Hi there folks. I have been perusing this site for a while but never really plucked up the courage to actually post. However I just feel the urge to talk and be open at the moment and I always prefer to open up to strangers rather than those that know me on anything personal.
I am a straight married father of 3. I am not confused at all in terms of sexuality. I am as red blooded straight as they come. Maybe far too red blooded. I am a pretty normal fella obsessed with big boobs and although my wife and I don't have sex as often as I would like (is this not always the case. lol) I am very satisified in terms of my sex life. I am a man. I like being a man and I like sex with women. I like sports, beer, the usual "blokey" things. I suppose I would be considered a typical "man's man."
I am however a secret crossdresser and have been for quite a long time. I am the only one that knows this and have never been anywhere near being caught.
My wife was quite overweight and I have small feet so I was quite lucky in that even though she is a size smaller than me she had to buy a size up all the time because of her wide "flintstone" feet (her description) which meant that I quite often took the opportunity to buy her heels. She probably doesn't know that I have worn some of these more than her. Only indoors though. She has lost a vast amount of weight now so any new shoes are a size down that won;t fit me :( I am not considering anything public though. It is all just for me to enjoy myself. She doesn;t realise why there are so many full length mirrors around this small house. lol
I guess I just love women's bodies and sexy dress. So much so that I love taking the opportunity to dress up in private and wear heels a lot when she is out.
It has even got to the point where I have now bought one of those realistic silicone breast plates off ebay from China and even though it won't arrive for a month or so I can't stop thinking about it coming. Exciting times.
Forgive me for the detailed "hello." I guess I have years of talking pent up in me. My wife is quite open minded to the point that we have done some web camming together as a straight couple years ago. However she isn't as open minded as accepting a cross dressing husband. She does however accept it as just something to cam and make some money although I haven'tdone this yet. I've just been talking to her about it. It passes that way. A job is a job etc.
I'll stop now or this post will go on forever.
Hi Andrea, welcome to Susan's Place! I identified as a crossdresser for a long time, but I eventually figured out that I am genderfluid. See you around the site!
Hugs, Devlyn
Hello Andrea, welcome to Susan's!
Well actually you do have the courage to post ;) because you just did.
I am MtF. Many of the people I have met here are transitioning as I am, or have already transitioned, but we also have an active board called Crossdresser Talk (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/board,23.0.html) and that activity can be a goal in itself. Personally I see nothing wrong with wearing a particular style or gender of clothing, the majority of Fashion Police laws were rescinded years ago.
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Andrea, thank you for joining and for posting. Best wishes on your adventures!
Kendra
Hi Andrea :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's Place :) Glad to have you here, join on in the fun
Hugs
V M
Thanks for the welcome and the replies.
Yes I have looked through the crossdressing section but I've also been looking through the others too. I find the subject matter crosses a lot and while I may be a straight male it isn't all a sexual aspect. I guess I just love how beautiful and sexy women are.
I just love how beautiful women can be and while I have no desire to be a woman I love to "emulate" if that is the right expression.
I know it might be vain and shallow but I love the current female trend where they put on far too much makeup and look like porcelain dolls. I know it is silly and fake but they look so good. I have tried makeup a few times myself and my god these women are absolute artists. lol.
I love being a man though. I just like to have my moments where I can be something else for a short time. Maybe it is an extension of my satisfaction with myself that I like to love myself, he, he.
After all I am not the most "handsome" chap with a (very slim) skinny body, big nose and hair that won't behave but being in my early forties I got over the depression of not being that attractive as public perception sees it years ago and these days am quite happy in my own skin.
Quite the opposite to my wife who was over weight and unhappy and is now normal weight and even unhappier due to the hanging skin. So even if she was open minded to accept "her man" not being an alpha manly male she would most definitely get depressed at me slipping into clothes a size or 2 smaller than she can even after weight loss. I think seeing me fitting into much smaller clothes than her would destroy her. It wouldn't matter if I looked good in them or not, just the fact that I can fit clothes she can only dream of. She was as high as a size 20 at her heaviest and is currently down to a 12 which is a great achievement for her but 12 is baggy on me and I like tight stuff.
I did buy myself some clothes to try a few weeks ago. Nice sexy clothes that were tight fitting but from the charity shop and ended up having to buy smaller so I was fitting into a UK8 in stretchy stuff or UK10 fitted. I guess my manly "no hips" helps in getting into smaller stuff as well.
I have no guilt about hiding stuff though. I just do it as and when. I'm sure she has things she keeps to herself, most people do have something that is their little secret and all my stuff goes in my cupboard. A cupboard that keeps all the things for my work including stock so she doesn't go in there anyway.
Should I feel guilty about keeping secrets? I have read lots of people talk about guilt but I feel none. Not the slightest bit of guilt. I don't "borrow" any of her clothes as they don't fit.
I have just always had since childhood a weak spot for heels and boobs which went away in my twenties but returned once I got over not being the "handsome" guy all the girls wanted.
Maybe I just emulate what I wish "my woman" through these years would wear all the time but then I am not so selfish to insist she wears heels and tight stuff all the time so maybe I do it instead? I am to blame for her being really into nails though. I love nice nails and I bought her some as a gift a few years back. I didn't know she was going to go mad for nails from then on but I'm not complaining.
I have to admit I do buy clothes and wear heels that emulate what I find sexy myself. It's more a seeing myself in the mirror so maybe I am actually presenting myself in the place of something I can't have?
The desire to do this also drifts in and out. I can be taking every opportunity for a few weeks and then not be interested in doing it for a few months. It comes and goes.