I was deleted as a "friend" from Facebook today by an old co-worker who's transphobic to begin with, but only deleted me after I officially came out on Facebook yesterday.
I didn't know whether to feel angry or relieved. I have a mixed bag of feelings with this one. Do I base my life on how many "likes" or friends I have on Facebook? No. But it still stings.
How would anyone else feel about this or how have you felt if you've experienced it?
You are not at work to make friends but to do the job that's required and get along with your co workers. If you make friends at work, thats fine but it isn't the reason you are there. I may not be the one to speak because I don't have a face book account but I find face book is sometimes a bit of a popularity contest and I would rather have my friends in real life than a social web site. There is going to be some pruning of your account now that you are out but the people who stay with you will be among your true friends.
I was lucky that no one dropped me after I came out, however, I unfriended my supervisor yesterday because some of his posts could be interpreted as creating a hostile working environment. I don't want to be that sensitive so it's better not to see his personal immaturity.
I lost a few people when I came out, but these were people that I hadn't seen since high school. So that's twenty plus years. Didn't see them before Facebook and I guess I won't see them again. Most people have been very supportive and I've even educated one of my best friends from high school about trans issues and terms because of all the bathroom nonsense.
Not a coworker, but I noticed one old friend I hadn't talked to in ages unfriended me right after I came out. It stings a bit since he'd been my best friend for a while, but we'd drifted and I keep reminding myself that there were decent reasons for it. We weren't likely to be close again, and I hadn't expected him to take it well.
All of you make very valid points.
I suppose the way I'm approaching the coming out process is that my friends and acquaintances may not understand me and/or transgender individuals, but that doesn't mean they can't open their mind a bit. If not, then maybe we were never really friends and it's better off that we part ways amicably.
I see no reason for hostility nor an apology to part ways on the grounds of lack of acceptance.
I just posted a picture of my new license with female as the gender.
If people didn't notice before, the sure did now. I made it my official coming out and surprisingly, I've gotten lots of love from people. Some that I didn't expect. I think I got one semi negative comment and I simply deleted that.
It turned out a lot better than I could have ever expected.
I got one private message from a high school friend that was commenting on a completely different post. He said " I don't know if you know this but it says 'she' in your comment". I replied that that was correct and they apologized thinking I was someone else. I explained that I was trans and that it was still me. They then told me their cousin had done the same thing and that he was happy for me and all was well.
Stuff like that just made my day.