Hi, I'm Fade. I found Susan's Place probably over two years ago at this point and been reading when I can, but never created an account until this point. I'm an MTF teen, pre-HRT, and basically pre-everything except a few elements of social transition. I'm just starting to come out of the closet by telling more of my family and openly being myself.
I've been confused and questioning my gender ever since about age 5 or so, but still went ahead and did the traditional boy things, keeping my true feelings bottled up inside. I got bullied in school when I was 10 and 11 a lot, and that was a dark time for me where it was the first time I felt truly hopeless and alone. My parents split up a couple years after that.
I came out to my divorced parents October 2017, it being a painful experience. While I was going for a walk late at night, I told my father over a phone call in complete tears that I was unhappy with my gender. At first I thought he understood even in his complete lack of words. I came out to my Mom the next day or so. While she didn't understand what I was going through and didn't like it, she still promised me her unconditional love. After that, my relationship with my Dad went rock bottom and it hasn't moved too much. He's said hurtful things to me and has hit me on occasion, but that, luckily, has not happened for a couple months now. And since I live with him half the time, my dad is still trying to get me to be his idealized masculine son. On the other hand, my mom and I have had rocky times over the years, but she let's me be myself at most times.
I've been going to therapy (mostly for depression, but I'm trying to address gender dysphoria too) for a little over a year now. As I've said, I'm starting to make something of a slow social transition, so I wear makeup and girly things whenever I can. In the end, I'm looking for help, support, and solidarity from people on this site. Love you all.
--Fade
@Fade Dear Fade: I am so very glad that you have come out of the
LURKER ZONE and become a member here and that you found the Susan's Place Forums... and I am so happy that you found the
Youth Forums and the
Youth Introductions Forum to tell us more about yourself.
As you continue to post on the forums you will be able to exchange thoughts and comments with others that are experiencing many of the same things that you are. I expect that you will be getting many members offering their thoughts and suggestions as you continue to post here.
This is the right place for you to be to find out what others may have to say that may have been in your circumstances and with your questions and concerns.
There are a lot of members here that will be able to identify with your situation and as you continue to feel free to share with all of us.
I also want to warmly
WELCOME you to Susan's Place.
You will find this a safe and friendly place to share with others and to read about others similar trials, tribulations, and successes.
As you are certainly aware you can share with others and involve yourself with some give and take with other like-minded members. When frustrated or if you have successes you can share it here if you wish and receive support from others
and offer support to others. ....
***There is a very good chance that you might find that you will
make some new like-minded friends here.
Please come in and continue to be involved at your own pace.
I have attached important and informative
LINKS that will help you to navigate around the Forums and will allow you to enjoy the features here.
Please look closely at the
LINKS in RED, answers are there to many questions that new members ask.
Again, Welcome to Susan's Place.
DanielleHere are some links to the site rules and stuff that all new members should be familiar with: Things that you should read
Site Terms of Service & Rules to Live By (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html) | Standard Terms & Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html) | Post Ranks (including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.) | Cautionary Note (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,82221.0.html) |
Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html) | News posting & quoting guidelines (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,174951.0.html) | Photo, avatars, & signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866) | Membership Agreement (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,216851.0.html) |
Hi Fade
Welcome to Susan's, Hope you enjoy your time here :icon_wave-nerd:
There are lots of great people with valuable experiences and only to happy to share them with you.
Take care ;D
LizK