Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Significant Others talk => Topic started by: sazi on May 29, 2005, 02:24:25 AM

Title: New at this
Post by: sazi on May 29, 2005, 02:24:25 AM
Hi!  I'm new to this site.  My SO introduced me to it.  I have read the other entries here and find it all very interesting.  My SO is the first person that I have known or had a relationship with who is intersexed.  I have always consider myself to be a heterosexual female. Even though there maybe parts of him that is female like he is all male to me.  Honestly, I don't care if he is an ape, I love him with all my heart and soul.  I have been married before and have beautiful children. Never have I had a relationship that I has taught me so much.  Not only has he taught me that everything is NOT black and white, but he has also taught me that love IS as wonderful as they make it seem in the movies!!!  :)  I'm honestly ashamed of how I have felt about people who have gender issues.  I guess I should say I am ashamed of how I HAVEN'T thought about them.  I had my ignorant opinon and didn't give it much thought other than that.  I've always heard that "they" didn't choose to be this way.  Not until I met my SO did I realize that "they" were individuals just as I was who DIDN'T just choose to be this way!  That it is truely a part of them.  ANYWAY.... I could go on for hours... **laughs** I just wanted to see if there was any others out there who are the partners of intersexed or transgender partners who wanted to chat.  I would love to get to know you and hear your stories.  I also would love to get to know others here at this site and welcome all who want to respond.  I'm sure I'll go on about things on here again....I'm one of those women who love to talk.  :D Thanks for taken the time to read this...hope to chat with yall soon!! 

Sazi

*edit was swapping a misplaced letter back :)
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: 4years on May 29, 2005, 03:51:40 AM
Hello Sazi, welcome to Susan's most wonderful place! (=

This is quite a nice place indeed, I'm glad your SO pointed you in this direction!

I am not a SO, but I don't like not saying Hello (=
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: Dennis on May 29, 2005, 02:02:22 PM
Sazi, get  yer guy on here - I'm the only FtM at the moment!

He's a lucky guy and there's no need to feel ashamed of the way you have felt in the past. You've clearly progressed light years from there.

Dennis
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: sazi on May 29, 2005, 05:08:13 PM
 Hi 4years... thanks for saying Hi!! I do think this is a very nice place!!  Hope all is well with you!  Talk to you soon! 

Sazi :)
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: sazi on May 29, 2005, 05:23:50 PM
 Hi Dennis!!!  :) He has a new ID on here... he will be posting a message soon!  I know he would like to talk to you...I will make sure that he sends ya a message!!  Do you have a SO? How is the transition going for you? How are your family and friends handling it? **laughs** Told yall I talk alot! 

Thanks for saying that about me being ashamed.  I have come along way from the way I use to think.  I was born and raised in the south.  Even though people from the south are very polite and the hospitality is something that we are known for...I know that there are negitive things that we known for also.  Being afraid to learn new things or thinking that if it doesn't concern us then we won't worry about it is something that is an awful reality.  I've decided to make it my mission to educate people on these issues!!!  It breaks my heart now to think of how they are treated.  And how ignorant people can really be!!!

You know...I don't know about anyone else..but I see that with my SO...it is his family that treats him the worse.  I know that he was surprised that after he told me I told him it didn't matter.. that I still loved him!! And I still wanted to be with him! It hurts me to see how his family treats him!  I want to scream at them.. HE IS STILL THE SAME PERSON THAT ALL OF YOU COUNTED ON TO DO EVERYTHING FOR YOU BEFORE!!!!!!! HE STILL HAS THE SAME HEART AND SOUL!!!!  Sorry.. I get really emotional when it comes to stuff like this... *laughs*  ANYWAYS.... Can't wait to talk to you some more...and I will tell him to get his butt on here!!!   **laughs**

HUGS!!!
Sazi
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: Dennis on May 30, 2005, 01:54:36 PM
QuoteDo you have a SO? How is the transition going for you? How are your family and friends handling it?

My partner dumped me within 15 minutes of my telling her I was seeing a therapist about gender issues and possible transitioning and then refused to spend another night in the same house as me. Painful at the time, but it was for the best, as transitioning with a partner who is not 100% supportive would be less than ideal.

Transition is going fine, albeit slowly. My endo has me on 75 mg/two weeks injectible, which is a low dose. I can't remember how old I was when a doctor first said 'at your age' to me, but my endo says a gradual increase in dosage is best for a guy of my age. And so I grind my teeth impatiently and succumb to sound medical principles.

My friends are fantastic and supportive, as is my workplace. My mother is coming around. She is the only family member I have in Canada, as we are immigrants from the UK and my father passed away a couple of years ago. Mum has progressed from a stunned silence with occasional tactless comments, to a state of quasi-acceptance and willingness to learn.

Dennis
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: sazi on May 30, 2005, 03:59:38 PM
I'm sry to hear that about your partner...but you are right it is better.  A realtionship is hard anyway...adding things to it makes it harder.  You really need and deserve some to give you 100% support!! I'm glad to hear that about your friends and family!!  And I am happy that your mom is coming around.  I know it is hard for some and even though I would love to scream GET A GRIP!!! I know that they need time to adjust too.  I know that not all are as understanding as others. 

I know the dr. situation is frustrating...lol my man's is the same way.  He is about to increase his dose...so we are getting ready for that.  The side affects I've read about and heard from others are not bad at all.  Some are very good.. **laughs** **blushes**  How old are you anyway??

Hope you have a wonderful Memorial Day!!!!

Hugssssssss
Sazi
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: Dennis on May 30, 2005, 06:32:29 PM
I'm 42. And yeah, some of the side effects can be very beneficial to a partner *wink* I'm just noticing the increase in, er, interest in the opposite sex. I figure on being a 43 year old teenager soon (birthday in July).

Dennis
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: sazi on May 30, 2005, 07:02:09 PM
Happy early birthday!!!  And yeah..I'm kinda looking forward to the side effects benifits... **laughs**  Have you tried dating? If so how is that working out?  Do you have instant messenger of any kind? Would love to chat with you!  My yahoo is missy_sazi2005 if ya wanna add me! 

Sazi
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: Bailey on June 01, 2005, 03:21:42 AM
Hello Sazi,  I too am new to this.  Recently my partner RoseDawson (member of this site) has  began talking with and sharing with me her feelings about who she is and how she feels.  I hope to learn more and find more people that are in the same situation as I am to share experiances with. I am not always the most talkative but please feel free to message me anytime about anything.

Thanks
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: Rose Dawson on June 01, 2005, 03:40:28 AM
Sazi - As you can see from my partner's post above, having someone who wants to understand you, has the magnificent power to lighten a very heavy burden.

As I've said in another post on here, having the support and comfort of (a) loved one(s) can make or break one's transition. Because you have offered your unconditional love to your partner, you've only begun to see what a wonderful person this has made you both.

With much love and suport,
Rose
Title: Re: New at this
Post by: sazi on June 09, 2005, 01:45:24 PM
Hi Bailey...Hi Rose Dawn.... so very nice to meet yall!!!! Sorry it took me a little while to get back to you...been busy here. I'm glad to meet someone who is in the same situation as I am, Bailey.  I would love to chat with you about the experiences that yall have had..are having..and will have.  The thing that impresses me the most about this site is the support here.  I am greatful for it and very excited about being able to contribute!! And you know Rose Dawn...I'm sure that Bailey feels the same way...but my SO (Cowboy) is my rock!!  Life deals us all things that we know without the support of a loved one...we would crumble!  To me...it is not a big deal to support and love my partner!  It comes natural...I love him with every fiber of me and I do want to know EVERYTHING about him!  **Laughs** If he is quiet more than 5 seconds I am always asking him..."What ya thinking?"  I am recently dealing with some personal issues and I know without a shadow of a doubt that I could not make it without him!  I would fall apart if I didn't have him to hold me up!!!  I've been married before to a "straight" man and had a "normal" relationship.  But never could I count on him for emotional support...hell support period! I would have to go to someone else in my family...which is ok...but that is what your partner is suppose to be there for you for!!  I hate this term...but it is true... that is suppose to be their job.  The only thing I have ever wanted in a relationship is for someone to love me as much as I love them....and I have finally found that!!  To me...all of his "specialness" **laughs** I know that is not a word... ANYWAY... they are just bonus blessings for me!!! It's funny how he thinks he is the lucky one....if he only seen what I see!!! 
SOOOOOOOOO..... **laughs** sorry I get carried away sometimes...  :D  How long have you two been together??  Where ya from??  How does your family and friends handle the situation?? Do either of you have children and if so how is that going??  Think that is enough questions for now... **laughs** Hope to talk to yall later!!!

HUGSSSSS
Sazi