Hey! I saw this on the non binary forum and I thought I'd give it a whirl! Feel free to answer the question as well down below!
1) Do you use any other terms to define or explain your gender?
I do not use the term genderqueer, sometimes I do describe myself as queer however. At first when I first started to feel different than everyone else, I thought maybe I was genderfluid, and that just didn't seem right. I didn't fluctuate as much as I am simultaneous per say. Then I thought bi gender, but that definition also meant that they fluctuate only just between two genders which was wrong for me too.
Then one day at theatre the word androgynous was brought up in a conversation and it clicked.
My boyfriend told me that androgynous was a fashion style and that it didn't make sense for me to identify as a fashion style (he's still getting used to this non binary thing) at first it offended me but then it made sense, so I learned the difference between androgyNOUS and androGYNE. I use androgyne to describe my gender, but I do try to present androgynous.
So, I AM ANDROGYNE! And I am very proud and happy I finally found what fits me best.
I say I'm demi male; mostly male but feel innately like another gender. For me this is agender. I don't like to look particularly masculine most days and rather I look fem. I feel I don't have a gender. It's hard to explain.
Congrats on finding the right label which fits you; it's a right minefield ::)
Quote from: Elis on January 27, 2018, 05:09:15 PM
Congrats on finding the right label which fits you; it's a right minefield ::)
*giant sigh* uuuuggghhhh yes it is.
Also, when I am in class sometimes gendered issues come up and I normally try to interject and remind people "hey there's more than two genders btw" but I am personally not agender so I don't know how to explain it exactly. I have explained it as off the spectrum or not even in the spectrum before or separate from any gender, how would you describe being agender?
Quote from: punky_glitter on January 27, 2018, 05:13:47 PM
*giant sigh* uuuuggghhhh yes it is.
Also, when I am in class sometimes gendered issues come up and I normally try to interject and remind people "hey there's more than two genders btw" but I am personally not agender so I don't know how to explain it exactly. I have explained it as off the spectrum or not even in the spectrum before or separate from any gender, how would you describe being agender?
It's so hard to describe being agender because most people are something. I guess I just feel innately I'm a person; I don't feel innately I'm male or innately I'm female. I'm just me.
Quote from: punky_glitter on January 27, 2018, 05:13:47 PM
*giant sigh* uuuuggghhhh yes it is.
Also, when I am in class sometimes gendered issues come up and I normally try to interject and remind people "hey there's more than two genders btw" but I am personally not agender so I don't know how to explain it exactly. I have explained it as off the spectrum or not even in the spectrum before or separate from any gender, how would you describe being agender?
The best link for explaining this that I have found so far is our WIKI (https://www.susans.org/wiki/Transgender). It was difficult for me to understand the non binary because I hadn't encountered it before I found this web site. As I was here helping other understand themselves, I had to learn it fast.
How did you grow up with your gender?
I don't have the "I always felt wrong growing up". I grew up as a kid not understanding why I can't be called the same things as a boy and do both girl AND boy things. I've just always done as I want despite the gender roles.
It wasn't until about three years ago I started to feel uncomfortable and part of it is due to living in a foster home and being afraid to get kicked out for being who I was. But once I was living in a secure place (I lived with them before I was actually adopted) I started to experiment and realized that "female" isn't for me. I hate being labeled as female. I don't hate women or female identifying people, it's just the word female on ME personally, feels slimy, it feels wrong It feels like I'm supposed to reject that. Same with boy. Both of them just feel like someone's pouring labels made out of slime all over my body that I just want to squirm out of. However, I do prefer he/him pronouns which are gendered but I lean towards more masculine even though I present as soft androgynous. And after trying to find a label to explain to people in order to come out, none of them fit. As I explained in the last question.
But now I'm afraid that I won't be taken seriously, or what if I'm confused, I know I'm not but what if I allow societal pressure to change me? I digress, but thaat's my experience growing up androgyne
What's your favorite ways of upsetting gender roles / genderbending / gender>-bleeped-<ing?
What I loooove to do is be feminine and wear makeup because I love how it looks. So what I do is I sometimes have hairy legs sometimes shaved and I bind my chest really flat and wear a tight shirt and a skirt and I already have a masculine face but I make it more masculine and I then add extreme makeup. That's actually what I'm doing today. If I don't bind then I straight up give myself a David Bowie as the goblin king pack. Or I wear my typical clothes, a hoodie, baggy jeans, but my face is made softer but not masculine or feminine and wear simple stud earrings. I'm putting together an outfit with platform heels, a skirt, and a masculine shirt and basically Grace Jones masculine and feminine face. It makes me feel great about myself when I can be fabulously wearing makeup while maintaining my androgynous look.
Name some queer heroes, influences, or crushes
DAVID BOWIE.
He is my androgyne inspiration and seriously I love him so much for doing as he is.
It inspires me and makes me feel like I don't have to present a certain way for me to be valid that I can wear and do whatever I want and still be androgyne, even on days where I don't bind my chest and wear makeup.
He is seriously wonderful and makes amazing music that kind relieves me of a lot of things like stress since his music is so bopping, and also it's so much less gendered than most songs. I love Bowie so much.
Dysphoria and how you manage it
I manage dysphoria mostly by complaining and it doesn't help it very much but I manage. Sometimes I just sleep and sometimes I retreat to my boyfriend and ask him to call me handsome. I also talk to my Trans friend and just kinda rant to each other. Sometimes I draw where others can't see it that remind me I am who I am and that I will come out some day.
When did you realize you were Genderqueer?
I realized that I was non binary about two years ago.
What are your favorite physical features of yourself?
I think that my hair is nice most the time and my jawline is very sharp and my eyebrows really define my masculine features. I am also tall and I have smaller breasts so it makes it easier to look, androgyne,
An unpopular or unsure opinion about the GSM community
*I DO NOT MEAN TO OFFEND I AM JUST STATING MY OPINION*
I think that a lot of the younger teens saying that they are genderfluid are confused because everyone feels fluctuation in masculinity and feminity and I think that they are confusing these natural feelings with identity. Just because you feel masculine you are not a boy and just because you feel feminine you are not a girl. It is literally who you are and also a trans woman has more similar in the brain with a cis woman than a man so it is a biological thing and I'm pretty sure your brain makeup doesn't change every other hour. This is kind of offensive and I am sorry if I hurt someone's feelings I know that some people do fluctuate every now and then but the teens being gender fluid just change way too much.