April 19, 2009, 06:26:37 pm »
Hormonally challenged! I like that!  ;D

Z

That was "changed"... Freudian slip? ;)

Steady now! I have DSM-IV-TR just 150cm from my keyboard! ;D

Nicky

Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #28 on: April 19, 2009, 07:42:02 pm »
Hi everyone,

I locked this topic. I don't think the conversations have been particulalry constructive. Some of the comments have been rather personal and in some cases people have been left feeling hurt or insulted.

Offline Susan

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Re: Please be careful with words.....They do hurt.
« Reply #29 on: April 19, 2009, 07:53:17 pm »
I have deleted Jasmine for violations of the terms of service and for being just plain argumentative...

9. If you disagree with transgender individuals, or activities which cross gender boundaries take your arguments to a more appropriate web site.

10. Bashing or flaming of any individuals or groups is not acceptable behavior on this web site and will not be tolerated in the slightest for any reason.  This includes but is not limited to:

    * Advocating the separation or exclusion of one or more group from under the Transgender umbrella term
    * Suggesting or claiming that one segment or sub-segment of our community is more legitimate, deserving, or more real than any others

15. You may challenge the issue, but never people or groups.

She is welcome to recreate her account, but she must get rid of the boulder sized chip on her shoulder before doing so. If she comes back and acts like she did before she will be promptly re-deleted without warning.
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