As a cis female, with a MtF partner and other friends who are transitioning.. I have noticed there are some things that MtF females miss out on.. The little hints that are passed down from mother to daughter or friends or things you just figure out while growing up cis.
One of the biggest ones I've noticed is watching some trans girls struggle to put a bra on.
You do not have to do this the hard way!
Spin that darn clasp round to the front between your breasts and do it up, then spin it back around the the back and put your arms through the straps. Who cares if this is "cheating" at least 80% of cis women do it this way too. It's easier.
The other big hint I have is for brushing hair.
For those starting to grow their hair long for the first time, by the time your hair is reaching about shoulder length.
Start brushing from the bottom up!
Brush the tangles out of the ends before brushing the full length of your hair in one stroke.
If you just drag the brush from the top of your hair to the bottom, all the loose knots condense and tangle at the ends and create split ends from damage.
And for the love of goodness if you have just had a hair transplant be careful, I noticed my friend who had days before just had a hair transplant about to brush her hair the "wrong way" which would cause knots and tangles and probably pull at the scars..
Gently untangle the bottom first, before brushing from scalp to ends.
This also applies to wigs, if anyone is looking after their own long length wig and not taking it regularly to be styled at a salon, brush the knots out of the ends of the wig first, if you try and do the whole thing in one motion it will tangle and you will pull out a lot more strands of hair from the wig damaging it.
As a cis woman these are my two biggest tips for MtF trans women I have noticed so far.. Simple things that help make life a little easier.
Do you have any other hints or tips that you wish someone had told you at the start of your transition?
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QuoteSpin that darn clasp round to the front between your breasts and do it up, then spin it back around the the back and put your arms through the straps. Who cares if this is "cheating" at least 80% of cis women do it this way too. It's easier.
That's the way I do it.
Thank you Lilly3,
As an old lifelong crossdresser and having been married for many years I've become fairly adept at the behind the back bra hooks. But yes I will spin it occasionally or if it has more that 3 hooks. I have also become adept at wig ruining. You'd think I'd know better by now but, well yeah.
Thank you again for the tips. (
I hate the recent bastardization of the word "hack") Hacking had a definitive meaning which had nothing to do with providing a tip or shortcut. Sorry, it's a personal pet peeve.
Hugs,
Jeanette
(A collaboration with my partner).
Make-up:
Apply eye makeup first, then foundation/concealer, in case of miscues on your eyes without having to redo everything.
Apply moisturizer first thing in the morning, allowing for absorption by the time you're ready to apply makeup.
Apply eyelash adhesive to post-it note or scrap of paper, curl the paper to match up perfectly with the shape of your lash.
Hair:
Condition hair dry overnight with a cap, wash/condition in the morning.
Twist hair into small "ropes" to find split ends, which will appear as "fuzzies."
Condition ends before shampooing, then wash and condition overall.
Use satin pillowcases to reduce wear/friction on hair and skin wrinkles while sleeping.
Laundry:
Leave several dry bath towels in the dryer to speed up drying or reduce dryer heat setting.
Clothing:
Always test dress lengths by walking towards a mirror, as the movement sometimes reveals surprises not evident at rest.
Erin
My 76 year old mother offered this gem of advice last time we spoke...do not wash your hair every day give it one day of nothing...Give your hair a chance to produce natural oils which help it remain healthy and strong.
Liz
Really cool, thanks. Yeah I do a lot of research but I never thought about how I might have missed out on little things like that. Please post more ideas if you come up with anymore.
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Thanks everyone :)
As Elizabeth mentioned from her grandmother, I also don't wash my hair every day. I would wash it on average every 3 days, showering every day is fine but you just don't need to wash your hair that often, the more you wash it the faster it becomes oily/greasy because I think your body tries to produce more natural oils.
Also try experimenting with a few different shampoos (use one for 2 weeks at a time) and see how your hair changes, different hair types prefer different shampoos.
Testing a dress length by walking toward a mirror is a good one Dayta.
Also yes, definitely let moisturiser soak in for a few minutes before starting your foundation/ makeup routine.
Another one I only recently found out myself is how well primer works! It really helps to improve the wear time of makeup (if makeup says it will last 6 hours, it adds an extra hour or two before it starts to look cake-y) also helps to smooth out pores before foundation.
"Nyx photo loving primer" is a cheap brand but seems to compare really well to expensive brands.
When I told my trans friend about the hair brushing tip, she told me that hints like that were really helpful because sometimes things that seem obvious really aren't! She told me when she first got dressed she didn't know which order to put panties or pantyhose on. (Hint, undies still go on first and pantyhose are just like tights they go on after)(unless you have a fetish)
Feel free to keep adding hints/hacks :)
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Also, To produce wavy hair or curly hair, go to bed with slightly damp hair twisted and wrapped up in a little bun, it will dry that way and produce a nice wave/ body.
(Make sure it is fully dry before you let it out, otherwise it won't work)
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This is such a great thread! Thanks to all for sharing their secrets. I just told my mother-in-law the tip about eye makeup the other day.
So excited to try the tip for curls. In terms of twisting, do you twist a lot of different strands and then pull them into a bun, or do you take all of your hair at once and then twist that? Perhaps they would produce different effects.
I am thinking of going into the salon and asking them to just teach me a few cute hairstyles. Definitely missed out on a lot of this growing up!
So, here is a hair trick I do (I have straight to mildly wavy hair):
No heat curls:
I will wash my hair, and condition and rinse (shave my legs or something with the conditioner in before rinsing), then after a very brief towel dry I will add some leave in conditioner and then comb/brush it all through. Then I wait until it is about half dry and braid it. I can do this before bed, but most of the time I will do a single french down the middle, or two french along the sides and wear that for the day to work. Then I will sleep in it, and shower with a cap on the next morning. After doing all my make up I take it out, tease the braids loose and put in a head band. Mass compliments from this. The next day, I shower cap it again, and the do a high pony with the curly still in. The following day I will either wash it again, or if I have not worked out too much, or worked outside in the garden or something, I will just condition to get another day without shampooing.
Another trick is I will wash, condition, then rinse. Towel dry slightly, put in the leave in conditioner, comb it out, then use my fingers to twist strands and then air dry. No heat curls and waves. I get complimented on that, too.
My avatar is no heat air dry after wash, conditioner, rinse and leave in conditioner and just combed out.
The moral of the story is not to wash every day...
Any ideas for hair that is now dry? Any thoughts on applying oils of any type? Conditioners make it soft but it is still dry.
Monica
I used Garnier Fructis Sleek & Shine Moroccan Sleek Oil Treatment (a little dab will do a lot) when my hair was really dry. I would put that on my towel slightly dried hair and work it through with my fingers. Then I would put in a leave-in conditioner. That seemed to help the dry frizz, split-end look/result I was getting. After not shampooing daily and using that remedy for a while (and getting my ends trimmed) I moved to just a leave-in conditioner and it is finally healthy again. It seems like the summer destroys my hair in t he humidity here in Missouri.
Here's what I do for my dry hair. I do this every 2 weeks or so.
I get some coconut oil, about 2 tablespoons will do. It comes hard so I melt it by putting it in a bowl and putting that bowl in another bowl full of hot water. I've read that microwaving coconut oil will rob it of it's beneficial nutrients.
I completely soak my hair in the oil, comb it through and put my hair up in a bun. It's pretty messy so I contain my hair with a plastic bag or shower cap.
Leave the oil in for a while. Some sources say an hour is enough but most seem to think 4 to 8 hours is better. Some ladies even sleep with it in but I'm afraid the cover would come off and my pillow would get all goopy.
After the wait time wash it out thoroughly and condition like normal. It leaves my hair soft, silky and shiny.
I have a few!
In order to make fishnet hose look good and easier to wear, wear a pair of nude stockings under the fishnets.
Moisturize your nails daily, especially in the winter. This makes your feet and hands look and feel so much better when you get a mani/pedi
If you ride a motorcycle and you have long hair, braid it or use lots of hairbands before riding. I learned this the hard way....
When you shave your legs, rub aloe vera on them as soon as you are done and let air dry. It keeps your legs very soft and smooth
Being the only male in a house full of girls growing up I learned to be a girl too. Mama always taught off of us girls the same techniques.
I might add:
Knees together.
Walk slowly with short step when in heels.
Always wear panties with a mini-skirt.
Never "do it" on the first date, there will probably not be a second.
Be confident.
Here is another one I learned the hard way:
I collect vintage women's clothing from the 60's and 70's. The girl shoes of the era, especially heels and platforms have hard soles that are sometimes slick.
I got a once-in-a-lifetime buy on a pair of authentic real 1970's size 12 cork wedge sandals on eBay. Tried them on, took my first step and it was an instant crash and burn.
The solution was to scuff the soles up with sandpaper to remove the glaze. I've used this trick on other shoes as well with no problems ;-)
Here is one that many do not know about doing nails. After taking care of those cuticles and applying that polish, use a clear coat to protect it. If you want to use glitter, use a clear coat first, and after.
As for wearing short skirts, cheat. With your panties on, put on the skirt, and then a pair of shorts under it. It will surely disappoint anyone upskirting (using a camera to photograph what your crotch looks like).
If I could favorite this thread I would...
Here are some topics I'd like to hear about:
* More clothes shopping best practices(!)
* More hair maintenance real-life lessons
Quote from: Lady Sarah on October 02, 2018, 09:34:02 PM
As for wearing short skirts, cheat. With your panties on, put on the skirt, and then a pair of shorts under it. It will surely disappoint anyone upskirting (using a camera to photograph what your crotch looks like).
This is critical advice, ladies! And a common mistake most newbies make. Take this to heart.
There are male and female versions of tighter fitting, but far less revealing shorts and underwear, that you can wear over your usual selection. (some work great as a gaff as well!) So, you can still get a sleek figure look that also prevents 'up the side of the shorts' looks as well if you're going on a date. The Japanese are masters of this since skirts are common in public school uniforms, and they have specially made shorts many of the girls wear as an unspoken standard. You should be able to purchase some online for a decent price as well, if that's something that interests anyone.
I had a guy try to upskirt me - once. Let's just say this sweet little rabbit went 'monty python' pretty dang fast ~_^ He was the one exposed and humiliated that day.
Along the same lines: never ever climb a ladder in a skirt. Done that on a service call, with the building engineer sitting below the ladder . Yeah.....
I was so in troubleshooting mode I did not really think.
Hugs,
Sarah
Quote from: RabbitSpectre on October 05, 2018, 04:28:24 AM
This is critical advice, ladies! And a common mistake most newbies make. Take this to heart.
There are male and female versions of tighter fitting, but far less revealing shorts and underwear, that you can wear over your usual selection. (some work great as a gaff as well!) So, you can still get a sleek figure look that also prevents 'up the side of the shorts' looks as well if you're going on a date. The Japanese are masters of this since skirts are common in public school uniforms, and they have specially made shorts many of the girls wear as an unspoken standard. You should be able to purchase some online for a decent price as well, if that's something that interests anyone.
I had a guy try to upskirt me - once. Let's just say this sweet little rabbit went 'monty python' pretty dang fast ~_^ He was the one exposed and humiliated that day.
Quote from: RabbitSpectre on October 05, 2018, 04:28:24 AM
I had a guy try to upskirt me - once. Let's just say this sweet little rabbit went 'monty python' pretty dang fast ~_^ He was the one exposed and humiliated that day.
Stiletto heels do a good job on a phone too!
Quote from: sarah1972 on October 05, 2018, 07:03:52 AM
Along the same lines: never ever climb a ladder in a skirt. Done that on a service call, with the building engineer sitting below the ladder . Yeah.....
I was so in troubleshooting mode I did not really think.
Hugs,
Sarah
When it's all about fixing it ;-)
Yeah, we're sisters LOL
A very helpful thread which I shall bookmark. Kylen Kantari also provided useful tips:
Being Socialized Female 101 (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,228377.0.html#msg2025406)
This is a really great thread!
Quote from: RetroTS on October 01, 2018, 11:27:17 AM
In order to make fishnet hose look good and easier to wear, wear a pair of nude stockings under the fishnets.
If like me you have muscular calves even after HRT, RetroTS' tip will also help smooth out the muscle cuts a little.