Community Conversation > Male to female transsexual talk (MTF)

Breaking it to my wife slowly

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--- Quote from: Brenda32 on August 28, 2005, 08:46:04 pm ---Paula,

Please don't take this the wrong way, but if you are so sure she will accept you, then what has taken you so long to tell her?  It would seem that if you were that confindent that you would have started this process 3 years ago when you started shaving (if not sooner).  So what made you wait till now?  Just curious.


--- End quote ---

Good question Brenda, I think I really had to come to terms with who I really am myself. I am sure this would have been resolved years ago were I not in the military. Being TG in the military is not an option! So the wall of fear harboring these feeling started to crumble the min I retired. It's still not an easy decision to make and I have agonized over it, asking myself if I am being selfish or self center. I finally have come to terms with myself and make no mistake she could reject me, but she wont. That I am really sure of that in my heart. I just can no longer live this crazy lie that tugs and pulls at my heart daily. It's staring to feel like a huge weight bearing down on me; starting to crush me almost devour my soul. I have to do this for me.. I don’t think I can live without some hope that I can finally be set free.


It sounds like you are really determined and have been working through a lot a personal feelings. I think my concern and many others who have been posting in this thread is that you seem to be overconfident that your lady will accept you as full blown transitioning woman. What if she does not? Are you fully aware and prepared for the consequences? It's not that you shouldn't tell her, you should be honest with the woman you love. But, are you prepared mentally for the possibility that it may all blow up in your face?

Here is a quote from a post I made elsewhere regarding what it means to transition. Keep in mind that everyone close to you will find themselves in the same boat.

--- Quote ---To transition is to take a life that is already upside down and purposely turn it inside out rotate 360 degrees on a three dimensional square of the space time continuum and place it back down in the proper place and in the correct form while trying to keep all other environmental factors and relationships intact.
--- End quote ---

Be prepared for anything.

Good Journey,



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