Community Conversation > Non-Op

Has the gender reassignment process given you a new insight to living as a male?

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rogue:
Living as a female full time for 9 years, and now begrudgingly back as a male has left me between two worlds, I dont identify with men...and certainly the minutae of the male world (you must have a  thorough knowledge of football/engines/boxing/usless facts)...and dont get me started on having to use mens toilets.....I digress....I feel my time as Sarah has given me an insight to relationships, I was with a male friend and watched all the little signs a woman he was talking to was giving, I could see clearly shes was into him, and as the conversation ended, I was aching to tell him waht I knew..but it would have been too much information..there have been many other instances where my female experience will alert me to how people are feeling...oh and how women feel about me...lol thats an eye opener...anyway, it would be great to hear your feelings/experiences.
Thanks
Rogue x

Nigella:
I would really like to know why on earth did you detransition after nine years living as a woman? I know its off topic but I can not for the life of me go back to living like that, it was such a dichotomy of feelings.

Stardust

rogue:
The answer is very very long and wordy, in a nutshell I was in a abusive/toxic realtionship, I was acutley isolated, I had lost contact with my psychiatrist, I had incredible money problems, I was suffering from serious depression and a paranoid illness (from such long periods of isolation and stress), a person who alledgeley was my friend made it their business to out me in pubs across town, I lost everyone who mattered to me, and those who stayed turend against me, I was a complete <not allowed> to be around, and after an incident that left me in collapse I decided that I simply wanted to take time out from the pressure to reallign myself, re organise and start agian when I was healthy and strong....that was in 2004.... (theres more to that story...) but its good to be here to share, and maybe help other people on the path.

Nigella:
I'm sorry to hear that, yeah, you need time to discover who you are without any body else. To be you and not be pushed and pulled by other people. We can only be truly ourselves by discovering what we are not.


Take care

Stardust

Lachlann:
... so tell me of these infamous 'signs' girls give.

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