Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 29, 2019, 05:49:57 PM
@Faith
Dear Faith:

As I stated, you have lots of followers and interested readers that are eager to read about your continuing life endeavors... and we want to keep rooting for your success, we are your biggest fans.

Hugs,
Danielle

So it seems, and despite some of my reactions I do very much appreciate all the feedback and support I've received here on Susan's .. so many have become friends and some I've even had the pleasure to meet in person

Quote from: steph2.0 on April 29, 2019, 03:57:50 PM
Now THAT is squeeeworthy!

oo, a SQUEEEEE from Steph. I'm so honored. How did I miss that?

Quote from: Faith on April 29, 2019, 05:58:57 PM
oo, a SQUEEEEE from Steph. I'm so honored. How did I miss that?

@Faith
... and Dear Faith, don't forget that you got a "Wow Whee" from me a few posts earlier.
Hugs,
Danielle

Quote from: Faith on April 29, 2019, 05:58:57 PM
oo, a SQUEEEEE from Steph. I'm so honored. How did I miss that?

Squeees are not given - they are earned. And we shall serve no squeee before its time.

You earned that one, sweetie.

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on April 29, 2019, 06:18:27 PM
@Faith
... and Dear Faith, don't forget that you got a "Wow Whee" from me a few posts earlier.
Hugs,
Danielle

yeah yeah, I know .. but you say that so much  >:(  HAH, just kidding .. thank you It was a moment

Quote from: steph2.0 on April 29, 2019, 06:25:54 PM
Squeees are not given - they are earned. And we shall serve no squeee before its time.

You earned that one, sweetie.

My bro gave me that moment .. I should give him a kiss for it ;D

you know, it's hard just coming up with random posts. I have trouble enough when I have something to actually contribute ... like HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESSICA!!  :D

Quote from: Faith on April 29, 2019, 06:28:43 PM

you know, it's hard just coming up with random posts. I have trouble enough when I have something to actually contribute ... like HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESSICA!!  :D

Thank you so much Faith, I appreciate that 💕💕💕

Wow, I'm a 2.0 now. Strange, I don't feel any different

Quote from: Faith on April 29, 2019, 03:56:08 PM
Oh, I forgot that moment. We were out getting the trailer to load the car on and my brother (1st) said, "And this is my sister, Faith"  ;D ;D ;D

YESSSS!!!!

Isn't that the best feeling?  I get all goose-bumpy when I hear my big brother refer to me as his sister.  Definitely a squeeeee!

Quote from: Faith on April 29, 2019, 07:19:09 PM
Wow, I'm a 2.0 now. Strange, I don't feel any different

@Faith
Dear Faith:
Yes, you are now Version 2.0 ....

... new release, your (software) bugs fixed, you have "new" features added,
quicker and easier download and interface.. 

Compatible with previous 1.0 version release.

I will be eagerly reading your new postings.
HUGS,
Danielle

Quote from: Faith on April 29, 2019, 05:52:33 PM
So it seems, and despite some of my reactions I do very much appreciate all the feedback and support I've received here on Susan's .. so many have become friends and some I've even had the pleasure to meet in person

Quote from: Faith on April 29, 2019, 07:19:09 PM
Wow, I'm a 2.0 now. Strange, I don't feel any different

Face it Faith,

you're one of the cool girls.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Well there look at you all 2.0 .... :D

Quote from: TonyaW on April 30, 2019, 07:28:20 AM
Face it Faith,

you're one of the cool girls.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Faith, I just have to agree with Tonya.....about as cool as it gets!

Tia Anne

Agreed! Welcome to the 2.0 Club, where all the b*tchin' chicks hang out.

Yup! A 2.0 now Faith. Congratulations! It couldn't have happened to a nicer person.

time for some 2.0 updates

- I didn't hit 174, I did hit 170 though .. right in the belly. Time to get serious again.
- the car was fixed on Monday. We left Tuesday morning and got home around midnight heading into Wed. The 'check engine' light came on during the 1st 100 miles, I ignored it. It's still on. I'll have to dig out my code reader.
- The one-liner that I posted in the old thread about getting the email attachment of my signed name-change judgment, well, I looked into that and .... e-certified copies $3.00 + $6.00 processing  :o Nope, not happening. I went to the courthouse in person to get copies at $3.00 each.
- paperwork in hand, we went to Social Security. Well, that was painless. I believe the gentleman doing it has done a few. He was impressed that I had everything that I needed already. Signed and sealed .. Faith Nicole with a big F on his printout .. I should have asked for a copy. Oh well, I was too happy to have it over with. As far as the government is concerned it it's all done.
- on to the ID .. crap, too late in the day. I did try, I made it to the DMV. They checked over my paperwork and were satisfied except .. SS info hadn't made it through the system yet. I have to go back. I'll go tomorrow after work.

Sorry for the abbreviated updates, it's been a long two weeks of no rest. It's just now ending, time to sleep and go to work in the morning .. I need a vacation!!

Hi Faith,

  Congrats on making it home and also on your name changes. I still have some I need to get done but I'm not in much of a hurry for the ones that are left to do. Tell that lovely wife of yours that I said hello.

Hugs,
  Laurie

Quote from: Laurie on May 02, 2019, 12:28:28 AM
... Congrats on making it home and also on your name changes. I still have some I need to get done but I'm not in much of a hurry for the ones that are left to do. Tell that lovely wife of yours that I said hello. ...

She said HI back and when are you coming back to Florida? Ok, so I added that part. I thought maybe you'd consider it more seriously if you thought that she said it.

It was not a vacation, ugh, I am so tired. My eyes are dry and scratchy .. granted, that may be from improper/incomplete mascara cleanup :P ... my nose quit bleeding .. Oh, I didn't mention that. Yep, every day a bloody nose from whatever pollen were floating around up there. By evening it'd be a red tint just to start all over the next morning .. bleech!

very positive feedback while up there though. I don't think I got sir'd or looked at sideways all the time that I was there. It's a comforting feeling. everyone loves my hair .. what's up with that? What about my face? oh, um, never mind, keep looking at my hair .. it's OK :) One gal got really jealous (well, maybe not that bad) when she found out the color and shape was natural. She wanted to know what I did. well, I wash it, I sleep on it, I comb it. Sorry, nothing special, it's just me.

my tired look. I tried to cover it up, here's a Monday Thursday morning for Danielle (since her work-load has lightened) and anyone that wants to look, I suppose ;D although, I don't know why ...............

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/SMqXeoI.jpg)

**dream catcher earrings that were given to me.**

gads, I am so tired. Did I say that already? **yawn**

Quote from: Faith on May 01, 2019, 08:07:24 PM
y, I made it to the DMV. They checked over my paperwork and were satisfied except .. SS info hadn't made it through the system yet. I have to go back. I'll go tomorrow after work.

They really seem not to know what to do around here.  I went to the tax Collector for the ID/Drivers License before I went to the SS office.  I had my two letters with me, they accepted them and gave me the new ID with sex marked as F.  No questions asked.
The next day I went to the SS office, with the same two letters and my new ID, and I did that without any problem, too.

Why wouldn't they look at your hair Faith?  It's gorgeous. Congratulations on your name changes.

Nice to hear Faith and welcome home. Wow! Finally the car is fixed. Congratulations on your name change docs. I'm sure you both need rest after all that has happened. It feels good to be Faith Nicole doesn't it! SQUEEEYAY!!!

Hugs!

Well done dear now you have joined the "correct" name club.

Quote from: randim on May 02, 2019, 10:27:24 AM
Why wouldn't they look at your hair Faith?  It's gorgeous. Congratulations on your name changes.

thank you, on both counts :)

Quote from: Donica on May 02, 2019, 01:46:14 PM
Nice to hear Faith and welcome home. Wow! Finally the car is fixed. Congratulations on your name change docs. I'm sure you both need rest after all that has happened. It feels good to be Faith Nicole doesn't it! SQUEEEYAY!!!

:)

Quote from: davina61 on May 02, 2019, 02:13:48 PM
Well done dear now you have joined the "correct" name club.

and now I have proof!!

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/s9oofdP.jpg)

**disclaimer: Information redacted to protect the not-so innocent.

@Faith
Dear Faith:
Congratulations to you regarding your official name change and your new Drivers License
with your new name, correct Gender and a new beautiful (obviously female) picture.

Hmmm, I also see that you are designated as a SAFE DRIVER  :o ;)

So, again, congratulations are in order for you.... this is all very affirming for you I am certain.
Hugs and more hugs,
Danielle

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on May 02, 2019, 04:12:00 PM
@Faith
Dear Faith:
Congratulations to you regarding your official name change and your new Drivers License
with your new name, correct Gender and a new beautiful (obviously female) picture.

Hmmm, I also see that you are designated as a SAFE DRIVER  :o ;)

So, again, congratulations are in order for you.... this is all very affirming for you I am certain.
Hugs and more hugs,
Danielle

Thank you ;D

Safe driver? of course. Faith has never had a crash HAH!!  Seriously, I've never been in one that was my fault and then only in ones that were unavoidable .. I pay attention

Congratulations on all the updates: your name and that all-important 'F'.

Hey, how did you get a good picture on your driver's license??

What's up Florida taking good pictures for drivers licenses? Both yours and Linde's turned out great. Mines hideous, which is why I never posted a picture of it here.

Congratulations on having all the right papers. 

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 02, 2019, 04:44:07 PM
Congratulations on all the updates: your name and that all-important 'F'.

thank you. F .. YES!!! Both SS and DMV were great and easy to work with. The DMV agent we got asked about my last name. It seems that his fiancé has the same last name. Could be related, the first name matches plenty of relatives in that age group that I lost touch with.

QuoteHey, how did you get a good picture on your driver's license??

I was further away .. distance == looks better ;D

Quote from: TonyaW on May 02, 2019, 04:51:30 PM
What's up Florida taking good pictures for drivers licenses? Both yours and Linde's turned out great. Mines hideous, which is why I never posted a picture of it here.

Congratulations on having all the right papers. 

oh, my previous ones fit right in with the hideous designation, this one was a fluke. It helps that I was feeling really really good :)

Such sweet progress Faith, very happy for you, it's a very affirming step to take to have official ID in correct name / gender and a change that will pay you back over and over.

Best

Cynthia -

things are progressing well, from a legal/id standpoint. I have a lot of changes finished already, just a few more to go. After that, it'll be down to erroneous old mailing lists that I'll have to deal with.

Next 'legal' step with be my birth certificate. I have no idea how that will proceed since I live in FL and born in NY.
I will not be changing my marriage license/certificate. I got married as John, she married John, it's staying that way. We will, however, have a nice signed document stating Faith and Lori when we renew our vows on our 40th anniversary.

Quote from: Faith on May 03, 2019, 05:28:48 AM
......We will, however, have a nice signed document stating Faith and Lori when we renew our vows on our 40th anniversary.

Glad to hear everything is progressing well...reaffirming your vows is a nice touch and I am sure it will be a significant moment for you once again.

Guess there was one benefit to still being in Wisconsin last spring with the ease of getting my birth certificate updated. Not sure why I thought I needed 3 official copies of it though. Probably because they were a lot cheaper than I expected.

Also not changing the marriage license. That was at my wife's request, though I had not thought about it either way.  One of the crappy things I did during a dysphoria episode was not renew our vows when we were in Vegas a number of years ago. Not sure if my wife would be totally comfortable with a renewal yet. We're at 32 years so maybe when we get to 40. You must have gotten married pretty young if you're planning something for your 40th already.

You'll be surprised by all the little things that keep popping up that you want to change your name on. After a year now I'm  pretty close to the point where I can just toss any my that comes addressed to old name.

Since you're a 2.0 d venture that someone that knows about NY birth certificates will be along shortly with some knowledge of that. If you have a passport you don't need your birth certificate to fix that but you do have to use the form for a new one rather than renewal to change the gender marker.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

yeah, a few things. Like the insurance that you mentioned. I should have done that yesterday, I forgot.
Marriage license was my choice, my wife was happy about it and that I was OK with it.

I have all the forms necessary for the birth cert except .. they want a certified copy of the original cert. So, I have to request one from them, just to send it back to them  ::)

no passport. I do plan on getting one as soon as the birth cert is changed

Quote from: Faith on May 02, 2019, 04:54:34 PM
oh, my previous ones fit right in with the hideous designation, this one was a fluke. It helps that I was feeling really really good :)

My old license picture could have fit into a horror picture show.  They either have better equipment now, or Faith and I are so unbeliebte beautiful that even bad equipment makes good pictures of us!  Who knows?

I will meet with the Post Office passport person next week and get my passport going.  They require the same documentation I would need for changing the naturalization certificate.

Quote from: Faith on May 03, 2019, 05:28:48 AM
things are progressing well, from a legal/id standpoint. I have a lot of changes finished already, just a few more to go. After that, it'll be down to erroneous old mailing lists that I'll have to deal with.

Next 'legal' step with be my birth certificate. I have no idea how that will proceed since I live in FL and born in NY.
I will not be changing my marriage license/certificate. I got married as John, she married John, it's staying that way. We will, however, have a nice signed document stating Faith and Lori when we renew our vows on our 40th anniversary.

Which, if any, benefit do you see in updating the birth certificate? 
For me it would be my naturalization certificate, and they want to have close to $600 for doing this!  I wonder if there is any return on investment for this?  I will have my passport gendered right without the certificate, what more would one need?

Quote from: Dietlind on May 03, 2019, 09:23:00 AM
Which, if any, benefit do you see in updating the birth certificate?  .....

Birth Certificate is a requirement to get a passport. I want it to reflect me and to match my id.

The birth cert is a nice to have, I did mine several years ago. You can update US passport even if your old name / gender is present on original birth cert. You just need a Dr letter showing transition completed, and court order showing name change (if applicable).

Best of luck Faith, it's wonderful when it's all done...

C -

Quote from: Faith on May 03, 2019, 09:36:26 AM
Birth Certificate is a requirement to get a passport. I want it to reflect me and to match my id.

what they told me, it is not when you had a passport before.  I have a current dead name one, and that seems to be the only documentation they want to see as proof of citizenship for a new passport.
The new name and the female stuff they take from the judgement and the letters of the health care providers (same as social security).  That's what they told me when I called.

I think the birth certificate may be required if you do not have a passport already, and if you want to change old records like from school, etc.

You need the birth certificate if you never had a passport before.  If you're lucky enough to be able to get the gender marker on the birth certificate changed also,  you won't need the very specific doctor's letter to get it right for your  passport.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Quote from: TonyaW on May 03, 2019, 09:49:03 AM
You need the birth certificate if you never had a passport before.  If you're lucky enough to be able to get the gender marker on the birth certificate changed also,  you won't need the very specific doctor's letter to get it right for your  passport.

that's the plan :)  NY does allow for gender marker change

Speaking of weather (from Danielle's thread), it reminded me of this.

Wednesday after leaving the SS office we saw this:
(https://i.imgur.com/0iW2krx.jpg)
I took it as an omen, a sign, call it what you will :)

It was actually bright & wide enough to start the color spectrum over again and, if you look close, you can see the second one above it .. my phone sucks as a camera.

OMG!!! SQUEEEEEE!!!

This is AMAZING news! and you already did get the new license, with the correct name!! and even better a big "F" on it too. I am sooooo happy for you.

Ohh- Thanks for stopping by the hospital two weeks ago. It was so nice meeting you and Lori and I hope we can soon meet again.

Hugs,

Sarah

Quote from: Faith on May 02, 2019, 03:43:42 PM

Quote from: randim on May 02, 2019, 10:27:24 AM
Why wouldn't they look at your hair Faith?  It's gorgeous. Congratulations on your name changes.

thank you, on both counts :)

Quote from: Donica on May 02, 2019, 01:46:14 PM
Nice to hear Faith and welcome home. Wow! Finally the car is fixed. Congratulations on your name change docs. I'm sure you both need rest after all that has happened. It feels good to be Faith Nicole doesn't it! SQUEEEYAY!!!

:)

Quote from: davina61 on May 02, 2019, 02:13:48 PM
Well done dear now you have joined the "correct" name club.

and now I have proof!!

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/s9oofdP.jpg)

**disclaimer: Information redacted to protect the not-so innocent.

Quote from: sarah1972 on May 03, 2019, 11:16:42 AM
OMG!!! SQUEEEEEE!!!

This is AMAZING news! and you already did get the new license, with the correct name!! and even better a big "F" on it too. I am sooooo happy for you.

Thank you Sarah, not as big as your current happy steps yet still very big for me. I know that due to legalites you have to wait longer for your name .. that time will come!!

Quote
Ohh- Thanks for stopping by the hospital two weeks ago. It was so nice meeting you and Lori and I hope we can soon meet again.

Hugs,

Sarah

Absolutely. It was my pleasure to be able to swing in and not only see you, Jayne as well. We will plan to meet up again. It's not that far and we do need our vacation time  :)

Quote from: Dietlind on May 03, 2019, 09:19:53 AM
My old license picture could have fit into a horror picture show.  They either have better equipment now, or Faith and I are so unbeliebte beautiful that even bad equipment makes good pictures of us!  Who knows?

Oooo! I know! For you and Faith and my sweetie @sassycassie, the "unbelievably beautiful" reason applies. For me it was the "better equipment." The lady said, "you can smile if you want to." I wanted to!!

(https://uploads.tapatalk-cdn.com/20190503/5ef4d2d501b951950d94383e4185b5e4.jpg)

Stephanie

Quote from: steph2.0 on May 03, 2019, 12:18:54 PM
...  For me it was the "better equipment." ...

ah, but we know what the 'better equipment is' and it keeps getting better :D

Quote
The lady said, "you can smile if you want to." I wanted to!!

I was told the same thing, I didn't want to ruin it so I held back

Congratulations Faith, I know from personal experience, just how good it feels to get some official paperwork validating who you are. Well done girlfriend! BTW, in Colorado they don't allow you to smile...but if after five or more tries the smile is still there, you get it on the license. I tried not to smile but couldn't get rid of it.

Love and hugs for the two of you,
Tia Anne & Debi

Quote from: Dietlind on May 03, 2019, 09:44:10 AM
what they told me, it is not when you had a passport before.  I have a current dead name one, and that seems to be the only documentation they want to see as proof of citizenship for a new passport.

That was true for me. I only needed my old passport, my SS card, maybe my driver license, and the gender change letter from my doctor. My passport was long expired, too, but that was okay.

Now if you've never had a passport, the BC is probably required.

Having been born in Michigan, I can't get the gender changed on my BC until after I've had the surgery. You can bet that paperwork will be on the way in late September!!

Stephanie

Quote from: steph2.0 on May 03, 2019, 12:46:50 PM
That was true for me. I only needed my old passport, my SS card, maybe my driver license, and the gender change letter from my doctor. My passport was long expired, too, but that was okay.

Now if you've never had a passport, the BC is probably required.

Having been born in Michigan, I can't get the gender changed on my BC until after I've had the surgery. You can bet that paperwork will be on the way in late September!!

Stephanie

Good luck and enjoy the changed and soon to be correct documentation. I believe that there are four states, my own Ohio in that quartet, that will not change birth certificates at all. Hopefully that will change sometime.....

Quote from: Anne Blake on May 03, 2019, 12:41:52 PM
Congratulations Faith, I know from personal experience, just how good it feels to get some official paperwork validating who you are. Well done girlfriend! BTW, in Colorado they don't allow you to smile...but if after five or more tries the smile is still there, you get it on the license. I tried not to smile but couldn't get rid of it.

Love and hugs for the two of you,
Tia Anne & Debi

I've been bouncy and happy all day. I showed my card to anyone who would look at it :)
I was smiling, I held back so as to not spoil the photo.

love and hugs back atcha!!
Faith and Lori / Lori and Faith

Great DL pictures Faith and Steph! I like mine too. It's my first DL picture I've ever liked.

A while back Lori and I were out shopping. I came across a purse that I really liked. She told me to get it, so I did. Now, I like the purse, still, it seemed a bit plain.

For some time I've been looking at various pins. The downside was having the pin go with any outfit. Well now, the purse needed something and I needed a pin .. so .. here you have it.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FK0SfXq5.jpg&hash=2738eea142868730137977ac63a1ef700f54afbd)
**puppy purchased separately**

---

Today was support group day. It was ok. A few decent things brought up before the conversations went off track. What they did have was some people come in to do makeup. The gal really liked my hair  ;D she also liked the way I already had my makeup done. I told her to go ahead and try something a little different. This is the result


(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FrnrnLbB.jpg&hash=fcafdd0efe265c796e3dfe629a35e53a7cf01275)

Yes, I'm tired. Still, I could overhear the 'pretty' and 'gorgeous' comments. I'm going to get an inflated ego if they keep that up.

I'm on my phone so that's an abbreviated rundown of today.

Oh, and the purse holds more .. you know, like extra emergency tissues.

Quote from: Faith on May 04, 2019, 05:33:58 PM

Today was support group day. It was ok. A few decent things brought up before the conversations went off track. What they did have was some people come in to do makeup. The gal really liked my hair  ;D she also liked the way I already had my makeup done. I told her to go ahead and try something a little different. This is the result


(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FrnrnLbB.jpg&hash=fcafdd0efe265c796e3dfe629a35e53a7cf01275)

Yes, I'm tired. Still, I could overhear the 'pretty' and 'gorgeous' comments. I'm going to get an inflated ego if they keep that up.

Yes, you did look even great sitting in the chair while she was working on you!

They did enhance my makeup, too, and I went right away to Walgreen's, and had my passport pictures for the US and the German passport taken.

I haven't been as active here but I wanted to say how happy I am to hear you are now in version 2.0!  Name changes etc all prove you are crushing it!  Congrats!

not so tired today, phew. I still feel like I could sleep all day though. I can see by the over-abundance of replies that no one wanted to comment on that photo, I don't blame you. I look drugged up and run over after a bad night out.

---

Birth Certificate
IDIOTS! .. I can't get a certified copy of my own birth certificate because my name doesn't match. Lori can request one for me .. I can't get my own .. SAY WHAT!!??!!

On the plus side, I found out that I don't need one to get my birth cert amended anyways, so that saves me about $100.
ON the down side, I need an original notarized DR letter. Mine are original, not notarized. I had to request new letters and now I'm waiting ... again.

---

Went for massages yesterday afternoon. Felt really really good. I don't think I've been called lady so many times in a day, much less in just the hour it took. I was in shorts, t-shirt, no make-up

That's it. You can move along now to more interesting topics. I'm sorry to have distracted you with my ramblings.

Quote from: Faith on May 06, 2019, 09:58:04 AM
Birth Certificate
IDIOTS! .. I can't get a certified copy of my own birth certificate because my name doesn't match. Lori can request one for me .. I can't get my own .. SAY WHAT!!??!!

On the plus side, I found out that I don't need one to get my birth cert amended anyways, so that saves me about $100.

That's it. You can move along now to more interesting topics. I'm sorry to have distracted you with my ramblings.

Interestingly enough this is interesting...
So birth certificate before name change!

Nonsense Faith! I thought your picture looks great. And the puppy too ;D Your hair is getting long. I love it. I'm letting mine grow out long too. I may think about bangs?

Quote from: Donica on May 06, 2019, 04:27:28 PM
Nonsense Faith! I thought your picture looks great. And the puppy too ;D Your hair is getting long. I love it. I'm letting mine grow out long too. I may think about bangs?

true, a nonsense picture but what do you do? Puppy (not really, he's getting old) photo-bombed me. Walked in to take a peek just as I hit the button.

long hair, yep, I get those comments as well .. "Wow, your hair grows fast" .. always has. The reason the front is shorter than the back is because I used to trim the bangs a few times before getting my hair cut. This time around, no trimming. I went from collar length to mid back in ~15 months? Faster than average, not amazingly fast though. Average is ~6" / year. Individuals vary a lot.

Well, Lori and I finally got new phones. Sure, 2018 models. We had to shop price. Here's some selfie camera test shots ...

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/cdUgg0y.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/ctvq3ki.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/Z2z0ZGt.jpg)

That third photo is likely the only time you will ever see me utilize that particular feature.

Quote from: Faith on May 07, 2019, 09:23:20 AM
Well, Lori and I finally got new phones. Sure, 2018 models. We had to shop price. Here's some selfie camera test shots ...

That third photo is likely the only time you will ever see me utilize that particular feature.

Your new phone takes wonderful pictures.....the third one I absolutely love 💕

Quote from: Jessica on May 07, 2019, 09:30:59 AM
Your new phone takes wonderful pictures.....the third one I absolutely love 💕

@Faith   cc: @Jessica
Dear Faith:
The comment reply from Jess is exactly correct...
...your new phone takes wonderful pictures...
BUT it is the person in the photos (YOU) that looks "more" wonderful.

You look beautiful in the pictures, and that last photo is definitely a keeper!!!  Lots of FUN! ;)
Hugs,
Danielle

You look a little sheepish in that last picture. Cute sheep, though!


Stephanie

Quote from: Jessica on May 07, 2019, 09:30:59 AM
Your new phone takes wonderful pictures.....the third one I absolutely love

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on May 07, 2019, 09:39:36 AM
@Faith   cc: @Jessica
Dear Faith:
The comment reply from Jess is exactly correct...
...your new phone takes wonderful pictures...
BUT it is the person in the photos (YOU) that looks "more" wonderful.

You look beautiful in the pictures, and that last photo is definitely a keeper!!!  Lots of FUN! ;)
Hugs,
Danielle

Quote from: steph2.0 on May 07, 2019, 10:00:40 AM
You look a little sheepish in that last picture. Cute sheep, though!

Stephanie

I had all kinds of self-deprecating text written up in reply. I erased them. I need to learn to smile gracefully and say thanks

Well, the thanks are heart-felt at least, I've never been very graceful  :-*


... on the other hand .. the third one? really? *sigh*

You look really nice Faith. Not generally a fan of the stickers, but they can be fun. I used them once, the evidence floating around the forums somewhere.

Who wants a notarized doctor letter? The state department is very specific about how its written for a passport but I didn't need it notarized.  Always possible that they changed the rules since last year.




Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Quote from: TonyaW on May 07, 2019, 11:09:20 AM
... Not generally a fan of the stickers ...

me neither

Quote
Who wants a notarized doctor letter? The state department is very specific about how its written for a passport but I didn't need it notarized.  Always possible that they changed the rules since last year.

New York State, to amend my birth certificate. Everything has to be notarized.

---

ps.

QuoteYou look really nice Faith.

thank you

ACK!!!!!

I just got my car tag renewal notice, old name of course. So I look it up to see about changing it. Well, it seems that you have to change it on the title, filling it out as if you sold it, then take it in to the tax collector and pay pay pay. In Florida it has to be done within 30 days of name change. JEEEZZZZ what else am I going to trip over ....

Quote from: Faith on May 07, 2019, 03:13:29 PM
ACK!!!!!

I just got my car tag renewal notice, old name of course. So I look it up to see about changing it. Well, it seems that you have to change it on the title, filling it out as if you sold it, then take it in to the tax collector and pay pay pay. In Florida it has to be done within 30 days of name change. JEEEZZZZ what else am I going to trip over ....

First... AVATAR! Lovely!

Second, yup. For me it was three cars and two trailers at $58 a pop. Ugh.

@Faith
Dear Faith:
I can feel and understand your frustrations....   just when you think you have the name changes and gender changes on documents.... low and behold, a new one comes in the mail.
 
I got most of the government licenses and documents changed fairly quickly, then titles to my car, home and properties took longer, then my official Accounting licenses and my University diplomas and certificates, my bank and investment documents,    and years later there will still be something that pops up....

All those place have their own set of confusing rules before they will do anything,
nd like you stated...  pay, pay, pay.

Hang in there and work on them as they continue to come in.
Thank you for sharing.

HUGS,
Danielle

Quote from: Faith on May 07, 2019, 03:13:29 PM
ACK!!!!!

I just got my car tag renewal notice, old name of course. So I look it up to see about changing it. Well, it seems that you have to change it on the title, filling it out as if you sold it, then take it in to the tax collector and pay pay pay. In Florida it has to be done within 30 days of name change. JEEEZZZZ what else am I going to trip over ....

Quote from: steph2.0 on May 07, 2019, 03:18:30 PM
First... AVATAR! Lovely! .....

Thank you Stephanie. It was supposed to be  picture of my earrings. I had just posted to Randi referencing why I don't have a profile photo, then I'm chatting with my daughter-sister-in-law-in-law (heeheeheeheee) who gave them to me and I take this photo. Well, it's actually tolerable (for now). So I uploaded it since it was fresh in my mind. So .. it's all Randi's fault

Danielle, yes. I was all ready for surprises .. just not so soon and with the proviso of 'within 30 days'  :o
the price of being me *sigh*  ...... I'll pay it !!  ;D

Yup! And so it starts! The ridiculous "Why do I have to do that?" name change "Why can't you just do" of government hoops we must jump through. And it all changes from state to state apparently.

I did have to do the same thing with my auto title to get my name changed. I just went through the Auto Club. They took care of the whole mess for me. It took about a month to get everything changed over and just when you think you've covered everything, something else jumps up and bites you. I still have to visit the FAA to get my name changed on my pilots license.

Steady as she goes Faith!!! And great avatar girl!!!

Quote from: Faith on May 07, 2019, 03:13:29 PM
ACK!!!!!

I just got my car tag renewal notice, old name of course. So I look it up to see about changing it. Well, it seems that you have to change it on the title, filling it out as if you sold it, then take it in to the tax collector and pay pay pay. In Florida it has to be done within 30 days of name change. JEEEZZZZ what else am I going to trip over ....

Maybe its worth not having a decent picture on my driver's license.  I haven't gotten replacement titles but the registration automatically switched to my correct name when I got my new license.  Address in their system was already updated due to changing that on the auto registrations and only had to change one and all the others updated.

There is no logic to who requires what in order to fix your name.  All I had to do to change my pharmacist license was email a copy of the order but the NABP,  (National Association of Pharmacy Boards which for me only keeps track of continuing education credits) had a special form that needed to be notarized.  And for work I just changed it my self on the HR website and that filtered out to health insurance etc. 
Magazine subscriptions are fairly easy to change but one that often gets forgotten.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

well, it appears that the online documentation is a bit outdated. Of course, the people there didn't know either. I could update the title(s) by transferring them to myself @ $85 apiece. NAH!!!!! All I have to do is sign my old name if/when I sell them. The system will show the name change when it's titled to the new owner.

When I went in I told the gal that it may already be changed, she was like, "No, I don't think so. We don't do that". Sure enough when she pulled up the record for my '84 Camino from years ago, it had my new name. YAY!

So, all in all not a bad day and I did get the tag registration done and it's in my name.

SS - done
DMV - done
Voter registration - done
Tags/title - done
CC's - done
bank card - done .. AND .. I managed to get one issued to me finally. Lori and I now both have our own cards. It only took 29 years  :o
Work - done
Work insurance - not changed yet, should update soon
Utilities - Mostly Lori's name. I changed mine where appropriate.

still more to go, we're getting there though :)

---

Complementary granddaughter photos from my new phone in celebration:

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/qLD5Opf.jpg)

(https://i.imgur.com/AAhfZ6a.jpg)

Quote from: Faith on May 08, 2019, 11:15:56 AM
well, it appears that the online documentation is a bit outdated. Of course, the people there didn't know either. I could update the title(s) by transferring them to myself @ $85 apiece. NAH!!!!! All I have to do is sign my old name if/when I sell them. The system will show the name change when it's titled to the new owner.

When I went in I told the gal that it may already be changed, she was like, "No, I don't think so. We don't do that". Sure enough when she pulled up the record for my '84 Camino from years ago, it had my new name. YAY!

So, all in all not a bad day and I did get the tag registration done and it's in my name.

SS - done
DMV - done
Voter registration - done
Tags/title - done
CC's - done
bank card - done .. AND .. I managed to get one issued to me finally. Lori and I now both have our own cards. It only took 29 years  :o
Work - done
Work insurance - not changed yet, should update soon
Utilities - Mostly Lori's name. I changed mine where appropriate.

still more to go, we're getting there though :)

---

Complementary granddaughter photos from my new phone in celebration:

Now that's a good use of the camera stickers.

I hadn't changed anything regarding our house and had to sign all that stuff twice with an f.k.a. when we sold it.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

I had my daily adventure with my new passport.  I first went to the post office, they said they can't process it because my naturalization certificate is not changed.  They told me to go to the court house.  Ok, I went there, and had a very friendly lady helping me with everything.  one problem, the feds wanted the payment ($110) as a money order.  I had to run to the next post office again, buy a money order, and the clerk kept my spot in line free, so I could continue to work with her.  Her supervisor cross checked the paperwork, and I was told that I can expect my new pass port in about 4 weeks.  They did not see any reason for changing my naturalization certificate, and I like this, changing it i more than $600!  Pretty soon I will have a new pass port with my new name and the gender marker F.

As I went back to the car i had a parking ticket for $54 on it.  I had parked in a reserved for official vehicles area, but I have a handicapped sticker hanging from the mirror, and the law allows o to park in those places.  One super meter maid probably does not know the law.  Now I have to fight the city of Fort Myers to get the ticket removed!

Dietlind! That reminds me. I've never had a passport before but I want to get one now. I need to get started on that.

rough day today. I want to lie down and curl up somewhere. I came close, I found a corner here at work and sat down in it for a while.  No one could see me except the DJ.

I'm still in the jeans and shirt that I changed into last night. Make-up? What's that? I trimmed my nails short as well, after removing any sign of polish.

Therapy today, I do believe it's the first time that she'll see me when I am not all dolled up. Something she's asked me about. My answer was, "I dress up for me." which seemed to satisfy some other part of the question that I wasn't privy to. Today I didn't dress up and that's for me as well.

I can't even get excited about my 2000th post .. whichever one that was.

Quote from: Faith on May 10, 2019, 10:06:06 AM
rough day today. I want to lie down and curl up somewhere. I came close, I found a corner here at work and sat down in it for a while.  No one could see me except the DJ.

I'm still in the jeans and shirt that I changed into last night. Make-up? What's that? I trimmed my nails short as well, after removing any sign of polish.

Therapy today, I do believe it's the first time that she'll see me when I am not all dolled up. Something she's asked me about. My answer was, "I dress up for me." which seemed to satisfy some other part of the question that I wasn't privy to. Today I didn't dress up and that's for me as well.

I can't even get excited about my 2000th post .. whichever one that was.

Eva will understand and help you to find the right path.  I would not know what I would have done along the way without her help!

Quote from: Faith on May 10, 2019, 10:06:06 AM
rough day today. I want to lie down and curl up somewhere. I came close, I found a corner here at work and sat down in it for a while.  No one could see me except the DJ.

I'm still in the jeans and shirt that I changed into last night. Make-up? What's that? I trimmed my nails short as well, after removing any sign of polish.

Therapy today, I do believe it's the first time that she'll see me when I am not all dolled up. Something she's asked me about. My answer was, "I dress up for me." which seemed to satisfy some other part of the question that I wasn't privy to. Today I didn't dress up and that's for me as well.

I can't even get excited about my 2000th post .. whichever one that was.

Always sorry to hear when you're in a funk.
They do seem to be less frequent.
Hope you get through it soon

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

was it only yesterday? feels much longer. 2 days of funk is plenty.

Therapist said, "You're reading too much into it. Did you talk to Lori?" ... yeah, nope
Talked to Lori, "No, I didn't feel that at all"
Why did I feel like crap? Why do I feel like crap? I cannot stand that thought that she looks at me and misses him, I know that she does. *sigh*

---

As an aside from the funk .. Today was my first day at a public pool. Yes, I wore my swim suit, no it was not a bikini. Lori  forbade me from wearing trunk, something about getting arrested :D Well, I had not considered it for a moment.

The closer we got to the pool, the higher my anxiety got. As I walked to the pool, I had my hands full and clutching a towel around me. I went straight to a table and sat there for 30 mins getting hotter and hotter staring at the pool. Finally I got the nerve to walk to the pool and get in .. where my outfit immediately floated up. Excuse me, I wore a skirt type for a reason. I need weights in the hem!!

As we left the gentleman at the counter wished us both a happy mother's day. Apparently we looked like child, mom, and grandMom. CRAP!! I still look old. Why can't I lose 20 years on estrogen???  Fine, take the good, I was gendered correctly :-/

Oh, photos, hmm. Ok. One from today and three from Thursday. No Friday, that was 'in a funk, no makeup jeans day"
ps.  I don't like today's, still here it is.

(https://i.imgur.com/HmkrmCk.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/EF4YWVl.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/xtEw9dk.jpg)  (https://i.imgur.com/FBkY6Bp.jpg)

All of those pictures are GREAT, but 3 and 4 are just plain OUTSTANDING!!! I love that mysterious smile!! [emoji3590]

Mother's Day, not for me. Without understanding why, I fought against any Mother's Day celebrating. Now I look back and know why. Still, even now, I do not wish to be celebrated for Mother's Day. My children have a Mother and she's a great Mom. I was a good Father, was I a great Dad? My children think so and that's what counts. It wasn't and isn't about any particular role that we played in the upbringing, it's who we were, who we are. I'm still Dad, I'll always be their Dad. I would never wish to take that day away from their Mom.

I will celebrate my two daughters for being Moms, I will celebrate my wife for being Mom. I am not Mom, I'm Dad. I can live with that.

For me, I would like to wish my Mom a Happy Mother's Day as Faith. Yet I can't, she is no longer with us. She never got to meet Faith.

Overall just a quiet family day yesterday. Nothing untoward happened. Today is a new week. This week, it's time to get serious about diet and exercise again. I've put on 8 lbs since our vacation-that-wasn't trip. ICK!!

I have great will power, I need to work on my won't power. Instead of "I will take a bite" "I will eat that cookie" I will eat that doughnut" "I will nibble just a little more" I need to change them all to wont's.

Oh, one quiet little comment. Lori and my daughters, and granddaughters, were all outside. I walked out to join them and they were like, "We were just talking about you". It came up about all the gals being outside and the guys inside. The comment was made that, "Nope, not all the gals, Dad is still inside". hmmm .. yeah, I'll take it :)

Awww... so cool! Happy for you!

Glad you had a quiet weekend.

Hugs, Sarah

Quote from: Faith on May 13, 2019, 08:29:46 AM
The comment was made that, "Nope, not all the gals, Dad is still inside". hmmm .. yeah, I'll take it :)

@Faith
Dear Faith:
Overall, in spite of your diet difficulties... I much enjoyed reading your, what I considered to be, a good report.
Yes, after your "vacation" get back to your "will-power" mode and get that extra weight off.

I am rejoicing with you regarding your comment about the gals outside and the guys inside... and you walked outside you heard  "Nope, not all the gals, Dad is still inside".

Have a great day and a good "new" week .....
Again, thank you for sharing.
Hugs and best wishes,
Danielle

Quote from: Faith on May 13, 2019, 08:29:46 AM
Overall just a quiet family day yesterday. Nothing untoward happened. Today is a new week. This week, it's time to get serious about diet and exercise again. I've put on 8 lbs since our vacation-that-wasn't trip. ICK!!

I have great will power, I need to work on my won't power. Instead of "I will take a bite" "I will eat that cookie" I will eat that doughnut" "I will nibble just a little more" I need to change them all to wont's.

Oh, one quiet little comment. Lori and my daughters, and granddaughters, were all outside. I walked out to join them and they were like, "We were just talking about you". It came up about all the gals being outside and the guys inside. The comment was made that, "Nope, not all the gals, Dad is still inside". hmmm .. yeah, I'll take it :)

Quote from: Faith on May 13, 2019, 08:29:46 AM
The comment was made that, "Nope, not all the gals, Dad is still inside". hmmm .. yeah, I'll take it :)

Nice !! Have a great week

C -

I ate my banana
I ate my other banana
I ate my 15 almonds
I drank my coffee
an hour to go before I can eat my salad ... AAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHH *grumble gurgle*

hmm, I do have one small potato ............................................

On to transition seriousness. I still struggle with mirrors. I look as much as I can, I take more selfies than a self-idolizing egotistical teen, then I try to share where others see, reply, try for positive feedback only to get .. more struggle. Will my brain ever give up and just say, enough is enough, yes you're a woman!!

Ok, I got that off my chest .. which wasn't hard since the slopes are fairly low.

Have a Monday selfie

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/qsyRyxA.jpg)

Yes, I tied my hair back .. it was in the way. I really  need to get a haircut.

Very nice Faith, yes you are woman, there I said it, I've been following your thread for a bit now, and I will tell you, I admire folks that step up and post real pictures. I think your selfie today has the "glow" of femininity (IMHO).

The Internet is full of "snap chat filtered computer generated images of what a human might look like in the other gender", I like real.

You're real

C -

Quote from: Faith on May 13, 2019, 10:02:20 AM
On to transition seriousness. I still struggle with mirrors. I look as much as I can, I take more selfies than a self-idolizing egotistical teen, then I try to share where others see, reply, try for positive feedback only to get .. more struggle. Will my brain ever give up and just say, enough is enough, yes you're a woman!!

Ok, I got that off my chest .. which wasn't hard since the slopes are fairly low.

Have a Monday selfie
Yes, I tied my hair back .. it was in the way. I really  need to get a haircut.

As I always told you, you look great!

Quote from: Linde on May 13, 2019, 10:12:35 AM
As I always told you, you look great!

Yes, and most people agree. I'm the one having issues with me *sigh*

Quote from: CynthiaAnn on May 13, 2019, 10:12:16 AM
Very nice Faith, yes you are woman, there I said it, I've been following your thread for a bit now, and I will tell you, I admire folks that step up and post real pictures. I think your selfie today has the "glow" of femininity (IMHO).

The Internet is full of "snap chat filtered computer generated images of what a human might look like in the other gender", I like real.

You're real

C -

Yeah, no, I can't do filtered images. I played with some, what's the point? It's not me. My work ID badge is the only doctored image that I use anymore. It really looks like me now, only younger.

Then there is the really unfiltered .. no makeup (last Friday)

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/t4dOVmz.jpg)

who is that creepy dude

Still, the photo does show that my receding hairline is filling in :)

sorry, my no make-up photo must have scared you all away. I promise not to offend your senses again.

New day, same struggles. mirrors .. ugh; body shape .. ugh; who am I .. uh, yeah, I got that one figured out, sort of, as much as any of us do; partnership - ARRGGHHH. We are so much better off than we were, so much better off than many others - even cis-couples, yet ... there's this line. It's a very thick heavy tall line that I just can't seem to cross. Can't move it, can't climb it, can't go around it. All I can do is erode it and that takes time. I'm in a prison of my own making and it's a life sentence.

sigh

Oh, no, actually I'm in a good mood. I'm just musing and expressing. Want photo proof? naaah, why spoil it ...

Quote from: Faith on May 14, 2019, 05:38:24 AM
sorry, my no make-up photo must have scared you all away. I promise not to offend your senses again.

... there's this line. It's a very thick heavy tall line that I just can't seem to cross. Can't move it, can't climb it, can't go around it. All I can do is erode it and that takes time. I'm in a prison of my own making and it's a life sentence.

sigh

Lines can be erased if you find the right removal tool...I am sure there is one out there just made for you.

Quote from: Faith on May 14, 2019, 05:38:24 AM
sorry, my no make-up photo must have scared you all away. I promise not to offend your senses again.

New day, same struggles. mirrors .. ugh; body shape .. ugh; who am I .. uh, yeah, I got that one figured out, sort of, as much as any of us do; partnership - ARRGGHHH. We are so much better off than we were, so much better off than many others - even cis-couples, yet ... there's this line. It's a very thick heavy tall line that I just can't seem to cross. Can't move it, can't climb it, can't go around it. All I can do is erode it and that takes time. I'm in a prison of my own making and it's a life sentence.

sigh

Oh, no, actually I'm in a good mood. I'm just musing and expressing. Want photo proof? naaah, why spoil it ...

New day, new vibe, I liked the first picture better. Invisible lines we create in our minds, "break on through to the other side" channeling Morrison this morning...

C -

This line isn't in my head. I still need to cross it. Slow process

OH, is this good or bad?

I walked past a male co-worker this morning, long time work friend, anyways we both said good morning yet while I looked at his face to say hi, his eyes never moved up that far   :o

Quote from: Faith on May 14, 2019, 07:32:55 AM
This line isn't in my head. I still need to cross it. Slow process

OH, is this good or bad?

I walked past a male co-worker this morning, long time work friend, anyways we both said good morning yet while I looked at his face to say hi, his eyes never moved up that far   :o

Was he avoiding eye contact or looking at something else? Let's go with stunned by your beauty and didn't want to get caught staring. 

Regarding the pictures from yesterday, biggest difference is the smile. I hate being  the "you should smile more" person, but you look happier in the first one.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

It's hard for guys, think about all the socialization they've been through.

Quote from: Faith on May 14, 2019, 07:32:55 AM
This line isn't in my head. I still need to cross it. Slow process

The walls that won't come down,
We can decorate or climb
Or find a way to get around
'Cause I'm still on your side...
- Coast of Carolina, Jimmy Buffett/Mac McAnally

We're all on your side.

If you can't get across that line, plant flowers on it.

QuoteOH, is this good or bad?

I walked past a male co-worker this morning, long time work friend, anyways we both said good morning yet while I looked at his face to say hi, his eyes never moved up that far   :o

OH, that's good. I have the opposite problem.

Hey buddy, my t*ts are down here!


Stephanie

Quote from: CynthiaAnn on May 14, 2019, 07:46:36 AM
It's hard for guys, think about all the socialization they've been through.

I can't, I'm trying to forget it. ;D

Quote from: steph2.0 on May 14, 2019, 07:48:31 AM

OH, that's good. I have the opposite problem.

Hey buddy, my t*ts are down here!

Stephanie

I don't know what he could see. I can barely see them when I look down at them much less (literally, much less) in the mirror looking straight on. Maybe he was hoping for a glimpse. "Hey buddy, a glimpse is all you get .. blink and they're gone"

a random meaningless post for today, hmm, let me think ..

It was cold in our house yesterday (overworking AC)
I went outside on the steps to warm up a bit
Something was in the air, it hit my sinuses hard within seconds
nasty headache, couldn't breathe, sneezing

Today I'm ... just as bad. I don't know what is was, it was potent.

and there you have it, a high quality post worthy of sharing with no one.
.
.
.
.
.
.
oh, my mood? My mood is fine, I just feel like crap.

@Faith
Dear Faith:
Well, for one, I enjoyed your "everyday life" posting.  ...  and the good news is that
you stated "oh, my mood? My mood is fine"

Wow, Air Conditioning already?   Here it has not broken the 70 deg F mark yet.  It was 61 deg F yesterday and today it may get into the mid or even high 60's  .... but based on past years I do expect warmer temperatures in the next week or so.....   but no air conditioning needed, which is a good thing because there are no homes here have Air Conditioning.

Thank you for sharing.....
Hugs,
Danielle

Quote from: Faith on May 15, 2019, 11:01:04 AM
a random meaningless post for today, hmm, let me think ..

It was cold in our house yesterday (overworking AC)
I went outside on the steps to warm up a bit
Something was in the air, it hit my sinuses hard within seconds
nasty headache, couldn't breathe, sneezing

Today I'm ... just as bad. I don't know what is was, it was potent.

and there you have it, a high quality post worthy of sharing with no one.
.
.
.
.
.
.
oh, my mood? My mood is fine, I just feel like crap.

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on May 15, 2019, 11:43:52 AM
Dear Faith:
Well, for one, I enjoyed your "everyday life" posting.  ...  and the good news is that
you stated "oh, my mood? My mood is fine"

Wow, Air Conditioning already?   Here it has not broken the 70 deg F mark yet.  It was 61 deg F yesterday and today it may get into the mid or even high 60's  .... but based on past years I do expect warmer temperatures in the next week or so.....   but no air conditioning needed, which is a good thing because there are no homes here have Air Conditioning.

Thank you for sharing.....
Hugs,
Danielle

I figured, HEY why only share "I'm feeling down, the world is ending" posts?

Air conditioning, yuppers. We have been hitting mid-80's with high humidity 'feels like 90+' temperatures. Without AC running my house would be a sauna. I have this, aversion?, to running around the house nekked.

Oh, I found a top yesterday, nice fitting, shaped with a tail. I put it on last night and Lori's first comment was, "You need to wear a bra with that" sigh .. sometimes the headlights are on and it's not even dark out.

Quote from: Faith on May 15, 2019, 11:52:00 AM
I figured, HEY why only share "I'm feeling down, the world is ending" posts?

Air conditioning, yuppers. We have been hitting mid-80's with high humidity 'feels like 90+' temperatures. Without AC running my house would be a sauna. I have this, aversion?, to running around the house nekked.

Oh, I found a top yesterday, nice fitting, shaped with a tail. I put it on last night and Lori's first comment was, "You need to wear a bra with that" sigh .. sometimes the headlights are on and it's not even dark out.

@Faith
Dear Faith:
While your followers here do want to read about your difficult times so we can support you with our words and comments, we also LOVE to read about your good and happy and everyday life times.

Well now, that is certainly good news, I would love to see a photo of you in your new top, and yes, it is good news that you do need a bra if your headlights are on... and if they are on most of time and showing in what you wear, that is a very good report indeed.

I needed to wear a bra all the time when I went full-time over 2 1/2 years ago...  my "high-beams" were a distraction to my serious business activities and to my clients.... "Hey... my eyes are up here!"

Thank you for sharing your good moments.
Hugs and best wishes,
Danielle

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on May 15, 2019, 12:04:31 PM
... I would love to see a photo of you in your new top ...

Well, that might be problematic in the short-term. How about a consolation prize of today's daily selfie?
(https://i.imgur.com/h2GNl0B.jpg)
I know, I know, I've put on weight ... it shows in my face :(

Oh, and Danielle (I really wish mentions worked) I'd like to thank you for all your kind words and thoughts. they are always and much appreciated. I tend to forget to thank people properly. A carry-over from him days I think.

Quote from: Faith on May 15, 2019, 12:18:31 PM
Well, that might be problematic in the short-term. How about a consolation prize of today's daily selfie?
(https://i.imgur.com/h2GNl0B.jpg)
I know, I know, I've put on weight ... it shows in my face :(

Oh, and Danielle (I really wish mentions worked) I'd like to thank you for all your kind words and thoughts. they are always and much appreciated. I tend to forget to thank people properly. A carry-over from him days I think.

Very nice today Faith, best of the week so far  :) :)

Quote from: CynthiaAnn on May 15, 2019, 12:35:09 PM
Very nice today Faith, best of the week so far  :) :)

Thank you Cynthia, I do have my days. :)

@Faith
Dear Faith: 
Thank you for posting and sharing your truly beautiful picture of yourself. 
If I were you I would consider making that a new Avatar/Profile picture.

Also, thank you very much for your kind comments.

HUGS,
Danielle

Quote from: Faith on May 15, 2019, 12:18:31 PM
Well, that might be problematic in the short-term. How about a consolation prize of today's daily selfie?

Faith, I love the latest pic!  Your smile is subtle yet powerful!  It looks like you are up to something devious.  I like that! :D

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on May 15, 2019, 01:53:03 PM
@Faith
Dear Faith: 
Thank you for posting and sharing your truly beautiful picture of yourself. 
If I were you I would consider making that a new Avatar/Profile picture.

Also, thank you very much for your kind comments.

HUGS,
Danielle

My pleasure. Sorry though. While I do like the photo, as with all of photos I cannot look at it very long. Thus, my profile/avatar spot must stay empty for the most part. I do try occasionally, sometimes I even manage for a few days. :(  :icon_ashamed: :icon_cry:

Quote from: KathyLauren on May 15, 2019, 01:58:57 PM
Faith, I love the latest pic!  Your smile is subtle yet powerful!  It looks like you are up to something devious.  I like that! :D

It's the 'I have a secret' smile. Hmm, not much 'secret' any more. HAH!!

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on May 15, 2019, 12:04:31 PM
... I would love to see a photo of you in your new top ...

I tried, I really did. I can't do it. I would have deleted the photos as soon as they were taken, except Lori took them on her phone. I'm not allowed.

The only photos worse than my head/shoulder selfies are my full body photos ..
ICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


edit:

I almost forgot. I mailed off my Birth Certificate papers last night. Now it's wait and wait and wait ... Lori's excited. Once I get that we are both going to get our passports because, well, you never know what might happen

Quote from: Faith on May 16, 2019, 05:29:44 AM

I tried, I really did. I can't do it. I would have deleted the photos as soon as they were taken, except Lori took them on her phone. I'm not allowed.

The only photos worse than my head/shoulder selfies are my full body photos ..
ICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


edit:

I almost forgot. I mailed off my Birth Certificate papers last night. Now it's wait and wait and wait ... Lori's excited. Once I get that we are both going to get our passports because, well, you never know what might happen

You've posted some full body pics that were very nice.  I think they were not selfies though, so not posed. It's hard to pose and look natural, especially if you're also working the camera. Lori is going to have to sneak some pictures of you for posting.

Yay on sending out for your new birth certificate.  I had no travel plans when I got my first passport, did it at same time as one of the kids when they were going on a school trip.  Used it within a year, so you never know.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Lovely picture Faith. Often many people are looking at the screen when they snap the selfie. Thus they appear to be looking off to one side or the other. But I can see you are looking straight at the camera lens. I love your choice of lipstick color.

@Tonya .. Yeah, I know. Still, full body is the single most dysphoric image for me.  I will literally break down. Tia and Debi can attest to that.

@Donica. Thank you. Once in a while the make-up applicator does what it's supposed to do.

Speaking of, same thing only different today. My make-up is always a question. Here's a Friday (yes, my hair is still wet)

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/wxjKGfi.jpg)

I may delete this one, it really hits me wrong.

I had a fairly open discussion with a gal here at work (minus TMI type QA, we didn't go there). Apparently ...
- I have style
- even when I 'dress down' due to mood, I have style
- I really 'kill it' when I dress up
- DON'T TOUCH YOUR FACE ..yeah, she was pretty adamant that I should never even consider any type of facial work
- She was unimpressed with my, um, discomfort with my body shape. According to her I worry about it too much.
- I really do have a personality .. who would have thunk it.
- I can pull off 'handsome guy' or 'gorgeous woman' equally. (I showed her some pre-transition photos)

there was a bit more in the conversation, I think that's enough self-praise for now.

Quote from: Faith on May 17, 2019, 05:48:25 AM
I had a fairly open discussion with a gal here at work (minus TMI type QA, we didn't go there). Apparently ...
- I have style
- even when I 'dress down' due to mood, I have style
- I really 'kill it' when I dress up
- DON'T TOUCH YOUR FACE ..yeah, she was pretty adamant that I should never even consider any type of facial work
- She was unimpressed with my, um, discomfort with my body shape. According to her I worry about it too much.
- I really do have a personality .. who would have thunk it.
- I can pull off 'handsome guy' or 'gorgeous woman' equally. (I showed her some pre-transition photos)

there was a bit more in the conversation, I think that's enough self-praise for now.

Praise or criticism are secondary to truth. And truth is secondary to whether or not you choose to believe it. You should.

She must be a very special person to lay it all out like that. Even those closest to me, who I know feel that way, have never used words like that. I'd be glowing.


Stephanie

Sounds like a pleasant discussion was had. Hopefully you'll get comfortable enough with full body shots that we can get a better glimpse of your style. I like the top in your latest pic and would have liked to see more of it. (Please don't take that as pressure to post some pics, do it when you are ready, we can wait.)

It'll come, hormone magic is incredibly slow acting, especially for those of us of a certain age.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

some photos I am more comfortable with than others .. for example ...

.
.
.
.
.
.

FANCY NAILS DAY!!!

(https://i.imgur.com/M4AilRq.jpg)

Quote from: Faith on May 17, 2019, 09:50:08 AM
some photos I am more comfortable with than others .. for example ...

.
.
.
.
.
.

FANCY NAILS DAY!!!

(https://i.imgur.com/M4AilRq.jpg)

love em'

I am into the "green" spectrum myself

C -

Quote from: Faith on May 17, 2019, 09:50:08 AM
some photos I am more comfortable with than others .. for example ...

.
.
.
.
.
.

FANCY NAILS DAY!!!

(https://i.imgur.com/M4AilRq.jpg)

Wow! How awesome!!! Love the color. How was the detail done Faith?

Quote from: Donica on May 17, 2019, 01:51:57 PM
Wow! How awesome!!! Love the color. How was the detail done Faith?

With my current budget it would be Sharpies.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Quote from: Donica on May 17, 2019, 01:51:57 PM
Wow! How awesome!!! Love the color. How was the detail done Faith?

Quote from: steph2.0 on May 17, 2019, 02:00:01 PM
With my current budget it would be Sharpies.

I cheated, I used nail polish strips. They go on like stickers yet they are nail polish. There's a slight learning curve to applying them. I put this set on in 15 mins.

I had these given to me, I can't remember the brand.

Quote from: Faith on May 17, 2019, 02:25:50 PM
I cheated, I used nail polish strips. They go on like stickers yet they are nail polish. There's a slight learning curve to applying them. I put this set on in 15 mins.

I had these given to me, I can't remember the brand.

I admit that when I don't use plain polish, I've been using press-on nails lately. Wally World sells kits for $5.95 and they look fabulous. The only problem is they're really meant for - if you'll excuse the description - skinny b*tches, and those of us with endocrine imbalances that made our hands big use up the big sizes in the package quickly. Still, they're muchly cheaper than a salon.

Quote from: steph2.0 on May 17, 2019, 02:30:36 PM
I admit that when I don't use plain polish, I've been using press-on nails lately. Wally World sells kits for $5.95 and they look fabulous. The only problem is they're really meant for - if you'll excuse the description - skinny b*tches, and those of us with endocrine imbalances that made our hands big use up the big sizes in the package quickly. Still, they're muchly cheaper than a salon.

I don't like the press on nails, at least on me. I do like the polish strips .. no plastic. Plus, if your finger is too fat, the design usually hides it when you apply a 2nd thin strip to it so that it covers (they give you extra). A top coat of clear and done.

Quote from: Faith on May 17, 2019, 02:33:22 PM
I don't like the press on nails, at least on me. I do like the polish strips .. no plastic. Plus, if your finger is too fat, the design usually hides it when you apply a 2nd thin strip to it so that it covers (they give you extra). A top coat of clear and done.

Nice! Maybe they would help with the problem of my nails being so weak that they bend on the ends and the polish chips off. I'll check it out.


- Stephanie

i cant believe i have read every faith post and now I'm chiming in. I've been lurking for a while. i love doing my nails and love giving nail advice. if your nails are not strong try getting some nail oil to rub in every night and any time you use nail polish remover, if you dont want the ends to chip make sure you wrap the tip with the top coat, by that i mean if you paint a clear top coat of polish on the nail make sure you go over the tip of your nail and under it slightly and it keeps the polish on better as it shrinks a little after it dries so it isn't all the way to the end of the nail and that makes it peel up and chip off easier. you can also buy a silicon nail mat, do nail art on it with polish, then wait for it to be dry to touch but not yet brittle and rigid and you can peel it up, cut it to shape, apply clear polish to your nail and stick it right on like a sticker, clear top coat on top to seal it in. means you can do all the nail polish with your dominant hand, you can also use acrylic paint to do nail designs on your nail as you can use a tooth pick to scratch up any mistakes then use a clear coat of polish to seal in you art. a lot of my nail knowledge comes from a youtuber called simplynailogical, she hasn't done a nail art video in a while but if you look at some of her stuff from 2 years or so ago its really useful

ok I'm off to go lurk again, and Faith, you posted on my first ever post on this site, thankyou so much for giving me your input and point of view when i was so confused and in need of advice i really appreciate it! :)

Quote from: Emerald24 on May 17, 2019, 08:16:10 PM
i cant believe i have read every faith post and now I'm chiming in. ....... <snip> ........  ok I'm off to go lurk again, and Faith, you posted on my first ever post on this site, thank you so much for giving me your input and point of view when i was so confused and in need of advice i really appreciate it! :)

:o :o :o

I can't believe that you've read all my posts either .. wow .. that's a daunting task. I don't know how you made it through all that rambling. I hope that after all that effort you got some tidbit of help from it.

there is a lot of more private thoughts that I do not post. If a question arose from all that reading, feel free to send me a PM and ask.

Faith

thankyou faith. when i found out my partner was trans i needed to try to see things from her point of view so i looked for someone's story to read and yours was the first i found. it helped me a lot to figure out how best to support her. :)

Quote from: Emerald24 on May 18, 2019, 01:25:39 PM
thankyou faith. when i found out my partner was trans i needed to try to see things from her point of view so i looked for someone's story to read and yours was the first i found. it helped me a lot to figure out how best to support her. :)

I'm so glad someone did. We (assumption there) don't post and share just to get help, it's also so that others in a similar situation can receive it. Not everyone needing help is in a position to login or post.

While it's best to ask your partner what they need or what you can do, it is not always productive for one reason or another. Questions, on the surface, that seem too hurtful to ask them or they've shut you out due to some internal conflict, etc. Feel free to PM me any question. While I can only answer from my perspective or experience, I'm willing to share what I can.

My mood is suffering. I am still fighting my mental dissonance from having to work on the house. Sure, women are most capable (and a lot do) of tearing up a wood floor and replacing it. For me it shifted my brain into 'him' patterns. Right down to the frustration, cursing, throwing things. I hated every moment of it.

I have done repairs before without having this happen, I don't know what was different this time.

I'm not quite done so ..... I'm at my daughter's house totally ignoring it.

She is capable, she can do it, and she takes hormones that rewire her brain after so long, it's an adjustment.

I find myself with home repair projects having to take a deep breath, as I grab the cordless drill...

Have a nice Sunday  :)

C -

Quote from: Faith on May 19, 2019, 09:29:02 AM
My mood is suffering. I am still fighting my mental dissonance from having to work on the house. Sure, women are most capable (and a lot do) of tearing up a wood floor and replacing it. For me it shifted my brain into 'him' patterns. Right down to the frustration, cursing, throwing things. I hated every moment of it.

I have done repairs before without having this happen, I don't know what was different this time.

I'm not quite done so ..... I'm at my daughter's house totally ignoring it.

Sorry to hear that triggered you.

I didn't feel very feminine doing all the heavy lifting when we moved the kids last year. One thing that helped was I made sure to at least try to dress the part, wore old legging most of the time and always women's cut tshirts.

I know you know that women can do those tasks also. Most of the remodeling TV shows have a woman doing at least some of the work. Do what you need so you know the Faith can do the work. Yeah, that's the hard part.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Still fighting him day. Even Lori sees the difference in my face. Expressions or something .. I know I'm not feeling right. She mentioned me "being checked out" while at the store and "not in a good way"

Today sux

Hi Faith,

Sorry to hear that.  Hope you feel better soon.

Marion

I went back to lurking for a few days.

Why?

I am hurting
I am depressed
I despair

Only a few in private know why, only one from the forums. It is not something that I will share with the world. I wish I had a better update, I had meant to wait until the air cleared ... it is not likely to.

While I interact minimally as it is, lurking behind a vpn as a guest made it easy to not participate. I thought to stay away altogether yet there are those few stories on here I wish to follow which drags me back even if anonymously. I feel others pain so intensely (Emma1017  :'(  ). It makes me want to say something, share something, yet all I have to offer is more pain.

silence is better

shhhhhhh .. listen close and you can hear the world crying.

Quote from: Faith on May 23, 2019, 10:03:35 AM
shhhhhhh .. listen close and you can hear the world crying.

it's so sad because what you say above is true, in the macro sense.

Take care

C -

So sorry to hear about your struggles Faith. We all have such days.

You are a strong woman and I know you will get through this like you have gotten through many other smaller and larger crisis.

One of my friends keeps saying "Time will tell" and to "never give up on your dreams". I know it does sound very cliche but there is still some truth to it.

In any case, here is a big HUG.

Sarah

Hey y'all

Struggles continue. I really don't know what to do about the ones I'm (not)dealing with. Still, I want my friends here to know that I'm around. I have a couple close friends I correspond with to at least verbalize things.

I shared this photo of me from this morning and figured, since I deleted my other ones, that I'd post it. How long will it be here? No idea.

Quote(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F8TgOfOp.jpg&hash=a28f564ff6196b4879107db6e9747405445035a6)

Take care
Faith

Sorry that you are still struggling.  But I'm glad I saw the photo.  Your eyes, that mysterious smile: gorgeous!

Good to see you back

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

back, hmm, sort of considering that I never really left. I just buried my head.

I wish that I could say that what's bothering me has subsided and the sun is shining. Well, it's hasn't. The sun is shining, literally, and they are calling for possible record high's. Mid-90's for sure .. ick ...

Still, if you can't face something, can't fix it, distract yourself from it. That's what I've been trying to do. If I sit down to just relax, my brain takes off and it's all over. Clouds roll in.

I did have another PP appointment last Tuesday. I did not fib on the verbal questionnaire, I answered quite honestly. Lori was in the room so she knows exactly how I've been feeling. I also feel like any changes have stalled. It's not like I had anything dramatic in the first place. I was hoping for more significant changes by now. Even emotionally I feel like I've gone backwards a bit AND my arm and leg hair have taken off like someone put miracle-grow on them. It is very disheartening.

It's the first blood test after switching to injections. I asked for a dosage review.

Ok, back posting again.

Body hair may just be the natural growth cycle and the new growth will thin out eventually. You would want to check the testosterone levels to see, especially if you stopped spiro when starting injecting

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

Oh no, sorry to hear Faith -

Body hair is strange, I had so much growth in my face in the last few weeks, it felt like I had never done any electrolysis, even my electrolysis person was a bit surprised. It can be any number of things triggering this. I was hoping to be done by now but it seems another year or so until everything is gone. I really hate it, but there is little I can do about besides going and get it zapped away.

I know many women with quite some hair on arms and legs.

Stay strong and hopefully enjoy the warm weather!!!

Quote from: Faith on May 26, 2019, 09:52:01 AM
back, hmm, sort of considering that I never really left. I just buried my head.

I wish that I could say that what's bothering me has subsided and the sun is shining. Well, it's hasn't. The sun is shining, literally, and they are calling for possible record high's. Mid-90's for sure .. ick ...

Still, if you can't face something, can't fix it, distract yourself from it. That's what I've been trying to do. If I sit down to just relax, my brain takes off and it's all over. Clouds roll in.

I did have another PP appointment last Tuesday. I did not fib on the verbal questionnaire, I answered quite honestly. Lori was in the room so she knows exactly how I've been feeling. I also feel like any changes have stalled. It's not like I had anything dramatic in the first place. I was hoping for more significant changes by now. Even emotionally I feel like I've gone backwards a bit AND my arm and leg hair have taken off like someone put miracle-grow on them. It is very disheartening.

It's the first blood test after switching to injections. I asked for a dosage review.

it rains, it pours, such is my life. It keeps up and I'll wash away.

I had my PP appointment. I got my chart, and a phone call that went to voicemail .. which I cannot return the call since it's a holiday. Plus, anytime I try to call I don't get anyone. I get to leave a message, then they call back and it goes to my voicemail. Is it so hard to have callerid actually say Planned Parenthood? I do not answer private/blocked numbers.

Anyways. They've suddenly decided that my kidney function is off. Seriously? It's been off since I started, I told them I had stage 3 when I first got there. They are taking me off of spiro and putting me on finasteride. Well, being off spiro doesn't bother me yet I have no idea how effective finasteride will be. I guess it depends partly on the dosage. half pill a day finasteride. I can't even speculate since they didn't state the pill dosage.

If they are taking me off spiro due to potassium .. well, I have normally low potassium and spiro helps that. Also, why didn't they switch to an alternative blocker?

I hate being in the dark on things. They should post my labs for me to see once they make a determination, why should I have to request them?

I shouldn't be surprised. It's not like anything else has been going right lately.

Chin up dear, things always work out in the end. Trust me it works for me , anyways have a virtual BIG HUG.

Hi Faith,

Sorry you are feeling down.

I had been going to the same provider for 6 years for HRT. They do not check for E. I switched providers and my E was 740 ng/dl on the 13th of 14 days subQ. I guess My E went to 1400 ng/dl post injection. So having E and T checked is important. If you are not happy with the HRT then there are others that can provide the care.

With proper suppression of T and a transitioning dose of E (200 to 500 ng/dl) in time your body hair will thin and many will stop growing. It took me 1.5 years of tight HRT control for this to happen.

HRT needs to be in the proper ranges and then it takes time.

I hope you feel better.
Rachel

I know everyone is different, but Spiro was really hard on my kidneys, don't miss it.

Good luck with the new med Faith

C -

Quote from: Faith on May 27, 2019, 03:51:58 PM
... Is it so hard to have callerid actually say Planned Parenthood? I do not answer private/blocked numbers.

Places like Planned Parenthood and others have null caller ID's for safety reasons.  There are a number of organizations that can legally request them. 

I don't answer calls unless the number is someone I know and is in my contacts list.  That way it shows the name I've associated to the number on my screen. 

I hope it all works out for you.
Judi

tl;dr
I don't have a problem with PP as an HRT provider, only with the difficulty of communication outside of appointments

---

last measurement of my levels were well within female range. I have no complaints overall with the actual medical treatment provided by PP or by the personal treatment. Very nice folks.

I get tested every 3 months. The endo is well aware of many aspects of HRT including the multiple testing levels of E and not just the totals. I know this because I asked questions.

My big issue is the limitation in communication. I can request things online and wait. Many pertinent questions are answered with "Make an appointment, ask the clinician"  >:( If I call, they don't answer. You get a 10 minute greeting of options and then voicemail for callback. I don't think that it's too much to ask that when I return a call at their request that I am actually able to speak to someone.

My labs are not released unless I ask them to .. every time. They have not shared them with my GP except for the first time that did it in person and made them do it. They use Quest for labs, the results do not show up in my Quest profile. The tests from my GP do show up there.

No, I still don't have my current results thanks to a holiday weekend and no one answering phones or messages.

---

life ... maybe it's time to quit trying and just "work, home, sleep, repeat". What's the point of struggling if it doesn't get you anywhere? My current level of HRT is all I'll ever receive. All my dysphorias are as strong as ever with no way to reduce them ... I'm tired.

Quote from: Faith on May 28, 2019, 08:03:20 AM
tl;dr
I don't have a problem with PP as an HRT provider, only with the difficulty of communication outside of appointments

---

Which PP do you use?  The one up where you live or the one here in FM?  I might want to change to them, because I have to pay my current endo out of pocket.  He charges $400 per hour!!!!!!!!  And is a basic a****le!  PP can't be nearly as expensive, and might provide better, patient oriented service?

Quote from: Linde on May 28, 2019, 08:38:50 AM
Which PP do you use?  The one up where you live or the one here in FM?  I might want to change to them, because I have to pay my current endo out of pocket.  He charges $400 per hour!!!!!!!!  And is a basic a****le!  PP can't be nearly as expensive, and might provide better, patient oriented service?

Ft Myers, College Pkwy:
we discussed it before. You said that they didn't take your insurance so would end up costing you more.

---

got some results finally
My potassium is just above normal, probably what caused concern for the endo. Couple that with my eGFR at 40, which is lower than it has been. The minimum is supposed to be 60 for my bracket. For comparison, below 15 is dialysis :(

They had a thyroid concern, those levels appear OK

Red Blood Cell count; Hemoglobin; Hematocrit all just outside the normal range on the high side. No idea what that means. I do know that it's been that way for a while.

Total T is 10 ng/dL
Total E is 166 pg/mL

I have no idea what it means overall, except that it's time to revisit my kidney diet and make adjustments.

---

Anyways, since I've made some comments regarding my tests I figured that I would share them.

Quote from: Faith on May 28, 2019, 09:09:02 AM
Ft Myers, College Pkwy:
we discussed it before. You said that they didn't take your insurance so would end up costing you more.

---

got some results finally
My potassium is just above normal, probably what caused concern for the endo. Couple that with my eGFR at 40, which is lower than it has been. The minimum is supposed to be 60 for my bracket. For comparison, below 15 is dialysis :(

They had a thyroid concern, those levels appear OK

Red Blood Cell count; Hemoglobin; Hematocrit all just outside the normal range on the high side. No idea what that means. I do know that it's been that way for a while.

Total T is 10 ng/dL
Total E is 166 pg/mL

I have no idea what it means overall, except that it's time to revisit my kidney diet and make adjustments.

---

Anyways, since I've made some comments regarding my tests I figured that I would share them.

Thanks Faith
At the time we talked about it, I had no idea what idiot I had to deal with, and that he charged for every movement of his hands!  I had to pay $50 for every signed copy of my letter for name and gender changes!  The letter was a canned one, they just put my name in!

My values were

Total T <5 ng/dL
Total E 139.7 pg/mL

Quote from: Linde on May 28, 2019, 10:05:30 AM
Thanks Faith
At the time we talked about it, I had no idea what idiot I had to deal with, and that he charged for every movement of his hands!  I had to pay $50 for every signed copy of my letter for name and gender changes!  The letter was a canned one, they just put my name in!

My values were

Total T <5 ng/dL
Total E 139.7 pg/mL

I didn't pay anything for my letters. I just sent a message and a week or so later my letters showed up (in duplicate)
When I went to do my Birth Cert, NYS wanted notarized. I sent off another message and, same as before, they showed up in duplicate - both properly notarized.

Quote from: Faith on May 28, 2019, 10:30:13 AM
I didn't pay anything for my letters. I just sent a message and a week or so later my letters showed up (in duplicate)
When I went to do my Birth Cert, NYS wanted notarized. I sent off another message and, same as before, they showed up in duplicate - both properly notarized.

At least some things are easy .......

Quote from: Faith on May 28, 2019, 10:30:13 AM
I didn't pay anything for my letters. I just sent a message and a week or so later my letters showed up (in duplicate)
When I went to do my Birth Cert, NYS wanted notarized. I sent off another message and, same as before, they showed up in duplicate - both properly notarized.

Thanks, as i said I landed with a greedy idiot, and I have to change this!

Check and see if they have a website you can sign up for where they post test results. The Quest thing may just need to add them as a provider for you or possibly need a second account.  My regular doctor and the doctor at UW both use the mychart  site but since they're not in the same group I need a separate mychart account for each.

Not sure what you can do for  a land line with caller ID for PP. Of you add them to your contacts on cell phone it would show them. Might need to add multiple numbers for it always to show


Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

I have two quest accounts now .. kind of ridiculous when they know that both of them are me (based on the verification questions asked.

I've added several PP numbers to a contact, doesn't work when it comes in as a private number. I'll have to remind them, again, to email or text first. They've done it before.

ah well, at least idiocy is keeping me distracted from me a little bit.

Yeah if they dial out private it won't come up no matter what you have stored.

You'd think you could at least link different accounts that use the same platform.  Was a little frustrating to have to enter all my info in my UW account when everything they need and more was already in my existing account.

Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

All those lab organizations seem to be different in their customer service approach.  I use LabCorp, because that is close to me.  They do not make the test results available any earlier than 8 days that they gave them to the prescribing doctor.
I like to know my values when I go to the doc, and I tried to fight that, but to no good.  I now just go two weeks prior to my doc appointment to get my blood work done, and thus have the info in hand when I go to discuss it with my doc.

whether it's standard policy or law, I don't know, they all want the records released at least a week to the Dr first before the patient sees them. It gives the Dr time to review and be informed before the patient barges in demanding explanation.

---

Hi Ya'll  .. to whomever didn't get bored and wander to more interesting topics. I'm certainly not the most exciting person on here. Do we get awards for 'Most Boring' or 'Most Uninteresting' ? I think I'm a contender.

Another day goes by. At least the rolling dark storm clouds in my head have calmed down a bit. Still very dark and gray. I was curled up last night on the couch hugging a pillow. Lori asked me if I was feeling depressed. I just held my hand out without replying I didn't feel like talking. I think I side-stepped the question, she is too darn perceptive though. I'll get chastised if she reads this. I'm not worried, much, she can't hardly open the main page on here without my help.

I took a full body selfie this morning ..... I deleted it. It's a new phone and I didn't want to break it already. I'm slowly getting to where I can look at my face for a few seconds, full body .. nope, no way ... !!!!!! WRONG !!!!!!!!

Ugly may be a harsh term yet sometimes it's the most appropriate.

Oh, I know, I'm probably attractive to someone. Some gay guy that doesn't mind a man with boobs .. um .. boobettes. too girlie for non-lesbian gals; too manly for the rest. At least my dog still likes me. And the cat. What's with cats?? Get off my lap already!!!!

Quote from: Faith on May 29, 2019, 05:54:26 AM
whether it's standard policy or law, I don't know, they all want the records released at least a week to the Dr first before the patient sees them. It gives the Dr time to review and be informed before the patient barges in demanding explanation.

---

Hi Ya'll  .. to whomever didn't get bored and wander to more interesting topics. I'm certainly not the most exciting person on here. Do we get awards for 'Most Boring' or 'Most Uninteresting' ? I think I'm a contender.

Its either Florida or the places you go. Probably its that the lab is in my doctor's office. Results get posted over night. I'm know the doctor gets them first though. My last appointment some of them were available during the appointment for labs drawn just before.  Though a few times they didn't call me about them until a day or two later.

I think my thread wins most boring/least interesting. I don't think the crickets even showed after my last couple posts.

And feed the cat.


Sent from my SM-G930T using Tapatalk

I always found this rule of Quest Labs a bit strange. Initially it was even worse, the doctor had to release the values. Now they are at least down to publishing a week after the test.
Most of my doctors share the same patient portal which is nice and anything they enter shows up immediately, including blood tests and other health information. I have specifically looked for doctors participating in this portal so I have everything in one place. It is helpful, my mammogram results took 5 weeks to come from the place but they were in the portal after a few days.

Sorry to hear about the clouds in your head, they will go away too and the sun will be back. I am just glad to read that you feel somewhat better.

I don't thing there is any boring thread here, and you see that there are people responding.

Stay strong!

Hugs,

Sarah

back to self-therapy (after having removed all my photos again). I still take daily selfies as prescribed by my therapist so .....  this is Sarah's fault. If you feel the urge to empty your stomach, blame her.

Quote(https://i.imgur.com/sITFBMD.jpg)

I like your smile in today's picture Faith  :)

I hope you have a great day

Cynthia -

Quote from: Faith on May 29, 2019, 08:57:54 AM
back to self-therapy (after having removed all my photos again). I still take daily selfies as prescribed by my therapist so .....  this is Sarah's fault. If you feel the urge to empty your stomach, blame her.

Hold your head high girl! You are beautiful!

Hugs! Love the lip color too 8)

Awww.. what a nice smile! Thanks for sharing...

You look amazing, I love the color of your top...

Hugs,

Sarah

Quote from: Faith on May 29, 2019, 08:57:54 AM
back to self-therapy (after having removed all my photos again). I still take daily selfies as prescribed by my therapist so .....  this is Sarah's fault. If you feel the urge to empty your stomach, blame her.

thank you gals. I am visually distressed (impaired?) as-in ... I don't see it. I'm trusting others on their opinions. I guess I need to accept the several compliments that I received here at work as well  :-\

that reminds me, as I left the building this morning (for my bit of walking exercise) I passed another gal, who told me I was very pretty today (maybe she wasn't awake yet). Anyways, I spoke to her later to find out that her son is FtM, 6 months on T.

I didn't have the nerve to ask her if she spotted me right off or if someone told her. She hasn't been here long enough to know 'pre-me'

Awesome... I had something similar happen in a rural town in Pennsylvania where I was shopping for a dress... I was super nervous and at some point the sales clerk just said to me: give the hormones a bit more time and you will fill out the dress I was trying... she saw the puzzled look on my face and revealed her son is FTM... we talked about about the struggles and I had a great time shopping afterwards.

I just wish she would have been right about my breast size.

My guess is she figured it out in your case...

But still nice of her!

Hugs,

Sarah

Quote from: Faith on May 29, 2019, 11:31:18 AM
thank you gals. I am visually distressed (impaired?) as-in ... I don't see it. I'm trusting others on their opinions. I guess I need to accept the several compliments that I received here at work as well  :-\

that reminds me, as I left the building this morning (for my bit of walking exercise) I passed another gal, who told me I was very pretty today (maybe she wasn't awake yet). Anyways, I spoke to her later to find out that her son is FtM, 6 months on T.

I didn't have the nerve to ask her if she spotted me right off or if someone told her. She hasn't been here long enough to know 'pre-me'

Quote from: Faith on May 29, 2019, 05:54:26 AM
whether it's standard policy or law, I don't know, they all want the records released at least a week to the Dr first before the patient sees them. It gives the Dr time to review and be informed before the patient barges in demanding explanation.

I use Quest Labs in Arizona and as soon as the test are complete, I can view them. In the past this has worked out well because sometimes my pill pusher hasn't pulled the test results and I provide a copy for her to look over. Other than low alkaline phosphates, my test results are pretty much by the book with the exception of very good cholesterol levels.

Quote from: Dena on May 29, 2019, 11:04:39 PM
I use Quest Labs in Arizona and as soon as the test are complete, I can view them. In the past this has worked out well because sometimes my pill pusher hasn't pulled the test results and I provide a copy for her to look over.

Same story for me. I get a notice from Quest as much as 5 days before I get a notice through my doctor's portal. With my previous endo I'd shown up for an appointment and been asked why I'm there. I reminded them it was to review lab results and then had to show them to them on my phone. Needless to say, that's one (of many) things that prompted me to switch to my family doctor for HRT.


- Stephanie

I got home last night from work and my nephew was there to do some work for us. He hadn't seen me since well before transition (i.e. overweight with a beard) ........ he sure did a dbl-take.

Lori will likely hear some kind of feedback from him today, he's not one to talk through a filter.

Nothing much to add. Scary post in the 'fabulous' thread. I'm trying to stay out so that I don't delete the photos.

Well my nephew is ¿accepting? He said he'd likely always call me by my old name. I gave him my normal response of, "Then I won't answer you, my name is Faith. As long as you try, I'm OK. If you don't try, neither will I." He said it'd be hard, I was like, it gets easier with practice. Then he was like, how about 'Hey'? .. fine :P

Then, as he was getting ready to leave he said, "Good night .. *pause* .. ladies. I guess I have to get used to that. Good night ladies *no pause*". I just smiled at him.

Trying means everything.

---

rough morning. Pounding sinus headache. I took my obligatory morning selfie ... nope, can't share. My headache is too obvious in the photos making me uglier than normal .. sorry .. look less than well.

separate post about my current profile photo, which I'll include here for context since, hopefully, it will change some day soon.

---

(https://i.imgur.com/XVSGg0U.jpg)

---

There are many days that I feel unwanted, unattractive, undesired, which add up to (amongst other things) feeling worthless. No these are not positive constructive thoughts, as pointed out by a certain concerned (and caring) forum member, yet they can be. Say wha..? Sometimes I use a more negative connotation as a step and goad to improve myself. I have to see where I am in order to push myself to where I need to be. I feel that it's always a good thing, especially on a support form, to let those around you know how you feel in a given moment. How can they lend support, even if only verbally, if they don't know that you're hurting? In my mind, the worst thing that I can do is stay silent, which I am wont to do when things get real bad.

Is that sound thinking, probably not since I was the one who thought them (likely not the first person either) still, they are my thoughts and that's one of the things that we are all here for - sharing our thoughts.

---

I've been known to 'lash out' or redirect my negative feelings on to others. I end up alienating them and they keep their distance. That distancing hurts them yet mostly it hurts me. I've done it here on the forums. .. I miss those with whom I've do this to yet I can't take it back. Sorry is not a fix-all. That's something that I've tried to teach my children and
now my grandchildren. Saying that you're sorry only expresses your acknowledgement of your error, it does not fix things. Better to not have a reason to say that you're sorry. Yet, we're human, we screw up, then we have to deal with the consequences.

Apologies are a necessary first step in bridging a gap created by you. After that, it's up to them to reach out. So, here it is .... I'm sorry.

Have a glorious day everyone
Faith

Hey everyone. Sorry to see the lost '¿years?'  I saved a PDF of mine at some point and has the date of my last post in this topic of Feb 27th, 2022.  I have zero idea of when my last actual contribution on any topic was.

outline of me, for those that forgot or never knew me .. you know, in case anyone actually reads this.
March 2024 will be 6 years HRT and also out full time
Legal name with gender marker change, legal birth certificate name/gender change.

Life moves forward. Really, nothing much new to add even after all this time.  Does my first death threat count?  eh. I've been playing in the band for about a year and a half. June 2022, as I recall, was my first show with them after following them for a while. My drummer buddy had been after me for years to play bass in the group, he finally wore me down.

I had to drop Planned Parenthood. I didn't like how they were conducting my care and planned to switch, then Fl passed their "must see a Dr in person" law which made it mandatory since PP was using Nurse Practitioners. I am happy with the new Dr.

Here's a Christmas selfie
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FMrtlLjmm.jpg&hash=d745846549eda1691406aae12635be38916ad5dc) (https://imgur.com/MrtlLjm)

@Faith
Dear Faith:
I am thrilled to see that you were able to return to the Forum after
the New Year's Day crash...
.... and you have posted and shared your lovely photo too... a bonus
for your followers such as myself.

Again, it is wonderful to see that you were able to get back on the Forum.

HUGS, Danielle

Looking great dear, good to see you again. XXX

Hi Faith,

Great to hear that you were able to find a new doctor that you like!

Marion

Welcome back gorgeous sister!!!... Rock On bass girl and be careful with death threats! 😬

Hugs and Lotsa Love!

A 😀💕🌻

Hi, Faith.  Good to see you!  I am glad you are still posting.  I saw your recent band pics which popped up on FB.  Looking good!

I've entered a huge gray where progress and results may or may not occur. I don't talk about it to friends or family, other than my spouse. Quite simply, it's none of their business.

Last Friday (Feb 2nd) I had my initial consultation for bottom surgery. It went well, promising. A lot can still interfere with proceeding yet I am trying to be optimistic.

My spouse had finally said, "Just get it done already"  :P  Note: not in exasperation, she honestly just wants me to have it done for myself and to quit waffling about it.

Work knows I have a possible surgery coming up with long-term work-from-home considerations. They are onboard. I mean, it really has no direct effect on my work. Right now I drive in to remote into other systems, which I can do quite readily from home.

There you go dear the stars are aligned , things happen at the right time I find. Good wishes for when you get the go ahead.

Good to see you back Faith!

Hugs!
Donica

slow progress yet quickly?

I have two calls today with two different therapists for 2nd letter. In actuality it doesn't matter which one I choose. I still feel better having a 15 minute free call to discuss expectations and see if I can relate to the therapist before paying for an hour or so. I mean, they aren't going to be my primary therapist so it's a one-off. Still, I'd rather be comfortable with them as a person before I answer a bunch of personal questions.

Surgeon is already in touch with my nephrologist to clear me for surgery. Next Tuesday I have a Dr appointment for all the physical checkups required. How'd they put it  .. "Primary care evaluation and risk stratification for surgery"

Insurance .. *GASP* .. they checked with my insurance and say that it's covered 100%. I find it difficult to believe that the hard exclusion was removed but if that's the case I am more than happy to not pay the full cost out-of-pocket. Yes, I was/am prepared to do that.

In other news  .. yeah, I got nothing. This is taking up most of my mental space right now. The whole gambit of emotional twists and turns. The worst is expecting an anvil to drop and not be able to proceed.

Hi Faith,

Good luck in getting everything approved for surgery.

Marion

Hi Faith

Best wishes for the future and I hope you get the ok for surgery to go ahead.

Kind regards and hugs
Sarah B

Quote from: Faith on February 16, 2024, 06:14:38 AMSurgeon is already in touch with my nephrologist to clear me for surgery.

We're so excited for you! Hugs to your wife for giving you the needed kick in the butt.

QuoteIn other news  .. yeah, I got nothing. This is taking up most of my mental space right now.

We understand.

I just finished a full morning of prerequisite testing that the surgeon wants before even considering scheduling. So far no red flags. They actually expidited the tests for me. Full physical, ekg, xray, bloodwork. I should have final results within a week.

This afternoon is both therapists specifically for my letters.

I am sure you will fly through. XXX

This is the part of the process that make me the most nervous. Waiting for others to give me permission to do what I want to do. I realize they just want to make sure I'm healthy enough to have certain procedures, but it always makes me really anxious. I hope all of the test results added together result in an approval.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Two therapist letters down. Awaiting pee and blood test results. I know it'll be a bit abnormal but hopefully not to the point of stopping surgery

@Faith
Dear Faith:

I am eagerly looking forward to your next and latest update...

HUGS, Danielle 

Now the gangs together, welcome to the basement. Pull up a chair and stick some tunes on.

Quote from: davina61 on February 22, 2024, 02:36:02 PMNow the gangs together, welcome to the basement. Pull up a chair and stick some tunes on.

I could use me some Tennessee Whiskey 😜


Not much to update. I have my letters and medical clearance. The surgeon submitted it to insurance for pre-approval. They responded with the generic "is this medically necessary" *sigh*

No real update. Insurance Specialist at surgeons office emailed. It can take 2-3 weeks before receiving an approval or denial response. My impatience is increasing steadily at this point. I waited for years, what's a few weeks?  arrrggghhhh

One of my favorite Susan's Place quotes -- 'I want patience, and I want it now!'

Good luck, Faith!

Love always -- Jess

So, the answer is as I expected: Denied by explicit policy exclusion. It doesn't change that fact that I am disheartened. I fought all day yesterday not to cry about it, it hit me hard.

I still don't have a self-pay price from the place. They kept giving me a non-answer of 'waiting on insurance' or 'prohibitively expensive'. How do I know, or they know, if it's out of my self-pay range if they don't tell me what it is? I have money put away expecting to pay upfront.

life sucks

Sorry that they keep denying your giving you non response. I hope that changes soon for you. Hugs
Mariah

Unless something drastic and unexpected happens, it looks like surgery is out.

Still explicitly excluded in our insurance policy - They get away with it because it's a fully company self-funded plan. It is the only explicit exclusion in the policy.

I can't do self pay. The surgeon I was working with charges 75k. While I could do it out of pocket, I cannot in good conscience take those funds away from the household. Besides the fact that the surgeon refuses to take self-pay. Their answer was "oh, it's just 8 months, wait until open enrollment and get a good insurance policy" .. at 2k a month? Yeah, right.

So sorry you have to deal with this Faith. Insurance companies are nothing but legal fraud companies. I get a book from my insurance explaining the policy every year. It might as well be written in a foreign language for all I can understand of it.
Stay strong Faith. When one door closes, another one opens.
Hugs Gina

Insurance policies have their own dictionary, where commonly known words have altogether different meanings.  It is outrageous.  They should be required to write policies in plain English/Spanish whatever. 

Faith, $2,000 a month is a LOT cheaper than $75,000 at once.  Of course, you'd probably still have a deductible/co-pay.  Hopefully, insurance makes it affordable for you. 

@REM.1126  ...  The bulk sum is in our retirement portfolio.  2k/mo would come out of our monthly household income. Neither is an equitable solution as it has detrimental impacts.

Have you looked into different insurance companies or other funding sources? I did a Google search, once upon a time, and there was an insurance company (Minnesota, I think) that covers surgery and other care. Granted your premiums would be out of pocket, but certainly less than $2k/month. I also found various organizations that offer grants and loans specifically for surgeries. I don't know what it takes to qualify but sources are available. Don't lose hope (have Faith!)  ;D

Since this is a self-funded plan and the insurance company is only acting as a plan administrator, is there a chance to reach out to your HR department and start discussions about including trans health care?

Quote from: Iztaccihuatl on March 07, 2024, 10:01:22 AMSince this is a self-funded plan and the insurance company is only acting as a plan administrator, is there a chance to reach out to your HR department and start discussions about including trans health care?

Nope. HR is the biggest bigot & gossip in the building. I'd walk toward a plague before heading in her direction.

I reached out to our new GM. I've known him for years. Real new, as in, less than a week. Whether he has influence over it or it's a decision made by the owner remains to be seen.  At this point, I have no hopeful feelings left.  I expect to be stuck this way and, since I live in Florida, I fully expect to end up arrested at some point and incarcerated just for being me.

Beware of the bathroom police, Faith. 
Keep the ...ahh, Faith??
Hang in there girl.
Hugs Gina

Quote from: Faith on March 07, 2024, 10:18:04 AMAt this point, I have no hopeful feelings left.  I expect to be stuck this way and, since I live in Florida, I fully expect to end up arrested at some point and incarcerated just for being me.

I just want to say that didn't fall on deaf ears. I don't have answers, just tears and profound sadness.


~Jenn

Quote from: Faith on March 07, 2024, 10:18:04 AMI expect to be stuck this way and, since I live in Florida, I fully expect to end up arrested at some point and incarcerated just for being me.

Faith, I am sorry that you are facing these obstacles.  I hope it doesn't get that bad.  Stay strong.

I mean this in the most supportive way, I don't think there is a great chance of you being arrested for being you.  Are you "out"?  If you don't come out, unless you are breaking into cars or robbing liquor stores, your odds of being arrested (even in Florida), are low. 

I am thinking that you are just frustrated and worst case thinking.  I do that a lot, so, I think I recognize it.  To satisfy my curiosity, what do you anticipate you might be arrested for?  Are you in the closet?  You said you hadn't told HR, so I assume you aren't out at work.  Do you go out dressed appropriately for your gender?  Or, always presenting as people expect you to?

Quote from: REM.1126 on March 08, 2024, 11:56:29 AMI mean this in the most supportive way, I don't think there is a great chance of you being arrested for being you.  Are you "out"?  If you don't come out, unless you are breaking into cars or robbing liquor stores, your odds of being arrested (even in Florida), are low. 

I am thinking that you are just frustrated and worst case thinking.  I do that a lot, so, I think I recognize it.  To satisfy my curiosity, what do you anticipate you might be arrested for?  Are you in the closet?  You said you hadn't told HR, so I assume you aren't out at work.  Do you go out dressed appropriately for your gender?  Or, always presenting as people expect you to?

The problem isn't "is it likely"; the problem is "is it possible". When you have to worry what places you are legal in, you have lost significant freedom.

@REM.1126

If I am asked to leave the ladies room and refuse, I can be arrested.  No matter the IDs I have, they can look up historical reference to see the name and gender/sex marker changes. Everything has been updated, including my birth cert.  Surgery is my last step.

I've been out, full time, for over 6 years. public, work, home  ....

no, I am not closeted, never was, never will be (except when I was to myself, does that count?)
I am also not stealth, too many people know me from before. I don't advertise it to new people, that's all.

I did not say I hadn't told HR  .. of course they know .. I said that she is the biggest bigot in the building and I will not go to talk with her. Everyone, literally everyone, at work knows I am trans. I've worked here 15 years and transitioned ~6 years ago.

I don't own any "men's clothes" I don't even own any that look like men's clothes. To clarify, I mean "men's" in the sense of what most people expect.  Present as they expect?  If I did that I'd be wearing old grandma flowery prints and crap like that, no thanks.  If that's what you (not you specifically, you in general) like, that's great, it's not me.

If attaching works, you'll see two different legs down photos and one top - different days and times though.

legs-1.jpg legs-2.jpg top.jpg

It's not easy getting a full length shot

I think you are beautiful, and you dress appropriately. Your make-up is not "over the top". If I saw you on the street looking as I see you in the photos, I would never guess you are trans. If they don't know you and you don't tell them, I doubt they would even be able to guess.
90% of the things we worry about never happen. Just be yourself. I know it is difficult when people know us from before (especially seeing them every day at work). One of the reasons I moved away from friends and family was to get a fresh start. Not everyone can do that, I know. I feel for ya.

Hugs!

Lori

Thing is, as I've posted, I've already been confronted and threatened about using the ladies room .. this is at a place I've been frequenting for years and also while I was wearing a nice dancing dress and while dancing with two other women.

It can happen, it has happened, it can get worse.

I am so sorry to hear that.
The psychologist who did my initial diagnosis commented, "It should never be difficult for someone to just be themselves." It sucks that there are so many small-minded people in our society.

Hugs!

Quote from: Jenn104 on March 08, 2024, 12:23:40 PMThe problem isn't "is it likely"; the problem is "is it possible". When you have to worry what places you are legal in, you have lost significant freedom.

The list of highly improbable things that are possible is approaching the infinite.  If you are going to fret over everything bad that could possibly happen, without regard to probability, we could be forced to endure almost anything.  You could possibly lobotomize 99% of the population and use computer implants to control them like bio-robots using the next generation of neurolink.  It isn't very likely.

Quote from: Faith on March 08, 2024, 12:29:56 PM@REM.1126

If I am asked to leave the ladies room and refuse, I can be arrested.  No matter the IDs I have, they can look up historical reference to see the name and gender/sex marker changes. Everything has been updated, including my birth cert.  Surgery is my last step.

I've been out, full time, for over 6 years. public, work, home  ....

no, I am not closeted, never was, never will be (except when I was to myself, does that count?)
I am also not stealth, too many people know me from before. I don't advertise it to new people, that's all.

I did not say I hadn't told HR  .. of course they know .. I said that she is the biggest bigot in the building and I will not go to talk with her. Everyone, literally everyone, at work knows I am trans. I've worked here 15 years and transitioned ~6 years ago.

I don't own any "men's clothes" I don't even own any that look like men's clothes. To clarify, I mean "men's" in the sense of what most people expect.  Present as they expect?  If I did that I'd be wearing old grandma flowery prints and crap like that, no thanks.  If that's what you (not you specifically, you in general) like, that's great, it's not me.

If attaching works, you'll see two different legs down photos and one top - different days and times though.

legs-1.jpg legs-2.jpg top.jpg

It's not easy getting a full length shot

That is a reasonable concern.  I didn't realize that you had transitioned completely and were only forgoing GRS.  I understand your concern now. 

Quote from: REM.1126 on March 09, 2024, 01:02:05 PMThe list of highly improbable things that are possible is approaching the infinite.  If you are going to fret over everything bad that could possibly happen, without regard to probability, we could be forced to endure almost anything.  You could possibly lobotomize 99% of the population and use computer implants to control them like bio-robots using the next generation of neurolink.  It isn't very likely.

I don't feel my sense of probabilities is misplaced.

If you could be thrown in jail for a year, for going five miles over the speed limit, would it change your driving habits? Maybe you'd think going 40 in a 35 wasn't worth it, even if the probability of getting caught was small. How about one mile an hour over? Think about an everyday thing you do suddenly having an artificial restriction with a penalty out of proportion.

Bathrooms are about gender, not about sex. Everyone has a right, in my opinion, to go in a gender aligned space and not be afraid that if they are clocked they are liable to arrest. How likely one is to be arrested is completely irrelevant. Passing and the bathroom are disconnected. Laws resticting bathroom use are designed to strip us of dignity as well as curtail our right to exist in public.

"how likely" has no place in vigorously definding our rights.

~Jenn

The question "how likely" isn't irrelevant in defending rights, but it also isn't primary.  I agree that one should defend all their rights to their utmost ability.  We all choose our battles, and in a world of limited resources, triage is wise.  Therefore, a highly improbable infringement is not as relevant as an entirely likely infringement.

But, I was never suggesting that anyone "not defend their rights because punishment was improbable.  I was suggesting that she if the probability of harm is low, that she would be wise not to spend a lot of energy worrying about it. 

But, Faith has brought information to my attention that makes it probable enough that she might suffer harm.  Therefore, I was mistaken in my belief that she wouldn't likely suffer harm.  As I said above, I now understand her concern. 

Should my understanding matter to anyone else?  Maybe not.  But, I do appreciate having information that she based her concerns on brought to my attention.  It helped me understand her concerns.

I think we can let that direction of topic drop. Assumptions can and will be made when dealing with text discourse. As long as clarification is made and accepted, it's time to move on.

Nobody's scenario is the same, their safety and security issues differ wildly. Let's accept the fact that if someone feels threatened or unsafe, there is probably a good reason for it without having to get details.

I am investigating going to Canada for surgery. GrS Montréal.

Contact is in early process, however, they did respond quickly with all information required, packets to fill out, and they gave a price up front.

** crossing fingers **

Good for you. I hope all works out. Good luck with the GRS paperwork.
Hugs Gina

Shifting away from my other topic.

Had band practice last night. I've been struggling with playing, severe wrist pain in both hands. Neck and shoulder pain as well. It made playing properly very difficult. On top of that, I'm trying to put songs together to sing. I've been stuck at two songs for a while now. Not that I can't sing, its that I have difficulty singing in front of friends and family, on stage is not an issue. But, you can't sing it on stage if the band can't rehearse it.

Last night I played well, minimal stiffness and pain and picked up two more songs.  "Proud Mary" (meh song overall but people like it) and "It's Only Make Believe" (Conway Twitty version). I really like that one and I shocked the guys by doing it. Guitar player was like, "You won't hear this often but .. you'll need to back off the mic when you sing that, you're too loud".  It's true, I talk and sing very soft. But not that song.

I might actually look forward to Saturday's show.

Proud Mary is my fav song to tambourine to, you get a proper workout!! Debbie Parry band do a great Tina Turner version .

Quote from: davina61 on March 21, 2024, 04:42:37 AMProud Mary is my fav song to tambourine to, you get a proper workout!! Debbie Parry band do a great Tina Turner version .

Yup, like I said, people like the song. It's a bit 'meh' to play on bass that's all. There are other songs I can get into better, really get into the groove. Some songs I just get lost in .. not lost as in play wrong 😋

This past few days we've had a young guy and his FiL working on a bathroom remodel. While I was gone to rehearsal the young guy asked Lori my pronouns to avoid being disrespectful. He wasn't sure if I was MtF or FtM and didn't wnat to offend.

On the plus side .. respect. On the minus side .. Obviously trans.  I'm not really surprised. But, hey, androgynous looking is a thing, right?

Quote from: Faith on March 21, 2024, 11:32:59 AMThis past few days we've had a young guy and his FiL working on a bathroom remodel. While I was gone to rehearsal the young guy asked Lori my pronouns to avoid being disrespectful. He wasn't sure if I was MtF or FtM and didn't wnat to offend.

On the plus side .. respect. On the minus side .. Obviously trans.  I'm not really surprised. But, hey, androgynous looking is a thing, right?

Faith,

It is definitely a thing. Hugs
Mariah

One thing I forgot to say was the DP band slip  the riff from Deep Purples Black Night into Proud Mary in the middle break, try it as it fits!!

Local courthouse had a free passport photo day today. Lori and I just left after processing our passport applications.

One more thing done towards a trip to Canada.

Played the show last night. I give thanks to pedialyte and manuka honey lozenges for getting me through. Nervousness showed, I always get nervous on new songs. But, I pulled it off. "It's Only Make Believe" was a hit and filled the dance floor.. WooHoo

Oh, here's a weird one.  Usually women will come up asking about my hair. Last night one tapped my shoulder, I turned and she said, "I need to ask ..."  and I'm expecting hair and was ready to answer, nope. She asked how I get my skin so smooth  😱

I told her Dove moisturizing soap, liquid & warm water, not hot. But I also forgot to tell her that I use After Sun Aloe gel every day. I stii shave and it a great shaving cream 😊😋

lethargic depression day. I can't seem to focus at all. zero ability to concentrate. Typically I'd bury myself in a book, except that's not working either. It's going to be a long day.

I have submitted all requisite & signed papers to GrS Montréal. The response was semi-positive. The papers were accepted, 6-9 months to validate and process 😱  Time to wait ... again ... some more .. *sigh*

Who ever said patience is a virtue never tried to transition, it will come dear when its the right time.   

I can't braid my own hair, I can barely braid someone else's. I saw a vid using hair-ties to create a faux braid that looks nice. I ended up not doing that yet kept the multiple hair-tie look.  It came out rather interesting yesterday.

20240328_073714.jpg  20240328_105408.jpg

**we won't discuss the flyaways. My hair still breaks easily as I haven't found the solution yet.

I love that look! Thanks for sharing. I think it's a great idea.
I also followed something you posted earlier about using After Sun Aloe Gel as shaving cream. That works the best of all I have tried so far.

Hugs!

Quote from: LoriDee on March 29, 2024, 10:09:39 AMI love that look! Thanks for sharing. I think it's a great idea.
I also followed something you posted earlier about using After Sun Aloe Gel as shaving cream. That works the best of all I have tried so far.

Hugs!

Thanks. I'm glad that something I said actually helped someone or was found useful  :)

That's what this place is all about... sharing experiences to help others. Hugs!

Long weekend. We got one bathroom redone last week  .. expensive but, oh well. That led to replacing the water softener system which I did this weekend, plus cleaning out the shed of old crap. Next step is likely our water heater. It's the original with the home, 34 years of cooking water. We're considering an on-demand.

Nice weather with the grandkids so I'm braving the backyard 😎  :o

20240407_125609.jpg

Gorgeous as ever Faith!

Enjoy your weather. We got rain/sleet/snow mix. Ah, Spring in the Black Hills of South Dakota.

Hugs!

oddest thing. Hurricane IAN did damage to our house and attachments. Nothing serious compared to others but enough to hurt the wallet - we received a $5 check, which I refuse to process. Well, it appears that our insurance carrier at the time went insolvent and FIGA is looking into resolutions. As it's considered confidential I'll not expound on it further other than, at least it looks like we'll get a bit more than $5 to close it out.

one more milestone, as far as paperwork is concerned. Our passports came in  :)

Yay! Milestones should always be celebrated. Congrats!