Pam is still in there. However now there is Rose (not her real name, she is from Texas and in NYC). I will be going on a date with her on the 26 through 28th. She really has my interest and I am totally infatuated with her. I never felt this with a guy.
So I think I figured out my sexuality. It took me a while
I stopped going to parties a while ago and I absolutely do not miss it. I still have a lot of guys calling and texting me but I am not interested. When Rose and I communicate via text, video and phone I feel tingles, I smile and I have such a feeling of desire and my heart races. Life is so strange. She knows I am trans and have leukemias.
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I have a T-LGLL diagnosis and and the oncologist is waiting for the Aug 13 blood test to see if the clonality increases for the PH+ leukemia. I have the T315I mutation so line 1 and 2 chemo will not work. Which leaves third line chemo. So I really hope the clonality goes down. I feel absolutely awesome and look forward to the gym tomorrow. 2023 and the first part of 2024 was bad health wise but I feel great now.
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I finally have resolved some issues. I forgave myself for not transitioning much younger. Also I know it would have been a very different realty back then. I have resolved in my mind what occurred when I was young. Things will always hurt. Abuse, neglect and sexual abuse; I do not judge them and in my mind it is over. I need to focus on being the best person I can be and leave that baggage out of my life.
God, I was so angry at God. I realize God was not to blame for the above. Why I am trans, mosaic, have TLGLL and PH+ and T315I mutation I do not know but I am over blaming.
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One thing that is really strange, When Penn was doing my bone marrow tissue and liquid genetic testing they found 3 allele's that, until now, was not in there genetic database.
