Just wondering....
IMO, yes it is needed. The aim of therapy is (or should be) guidance. I'm afraid that without the appropriate advice, we'd be all over the place, doing things we are not supposed to do and avoiding the things that we are.
tink :icon_chick:
Well.... um.... how much does therapy cost?
Quote from: Natal on November 23, 2007, 07:05:35 PM
Well.... um.... how much does therapy cost?
It varies greatly some people charge on a sliding scale and some do not. Luckily, my therapist charges on a sliding scale (which is a good thing since his normal fee is around $120 an hour).
Ouch ..... 120 dollars X 3.8 = 456 Ringgit.... (Woah weird price.) I am gonna go bankcrupt.
I believe that therapy is a necessary part of transition. One should not start HRT without a recommendation from a therapist. I don't know what is available from the health system where you live so don't let the prices mentioned here put you off.
Wishing you the best,
Wing Walker
I'm really glad I had therapy, though I was less than pleased at the beginning. And mine was free.
How did you get it free? Comes with a Happy Meal?
What do they do at therapy? what happens? and what is achieved?
In the U.K we have Gender Identity psychiatrists who try and trip you up and try to humiliate you. They are agressive and question your every move. There isn't the kind of support you might get in the U.S. and the word 'therapy' doesn't exist in the U.K ....
I think it depends on the patient. I think you could reasonably say there are some stable, sane, resourceful individuals out there who could navigate their way through the process without a therapist, and who actually might be harmed by one.
BUT, I think those people are few and far between. And even if you have your head screwed on straight regarding the gender issues (as if anyone could tell you if you do or don't), who among us doesn't have other areas of our life that need some working on. At the very least, it's nice to be able to have a caring individual to drop in on and say "you know, life is really really hard sometimes. I got read at the supermarket the other day and it just threw my entire day off..."
Suzie
Quote from: Natal on November 24, 2007, 12:24:27 AM
How did you get it free? Comes with a Happy Meal?
I also received therapy free of charge. It was covered by my health insurance from work. It still is; I only have to pay $10 for every one hour session now up to 24 sessions a year. If I have more therapy than that, then it is expensive, $140 per hour with my therapist.
tink :icon_chick:
Quote from: Tink on November 24, 2007, 02:30:08 PM
Quote from: Natal on November 24, 2007, 12:24:27 AM
How did you get it free? Comes with a Happy Meal?
I also received therapy free of charge. It was covered by my health insurance from work. It still is; I only have to pay $10 for every one hour session now up to 24 sessions a year. If I have more therapy than that, then it is expensive, $140 per hour with my therapist.
tink :icon_chick:
I could pay five bucks and see a therapist through my insurance but the therapist that I was assigned to took one look at me and said. "I only have a limited amount of time." That said to me that he shouldnt be a therapist, let alone mine. So I have decided to look elsewhere for a therapist.
Quote from: Berliegh on November 24, 2007, 08:30:16 AMIn the U.K we have Gender Identity psychiatrists who try and trip you up and try to humiliate you. They are agressive and question your every move.
Sounds exactly like the shrink the U.S. government sicced on me.
I think it depends on the kind of person you are. Clearly, it's possible to transition without therapy. Lots of people have. At the same time, the people who did did so because they were headstrong or because they couldn't find one/lack of funds. I think if you know yourself and are willing to accept responsibility for your actions, therapy may not be necessary. However, there are a lot of transgender people out there with serious comorbid issues who really really need therapy, and there are others who just get what they can from it. I don't see a therapist since I have no insurance, though this may change once I'm a full time Master's student in January. So, in short, some need it, some don't.
I couldn't do this without therapy. my sessions run 90 min. long and cost me $75.00 each time, worth every penny in my opinion.
I'm still not the biggest fan of therapy, but I mean, there are times when it helps. Really the most needed thing I think is a great friend who will listen to whatever you will say and just give some help if needed.
The main purpose of my therapy is mainly just like venting and the how to approach this type of stuff, now that I got the HRT letter a little while ago. But it's just way too expensive at times since my parents don't want me to run it by insurance because they don't want to. Luckily, they pay for it most of the time.
Here's my question again, What do they do at therapy? what happens? and what is achieved?
berliegh... its like your shirinks but they are private practices, and being private charge pretty much how they want, and since theres other options if theyre not what you want or need you can change they tend to cater to you. most in my experiance with other issuse have been kind and understanding asking thought provoking questions. their whole point to me seems to be to help you cope with your 'issues' by asking questions and makeing you think about them
though there are bad ones they seem not as prevelant as in your nhs<?>.
and we cna change them at any time if we feel the need our gov't doesnt tell use you have to see this one b/c your post code is xxxxx. theres very likey 3 or more in most towns and many more in our larger citys.
althought this is either coverd by private insurance or totally out of pocket.
i hope this helped.
Quote from: genovais on November 24, 2007, 03:42:03 PM
I think it depends on the kind of person you are. Clearly, it's possible to transition without therapy. Lots of people have.
Perhaps, but if you need hormones, letters of recommendation, approval for SRS, you DO need to see a therapist who is familiar with the SOC; otherwise, no reputable doctor will adhere to your needs without a therapist authorization.
tink :icon_chick:
Therapy is very good. I didn't start out in therapy for my GID but rather for my suicidal tendacies. That led to my GID problem. I went for over 4 years, started out once a week then once a month for the remainder of the time and I went back just before my GRS date. Mine was 90 for 45 minutes. I had insurance and paid a co pay. I don't remember what that was. Pat paid it. I had a nervous break down and tried to kill myself. It all led to my GID, but I was on Paxil for a while and it didn't work that well. When we started discussing TS'ism and I got my hormones, my anxiety went down and I was better. This was my treatment. It's not for everyone.
Sheila
In a word YES.
kim
Quote from: Natal on November 24, 2007, 12:24:27 AM
How did you get it free? Comes with a Happy Meal?
I went to a counseling center near me (hour and a half by bus) for LGBT folk. They took insurance, and worked on a sliding scale for those without a lot of money. In my case, the sliding scale equated to 'no fee.'
Quote from: Berliegh on November 24, 2007, 08:30:16 AM
What do they do at therapy? what happens? and what is achieved?
In the U.K we have Gender Identity psychiatrists who try and trip you up and try to humiliate you. They are agressive and question your every move. There isn't the kind of support you might get in the U.S. and the word 'therapy' doesn't exist in the U.K ....
I dont know what you are talking about Berleigh!
My psych is from the UK and she is the most wonderful person ever!
She did ask me a lot of questions at first. But everything was above board and I could never have started HRT without her!
So Im really thankful to the UK for providing her for me here in Tasmania as Gender Psychs are hard to come by here and she had the expeirence of 12 years practicing behind her. So she was really helpful!
I just wish she was still here. Shes gone now.... :'(
if you're ts and need to transition your body, therapy is imperative.
Quote from: emma? on November 25, 2007, 06:58:54 AM
berliegh... its like your shirinks but they are private practices, and being private charge pretty much how they want, and since theres other options if theyre not what you want or need you can change they tend to cater to you. most in my experiance with other issuse have been kind and understanding asking thought provoking questions. their whole point to me seems to be to help you cope with your 'issues' by asking questions and makeing you think about them
though there are bad ones they seem not as prevelant as in your nhs<?>.
and we cna change them at any time if we feel the need our gov't doesnt tell use you have to see this one b/c your post code is xxxxx. theres very likey 3 or more in most towns and many more in our larger citys.
althought this is either coverd by private insurance or totally out of pocket.
i hope this helped.
It's true, the psychiatrists withing the U.K NHS system use 'bully boy' tactics towards patients and make them feel completely worthless. One Charing Cross NHS Psychiatrist admitted he didn't believe in gender Dysphoria existed at all.
I recieved an e-mail this morning from a patient I know who is still attendinding Charing Cross GIC in London and she is depressed at the way they have been treating her and she has already slit her wrists once before. I'm indirectly working as a help line for people atending that awful place and I have been tarketing U.K Govenment politicians and other govenment bodies to do something about changing the U.K Gender clinic system and psychiatric attitude the medical profession has towards people suffering from Gender Dysporia in the U.K
Posted on: November 26, 2007, 03:10:49 AM
Quote from: Kirstie on November 25, 2007, 08:00:18 PM
I dont know what you are talking about Berleigh!
My psych is from the UK and she is the most wonderful person ever!
She did ask me a lot of questions at first. But everything was above board and I could never have started HRT without her!
So Im really thankful to the UK for providing her for me here in Tasmania as Gender Psychs are hard to come by here and she had the expeirence of 12 years practicing behind her. So she was really helpful!
I just wish she was still here. Shes gone now.... :'(
What part of the country do you live in Kirstie and who have you seen within the U.K NHS system? Psychiatrists do vary depending on what part of the country you live in. 'The lottery system' is something that's real and happening and if you live in London or the south it's much worse that if you live in Scotland or the north.
Quote from: Berliegh on November 25, 2007, 03:47:22 AM
Here's my question again, What do they do at therapy? what happens? and what is achieved?
I am in the US. I have seen 3 therapists on the way to getting my surgery letters and all of them were helpful.
For all therapists the first couple of sessions are spent getting to know each other and your styles of talking, telling your history and why you are there. They always ask about alcohol/drug usage, home life and situation, social life, and work situation.
My first was a psychologist with no gender identity experience. I wasn't having any luck finding one that would be able to provide me with HRT/surgery letters but I still wanted to work on the anxiety and depression that were holding up my transition and hopefully find a referral to someone who would have the training/experience to write HRT/surgery letters. At the first session he asked me why I was there, what I wanted to achieve, and how he and I would know when we were done. I wanted to get control of my anxieties and fears that triggered depression and were blocking my transition. I was too depressed to have any social life at all and too afraid of people to try presenting in public as female. He explained his style as CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) and EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing). CBT focuses on modifying your behavioral responses. At each session we started by me bringing up any new or past events or issues in my life or whatever I wanted to talk about. He might question me further about those things and offer ideas or exercises toward improving my handling of events and my emotions. That would lead to the second part of the session where he would take something I had talked about such as some depressive trigger and have me to focus exclusively on that. He asked me to follow his hand with my eyes as he moved it from left to right. I was to try to relive the moment in my mind and to re-experience the thoughts and feelings I had at the time. After a minute or so he would stop and I would describe what I experienced and any other thoughts that it triggered. We would talk about that a bit then he would pick another event and repeat it for that. For the last one of the day he would ask me for a positive event or time when I felt especially good and do the eye movement thing for that so that I always left feeling good. We did progress to the point where I was presenting as female at our sessions and beginning to go out socially. At that time his office was able to get me a referral to someone who had GID training and experience.
My second therapist was a Masters degree social worker/therapist with gender identity experience qualified to provide letters for HRT and surgery. He provided a letter for hormone therapy after 3 months and the first letter for surgery after 1 year RLT. We started out with weekly sessions, then monthly during most of my RLT, and every two weeks toward the end of RLT and approaching surgery. Each session is begun by me talking about what is new in my life since the prior session. I talk about my progress in transition or what is happening at home, work and social life. I might talk about my attempts to improve my appearance and presentation. I describe how people are relating to me and reacting to my transition and how I would handle that. The therapist gives me ideas about how to improve if needed. I sometimes bring pictures of myself with friends in social activities. I always volunteered (without waiting to be asked) as much information and evidence as I could to show that my transition was working and making my life better. We sometimes talk about the political/legal issues relating to transsexuals or how we are treated in the medical/mental health professions. We occasionally trade information on resources for transition. The sessions are always enjoyable. I get insights to myself and suggestions on further improving my life and relationships with other people. He sometimes gives me assignments to do which we would talk about later such as:
Asking me to think about some particular idea to talk about later (for example asking me how much if any I would feel connected to my previous experiences as a male after completing transition.)
Had me make a collage using magazine/newspaper clippings on the theme of "who am I".
Suggest I write about some events immediately after they occur while they are fresh in my mind to make it easier to talk about later.
Make a list of recent things that trigger anxiety or depression.
Make a list of recent positive things or happy events in my life.
Give me some suggested reading.
Ask me to do something I was afraid of.
As the time for getting my surgery letter came near we talked about surgeons, the surgery, risks, recovery, aftercare, and how I was to finance it. We traded information and I made sure the therapist could tell that I had thoroughly researched surgery and had a realistic view of what it would do for me and what my life would be like afterward.
My third therapist was a PhD psychologist with GID experience that I went to in order to obtain a 2nd surgery letter. I asked for and signed a form with my primary therapist to allow him to share any and all information regarding my therapy with the secondary therapist in order to minimize my time needed with the 2nd and to make it clear my stories were honest and that I welcomed them to compare notes. This therapist did not really provide me with therapy since I was just getting my 2nd letter. He just needed to evaluate whether surgery was appropriate for me so he asked quite a few questions. After the first couple of sessions he told me that so far he saw nothing that would prevent him from writing the letter for surgery and he would likely be able to do that. Like the other therapists each session began with me just talking about what was new or whatever I wanted to bring up. I would talk about most of the same things I was covering with my primary therapist and would usually try to talk about some things that directly related to readiness for surgery. One difference in style with this one was that after the initial sessions if I ran out of things to say it could get very quiet with him waiting for me to bring up something else which could make me very nervous. The other therapists would always prompt me with some idea or question when that happened. All three therapists asked me at some point my opinion about treatment protocols and causes of GID. We sometimes talked about the controversial theories or efforts to stop GRS surgeries completely (Blanchard, Lawrence, Bailey, Paul McHugh, the Russell Reid lawsuits) and what I thought about those. I continued seeing him for several months and had my primary therapist sent him a copy of the first letter after which he provided the second.
If someone has already lived as their target gender for many years it should not take too long to get letters if you can provide evidence of that (name change records, employment records, proof of HRT, consistent story etc.) Even if you do not need therapy, most therapists are still going to want to see you long enough to be able to say they can see that you are consistent and persistent in your goals and presentation and have a clear understanding about surgery.
Therapy helped me at times, especially during transition when I needed someone impartial to vent to, face-to-face. In that sense of "therapy," she's generally been very good to me. It's not that she ever advised me on what to do exactly, but she did get me to think differently about some of the things which were bothering me, and helped me stay grounded overall.
But had I followed her direction, I'd STILL be waiting for an HRT letter (although I'd probably have killed myself by now), and I'd be under the care of a doctor 50 miles away who prescribes an obsolete and dangerous regimen. I keep breathing a HUGE "whew!" sigh of relief when I imagine what COULD have happened. As it turned out, I took the initiative and found my own resources to transition (including finding a doctor I respect very much). And THAT'S the best, most valuable lesson I came away with: her GateKeeper role forced me to assume TOTAL responsibility for transitioning, which is how it should have been anyway, IMHO.
~Kate~
Quote from: Ashley Michelle on November 26, 2007, 12:24:18 PM
Quote from: Kate on November 26, 2007, 08:58:29 AM
And THAT'S the best, most valuable lesson I came away with: her GateKeeper role forced me to assume TOTAL responsibility for transitioning, which is how it should have been anyway, IMHO.
wait, i made *you* responsible for my transitioning.... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
And I blame Lori, so she's really
Patient Zero here ;) I swear that girl musta gone through a dozen pairs of boots while kicking my...
Still though, the most helpful thing my therapist did for me was to GET IN MY WAY. Had she "helped" me, encouraged me to transition, recommended me for HRT... I bet I never would have developed the near-fanatical determination which I credit for getting me through this last year.
~Kate~
An interesting study, if slightly old, in Transgender Psychotherapy:
http://www.symposion.com/ijt/ijtvo06no01_03.htm
Thanks Straycat. The psychiatry sessions in Charing Cross, London, England are not like your experiences. We are usually bullied by the psychiatrist and not taken seriously and they question everything you are doing. It's a very unpleasant 30 mins and after the session you feel like suicide.......I had 6 years of that..
That was a long time ago now and I'm much happier away from that sinario...
i cant see a therapist for 6 years thanks to NHS burocracy and waiting lists... yet im ft nearly 6 months now. and ive been on hrt 11 months now... yes, i self medicated, and then was put on hrt by the nhs because of my intersex condition, and uncomfort with my raised gender... (massive kettle of fish to be left the hell out of this) I could get surgery tomorrow, and walk away from this a happy woman... therapy is only useful if you have uncertainties... im fairly happy and certain that im a girl, and no therapist going 'yes i agree, your a girl' is doing anyone any good... In some cases, its useful, some , waste of time.
R :police:
I am condidering starting therapy again-because I cannot afford the private route I am going to be reffered back to Charingx here in the u.k-which I am not looking foward to because they do give you a hard time-I suppose thats neccesary and have to trust that they only want whats best for me.
no. they really dont have whats best for you in mind... :P
thier useless, stuck in the past, and insane... two friends went through barret and got messed around something insane... one girl, because she was clocked as male once, got stopped hrt because she was evidently living as male >< ?
R :police:
Quote from: Rachael on November 28, 2007, 08:24:33 AMmessed around something insane... one girl, because she was clocked as male once, got stopped hrt because she was evidently living as male >< ?
Well, if that's the standard, most of us are f|_|cked.
British Gender identity clinics do nothing but slow you down, and try to stop you transitioning...im GLAD i self medicated. and transitioned MY way. im happy, unhindered, and i dont think therapy would have kept my family, or kept me from hear homelessness and poverty...
R :police:
Quote from: Rachael on November 28, 2007, 12:24:07 PM
British Gender identity clinics do nothing but slow you down, and try to stop you transitioning...im GLAD i self medicated. and transitioned MY way. im happy, unhindered, and i dont think therapy would have kept my family, or kept me from hear homelessness and poverty...
R :police:
There are two things 'therapy' and 'abuse' and unfortunitely the U.K NHS gender clinics use the latter. Rachael you are right to approach thing in your own way and that is what I should have done 7 years ago. Instead of listening to people who were only there to abuse and undermine my confidence and waste my time.
I very much understand your frustration Berleigh and Rachael. I'm concerned, though, that this thread is veering toward advocating self-medicating, so I do want to point out that going it your own way in the UK can also mean still sticking with medically supervised transition, and that that would be recommended because of the potential danger of self-medicating. Sounds like the NHS is basically funding it so they can say they do, and then putting every possible roadblock in the way of actually assisting people with transition. I'm starting to feel more and more fond of Canada's ad hoc system, where some of it is funded, but you have to find your own way through the specialists.
As to the original question, therapy is likely helpful for some and a waste of time for others. For me, I went to six sessions over three months and it was helpful for dealing with a lot of the fears around transition. The last session or two were basically just a chat with the therapist, though and I was just putting in time to get my hormone letter. I'm glad I went though.
Dennis
Quote from: Dennis on November 30, 2007, 08:30:57 AM
I very much understand your frustration Berleigh and Rachael. I'm concerned, though, that this thread is veering toward advocating self-medicating, so I do want to point out that going it your own way in the UK can also mean still sticking with medically supervised transition, and that that would be recommended because of the potential danger of self-medicating. Sounds like the NHS is basically funding it so they can say they do, and then putting every possible roadblock in the way of actually assisting people with transition. I'm starting to feel more and more fond of Canada's ad hoc system, where some of it is funded, but you have to find your own way through the specialists.
As to the original question, therapy is likely helpful for some and a waste of time for others. For me, I went to six sessions over three months and it was helpful for dealing with a lot of the fears around transition. The last session or two were basically just a chat with the therapist, though and I was just putting in time to get my hormone letter. I'm glad I went though.
Dennis
Dennis, what you need to understand is that in England, U.K there is not a system in any shape or form that is set up for 'Therapy'. It is a non entity. There also isn't any form of medical supervision for people who are transitioning and we all arrange our own lipid and blood tests with our GP's. Also the NHS has not funded any of my transition and even when I started on hormones in 2003 it was through a private psychitrist.
In England we don't have help sessions or therapy sessions. If we have appointrments with psychiatrists they do not offer therapy and the NHS psychiatrist appointments are only about two 30 minute appointments in one year if you are lucky. The psychiatrist session is more like a police interigation and their aim is to try and break people. They do not have any form of treatment program or timescale.
I don't condone self medication in Rachael's case but I certainly understand it and if the help and support isn't there what other alternative is there?
Im not condoning it... i dont even condone it in my own case... i was desperate, it was die, or live... live had some gambles and risks attachged... i was prepared to die than stay a guy...
it was an act of desperation and necesity in my case... BUT i am NOW on prescribed hrt... for the record... my gp took over my wellfare.
R :police:
Quote from: Rachael on November 30, 2007, 12:09:38 PM
Im not condoning it... i dont even condone it in my own case... i was desperate, it was die, or live... live had some gambles and risks attachged... i was prepared to die than stay a guy...
it was an act of desperation and necesity in my case... BUT i am NOW on prescribed hrt... for the record... my gp took over my wellfare.
R :police:
That was exactely my point Rachael....people do get to a desperate stage, especially when they are bluntly refused hormones by NHS gender clinics. I know of attempted suicide cases as a direct result of hormone refusal. It is dangerous to play around with people's lives but that is what the NHS psychiatrists do. Thery are both manipulative and cruel to the point of patients on their hands and knees and begging.......
I'm glad your GP is helping you but you might find he or she is the only one who is..
I'm nearly a year now away from the NHS gender clinic sinario and I am so happy about that.....
The more I hear about the UK the further down the list it gets as a possible place to visit.
I would sooner go to Iceland, but I think I would prefer Australia. Well it's warmer there then Canada, a good 3/4 of US, and Iceland. As for the bugs we just need to hang my pitcher on the wall outside.
And Denis you are quite right about medical care here as well. BC and Alberta, their health coverage covers SRS.
Cindy
Quote from: cindybc on November 30, 2007, 07:25:00 PM
The more I hear about the UK the further down the list it gets as a possible place to visit.
I would sooner go to Iceland, but I think I would prefer Australia. Well it's warmer there then Canada, a good 3/4 of US, and Iceland. As for the bugs we just need to hang my pitcher on the wall outside.
And Denis you are quite right about medical care here as well. BC and Alberta, their health coverage covers SRS.
Cindy
In the U.K we're about 30 years behind you as regards to Gender Dysphoria.. It's not a great place to live Cindy, it's very expensive compared to what we are able to earn and it's gradually getting worse. We pay about double what the U.S pays for fuel...
Hi Kimberly I was hoping you wouldn't take offence about what I said about the UK but since all the crap I been hearing from you and other girls here from UK....well it pisssssssses me off.
Cindy
To the O.P.:
I suppose that depends on what one considers therapy.
If you are talking Psychiatry, or professional Psychological Counciling,
Then I would say no, at least not for everyone.
I didn't use either.
But "therapy" is really kinda vague.
I mean we get support from our friends(if we have close friends) and to me that is theraputic.
I have a religious teacher. I go to him for advice and councilling.
It certainly has been "theraputic" in the broader sense of the word.
I also have a meditation practice. That is certainly theraputic.
So that all depends on what you mean.
Is a gender therapist nessicary?
That probably depends on the person.
Some people find it helpful, others have other outlets.
So it all depends.
Tink,
many completely bypass the system.
Hormones, lets face it plenty, thousands, get it online.
SRS, if you've been on hormone awhile, they'll accept you in Thailand.
I've been in therapy quite a while so I'm not anti-therapy,
just saying realistically, you can go around it if you want.
Is it a good thing? Well, that's another question entirely.
I do think that there are some, for which therapy is
totally useless. They are the epitome of being adjusted,
while others like me are a mess regardless of our gender thing.
Quote from: Keira on December 18, 2007, 01:55:07 AM
Tink,
many completely bypass the system.
Hormones, lets face it plenty, thousands, get it online.
SRS, if you've been on hormone awhile, they'll accept you in Thailand.
I've been in therapy quite a while so I'm not anti-therapy,
just saying realistically, you can go around it if you want.
Is it a good thing? Well, that's another question entirely.
I do think that there are some, for which therapy is
totally useless. They are the epitome of being adjusted,
while others like me are a mess regardless of our gender thing.
Is that true Keira? I ask because I have been on hormones for 10 years and have lived full time for 5 years but I haven't got two NHS psychiatrists referral letters.
They didnt GET the referal letters... thai surgeons just accept them....
Kiera: i self medicated for 8 months... it wasnt to bypas the system, it was because the system was so shocking, i wouldnt be seen for another _5_ YEARS.... am i to sit and wait patiently?
R :police:
Hey Rachael, How did your therapist respond to you having already started HRT? I been very afraid about going to a therapist because I fear they will make me stop HRT and don't know what I might do coming off hormones since I was such a wreck before hormones. I know going backward is not option for me. I also would love to have my health taken care of properly before this I could care less about my health and physical condition. I want to have a future and I really don't want to mess it up. I have a therapist number but don't have the courage to call her.
Good Morning
Anna
i havent seen one yet, as i said, im still in the cue waiting to see one in a few years time... by the time i get to therapy, ill probably be asked why i want to be a man ><
R :police:
For me I believe theraphy is needed not on a level of OMG what am I, I need help with life deal. Just plainly cause they hold all the strings, the say "You may have HRT now, you may SRS now", and even though there are other ways of getting both of these things, I do not want to self medicate, or have to take herbal type phyto estrogen, and plainly I dont wanna go to tailand for SRS.
So for me I am choosing the more expensive routes of the two, because for me quality versus quantity of time as my true self is what I am choosing.
BTW rachel, I see what you mean about F-uped the NHS is, you havent even been able to see a Therapist yet??
Can you pay to see a therapist??? Privately?
Quote from: Rachael on December 18, 2007, 06:35:07 AM
i havent seen one yet, as i said, im still in the cue waiting to see one in a few years time... by the time i get to therapy, ill probably be asked why i want to be a man ><
R :police:
That was very funny Rachael but so unbelievably close to truth in the U.K NHS....
That really happened to one of my friends once and the NHS Charing Cross psychiatrist thought she was a female to male, she played along with him until the end and then walked out in discust...
He's long since retired thank goodness..
Bypassing the system in the UK is probably the only way to get treated in due time.
I don't know why that system, or any system, would think that torturing
people by making them wait for years won't lead to severe problem.
Maybe people will need therapy just from having to deal with that system :eusa_wall:
The SOC says 3 months for homrones, if you have to wait years to be seem, well
you are not respecting the guidelines!!!!
Anyway, the gender clinics don't seem to care, they take the poor patients that had
to wait forever and are traumatized by that, while the others just go around them.
They just deny there is problem.
oh i COULD pay to go privately... but i prefer the roof over my head, and not starving to death tbh... i havent got £200 a hour for a private therapist...
R :police:
Come on Rachael, you're not giving starving to death a fair shake,
its quite righteous, really!! ;)
Quote from: Keira on December 18, 2007, 10:13:47 AM
Bypassing the system in the UK is probably the only way to get treated in due time.
I don't know why that system, or any system, would think that torturing
people by making them wait for years won't lead to severe problem.
Maybe people will need therapy just from having to deal with that system :eusa_wall:
The SOC says 3 months for homrones, if you have to wait years to be seem, well
you are not respecting the guidelines!!!!
Anyway, the gender clinics don't seem to care, they take the poor patients that had
to wait forever and are traumatized by that, while the others just go around them.
They just deny there is problem.
I totally agree with you Keira. I went through the U.K NHS system for 6 years but had to go private in order to start on hormones (yes it was £200 for a half hour appointment in 2003...but it was worth every penny for that prescription!). THE NHS GIC is not a fit system to deal with as far as gender dysphoria goes and I had to learn this the hard way...
two hundred pounds an hour!!! Holy crap! Thats like $400USD
I thought $95USD an hour and a half was alot.
You all should move here!
Quote from: Keira on December 18, 2007, 11:22:24 AM
Come on Rachael, you're not giving starving to death a fair shake,
its quite righteous, really!! ;)
Like yah! its like, totally the path to skinny! skinny = beautiful! im like so, like with you!
hm yeah, well, meh, id move to the us, but as expensive as the UK is, the US just plain SUCKS for ts people :P
im ballencing crapness here!
R :police:
It has its dissadvantages but mainly from what i can see only in healthcare, and un TS educated people more or less.
Otherwise it is a rather open country.
Hows finding work being TS in the UK?
I guess I was fortunate in two ways. When I went to see my shrink for a referral to an endo to get on the hormones I was on a disability pension. I was working as a social worker part time until two years ago. I was by no means rolling around in dough but it payed the rent and the bills and maybe a few road trips once in a while. Came a long ways from the gipsy kid living on the road. My health insurance covered the docs and my disability actually covered the hormones. And here in Vancouver the health insurance covers the SRS.
Cindy
Quote from: maragirlygirr on December 18, 2007, 12:25:59 PM
It has its dissadvantages but mainly from what i can see only in healthcare, and un TS educated people more or less.
Otherwise it is a rather open country.
Hows finding work being TS in the UK?
I don't think finding work is that hard in the U.K and I've never disclosed that I'm TS to anyone....why should it need to be an issue and I'm not going to tell anyone if I go for an interview....
The bigger problem is the U.K itself. Any work is usually very badly paid against the balance of the high cost of living in the U.K (especially fuel, food, clothes, electricity etc) compared to the standard of living in the U.S...
not everyone passes well
I definetly think so. (Although I still can't spell). It really helped me to have someone who knew the ropes and had been through it all before with others. And location is really no excuse. I live in MT and my therapist is in FL!! (Dr. Bushong) Yeah it would be nice to have a face to face, but the phone conveys info just as well. This was one of my only options as most people don't even know what GID is! He has really helped me to avoid the many pitfalls and misinformation out there. Basically I'd have to say that therapy is essential whatever the cost.
Also I haven't been to the UK but I have to say that I live in one of the most behind the times states that there is, and have never been hassled once in the last two years. I imagine that other states can't be that bad. Well maybe. I also think that how people treat you has a lot to do with how you interact with them. When I first came out of the closet i got read all the time, but usually laughed it off or made a joke about it, rather than getting offended or angry. That really seemed to put people at ease and even though they figured it out they still seemed comfortable.
It's a shame this stuff about the NHS.
Iv'e heard such good things about it in other areas.
I had an apendendectomy surgery many years ago, and it cost about 60 thousand dollars.
Luckily I was covered by my parrents insurance at the time, and it was completely paid for.
But later I got into a skateboarding accident after I left home, and the hospital charged me a thousand dollars to clean some road rash and give me an IV of saline.
I am still paying that off.
I guess sorry they are so lousy with Trans stuff, but it could be worse.
If I had my appendex rupture now, I would have to declare bankrupcy.
I would never be able to pay that off. Not with College loans as well.
I'd leave school with like 100 thousand dollars in debt due to combined medical and school debt.
-So at least you don't have to pay insurance/or be screwed.
The NHS may suck in some areas, but it's better than our system, that's for darn sure.
-Sarah
Hi Audrey,
Yes, personality and attitude and a little self effacing humor does play a big roll in whether people out there will accept you even in a little town, I came out in the town I lived in pop 16000 and I also had to go out of town to get therapy. I lived and worked as Cindy for 7 years in that town and never had a problem with any of the town folk, if anything they were really nice people.
Cindy
Does anyone have experience with Dr. Carl Bushong of Transgendercare? I talked with him twice and am not sure if he's the one for me, but at the same time he intimates that he can help in some really useful ways. If you know him, could you please give me your opinion?
Thanks,
Sophie
Quote from: SophieG on April 07, 2011, 12:20:18 PM
Does anyone have experience with Dr. Carl Bushong of Transgendercare? I talked with him twice and am not sure if he's the one for me, but at the same time he intimates that he can help in some really useful ways. If you know him, could you please give me your opinion?
Thanks,
Sophie
Sophie,
I am sorry no one responded to you right away. I suspect you could post your question as an individual topic. I was catching up on some time I was not here and found you hand joined and posted. I would suggest you use the the subcategory of therapy that is under the transition category.
Welcome to the site.
We have a lot of members so someone is bound to be able to address your question.
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Once again, welcome to Susan's. Look around, ask questions and join in.
With warmth,
Jacqui
The way it goes now in us, I'd rather (personally) not deal with any psychiatric and not have my name in the system. But I'm well balanced person with steel nerves and no mental/emotional problems. My Gender dysphoria is not a problem that needs any treatment.
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Therapy in the UK is a joke at best, I've had one person try to talk me out of transitioning telling me " your a good looking guy why! Would you want to be a girl " I was WHAT THE <Not Permitted> yes it might be free compared to are American friends but her get want her pays for.😠
I think its needed. we have patients post GRS who still seem to have depression and don't know why. I honestly think everyone needs a little therapy at one point or another throughout their lives. Gives you a outside perspective
I think it is advisable at least at the stage of when one recognises for the first time that one is trans. Being trans is a huge obstacle course and to have somebody assist with sorting out a few of the issue that can crop up can be enormously helpful.
Having read about some people de-transitioning after having gone through hormone therapy and in some instances surgery, it just cements my argument that a good gender therapist is important at least in the beginning to make sure that the issues are really purely gender related and that transition is the only way forward. There are many options out there and these need to be explored with an independent but experienced gender therapist.
I did see one for two sessions just to have such an independent person to hear my story for the first time, and be the devil's advocate. They agreed that I am the most sane and emotionally stable person they have come across and that my gender dysphoria is not a mental illness that requires anything other than what I choose i.e. hormones, top surgery. I didn't need their letter of support to obtain hormones since my doc operates on Informed Consent model, but I'm likely to need the therapist's letter for my top surgery.
Is a therapist really needed? No. But they can be very useful.
This is a tough process. Realizing who you are, making the right decision for yourself, potentially losing things along the way, worrying about the future. For me therapy is a necessity, I would be lost without it.
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So far the only point of therapy for me has been so I can get diagnosed and signed up for hormones.
The therapy itself is fairly useless to me as the therapists don't offer much in the way of advice or feedback. If talking is supposed to help me understand where I'm at - well I already know where I'm at, that's why I took the step of getting referred to a GIC. I still don't know why they want me to have more sessions of it. I have a practical brain - I see a problem, I think carefully about it for two years, weigh the risks/benefits to myself, look at the feasibility in my situation, acknowledge things may change along the way, but otherwise I decided to undertake it. Nearly a year on hormones and everything is fine, much better in fact. At this point it feels like they are looking for something in my case to delay surgery, or looking for something that isn't there.
I'm happy enough to talk to them; I can talk to anyone about anything. It just doesn't have great benefits for me to do so with the therapists. Maybe it would if they actually gave more feedback, I don't know. It feels like a one-way conversation or interrogation, mostly.
In my case, I didn't have a choice. I don't have the money for therapy. The way I got on hormones was through informed consent, which was a HUGE weight off my shoulders. The drawback though is I didn't see some professional to talk about my feelings or why I have these urges, maybe talking with someone could help me determine if I needed to or not. To this day since I'm on hormones, nothing has changed. I feel much better, and I generally feel like I'm going places, and my motivation boosted significantly...the only "regret" or sadness I have is that no matter what people in my family will not condone what I'm doing, other then that nothing about transitioning for me has been at all negative in the slightest.
I don't know what therapy is like but I have mixed reviews on it. The only therapy I've gotten was employee assistance program benefits which covered three free sessions, I saw a counselor, but not to talk about transition. It was mainly because of my fear and worry that my social anxiety and issues were causing me to do poorly in work and school, I was also curious in knowing if I could be diagnosed with anxiety, or even aspergers. I didnt find much help in that, she said I didnt seem like I had those issues, but I know that isn't quite true because I do have issues serious enough to cause those issues at all. All we really did was talk and she gave me some papers, advice, coping strategies and all that. It did work a little...but nothing specific to what I wanted, it seemed pointless after three sessions. Granted, she was only a counselor. I should probably see a psychiatrist next time.
That's just my experience, if you can get therapy easily I say go for it! It doesn't hurt to try
The fact that you are asking whether therapy is needed seems to be proof that you desire outside input. The only remaining question, therefore, is what sort of input would benefit you most. These are the types of support I have received, ranked from most to least valuable:
1. Support from family and friends (and non-support from this cohort has also been the most damaging)
2. Professional counseling
3. Friendship with other TG people
4. TG support groups
5. Susan's Place and other online contacts
I should hasten to say that I love (and financially support) SP, and that I would not like to have to do without it. Its strength arises from the 24/7 activity and the sheer numbers of people/stories available. Nevertheless, there really is no substitute for either face to face conversations or ongoing relationships.
What I have gained from counseling owes to the total confidentiality of the arrangement and the professional expertise of my counselors. In session, there is no reason to or benefit from saying anything other than the unmitigated truth of my experience. Things that I filter or soften before saying here, to friends or even to my spouse are laid out on the table. It takes time for sufficient trust to develop, but once you get there, the opportunities to learn about yourself are without parallel.
I really can't recommend it highly enough, and if you persist here, you will find this advice peppered all over the pages of Susan's.
I wish you the best in your journey.
No. Overrated
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I think it can be helpful OR a hindrance... The hindrance is mostly if you get a bad therapist (which believe me, I've had my fair share of in dealing with anxiety).
IF you know you are transgender, exactly where you fall on the transgender spectrum, and what your goals are, then I don't think a therapist is completely necessary, HOWEVER that said, if you are planning to transition, you need to look at not only doctor requirements/government requirements for transition, but also your insurance requirements (if in the US or other places that make you have insurance/pay for healthcare). For example, I believe my insurance, which has (For now) an AMAZING trans healthcare plan, requires a therapist to diagnose you with gender dysphoria and a certain amount of therapy before especially the surgeries. I don't remember the exact requirements for the hormone therapies though.
Now, if you are uncertain about anything, I feel like finding a good therapist is in your best interest. Sure you can post in forums like this, look at videos online, talk to other people who are transgender. But your therapist will get to know you, follow your journey, and guide you through figuring things out. Like, I started out with my therapist not knowing where I am on the gender spectrum, other than not strictly female and very masculine. I still am discovering on my own a lot about myself, but as I have spent the past couple months in therapy, I've come to a deeper understanding of what transgender means for me, how to cope, deal with my anxiety that isn't even always about gender, how to accept myself and all it entails. And we're starting to pave the way into where we go from here. My journey is still far from over, but I've come a long way. And I owe a lot of it to my therapist
It's quite simple, some people don't have Gender Dysphoria, so why should they Transition !
Psyciatrists & Clinical Psychologists are a great asset in the persons gender confirmation process, just like Endocrinologists & Surgeons.
At the end of the Day, Gender Dysphoria is a medical issue, which makes it completely different from Gender Fluiditity, Non Binery, Transgender Spectrum.
Ive been through a lot of therapy doesn't bother me
Not for me, had a phone session to get private HRT but that's it. Still I am a laid back person and I know what I want/need. Then of course I have my online therapist (susans)
My therapist was the first person I came out to, and forms a valuable part of my support network, that also includes a local Trans* support group and ofc Susan's.
I'm a strong proponent of good therapy, and I talk about things with them that I would not discuss in any other circle.
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Quote from: AlphaGirl on September 09, 2017, 08:03:21 PM
It's quite simple, some people don't have Gender Dysphoria, so why should they Transition !
Psyciatrists & Clinical Psychologists are a great asset in the persons gender confirmation process, just like Endocrinologists & Surgeons.
At the end of the Day, Gender Dysphoria is a medical issue, which makes it completely different from Gender Fluiditity, Non Binery, Transgender Spectrum.
This forum welcomes ALL identities.
THAT SAID I do believe your initial point was that quite simply, a therapist is good for helping you figure out your gender identity. Which I completely agree with.